Right now?
"Um, yes, all right, I said, losing my nerve now we were about to start.
Thomas chuckled.
"Stop that, I said. "Or youll be the one eating it.
He sighed. "Im a horse. We dont eat eggs.
"You ate my Easter egg last year.
"That doesnt count. Pay attention, 007.
There followed pans of water, salt, eggs, simmering, and then she laid a perfectly poached egg on my toast and said, "Your turn.
There followed a period of activity and anxiety and then we threw the pan away. The poached egg was still in it.
"What happened? asked Thomas, as we made our way up the lane to get some fresh air and recover a little.
"Im not sure, I said. "I did everything exactly as Mrs Crisp did, but the egg just wouldnt come out of the pan.
"Yes. Ive never seen an egg spot-weld itself to a pan before.
I shook my head, depressed at my failure.
"It was funny, though. I think my favourite bit was when she seized the pan with both hands and shook it and the yolk went up the wall.
I tried to keep a straight face.
Up on the moors, I sat on a wide flat rock by the stream and watched Thomas run.
He thundered effortlessly up the hill, mane and tail flying, kicking up his heels for the sheer joy of living. I watched his muscles bunch and stretch as he lengthened his stride and galloped along the crest of the hill, a dark silhouette against the blue sky, encapsulating all the grace and power and beauty and freedom I would never know.
While he was gone, I bent over the water and looked for fish. The water was brown but clear. I could see all the way down to the stony bed. There were no fish that I could see.
I thought about the last few days, blinking back tears. No, I wasnt going to cry. That wouldnt help at all.
Thomas reappeared, jumping the stream in one fluid moment. For a moment he was a perfect arc above the water and time stood still. Then he was beside me, blowing in my hair.
I was envious.
"Well, he said. "Maybe one day youll be galloping across the moors, too. But Id rather stopped believing things people were telling me.
"Dont.
"Dont what?
" Dont stop believing. Ever. Without belief, there is no hope. And without hope, there is nothing. Always believe and then youll always have hope.
I stood on tiptoe and gently kissed his nose.
"Shall we get back, or do you want to turn a few somersaults?
"Hey, that would be good, wouldnt it? Imagine the world of show jumping if horses learned to do the Fosbury Flop.
I couldnt help laughing.
We made our way back down the lane, laughing and pushing each other and generally messing about. I was feeling so good that I completely forgot I was married. Until I walked into the kitchen and saw my husband sitting at the table. He was finishing his breakfast. Mrs Crisp was tidying away. The egg yolk was off the wall.
I stopped dead, feeling the laughter drain away. I nodded formally. "Good morning, although it was probably afternoon by now, and walked through into the living room. He followed me in.
"Have you got a minute?
I had more minutes than anyone I knew.
He looked better. Still a bit sh.e.l.l-shocked, but definitely better.
Feeling the need of a business-like setting and the rea.s.surance of my own laptop, I sat at the table by the window. Perhaps he felt the same because he pulled out a chair opposite, pushed aside a ma.s.s of unpaid bills, and placed a small package on the table, saying awkwardly, "I meant to give this to you at our wedding, but I never got the opportunity. Please open it.
The paper was crinkled and there were great lumps of creased sticky tape all over it. Hed wrapped it himself. Hed overdone the tape so it was a bit of a struggle to get into it, but I persevered.
A small watch nestled inside a little black velvet bag. Tiny diamonds glinted around the face and the bracelet was delicately wrought. It looked old and it wasnt in a jewellers presentation box. I looked at him.
"It was my mothers. You have pretty hands. I thought it would look nice. Try it on.
I slipped it over my wrist and it fitted perfectly. I twisted my wrist backwards and forwards, watching light play on the tiny diamonds. It had been his mothers. And hed given it to me.
"Its ... beautiful. Thank you.
He took my hand. "Im sorry.
It was a simple apology, quietly made and meant far more to me than the overwrought utterances of the night before.
"Are we friends again?
I nodded.
"No divorce?
I shook my head.
He said, quietly, "Good, then cleared his throat and got up from the table to look out of the window.
Fortunately, the telephone rang. I heard Mrs Crisp answer it. After a moment, she tapped on the door.
"Do you know where your car is?
"Oh Lord, no. I cant even remember where I left it.
"Well, I dont know where it was, but I know where it is now. That was Miss Bauer. Shes sitting in her office and has just watched your car being towed down the High Street.
He was galvanised into action. Saving your marriage was all very well, but this was his Land Rover. "What?
"Shes still on the phone if you want her.
He grabbed the receiver. "Tanya? When? Where? s.h.i.t. On my way. Mrs C., can you get me a taxi please?
She went out. He grabbed his jacket.
"Jenny, Ive got to rush. Its Friday and I bet theyre closed over the weekend. Ill see you later.
A door slammed and the room was full of the lack of Russell Checkland.
"So, still married, then?
"It would seem so.
"Good or bad?
"G.o.d knows.
"Lets have a look at the watch. Actually, its very pretty. Looks nice on you.
I twisted my wrist again.
"Interesting. Hes had it for years and never given it to Francesca. An idiot, but not a complete idiot.
"Can we not talk about Francesca for a bit?
"Good idea. Whats for lunch?
He turned up about four hours later, tense and sulky and with a large red mark on his cheek. I could tell by the way he was standing that he was still pretty tightly wound. He said nothing for a moment, and then took a deep breath.
I raised an eyebrow. A reluctant grin stretched his face. You had to hand it to him he did have a sense of humour.
"She hit me.
"Who? I asked in bewilderment. Surely not Mrs Pargeter, our last, best hope against motorcar mayhem.
"Tanya. I called in to thank her. The least I could do. And if Id been able to get a word in edgeways, I would have. She no sooner clapped eyes on me than she launched herself from behind her desk, yelled at me in German for about ten minutes, and then thumped me. These Germans really fetch a wallop, you know. Apparently, if I dont pull my stockings up (Im sure she meant socks), anyway, if I dont pull up some item of hosiery then shes going to sort me out properly. She really is the most terrifying woman. I take my hat off to Andrew. Stop laughing. You are my wife and the companion of my bosom and I really expect more from you than giggling at my misfortunes. Im in pain, you know.
" Probably best not to mention thats two women whove hit him in the s.p.a.ce of three days. It only needs you to have a go and hes got the hat-trick.
"And it cost me about four times more than shes worth to get the d.a.m.n thing back again, as well.
"Who, Tanya?
"No, my car, of course. Concentrate, Jenny.
"Sorry.
He sighed. "Shall we have something to eat and a quiet night in? Pretend were a normal couple?
I nodded.
Mrs Crisp regarded the bruise with an expert eye.
"Do you want some steak?
"For internal or external application?
She just smiled.
"Youre enjoying this, arent you?
She smiled again, eyes not quite as unfocused as they usually were at this time of day.
"Dinner is served, Mrs Checkland.
We sat down to our first meal as husband and wife. Russell kept up a constant flow of chatter, almost as if he was trying to keep something at bay with a wall of words. Finally, he drew breath.
"It occurs to me I have amends to make. Would you like to do something nice tomorrow? Shall we go out somewhere? Where would you like to go?
"Rushby, said Thomas instantly. "Lets go and see the sea.
"Id like to go to the ... coast, I said. "Can we go to Rushby?
"Excellent idea. Well have a wander along the beach, see if anything interesting has been washed up a new roof would be good fish and chips for lunch, have a go on the funicular railway, and, if you like, stop somewhere nice on the way back to eat. Good suggestion, wife. Feel free to make more whenever you feel like it.
"Thank you, I said, and the sarcasm wasnt lost on him. He grinned.
His phone rang.
Everyone knew who it was.
He scrabbled in his pocket, dragged it out, looked at the screen, frowned, and put it away again, saying curtly, "Voicemail.
"Well, said Thomas. "Im not happy that she rang, but thrilled he didnt answer it.
"Not now, anyway.
" No, really. That must be the first time ever that hes not taken a call from her. Imagine whats going through what pa.s.ses for her mind. And we have a trip out tomorrow. I like Rushby. I can do my Chariots of Fire thing along the beach. Have you ever seen it? Its very impressive.
"Seriously?
"Yes, why not?
"Its a good job youre invisible.