It was a printed circular announcing a new development in the charitable work of the Refuge. Subscribers were informed that it had been decided to extend the shelter and the training of the inst.i.tution (thus far devoted to fallen women alone) so as to include dest.i.tute and helpless children found wandering in the streets. The question of the number of children to be thus rescued and protected was left dependent, as a matter of course, on the bounty of the friends of the Refuge, the cost of the maintenance of each child being stated at the lowest possible rate. A list of influential persons who had increased their subscriptions so as to cover the cost, and a brief statement of the progress already made with the new work, completed the appeal, and brought the circular to its end.
The lines traced in pencil (in the matron"s handwriting) followed on the blank page.
"Your letter tells me, my dear, that you would like--remembering your own childhood--to be employed when you return among us in saving other poor children left helpless on the world. Our circular will inform you that I am able to meet your wishes. My first errand this evening in your neighborhood was to take charge of a poor child--a little girl--who stands sadly in need of our care. I have ventured to bring her with me, thinking she might help to reconcile you to the coming change in your life. You will find us both waiting to go back with you to the old home.
I write this instead of saying it, hearing from the servant that you are not alone, and being unwilling to intrude myself, as a stranger, on the lady of the house."
Lady Janet read the penciled lines, as she had read the printed sentences, aloud. Without a word of comment she laid the letter where she had laid the card; and, rising from her seat, stood for a moment in stern silence, looking at Mercy. The sudden change in her which the letter had produced--quietly as it had taken place--was terrible to see. On the frowning brow, in the flashing eyes, on the hardened lips, outraged love and outraged pride looked down on the lost woman, and said, as if in words, You have roused us at last.
"If that letter means anything," she said, "it means you are about to leave my house. There can be but one reason for your taking such a step as that."
"It is the only atonement I can make, madam."
"I see another letter on your lap. Is it my letter?"
"Yes."
"Have you read it?"
"I have read it."
"Have you seen Horace Holmcroft?"
"Yes."
"Have you told Horace Holmcroft--"
"Oh, Lady Janet--"
"Don"t interrupt me. Have you told Horace Holmcroft what my letter positively forbade you to communicate, either to him or to any living creature? I want no protestations and excuses. Answer me instantly, and answer in one word--Yes, or No."
Not even that haughty language, not even those pitiless tones, could extinguish in Mercy"s heart the sacred memories of past kindness and past love. She fell on her knees--her outstretched hands touched Lady Janet"s dress. Lady Janet sharply drew her dress away, and sternly repeated her last words.
"Yes? or No?"
"Yes."
She had owned it at last! To this end Lady Janet had submitted to Grace Roseberry; had offended Horace Holmcroft; had stooped, for the first time in her life, to concealments and compromises that degraded her.
After all that she had sacrificed and suffered, there Mercy knelt at her feet, self-convicted of violating her commands, trampling on her feelings, deserting her house! And who was the woman who had done this?
The same woman who had perpetrated the fraud, and who had persisted in the fraud until her benefactress had descended to become her accomplice.
Then, and then only, she had suddenly discovered that it was her sacred duty to tell the truth!
In proud silence the great lady met the blow that had fallen on her. In proud silence she turned her back on her adopted daughter and walked to the door.
Mercy made her last appeal to the kind friend whom she had offended--to the second mother whom she had loved.
"Lady Janet! Lady Janet! Don"t leave me without a word. Oh, madam, try to feel for me a little! I am returning to a life of humiliation--the shadow of my old disgrace is falling on me once more. We shall never meet again. Even though I have not deserved it, let my repentance plead with you! Say you forgive me!"
Lady Janet turned round on the threshold of the door.
"I never forgive ingrat.i.tude," she said. "Go back to the Refuge."
The door opened and closed on her. Mercy was alone again in the room.
Unforgiven by Horace, unforgiven by Lady Janet! She put her hands to her burning head and tried to think. Oh, for the cool air of the night!
Oh, for the friendly shelter of the Refuge! She could feel those sad longings in her: it was impossible to think.
She rang the bell--and shrank back the instant she had done it. Had _she_ any right to take that liberty? She ought to have thought of it before she rang. Habit--all habit. How many hundreds of times she had rung the bell at Mablethorpe House!
The servant came in. She amazed the man--she spoke to him so timidly: she even apologized for troubling him!
"I am sorry to disturb you. Will you be so kind as to say to the lady that I am ready for her?"
"Wait to give that message," said a voice behind them, "until you hear the bell rung again."
Mercy looked round in amazement. Julian had returned to the library by the dining-room door.
CHAPTER XXIX. THE LAST TRIAL.
THE servant left them together. Mercy spoke first.
"Mr. Gray!" she exclaimed, "why have you delayed my message? If you knew all, you would know that it is far from being a kindness to me to keep me in this house."
He advanced closer to her--surprised by her words, alarmed by her looks.
"Has any one been here in my absence?" he asked.
"Lady Janet has been here in your absence. I can"t speak of it--my heart feels crushed--I can bear no more. Let me go!"
Briefly as she had replied, she had said enough. Julian"s knowledge of Lady Janet"s character told him what had happened. His face showed plainly that he was disappointed as well as distressed.
"I had hoped to have been with you when you and my aunt met, and to have prevented this," he said. "Believe me, she will atone for all that she may have harshly and hastily done when she has had time to think. Try not to regret it, if she has made your hard sacrifice harder still. She has only raised you the higher--she has additionally enn.o.bled you and endeared you in my estimation. Forgive me if I own this in plain words.
I cannot control myself--I feel too strongly."
At other times Mercy might have heard the coming avowal in his tones, might have discovered it in his eyes. As it was, her delicate insight was dulled, her fine perception was blunted. She held out her hand to him, feeling a vague conviction that he was kinder to her than ever--and feeling no more.
"I must thank you for the last time," she said. "As long as life is left, my grat.i.tude will be a part of my life. Let me go. While I can still control myself, let me go!"
She tried to leave him, and ring the bell. He held her hand firmly, and drew her closer to him.
"To the Refuge?" he asked.
"Yes," she said. "Home again!"
"Don"t say that!" he exclaimed. "I can"t bear to hear it. Don"t call the Refuge your home!"
"What else is it? Where else can I go?"