Kirk had known in advance just about what the letter contained, and now laughed aloud. It was so like the old gentleman! Why, he could almost hear him dictating it.
Spurred by his present exhilaration, he wrote an answer, which he read with a good deal of satisfaction before sealing it up.
DEAR DAD,-Your affectionate letter, with the kind offer to take charge of a siding out in the Dakotas, is at hand. I would like to help you along with your business, but "Upward and onward" is my motto, and you"ll have to raise that salary a bit. I am drawing two hundred and twenty-five dollars a month at present, quarters furnished and promotion promised. I have made some good investments, and there are no debts to settle. Enclosed find my last bank statement, which will doubtless prove a great disappointment to you.
If you need a good Master of Transportation, I would be pleased to consider an offer at any time, provided the salary is satisfactory, but your proposal to edit my acquaintances is out of the question. My decency and self respect are doing well, thank you, and I like the climate.
Outside my window a mocking-bird sings nightly, and I have a tame rabbit with ears like a squirrel and baby-blue eyes--also a Jamaican negro boy who, I fear, could not stand our harsh Northern winters.
The salary would have to be about six thousand a year. As always,
Your devoted and obedient son, KIRK.
P.S.--I would not care to locate farther west than Buffalo. My wife might not like it.
"If he survives the first part, that tag line will put him down for the count," mused the writer, with a grin. "And, yet, something tells me he will not embrace my offer. Ah, well!
Promotion is slow." He whistled blithely as he sent Allan off to the post-office.
Kirk lost no time in calling at the bank, but was disappointed to learn that Senor Andres Garavel had left the city for an unexpected business tour of the Provinces and would not return for at least two weeks. At first he was inclined to doubt the truth of this statement, but a casual inquiry from Mrs. Cortlandt confirmed it, and, cursing his luck, he sought distraction where he could most easily find it.
In the days that followed he saw nothing of Gertrudis, but a good deal of Edith Cortlandt. She had redeemed her promise of getting him a good horse-something rare in this country-and he was grateful for the exercise, which came as a welcome relief from his indoor toil. They rode almost daily; he dined at her house, and once again made one of her party at the opera. Soon their old friendly intercourse was going on as if it had never been interrupted.
As for Edith, this unsatisfying, semi-public intimacy came to be quite as much a pain as a pleasure to her. During these past few weeks she had been plunged in a mental turmoil, the signs of which she had concealed with difficulty. She had fought with herself; she had tried to reason; she had marshalled her pride, but all in vain. At last she awoke to the terrifying certainty that she was in love. It had all begun with that moment of impulsive surrender at Taboga. The night following had been terrible to her. In its dark hours she had seen her soul for the first time, and the glimpse she got frightened her. Following this, she became furious with herself, then resentful toward Anthony; next she grew desperate and reckless.
She began to look upon her husband with a quickened curiosity, and found him a stranger. For years she had made allowance for his weaknesses, ignoring them as she ignored his virtues; but never before had he appeared so colorless, so insignificant, above all so alien. She had barely tolerated him hitherto, but now she began to despise him.
If Cortlandt was aware of her change of feeling and its cause, his method of dealing with her showed some keenness. Silent contempt was what she could least endure from him of all men; yet this was just what his manner toward her expressed-if it expressed anything. Beyond those words as they were leaving the island, he had said nothing, had never referred to the incident, had not so much as mentioned Anthony"s name unless forced to do so, and this offended her unreasonably. She caught him regarding her strangely at times with a curious, faltering expression, but he was so icy in his reserve, he yielded so easily to her predominance, that she could divine nothing and turned the more fiercely to her inward struggle. Even if he did suspect, what then? It was no affair of his; she was her own mistress. She had given him all he possessed, she had made a man of him. He was her creature, and had no rights beyond what she chose to give. They saw less and less of each other. He became more formal, more respectfully unhusbandlike. He spent few daylight hours in the house, coming and going as he pleased, frequenting the few clubs of the city, or riding alone.
On more than one occasion he met her and Anthony on their horses.
Only before others, or at their frequent political councils, were they quite the same as they had been.
Of Anthony, on the other hand, she arranged to see more than ever, flattering him by a new deference in her manner, making him feel always at ease with her, watching him vainly for the least sign of awakening desire. In their frequent rides they covered most of the roads about the city, even to the ruins of old Panama. Then they began to explore the by-paths and trails.
One afternoon they turned into an unfrequented road that led off to the jungle from the main highway, walking their horses while they marvelled at the beauty of the foliage. The trail they knew led to a coffee plantation far up among the hills, but it was so little travelled that the verdure brushed them as they went, and in many places they pa.s.sed beneath a roof of branches. Before they had penetrated a quarter of a mile they were in the midst of an unbroken solitude, shut off from the world by a riotous glory of green, yellow, and crimson. They had not spoken for a long time, and were feeling quite content with the pleasant monotony of-- their journey, when they burst out into a rocky glen where a spring of clear water bubbled forth. With a common impulse they reined in; Twenty feet farther on the trail twisted into the screen of verdure and was lost.
"What a discovery!" exclaimed Edith. "Help me down, please, I"m going to drink."
Kirk dismounted and lent her a hand; the horses snorted appreciatively, and stepping forward, thrust their soft muzzles eagerly into the stream, then fell to browsing upon the tender leaves at their shoulders.
Edith quenched her thirst, shook the cramp from her limbs, and said: "Some time we will have to see where this road leads. There may be more surprises beyond." She broke a flower from its stem and fastened it in Kirk"s b.u.t.tonhole, while he gazed down at her with friendly eyes.
"You"re looking awfully well lately," he declared.
Glancing up, she met his gaze and held it for an instant. "It"s the open air and the exercise. I enjoy these rides with you more than I can say." Something in her look gave him a little thrill of embarra.s.sment.
"I think I"ll give Marquis and Gyp their dessert," he said, and, turning aside, began to gather a handful of the greenest leaves.
The instant his eyes were off her, she took the horses by their bridles, swung them about, and with a sharp blow of her riding- crop sent them snorting and clattering down the trail. Kirk wheeled barely in time to see them disappearing.
"Here!" he cried, sharply. "What are you doing?"
"They bolted."
"They"ll hike straight for town. Now I"ll have to chase--" He glanced at her sharply. "Say, why did you do that?"
"Because I wanted to. Isn"t that reason enough?" Her eyes were reckless and her lips white.
"You shouldn"t do a thing like that!" he cried, gruffly. "It"s foolish. Now I"ll have to run them down."
"Oh, you can"t catch them."
"Well, I"ll have a try at it, anyhow." He tossed away his handful of leaves.
"Silly! I did it because I wanted to talk with you."
"Well, those horses wouldn"t overhear."
"Don"t be angry, Kirk. I haven"t seen you alone since that night."
"Taboga?" he said, guiltily. "You"re not going to lecture me again? I"m sorry enough as it is." Never in all his life had he felt more uncomfortable. He could not bring himself to meet her gaze, feeling that his own face must be on fire.
"What a queer chap you are! Am I so unattractive that you really want to rush off after those horses?" He said nothing, and she went on after a moment of hesitation: "I have known men who would have thought it a privilege to be left alone with me like this."
"I--have no doubt."
"You remember, for instance, I told you there was one man at Taboga whom I did not wish to see?"
"Yes--at the sanitarium."
"Well, something like this happened once--with him--and I told Stephen."
"And did you tell Mr. Cortlandt what I did?"
"Do you think I would have come riding with you if I had?" She shook her head. "Kirk, I used to think you were an unusually forward young man, but you"re not very worldly, are you?"
"N-no--yes! I guess I"m as wise as most fellows."
"Sometimes I think you are very stupid."
He began firmly: "See here, Mrs. Cortlandt, you have been mighty good to me, and I"m indebted to you and your husband for a whole lot. I am terribly fond of you both."
She clipped a crimson bloom from its stem with a vicious blow of her crop, then, with eyes fixed upon the fallen flower, broke the awkward pause that followed.
"I suppose," she said, half defiantly, "you know how things are with Stephen and me--everybody must know, I suppose. I have done a lot of thinking lately, and I have made up my mind that the last appeal of what is right or wrong lies with one"s self. I"m not going to care any longer what the world thinks of my actions so long as my own heart justifies them. Happiness--that is what I want, and I will have it--I will have it at any cost. It is my right. Because a woman marries without love, is it right for her to forego love all her life? I think not."
She looked up, and with a change of tone ran on swiftly: "I have studied you for a long time, Kirk. I know the sort of man you are.
I know you better than you know yourself. Very lately I have begun to study myself, too, and I know, at last, the sort of woman I am." She drew near and laid a hand on each shoulder, forcing him to look straight into her eyes. "I am not like most women; I can"t do things by halves; I can"t temporize with vital things; I prefer to experiment, even blindly. I used to think I was born to rule, but I think now that a woman"s only happiness lies in serving; and I used to believe I was contented, when all the time I was waiting for something and didn"t know it. Don"t be silly now; you"re just like every other man."
"I can"t pretend to misunderstand you, although--Listen!" He cut his words short. "Here comes some one."
She turned her head, as from the direction their mounts had taken came the sound of approaching hoots.