"Where, when, and how?" he asked, looking disturbed and yet relieved.
She told him rapidly, and as she ended she looked up at him with her sweet face, so full of pity, shame, and grief it would have been impossible to deny her anything.
"Can you forgive me for discovering this affliction?"
"I think I could forgive you a far greater fault, Lillian," he answered, in a tone that said many things.
"But deceit is so mean, so dishonorable and contemptible, how can you so easily pardon it in me?" she asked, quite overcome by this forgiveness, granted without any reproach.
"Then you would find it hard to pardon such a thing in another?" he said, with the expression that always puzzled her.
"Yes, it would be hard; but in those I loved, I could forgive much for love"s sake."
With a sudden gesture he took her hand saying, impulsively, "How little changed you are! Do you remember that last ride of ours nearly five years ago?"
"Yes, Paul," she answered, with averted eyes.
"And what we talked of?"
"A part of that childish gossip I remember well."
"Which part?"
"The pretty little romance you told me." And Lillian looked up now, longing to ask if Helen"s childhood had been blighted like her youth.
Paul dropped her hand as if he, read her thoughts, and his own hand went involuntarily toward his breast, betraying that the locket still hung there.
"What did I say?" he asked, smiling at her sudden shyness.
"You vowed you"d win and wed your fair little lady-love if you lived."
"And so I will," he cried, with sudden fire in his eyes.
"What, marry her?"
"Aye, that I will."
"Oh Paul, will you tie yourself for life to a--" The word died on her lips, but a gesture of repugnance finished the speech.
"A what?" he demanded, excitedly.
"An innocent, one bereft of reason," stammered Lillian, entirely forgetting herself in her interest for him.
"Of whom do you speak?" asked Paul, looking utterly bewildered,
"Of poor Helen."
"Good heavens, who told you that base lie?" And his voice deepened with indignant pain.
"I saw her, you did not deny her affliction; Hester said so, and I believed it. Have I wronged her, Paul?"
"Yes, cruelly. She is blind, but no idiot, thank G.o.d."
There was such earnestness in his voice, such reproach in his words, and such ardor in his eye, that Lillian"s pride gave way, and with a broken entreaty for pardon, she covered up her face, weeping the bitterest tears she ever shed. For in that moment, and the sharp pang it brought her, she felt how much she loved Paul and how hard it was to lose him.
The childish affection had blossomed into a woman"s pa.s.sion, and in a few short weeks had pa.s.sed through many phases of jealousy, hope, despair, and self-delusion. The joy she felt on seeing him again, the pride she took in him, the disgust Helen caused her, the relief she had not dared to own even to herself, when she fancied fate had put an insurmountable barrier between Paul and his cousin, the despair at finding it only a fancy, and the anguish of hearing him declare his unshaken purpose to marry his first love--all these conflicting emotions had led to this hard moment, and now self-control deserted her in her need. In spite of her efforts the pa.s.sionate tears would have their way, though Paul soothed her with a.s.surances of entire forgiveness, promises of Helen"s friendship, and every gentle device he could imagine. She commanded herself at last by a strong effort, murmuring eagerly as she shrank from the hand that put back her fallen hair, and the face so full of tender sympathy bending over her:
"I am so grieved and ashamed at what I have said and done. I shall never dare to see Helen. Forgive me, and forget this folly. I"m sad and heavyhearted just now; it"s the anniversary of Papa"s death, and Mamma always suffers so much at such times that I get nervous."
"It is your birthday also. I remembered it, and ventured to bring a little token in return for the one you gave me long ago. This is a talisman, and tomorrow I will tell you the legend concerning it. Wear it for my sake, and G.o.d bless you, dear."
The last words were whispered hurriedly; Lillian saw the glitter of an antique ring, felt the touch of bearded lips on her hand, and Paul was gone.
But as he left the house he set his teeth, exclaiming low to himself, "Yes, tomorrow there shall be an end of this! We must risk everything and abide the consequences now. I"ll have no more torment for any of us."
Chapter VII
THE SECRET KEY
"Is Lady Trevlyn at home, Bedford?" asked Paul, as he presented himself at an early hour next day, wearing the keen, stern expression which made him look ten years older than he was.
"No, sir, my lady and Miss Lillian went down to the Hall last night."
"No ill news, I hope?" And the young man"s eye kindled as if he felt a crisis at hand.
"Not that I heard, sir. Miss Lillian took one of her sudden whims and would have gone alone, if my lady hadn"t given in much against her will, this being a time when she is better away from the place."
"Did they leave no message for me?"
"Yes, sir. Will you step in and read the note at your ease. We are in sad confusion, but this room is in order."
Leading the way to Lillian"s boudoir, the man presented the note and retired. A few hasty lines from my lady, regretting the necessity of this abrupt departure, yet giving no reason for it, hoping they might meet next season, but making no allusion to seeing him at the Hall, desiring Lillian"s thanks and regards, but closing with no hint of Helen, except compliments. Paul smiled as he threw it into the fire, saying to himself, "Poor lady, she thinks she has escaped the danger by flying, and Lillian tries to hide her trouble from me. Tender little heart! I"ll comfort it without delay."
He sat looking about the dainty room still full of tokens of her presence. The piano stood open with a song he liked upon the rack; a bit of embroidery, whose progress he had often watched, lay in her basket with the little thimble near it; there was a strew of papers on the writing table, torn notes, sc.r.a.ps of drawing, and ball cards; a pearl-colored glove lay on the floor; and in the grate the faded flowers he had brought two days before. As his eye roved to and fro, he seemed to enjoy some happy dream, broken too soon by the sound of servants shutting up the house. He arose but lingered near the table, as if longing to search for some forgotten hint of himself.
"No, there has been enough lock picking and stealthy work; I"ll do no more for her sake. This theft will harm no one and tell no tales." And s.n.a.t.c.hing up the glove, Paul departed.
"Helen, the time has come. Are you ready?" he asked, entering her room an hour later.
"I am ready." And rising, she stretched her hand to him with a proud expression, contrasting painfully with her helpless gesture.
"They have gone to the Hall, and we must follow. It is useless to wait longer; we gain nothing by it, and the claim must stand on such proof as we have, or fall for want of that one link. I am tired of disguise. I want to be myself and enjoy what I have won, unless I lose it all."
"Paul, whatever happens, remember we cling together and share good or evil fortune as we always have done. I am a burden, but I cannot live without you, for you are my world. Do not desert me."
She groped her way to him and clung to his strong arm as if it was her only stay. Paul drew her close, saying wistfully, as he caressed the beautiful sightless face leaning on his shoulder, "_Mia cara_, would it break your heart, if at the last hour I gave up all and let the word remain unspoken? My courage fails me, and in spite of the hard past I would gladly leave them in peace."