LEVITIES.
At a late celebration of the marriages of two gentlemen, the company being large, respectable, and persons of considerable influence, a motion was made, and unanimously voted, That all Bachelors of the age of thirty, and upwards, should annually make an entertainment for the gentlemen of the place, unless prevented by intermediate marriage. What is very singular, a considerable part of the company were gentlemen of that description, who were unanimous in the resolution.
The next day a respectable company of ladies visited the two brides, and it is said, such of them as were _unmarried_ were highly pleased with the resolution of the preceding day.
+EPITAPH ON Mr. SCRIP.+
Here lies Timothy Scrip, late of "Change Alley, Cornhill, Stockbroker.
During the course of a long life he was diligent, industrious, and indefatigable in the exercise of his profession. He died in the seventieth year of his age, and _died well_, having left behind him a fortune of sixty thousand pounds sterling. It is however much to be regretted, that, _stocks being shut_ at the time of his death, he was not able to make a _transfer_, or carry any part of it to his _account_ in the other world. It was remarked of him, that he was always more solicitous to get the _turn of the day_ to himself, than to do a _good turn_ to his neighbour; and that though he frequently made bargains _for time_, he did not choose to risk any thing _for eternity_. He never gave money to the poor, though offered a very high _premium_, thinking it safer to make _ten per cent._ in the _English funds_, than _ten thousand_ in those of a _foreign country_. For these reasons, though he was always esteemed _a good man_ at Jonathan"s, it is much to be dreaded, that, at the _general settling day_, he will find himself _on the wrong side_, and be forced to _waddle, a lame duck, out of Elysium_.
FROM THE LATIN.
A haughty courtier, meeting in the streets A scholar, him thus insolently greets: Base men to take the wall I ne"er permit; The scholar said, I do--and gave him it.
_For the +New-York Weekly Magazine+._
_THE SENTENCE._
[A continuation of the +Criminal+, from page 359.]
The sun, as usual, had bedecked the east with his golden beams, and the major part of mankind were pleased with the prospect. But the hero of this piece had enjoyed none of its enlivening rays, since he had been exiled from the world, until this morning: The gratings of the locks, and opening of the doors which secured the entrance into his cell, roused him to reflect that perhaps this was the day on which his fate was to be decided: his conjectures were right; he was to be tried this day by the laws of his country.
The attendants on the court had now penetrated into the place of his confinement, and the smith was set to work in loosening his fetters.
Owing to the length of time, and their not being sufficiently large, the skin adhered thereto; and on their being knocked off, it accompanied them. Indeed, if there had been present one disinterested person, he would have inferred that a barbarous punishment, formerly practiced by eastern monarchs, had found entrance into a civilized country.
Being now freed from the galling irons, the culprit, safely guarded by the officers of justice, was in a few minutes conducted before her _impartial_ seat.
In due time, and in the usual form, did the stern dispenser of justice commence the solemn interrogatory of "_Guilty, or not Guilty?_" As the prisoner had duly weighed in his own breast the answer he was to make, in an audible voice he replied in the negative.
----Say not, misjudging mortal, that this unfortunate being was to blame in what he uttered, for truth dropped from his lips. True, indeed, his hand, guided by desperation, had done the deed. Despair, that haggard fiend, actuated every feeling; reason had deserted his breast--The man was entirely annihilated. At this juncture his hand had perpetrated what his heart would have abhorred to have thought on.--Call this not sophistry, ye, who hold to the mild precepts of christianity; consider it well, and then let unbiased reason have its full scope.
The council for the prosecution set forth in its blackest colours the dreadful nature of the crime of murder; and concluded with a.s.suring the jury, that unless they brought the prisoner in guilty, they would act contrary to every law, human and divine.
----The prisoner had no one to speak for him----
The learned Judge proceeded to give his opinion, in which it can truly be said he acted not the _impartial_ part.
A verdict was returned, agreeable to the wish of the court, which being done, sentence was pa.s.sed in usual form, not forgetting, at the close, to entreat the compa.s.sion of the Deity. It seemed to breathe forth pity, but it was only the semblance; and the same Judge had p.r.o.nounced it before this, times out of number.
L. B.
THOUGHTS AND MAXIMS.
The height of happiness, beyond all doubt, is to enjoy in the same person the delights of love, and the pleasures of friendship; and to find in that same person an affectionate wife and a faithful friend; no other felicity comparable to this, can the present life afford: But--let us say no more.
Love is a blind emotion, which does not always suppose merit in its object; yet it is far more flattering to a handsome woman, to be beloved by a man of merit, than to be adored by a fool.
Many women wish to appear lively because they thank it gives them an air of youth and wit; but, vivacity, which is not the result of these, only places folly in a more distinguished point of view.
NEW-YORK.
_MARRIED,_
On Sunday morning the 7th inst. at Staten-Island, by the Rev. Mr.
Birkby, Mr. HENRY FROME, to Miss NANCY BYVANCK, both of that place.
Same time, by the Rev. Mr. Birkby, Mr. ABRAHAM MERRIL, to Miss POLLY LAKE, both of that place.
On Thursday evening the 11th inst. by the Rev. Mr. Miller, PETER HAWES, Esq. to Miss NANCY POST, both of this city.
Same evening, by the Rev. Dr. Linn, Mr. THOMAS WHITFIELD, to Miss EFFE VAN AULEN, both of this city.
On Thursday evening last, by the Rev. Mr. Kuypers, Mr. ELAM WILLIAMS, to Miss CATHARINE BOGERT, both of this city.
On Sunday last, at Jamaica. (L.I.) by the Rev. Mr. Kuypers, Mr. TYSON, of this city, to Miss LETTY RAPPELYE, of Cow-Neck.
On Monday evening last, by the Rev. Mr. Mason, Mr. CHARLES MILLER, to Miss ANN PATTERSON, both of this city.