CHAPTER IV.
A SAD EVENT.
A few weeks" residence found me quite at home at the Hall. My new-found relatives treated me with the affectionate familiarity which exists between old and long-tried friends. I ceased to feel myself the despised _poor relation_; a creature rarely loved and always in the way, expected to be the recipient of all the kicks and cuffs of the family to whom his ill-fortune has made him an attache, and to return the base coin with smiles and flattering speeches.
Of all lots in this hard world, the hardest to bear must be that of a domestic drudge; war, war to the knife is better than such humiliating servitude. I could neither fawn nor cringe, and the Baronet, who was a high-spirited man himself, loved me for my independence.
The summer had just commenced. No hunting, no shooting to while away an idle hour. But Sir Alexander was as fond of old Izaak Walton"s gentle craft, as that accomplished piscator, and we often rose at early dawn to stroll through the dewy pastures to the stream which crossed the park, which abounded with trout, and I soon became an excellent angler, hooking my fish in the most scientific manner.
When the days were not propitious for our sport, I accompanied Sir Alexander in his rides, in visiting his model farms, examining the progress of his crops, the making of hay, the improved breeds of sheep and cattle, and all such healthy and rural employments, in which he took a patriarchal delight.
Margaretta generally accompanied us on these expeditions. She was an excellent equestrian, and managed her high-bred roan with much skill and ease, never disturbing the pleasure of the ride by nervous or childish fears.
"Madge is a capital rider!" would the old Baronet exclaim. "I taught her myself. There is no affectation--no show-off airs in her riding.
She does that as she does everything else, in a quiet, natural way."
The enjoyment of our country life was seldom disturbed by visitors.
All the great folks were in London; the beauties of nature possessing far less attractions for them than the sophisticated gaieties of the season in town. If his youth had been dissipated, Sir Alexander courted retirement in age, and was perfectly devoted to the quiet happiness of a domestic life.
Margaretta, who shared all his tastes, and whose presence appeared necessary to his existence, had spent one season in London, but cared so little for the pleasures of the metropolis, that she resisted the urgent entreaties of her female friends to accompany them to town a second time.
"I hate London, Cousin Geoffrey. There is no room in its crowded scenes for nature and truth. Every one seems intent upon acting a lie, and living in defiance of their reason and better feelings. I never could feel at home there. I mistrusted myself and every one else, and never knew what true happiness was, until I returned to the unaffected simplicity of a country life."
These sentiments were fully reciprocated by me, who had pa.s.sed, within the smoky walls of the huge metropolis the most unhappy period of my life.
Same hours, every day, were devoted by Sir Alexander to business, during which he was closely closeted with Mr. Hilton, his steward, and to disturb him at such times was regarded by him as an act of high treason.
During these hours, Margaretta and I were left to amuse ourselves in the best manner we could. She was a fine pianist. I had inherited my father"s pa.s.sion for music, and was never tired of listening to her while she played. If the weather was unfavourable for a ride or stroll in the Park, I read aloud to her, while she painted groups of flowers from nature, for which she had an exquisite taste. The time fled away only too fast, and this mingling of amus.e.m.e.nt and mental occupation was very delightful to me, whose chief employment for years had been confined to musty parchments in a dull, dark office.
Our twilight rambles through the glades of the beautiful park, at that witching hour when both eye and heart are keenly alive to sights and sounds of beauty, possessed for me the greatest charm.
I loved--but only as a brother loves--the dear, enthusiastic girl, who leaned so confidingly on my arm, whose glorious eyes, lighted up from the very fountain of pa.s.sion and feeling, were raised to mine as if to kindle in my breast the fire of genius which emanated from her own.
Her vivid imagination, fostered in solitude, seized upon everything bright and beautiful in nature, and made it her own.
"The lips of song burst open And the words of fire rushed out."
At such moments it was impossible to regard Margaretta with indifference. I could have loved, nay, adored, had not my mind been preoccupied with a fairer image.
Margaretta was too great a novice in affairs of the heart, to notice the guarded coolness of my homage. My society afforded her great pleasure, and she wanted the common-place tact of her s.e.x to disguise it from me.
Dear, lovely, confiding Margaretta, how beautiful does your simple truth and disinterested affection appear, as I look back through the long vista of years, and find in the world so few who resemble thee!
Towards the close of a hot day in June we visited the fragrant fields of new-mown hay, and Margaretta tired herself by chasing a pair of small, coquettish blue b.u.t.terflies, who hovered along the hedge, which bounded the dusty highway, like living gems, and not succeeding in capturing the shy things, she proposed leaving the road, and returning home through the Park.
"With all my heart," said I. "We will rest under your favourite beech, while you, dear Madge, sing with your sweet voice, the
"Drowsy world to rest."
We crossed a stile, and entered one of the broad, green arcades of the glorious old Park.
For some time we reposed upon the velvet sward, beneath Margaretta"s favourite tree. The slanting red beams of the setting sun scarcely forced their way through the thickly interlaced boughs of the forest.
The sparkling wavelets of the river ran brawling at our feet, fighting their way among the sharp rocks that opposed a barrier to their downward course. We bathed our temples in the cool, clear waters.
Margaretta forgot the dusty road, the independent blue b.u.t.terflies, and her recent fatigue.
"There is no music after all like the music of nature, Geoffrey," she said, untying her straw bonnet, and throwing it on the gra.s.s beside her, while she shook a shower of glossy black ringlets back from her small oval face.
"Not that it is the instrument, but the soul that breathes through it, which makes the music. And Nature, pouring her soul into these waves, and stirring with her plaintive sighs these branches above us, awakens sounds which find an echo in the heart of all her children, who remain true to the teachings of the divine mother." Then turning suddenly to me, she said, "Geoffrey, do you sing?"
"To please myself. I play upon the flute much better than I sing.
During the last half year I remained with my uncle I took lessons of an excellent master, and having a good ear, and being pa.s.sionately fond of music, I gained considerable proficiency. I had been an amateur performer for years."
"And you never told me one word of this before."
"I did not wish to display all my trifling stock of accomplishments at once," said I, with a smile. "Those who possess but little are wise to reserve a small portion of what they have. You shall test its value the next rainy day."
"In the absence of the flute, Geoffrey, you must give me a song. A song that harmonizes with this witching hour and holiday time o" the year."
"Then it must necessarily be a love song," said I; "youth and spring being the best adapted to inspire the joyousness of love."
"Call not love joyous, Geoffrey; it is a sad and fearful thing to love. Love that is sincere is a hidden emotion of the heart; it shrinks from vain laughter, and is most eloquent when silent, or only revealed by tears."
I started, and turned an anxious gaze upon her pale, spiritual face.
What right had I to be jealous of her? I who was devoted to another.
Yet jealous I was, and answered rather pettishly:
"You talk feelingly, fair cousin, as if you had experienced the pa.s.sion you describe. Have you tasted the bitter sadness of disappointed love?"
"I did not say that." And she blushed deeply. "You chose to infer it."
I did not reply. The image of Harrison rose in my mind. For the first time I saw a strong likeness between them. Such a likeness as is often found between persons who strongly a.s.similate--whose feelings, tastes, and pursuits are the same.
Was it possible that she had loved him? I was anxious to find out if my suspicions were true; and without any prelude or apology commenced singing a little air that Harrison had taught me, both music and words being his own.
SONG.
I loved you long and tenderly, I urged my suit with tears; But coldly and disdainfully You crushed the hope of years.
I gazed upon your glowing cheek, I met your flashing eye; The words I strove in vain to, speak Were smothered in a sigh.
I swore to love you faithfully, Till death should bid us part; But proudly and reproachfully, You spurned a loyal heart.
Despair is bold--you turned away, And wished we ne"er had met, Through many a long and weary day That parting haunts me yet.
Nor think that chilling apathy, Can pa.s.sion"s tide repress-- Ah, no! with fond idolatry, I would not love thee less.
Your image meets me in the crowd, Like some fair beam of light, That bursting through its sombre cloud Makes glad the brow of night.