To have seen the _Caisse Territoriale_ as I have seen it, fireless rooms, never swept, covered with the dust of the desert, notices of protest piled high on the desks, a notice of sale on execution at the door every week, and my ragout diffusing the odor of a poor man"s kitchen over it all; and to witness now the rehabilitation of our Society in its newly-furnished salons, where it is my duty to light ministerial fires, in the midst of a busy throng, with whistles, electric bells, piles of gold pieces so high that they topple over--it borders on the miraculous. To convince myself that it is all true, I have to look at myself in the gla.s.s, to gaze at my iron-gray coat trimmed with silver, my white cravat, my usher"s chain such as I used to wear at the Faculty on council days. And to think that, to effect this transformation, to bring back to our brows the gayety that is the mother of concord, to restore to our paper its value ten times over and to our dear Governor the esteem and confidence of which he was so unjustly deprived, it only needed one man, that supernatural Croesus whom the hundred voices of fame designate by the name of the Nabob.
Oh! the first time that he came into the offices, with his fine presence, his face, a little wrinkled perhaps but so distinguished, the manners of an habitue of courts, on familiar terms with all the princes of the Orient, in a word with the indescribable touch of self-confidence and grandeur that great fortune gives, I felt my heart swell in my waistcoat with its double row of b.u.t.tons. They may say all they choose about their equality and fraternity, there are some men who are so much above others, that you feel like falling on your face before them and inventing new formulae of adoration to compel them to pay some attention to you. Let me hasten to add that I had no need of anything of the sort to attract the attention of the Nabob. When I rose as he pa.s.sed--deeply moved but dignified: you can always trust Pa.s.sajon--he looked at me with a smile and said in an undertone to the young man who accompanied him: "What a fine head, like--" then a word that I did not hear, a word ending in _ard_, like leopard. But no, it could not be that, for I am not conscious of having a head like a leopard. Perhaps he said like Jean-Bart, although I do not see the connection. However, he said: "What a fine head, like--" and his condescension made me proud. By the way, all the gentlemen are very kind, very polite to me. It seems that there has been a discussion in regard to me, whether they should keep me or send me away like our cashier, that crabbed creature who was always talking about sending everybody to the galleys, and whom they requested to go and make his economical shirt-fronts somewhere else. Well done! That will teach him to use vulgar language to people.
When it came to me, the Governor was kind enough to forget my rather hasty words in consideration of my certificates of service at the _Territoriale_ and elsewhere; and after the council meeting he said to me with his musical accent: "Pa.s.sajon, you are to stay on with us." You can imagine whether I was happy, whether I lost myself in expressions of grat.i.tude. Just consider! I should have gone away with my few sous, with no hope of ever earning any more, obliged to go and cultivate my little vineyard at Montbars, a very narrow field for a man who has lived among all the financial aristocracy of Paris and the bold strokes of financiering that make fortunes. Instead of that, here I am established all anew in a superb position, my wardrobe replenished, and my savings, which I actually held in my hand for a whole day, intrusted to the fostering care of the Governor, who has undertaken to make them yield a handsome return. I rather think that he is the man who knows how to do it. And not the slightest occasion for anxiety. All apprehensions vanish before the word that is all the fashion at this moment in all administrative councils, at all meetings of the shareholders, on the Bourse, on the boulevards, everywhere: "The Nabob is in the thing." That is to say, we are running over with cash, the worst _combin.a.z.ioni_ are in excellent shape.
That man is so rich!
Rich to such a degree that one cannot believe it. Why, he has just loaned fifteen millions off-hand to the Bey of Tunis. Fifteen millions, I say! That was rather a neat trick on Hemerlingue, who tried to make trouble between him and that monarch and to cut the gra.s.s from under his feet in those lovely Oriental countries, where it grows tall and thick and golden-colored. It was an old Turk of my acquaintance, Colonel Brahim, one of our council at the _Territoriale_, who arranged the loan. Naturally the bey, who was very short of pocket money, it seems, was greatly touched by the Nabob"s zeal to accommodate him, and he sent him by Brahim a letter of acknowledgment in which he told him that on his next trip to Vichy he would pa.s.s two days with him at the magnificent Chateau de Saint-Romans, which the former bey, this one"s brother, once honored with a visit. Just think what an honor! To receive a reigning prince! The Hemerlingues are in a frenzy. They had manoeuvred so skilfully, the son in Tunis, the father in Paris, to bring the Nabob into disfavor. To be sure, fifteen millions is a large sum of money. But do not say: "Pa.s.sajon is gulling us." The person who told me the story had in his hands the paper sent by the bey in a green silk envelope stamped with the royal seal. His only reason for not reading it was that it was written in Arabic; otherwise he would have taken cognizance of it as he does of all the Nabob"s correspondence.
That person is his valet de chambre, M. Noel, to whom I had the honor to be presented last Friday at a small party of persons in service, which he gave to some of his friends. I insert a description of that festivity in my memoirs, as one of the most interesting things I have seen during my four years" residence in Paris.
I supposed at first, when M. Francis, Monpavon"s valet de chambre, mentioned the affair to me, that it was to be one of the little clandestine junkets such as they sometimes have in the attic rooms on our boulevard, with the leavings sent up by Mademoiselle Seraphine and the other cooks in the house, where they drink stolen wine and stuff themselves, sitting on trunks, trembling with fear, by the light of two candles which they put out at the slightest noise in the corridors.
Such underhand performances are repugnant to my character. But when I received an invitation on pink paper, written in a very fine hand, as if for a ball given by the people of the house:
_M. Noel pri M.--de se randre a sa soire du 25 couran._
_On soupra._[3]
[3] M. Noel requests the pleasure of M. ----"s company on the evening of the 25th instant. Supper.
I saw, notwithstanding the defective orthography, that it was a serious, authoritative function; so I arrayed myself in my newest frock coat and my finest linen, and betook myself to Place Vendome, to the address indicated by the invitation.
M. Noel had selected for his party the evening of a first performance at the Opera, which society attended _en ma.s.se_, so that the whole household had the bit in their teeth until midnight, and the entire house at their disposal. Nevertheless, our host had preferred to receive us in his room in the upper part of the house, and I strongly approved his judgment, being therein of the opinion of the good man who said:
Fi du plaisir Que la crainte peut corrompre![4]
[4]
A fig for the pleasure Which fear can destroy!
But talk to me about the attics on Place Vendome! A thick carpet on the floor, the bed out of sight in an alcove, Algerian curtains with red stripes, a green marble clock, the whole lighted by patent self-regulating lamps. Our dean, M. Chalmette, at Dijon had no better quarters than that. I arrived about nine o"clock with Monpavon"s old Francis, and I must confess that my appearance created a sensation, preceded as I was by the fame of my academic past, by my reputation for refined manners and great learning. My fine bearing did the rest, for I must say that I know how to carry myself. M. Noel, very dark skinned, with mutton-chop whiskers, and dressed in a black coat, came forward to meet us.
"Welcome, Monsieur Pa.s.sajon," he said; and taking my cap with silver ornaments, which, as I entered the room, I held in my right hand according to custom, he handed it to an enormous negro in red and gold livery.
"Here, Lakdar, take this--and this," he said, by way of jest, giving him a kick in a certain portion of the back.
There was much laughter at that sally, and we began to converse most amicably. An excellent fellow, that M. Noel, with his Southern accent, his determined bearing, the frankness and simplicity of his manners. He reminded me of the Nabob, minus his master"s distinguished mien, however. Indeed, I noticed that evening that such resemblances are of common occurrence in valets de chambre, who, as they live on intimate terms with their masters, by whom they are always a little dazzled, end by adopting their peculiarities and their mannerisms. For instance, M.
Francis has a certain habit of drawing himself up and displaying his linen shirtfront, a mania for raising his arms to pull down his cuffs, which is Monpavon to the life. But there is one who does not resemble his master in the least, that is Joe, Dr. Jenkins" coachman. I call him Joe, but at the party everybody called him Jenkins; for in that circle the stable folk among themselves call one another by their employers"
names, plain Bois-l"Hery, Monpavon and Jenkins. Is it to debase the superiors, to exalt the servant cla.s.s? Every country has its customs; n.o.body but a fool ought to be astonished by them. To return to Joe Jenkins--how can the doctor, who is such an amiable man, so perfect in every respect, keep in his service that _gin_ and _porter_-soaked brute, who sits silent for hours at a time, and then, the instant that the liquor goes to his head, begins to roar and wants to box everybody--witness the scandalous scene that had just taken place when we arrived.
The marquis"s little tiger, Tom Bois-l"Hery, as they call him here, undertook to joke with that Irish beast, who--at some Parisian gamin"s jest--retorted by a terrible Belfast knock-down blow in the middle of the face.
"Come on, Humpty-Dumpty! Come on, Humpty-Dumpty!" roared the coachman, choking with rage, while they carried his innocent victim into the adjoining room, where the ladies, young and old, were engaged in bandaging his nose. The excitement was soon allayed, thanks to our arrival, thanks also to the judicious words of M. Barreau, a man of mature years, sedate and majestic, of my own type. He is the Nabob"s cook, formerly _chef_ at the Cafe Anglais, and M. Cardailhac, manager of the Nouveautes, secured him for his friend. To see him in his black coat and white cravat, with his handsome, full, clean-shaven face, you would take him for one of the great functionaries of the Empire. To be sure, a cook in a house where the table is set for thirty people every morning, in addition to Madame"s table, and where everyone is fed on the best and the extra best, is no ordinary cook-shop artist. He receives a colonel"s salary, with board and lodging, and then the perquisites! No one has any idea of what the perquisites amount to in a place like that. So every one addressed him with great respect, with the consideration due to a man of his importance: "Monsieur Barreau"
here, "my dear Monsieur Barreau" there. You must not imagine that the servants in a house are all chums and social equals. Nowhere is the hierarchy more strictly observed than among them. For instance, I noticed at M. Noel"s party that the coachmen did not fraternize with their grooms, nor the valets de chambre with the footmen and out-riders, any more than the steward and butler mingled with the scullions; and when M. Barreau cracked a little joke, no matter what it was, it was a pleasure to see how amused his underlings seemed to be. I have no fault to find with these things. Quite the contrary. As our dean used to say: "A society without a hierarchy is a house without a stairway." But the fact seemed to me worth noting in these memoirs.
The party, I need not say, lacked something of its brilliancy until the return of its fairest ornaments, the ladies who had gone to look after little Tom; ladies" maids with glossy, well-oiled hair, housekeepers in beribboned caps, negresses, governesses, among whom I at once acquired much prestige, thanks to my respectable appearance and the nickname "my uncle" which the youngest of those attractive females were pleased to bestow upon me. I tell you there was no lack of second-hand finery, silk and lace, even much faded velvet, eight-b.u.t.ton gloves cleaned several times and perfumery picked up on Madame"s toilet-table; but their faces were happy, their minds given over to gayety, and I had no difficulty in forming a very lively little party in one corner--always perfectly proper, of course--that goes without saying--and entirely befitting a person in my position. But that was the general tone of the occasion. Not until toward the close of the collation did I hear any of the unseemly remarks, any of the scandalous anecdotes that amuse the gentlemen of our council so highly; and it gives me pleasure to state that Bois-l"Hery the coachman, to cite no other instance, is very differently brought up from Bois-l"Hery the master.
M. Noel alone, by his familiar tone and the freedom of his repartees, overstepped the limit. There"s a man who does not scruple to call things by their names. For instance, he said to M. Francis, so loud that he could be heard from one end of the salon to the other: "I say, Francis, your old sharper played still another trick on us last week."
And as the other threw out his chest with a dignified air, M. Noel began to laugh. "No offence, old girl. The strong box is full. You"ll never get to the bottom of it." And it was then that he told us about the loan of fifteen millions I mentioned above.
Meanwhile I was surprised to see no signs of preparation for the supper mentioned on the invitations, and I expressed my anxiety in an undertone to one of my lovely nieces, who replied:
"We are waiting for M. Louis."
"M. Louis?"
"What! Don"t you know M. Louis, the Duc de Mora"s valet de chambre?"
Thereupon I was enlightened on the subject of that influential personage, whose good offices are sought by prefects, senators, even by ministers, and who evidently makes them pay roundly for them, for, with his salary of twelve hundred francs from the duke, he has saved enough to have an income of twenty-five thousand francs, has his daughters at the boarding-school of the Sacred Heart, his son at Bourdaloue College, and a chalet in Switzerland to which the whole family go for the vacation.
At that juncture the personage in question arrived; but there was nothing in his appearance that would have led me to guess his position, which has not its like in Paris. No majesty in his bearing, a waistcoat b.u.t.toned to the chin, a mean, insolent manner, and a fashion of speaking without opening his lips, very unpleasant to those who are listening to him.
He saluted the company with a slight nod, offered a finger to M. Noel, and there we sat, staring at each other, congealed by his grand manners, when a door was thrown open at the end of the room and the supper made its appearance--all kinds of cold meats, pyramids of fruit, bottles of every shape, beneath the glare of two candelabra.
"Now, messieurs, escort the ladies."
In a moment we were in our places, the ladies seated, with the oldest or most important of us men, the others standing, pa.s.sing dishes, chattering, drinking out of all the gla.s.ses, picking a mouthful from every plate. I had M. Francis for my neighbor, and I was obliged to listen to his spiteful remarks against M. Louis, of whom he is jealous because he has such a fine situation in comparison with that he himself holds in his played-out n.o.bleman"s household.
"He"s a parvenu," he said to me in an undertone. "He owes his fortune to his wife, to Madame Paul."
It seems that this Madame Paul is a housekeeper who has been twenty years in the duke"s service, and who understands, as no one else does, how to make a certain pomade for certain infirmities that he has. Mora cannot do without her. Remarking that fact, M. Louis paid his court to the old woman, married her, although he is much younger than she; and, in order not to lose his nurse _aux pommades_, His Excellency took the husband for his valet de chambre. In my heart, notwithstanding what I may have said to M. Francis, I considered that marriage perfectly proper and in conformity with the healthiest morality, as both the mayor and the cure had a hand in it. Moreover, that excellent repast, consisting of choice and very expensive dishes which I did not even know by name, had disposed my mind to indulgence and good humor. But everybody was not in the same mood, for I heard M. Barreau"s baritone voice on the other side of the table, grumbling:
"Why does he meddle? Do I stick my nose into his business? In the first place, it"s a matter that concerns Bompain, not him. And what does it amount to? What is it that he finds fault with me for? The butcher sends me five baskets of meat every morning. I use only two and sell the other three. Where"s the chef who doesn"t do that? As if he wouldn"t do better to keep an eye on the big leakage above stairs, instead of coming and spying about my bas.e.m.e.nt. When I think that the first-floor clique has smoked twenty-eight thousand francs" worth of cigars in three months! Twenty-eight thousand francs! Ask Noel if I lie. And on the second floor, in Madame"s apartments, there"s a fine mess of linen, dresses thrown aside after one wearing, jewels by the handful, and pearls so thick that you crush "em as you walk. Oh! you just wait a bit, and I"ll take a twist on that little fellow."
I understood that he was talking about M. de Gery, the Nabob"s young secretary, who often comes to the _Territoriale_, where he does nothing but rummage among the books. Very polite certainly, but a very proud youngster who does not know how to make the most of himself.
There was nothing but a chorus of maledictions against him around the table. Even M. Louis delivered himself on that subject, with his high and mighty air:
"Our cook, my dear Monsieur Barreau, has recently had an experience similar to yours with His Excellency"s chief secretary, who presumed to indulge in some observations concerning the household expenses. The cook ran up to the duke"s study post-haste, in his professional costume, and said, with his hand on his ap.r.o.n string: "Your Excellency may choose between Monsieur and me." The duke did not hesitate. One can find as many secretaries as one wants; whereas the good cooks are all known. There are just four in Paris. I include you, my dear Barreau. We dismissed our chief secretary, giving him a prefecture of the first cla.s.s as a consolation; but we kept our chief cook."
"Ah! that"s the talk," said M. Barreau, who was delighted to hear that anecdote. "That"s what it is to be in a great n.o.bleman"s service. But parvenus are parvenus, what do you expect?"
"And Jansoulet is nothing more than that," added M. Francis, pulling down his cuffs. "A man who was once a porter at Ma.r.s.eille."
At that M. Noel bristled up.
"I say there, old Francis, you"re glad enough to have the porter of La Cannebiere pay for your roastings at _bouillotte_ all the same. You won"t find many parvenus like us, who loan millions to kings, and whom great n.o.blemen like Mora don"t blush to receive at their table."
"Oh! in the country," sneered M. Francis, showing his old fangs.
The other rose, red as fire, on the point of losing his temper, but M. Louis made a sign with his hand that he had something to say, and M. Noel at once sat down, putting his hand to his ear, like the rest of us, in order to lose none of the august words.
"It is true," said the great personage, speaking with the ends of his lips and sipping his wine slowly; "it is true that we received the Nabob at Grandbois some weeks ago. Indeed, a very amusing thing happened there. We have a great many mushrooms in the second park, and His Excellency sometimes amuses himself by picking them. At dinner a great dish of mushrooms was served. There was What-d"ye-call-him--Thingamy--What"s-his-name--Marigny, the Minister of the Interior, Monpavon, and your master, my dear Noel. The mushrooms made the round of the table,--they looked very inviting, and the gentlemen filled their plates, all except Monsieur le Duc, who can"t digest them and thought that politeness required him to say to his guests: "Oh! it isn"t that I am afraid of them, you know. They are all right,--I picked them with my own hand."
""_Sapristi!_" said Monpavon, laughingly, "in that case, my dear Auguste, excuse me if I don"t taste them," Marigny, being less at home, looked askance at his plate.
""Why, Monpavon, upon my word, these mushrooms look very healthy. I am really sorry that I am no longer hungry."
"The duke remained perfectly serious.
""Come, Monsieur Jansoulet, I trust that you won"t insult me as they have done. Mush-rooms selected by myself!"