"I hate him," said Quilp between his teeth, "and have always hated him, for family reasons. Besides, he was an intractable ruffian; otherwise he would have been of use. This fellow is pigeon-hearted and light-headed. I don"t want him any longer. Let him hang or drown--starve--go to the devil."
"By all means, sir," returned Bra.s.s. "When would you wish him, sir, to--ha, ha!--to make that little excursion?"
"When this trial"s over," said Quilp. "As soon as that"s ended, send him about his business."
"It shall be done, sir," returned Bra.s.s; "by all means. It will be rather a blow to Sarah, sir, but she has all her feelings under control. Ah, Mr Quilp, I often think, sir, if it had only pleased Providence to bring you and Sarah together, in earlier life, what blessed results would have flowed from such a union! You never saw our dear father, sir?--A charming gentleman. Sarah was his pride and joy, sir. He would have closed his eyes in bliss, would Foxey, Mr Quilp, if he could have found her such a partner. You esteem her, sir?"
"I love her," croaked the dwarf.
"You"re very good, Sir," returned Bra.s.s, "I am sure. Is there any other order, sir, that I can take a note of, besides this little matter of Mr Richard?"
"None," replied the dwarf, seizing the saucepan. "Let us drink the lovely Sarah."
"If we could do it in something, sir, that wasn"t quite boiling,"
suggested Bra.s.s humbly, "perhaps it would be better. I think it will be more agreeable to Sarah"s feelings, when she comes to hear from me of the honour you have done her, if she learns it was in liquor rather cooler than the last, Sir."
But to these remonstrances, Mr Quilp turned a deaf ear. Sampson Bra.s.s, who was, by this time, anything but sober, being compelled to take further draughts of the same strong bowl, found that, instead of at all contributing to his recovery, they had the novel effect of making the counting-house spin round and round with extreme velocity, and causing the floor and ceiling to heave in a very distressing manner. After a brief stupor, he awoke to a consciousness of being partly under the table and partly under the grate. This position not being the most comfortable one he could have chosen for himself, he managed to stagger to his feet, and, holding on by the admiral, looked round for his host.
Mr Bra.s.s"s first impression was, that his host was gone and had left him there alone--perhaps locked him in for the night. A strong smell of tobacco, however, suggested a new train of ideas, he looked upward, and saw that the dwarf was smoking in his hammock.
"Good bye, Sir," cried Bra.s.s faintly. "Good bye, Sir."
"Won"t you stop all night?" said the dwarf, peeping out. "Do stop all night!"
"I couldn"t indeed, Sir," replied Bra.s.s, who was almost dead from nausea and the closeness of the room. "If you"d have the goodness to show me a light, so that I may see my way across the yard, sir--"
Quilp was out in an instant; not with his legs first, or his head first, or his arms first, but bodily--altogether.
"To be sure," he said, taking up a lantern, which was now the only light in the place. "Be careful how you go, my dear friend. Be sure to pick your way among the timber, for all the rusty nails are upwards.
There"s a dog in the lane. He bit a man last night, and a woman the night before, and last Tuesday he killed a child--but that was in play.
Don"t go too near him."
"Which side of the road is he, sir?" asked Bra.s.s, in great dismay.
"He lives on the right hand," said Quilp, "but sometimes he hides on the left, ready for a spring. He"s uncertain in that respect. Mind you take care of yourself. I"ll never forgive you if you don"t.
There"s the light out--never mind--you know the way--straight on!"
Quilp had slily shaded the light by holding it against his breast, and now stood chuckling and shaking from head to foot in a rapture of delight, as he heard the lawyer stumbling up the yard, and now and then falling heavily down. At length, however, he got quit of the place, and was out of hearing.
The dwarf shut himself up again, and sprang once more into his hammock.
CHAPTER 63
The professional gentleman who had given Kit the consolatory piece of information relative to the settlement of his trifle of business at the Old Bailey, and the probability of its being very soon disposed of, turned out to be quite correct in his prognostications. In eight days"
time, the sessions commenced. In one day afterwards, the Grand jury found a True Bill against Christopher Nubbles for felony; and in two days from that finding, the aforesaid Christopher Nubbles was called upon to plead Guilty or Not Guilty to an Indictment for that he the said Christopher did feloniously abstract and steal from the dwelling-house and office of one Sampson Bra.s.s, gentleman, one Bank Note for Five Pounds issued by the Governor and Company of the Bank of England; in contravention of the Statutes in that case made and provided, and against the peace of our Sovereign Lord the King, his crown and dignity.
To this indictment, Christopher Nubbles, in a low and trembling voice, pleaded Not Guilty; and here, let those who are in the habit of forming hasty judgments from appearances, and who would have had Christopher, if innocent, speak out very strong and loud, observe, that confinement and anxiety will subdue the stoutest hearts; and that to one who has been close shut up, though it be only for ten or eleven days, seeing but stone walls and a very few stony faces, the sudden entrance into a great hall filled with life, is a rather disconcerting and startling circ.u.mstance. To this, it must be added, that life in a wig is to a large cla.s.s of people much more terrifying and impressive than life with its own head of hair; and if, in addition to these considerations, there be taken into account Kit"s natural emotion on seeing the two Mr Garlands and the little Notary looking on with pale and anxious faces, it will perhaps seem matter of no very great wonder that he should have been rather out of sorts, and unable to make himself quite at home.
Although he had never seen either of the Mr Garlands, or Mr Witherden, since the time of his arrest, he had been given to understand that they had employed counsel for him. Therefore, when one of the gentlemen in wigs got up and said "I am for the prisoner, my Lord," Kit made him a bow; and when another gentleman in a wig got up and said "And I"m against him, my Lord," Kit trembled very much, and bowed to him too.
And didn"t he hope in his own heart that his gentleman was a match for the other gentleman, and would make him ashamed of himself in no time!
The gentleman who was against him had to speak first, and being in dreadfully good spirits (for he had, in the last trial, very nearly procured the acquittal of a young gentleman who had had the misfortune to murder his father) he spoke up, you may be sure; telling the jury that if they acquitted this prisoner they must expect to suffer no less pangs and agonies than he had told the other jury they would certainly undergo if they convicted that prisoner. And when he had told them all about the case, and that he had never known a worse case, he stopped a little while, like a man who had something terrible to tell them, and then said that he understood an attempt would be made by his learned friend (and here he looked sideways at Kit"s gentleman) to impeach the testimony of those immaculate witnesses whom he should call before them; but he did hope and trust that his learned friend would have a greater respect and veneration for the character of the prosecutor; than whom, as he well knew, there did not exist, and never had existed, a more honourable member of that most honourable profession to which he was attached. And then he said, did the jury know Bevis Marks? And if they did know Bevis Marks (as he trusted for their own character, they did) did they know the historical and elevating a.s.sociations connected with that most remarkable spot? Did they believe that a man like Bra.s.s could reside in a place like Bevis Marks, and not be a virtuous and most upright character? And when he had said a great deal to them on this point, he remembered that it was an insult to their understandings to make any remarks on what they must have felt so strongly without him, and therefore called Sampson Bra.s.s into the witness-box, straightway.
Then up comes Mr Bra.s.s, very brisk and fresh; and, having bowed to the judge, like a man who has had the pleasure of seeing him before, and who hopes he has been pretty well since their last meeting, folds his arms, and looks at his gentleman as much as to say "Here I am--full of evidence--Tap me!" And the gentleman does tap him presently, and with great discretion too; drawing off the evidence by little and little, and making it run quite clear and bright in the eyes of all present.
Then, Kit"s gentleman takes him in hand, but can make nothing of him; and after a great many very long questions and very short answers, Mr Sampson Bra.s.s goes down in glory.
To him succeeds Sarah, who in like manner is easy to be managed by Mr Bra.s.s"s gentleman, but very obdurate to Kit"s. In short, Kit"s gentleman can get nothing out of her but a repet.i.tion of what she has said before (only a little stronger this time, as against his client), and therefore lets her go, in some confusion. Then, Mr Bra.s.s"s gentleman calls Richard Swiveller, and Richard Swiveller appears accordingly.
Now, Mr Bra.s.s"s gentleman has it whispered in his ear that this witness is disposed to be friendly to the prisoner--which, to say the truth, he is rather glad to hear, as his strength is considered to lie in what is familiarly termed badgering. Wherefore, he begins by requesting the officer to be quite sure that this witness kisses the book, then goes to work at him, tooth and nail.
"Mr Swiveller," says this gentleman to d.i.c.k, when he had told his tale with evident reluctance and a desire to make the best of it: "Pray sir, where did you dine yesterday?"--"Where did I dine yesterday?"--"Aye, sir, where did you dine yesterday--was it near here, sir?"--"Oh to be sure--yes--just over the way."--"To be sure. Yes. Just over the way,"
repeats Mr Bra.s.s"s gentleman, with a glance at the court.--"Alone, sir?"--"I beg your pardon," says Mr Swiveller, who has not caught the question--"Alone, sir?" repeats Mr Bra.s.s"s gentleman in a voice of thunder, "did you dine alone? Did you treat anybody, sir? Come!"--"Oh yes, to be sure--yes, I did," says Mr Swiveller with a smile.--"Have the goodness to banish a levity, sir, which is very ill-suited to the place in which you stand (though perhaps you have reason to be thankful that it"s only that place)," says Mr Bra.s.s"s gentleman, with a nod of the head, insinuating that the dock is Mr Swiveller"s legitimate sphere of action; "and attend to me. You were waiting about here, yesterday, in expectation that this trial was coming on. You dined over the way.
You treated somebody. Now, was that somebody brother to the prisoner at the bar?"--Mr Swiveller is proceeding to explain--"Yes or No, sir,"
cries Mr Bra.s.s"s gentleman--"But will you allow me--"--"Yes or No, sir"--"Yes it was, but--"--"Yes it was," cries the gentleman, taking him up short. "And a very pretty witness YOU are!"
Down sits Mr Bra.s.s"s gentleman. Kit"s gentleman, not knowing how the matter really stands, is afraid to pursue the subject. Richard Swiveller retires abashed. Judge, jury and spectators have visions of his lounging about, with an ill-looking, large-whiskered, dissolute young fellow of six feet high. The reality is, little Jacob, with the calves of his legs exposed to the open air, and himself tied up in a shawl. n.o.body knows the truth; everybody believes a falsehood; and all because of the ingenuity of Mr Bra.s.s"s gentleman.
Then come the witnesses to character, and here Mr Bra.s.s"s gentleman shines again. It turns out that Mr Garland has had no character with Kit, no recommendation of him but from his own mother, and that he was suddenly dismissed by his former master for unknown reasons. "Really Mr Garland," says Mr Bra.s.s"s gentleman, "for a person who has arrived at your time of life, you are, to say the least of it, singularly indiscreet, I think." The jury think so too, and find Kit guilty. He is taken off, humbly protesting his innocence. The spectators settle themselves in their places with renewed attention, for there are several female witnesses to be examined in the next case, and it has been rumoured that Mr Bra.s.s"s gentleman will make great fun in cross-examining them for the prisoner.
Kit"s mother, poor woman, is waiting at the grate below stairs, accompanied by Barbara"s mother (who, honest soul! never does anything but cry, and hold the baby), and a sad interview ensues. The newspaper-reading turnkey has told them all. He don"t think it will be transportation for life, because there"s time to prove the good character yet, and that is sure to serve him. He wonders what he did it for. "He never did it!" cries Kit"s mother. "Well," says the turnkey, "I won"t contradict you. It"s all one, now, whether he did it or not."
Kit"s mother can reach his hand through the bars, and she clasps it-- G.o.d, and those to whom he has given such tenderness, only know in how much agony. Kit bids her keep a good heart, and, under pretence of having the children lifted up to kiss him, prays Barbara"s mother in a whisper to take her home.
"Some friend will rise up for us, mother," cried Kit, "I am sure. If not now, before long. My innocence will come out, mother, and I shall be brought back again; I feel confidence in that. You must teach little Jacob and the baby how all this was, for if they thought I had ever been dishonest, when they grew old enough to understand, it would break my heart to know it, if I was thousands of miles away.--Oh! is there no good gentleman here, who will take care of her!"
The hand slips out of his, for the poor creature sinks down upon the earth, insensible. Richard Swiveller comes hastily up, elbows the bystanders out of the way, takes her (after some trouble) in one arm after the manner of theatrical ravishers, and, nodding to Kit, and commanding Barbara"s mother to follow, for he has a coach waiting, bears her swiftly off.
Well; Richard took her home. And what astonishing absurdities in the way of quotation from song and poem he perpetrated on the road, no man knows. He took her home, and stayed till she was recovered; and, having no money to pay the coach, went back in state to Bevis Marks, bidding the driver (for it was Sat.u.r.day night) wait at the door while he went in for "change."
"Mr Richard, sir," said Bra.s.s cheerfully, "Good evening!"
Monstrous as Kit"s tale had appeared, at first, Mr Richard did, that night, half suspect his affable employer of some deep villany. Perhaps it was but the misery he had just witnessed which gave his careless nature this impulse; but, be that as it may, it was very strong upon him, and he said in as few words as possible, what he wanted.
"Money?" cried Bra.s.s, taking out his purse. "Ha ha! To be sure, Mr Richard, to be sure, sir. All men must live. You haven"t change for a five-pound note, have you sir?"
"No," returned d.i.c.k, shortly.
"Oh!" said Bra.s.s, "here"s the very sum. That saves trouble. You"re very welcome I"m sure.--Mr Richard, sir--" d.i.c.k, who had by this time reached the door, turned round.
"You needn"t," said Bra.s.s, "trouble yourself to come back any more, Sir."
"Eh?"
"You see, Mr Richard," said Bra.s.s, thrusting his hands in his pockets, and rocking himself to and fro on his stool, "the fact is, that a man of your abilities is lost, Sir, quite lost, in our dry and mouldy line.
It"s terrible drudgery--shocking. I should say, now, that the stage, or the--or the army, Mr Richard--or something very superior in the licensed victualling way--was the kind of thing that would call out the genius of such a man as you. I hope you"ll look in to see us now and then. Sally, Sir, will be delighted I"m sure. She"s extremely sorry to lose you, Mr Richard, but a sense of her duty to society reconciles her. An amazing creature that, sir! You"ll find the money quite correct, I think. There"s a cracked window sir, but I"ve not made any deduction on that account. Whenever we part with friends, Mr Richard, let us part liberally. A delightful sentiment, sir!"
To all these rambling observations, Mr Swiveller answered not one word, but, returning for the aquatic jacket, rolled it into a tight round ball: looking steadily at Bra.s.s meanwhile as if he had some intention of bowling him down with it. He only took it under his arm, however, and marched out of the office in profound silence. When he had closed the door, he re-opened it, stared in again for a few moments with the same portentous gravity, and nodding his head once, in a slow and ghost-like manner, vanished.