Ferdy did not much like the strange doctor, though he meant to be very kind, no doubt. He spoke to him too much as if he were a baby, and the boy was beginning at last to feel less restless and more comfortably sleepy when this new visitor came. And then the library lamp was brought up, and it blinked into his eyes, and he hated being turned round and having his backbone poked at, as he told Chrissie, though he couldn"t exactly say that it hurt him. And, worst of all, when he asked if he might get up "to-morrow" the strange doctor "put him off" in what Ferdy thought a silly sort of way. He would much rather have been told right out, "No, certainly not to-morrow," and then he could have begun settling up things in his mind and planning what he would do, as Chrissie and he always did if they knew a day in bed was before them; for they had never been very ill--never ill enough to make no plans and feel as if they cared for nothing in bed or out of it.
No, Ferdy was quite sure he liked Mr. Stern much better than Dr. Bigge, for, curiously enough, that was the great doctor"s name, though by rights, as he was a very clever surgeon and not a physician, I suppose he should not be called "doctor" at all.
When at last he had gone, Mr. Stern came back for a moment to tell Ferdy"s mother and Flowers how it would be best to settle him for the night. They put the pillows in rather a funny way, he thought, but still he was pretty comfortable, and he began to feel a little sleepy again; and just as he was going to ask his mother what they were doing with the sofa, everything went out of his head, and he was off into the peaceful country of sleep, where his troubles were all forgotten, hushed into quiet by the soft waving wings of the white angel, whose presence is never so welcome as to the weary and suffering.
When he woke next there was a faint light in the room. For a moment or two he thought that it was the daylight beginning to come, and he looked towards where the window was in his own little room; but even the tiny motion of his head on the pillow sent a sort of ache through him, and that made him remember.
No, he was not in his own room, and the glimmer was not that of the dawn. It was from a shaded night-light in one corner, and as his eyes grew used to it he saw that there was some one lying on the sofa--some one with bright brown hair, bright even in the faint light, and dressed in a pale pink dressing-gown. It was mamma. Poor mamma, how uncomfortable for her not to be properly in bed! Why was she lying there? He hoped she was asleep, and yet--he almost hoped she wasn"t, or at least that she would awake just for a minute, for he was thirsty and hot, and the fidgety feeling that he _couldn"t_ keep still was beginning again. He did not know that he sighed or made any sound, but he must have done so, for in another moment the pink dressing-gown started up from the sofa, and then mamma"s pretty face, her blue eyes still looking rather "dusty," as the children called it, with sleep, was anxiously bending over him.
[Ill.u.s.tration: "WHAT IS IT, DEAR? DID YOU CALL ME?"]
"What is it, dear? Did you call me?"
"No, mamma. But why aren"t you in bed, and why is there a light in the room? Aren"t you going to bed?"
"Yes, in an hour or two Flowers will come and take my place. You see we thought you might be thirsty in the night, and the doctor said you mustn"t move."
"I _am_ thirsty," said Ferdy. "I"d like a drink of water."
"Better than lemonade? There is some nice fresh lemonade here."
Ferdy"s eyes brightened.
"Oh, I _would_ like that best, but I didn"t know there was any."
Mamma poured some out into such a funny cup--it had a pipe, so Ferdy called it, at one side. He didn"t need to sit up, or even to lift his head, to drink quite comfortably.
"And I think," Mrs. Ross went on, "I think I will give you another spoonful of the medicine. It is not disagreeable to take, and it will help you to go to sleep again."
Yes, it did; very, very soon he was asleep again. This time he dreamt something, though when he awoke he could not clearly remember what. He only knew that it was something about birds. He lay with his eyes shut thinking about it for a few minutes, till a sound close to him made him open them and look round. It was morning, quite morning and daylight, and from the window came the gentle twittering of some swallows, who had evidently taken up their summer quarters in some corner hard by.
"That must have been what made me dream about birds," said Ferdy to himself, though he spoke aloud without knowing it. "I must have heard them in my sleep."
"You have had a nice sleep," said a voice from the other side of his bed, and, looking towards her, Ferdy saw Flowers, already dressed and with a pleasant smile on her face. "Are you feeling better, Master Ferdy, dear?"
The little boy waited a moment or two before he replied.
"My head isn"t so sore, and I"m not so tired, but I don"t think I want to get up even if I might. I want Chrissie to come and sit beside me.
What o"clock is it, Flowers?"
"Just six o"clock, sir. You will have to wait a little before Miss Christine can come. I daresay she"s tired, poor dear, and she may sleep late this morning; perhaps you will be able to sleep a little more yourself, Master Ferdy. Would you like a drink of milk?"
"Yes," said Ferdy, "I would like some milk, but I can"t go to sleep again; I"ve too much on my mind," with a deep sigh.
He spoke in such an "old-fashioned" way that, sorry as the maid was for him, she could scarcely help smiling a little. She gave him the milk and lifted him very, very gently a little farther on to the pillows.
"Does it hurt you, Master Ferdy?" she asked anxiously.
"N--no, I don"t think so," he replied; "but I feel all queer. I believe all my bones have got put wrong, and p"r"aps they"ll never grow right again."
"Never"s a long word, my dear," said Flowers cheerfully. The truth was she scarcely knew what to say, and she was glad to turn away and busy herself with some little tidying up at the other side of the room.
Ferdy lay still, almost forgetting he was not alone in the room, for Flowers was very quiet. His eyes strayed to the window, where another lovely sunshiny morning was gilding again the world of trees, and gra.s.s, and blossom with renewed beauty. It was all so very like yesterday morning, all "except me," thought Ferdy, so terribly like his birthday morning, when he had been so happy, oh! so happy, that it had been difficult to believe in unhappiness anywhere. And yet even then he had thought of unhappiness. It was queer that he had. What had put it into his head? He remembered it all--wondering how very poor, or very old, or very suffering people, cripples, for instance, could be happy. And yet he had seen some that really seemed so.
"Cripples"--that word had never come into his mind in the same way before. He had never thought what it really meant. Supposing _he_ were to be a cripple? Was it for fear of that that the doctor would not let him get up? Ferdy moved his legs about a very little; they did not hurt him, only they felt weak and heavy, and he had a kind of shrinking from the idea of standing, or even of sitting up in bed.
Was that how cripples felt? He wished somebody would tell him, but it was no use asking Flowers--most likely she did not know. And he didn"t think he would like to ask his mother; she looked so pale and tired, and it might make her cry if he spoke about being a cripple. He thought he might ask Chrissie, perhaps. She was only a little girl, but she was very sensible, and he could speak to her without being so afraid of making her cry as if it was mamma--or rather, if she did cry, he wouldn"t mind quite so much.
He wished Chrissie would come. Only six o"clock Flowers had said, not so very long ago. It couldn"t be more than half-past six yet. What a pity it was that people, boys and girls any way, can"t get up like the birds, just when it gets nice and light! What a chatter and twitter those birds outside were making--he had never noticed them so much before. But then, to be sure, he had never slept in the oriel room before. He wondered if they were the same swallows that were there last year, and every year.
"If they are," thought Ferdy, "I should think they must have got to know us. I wish they could talk to us and tell us stories of all the places they see when they are travelling. What fun it would be! I"ll ask Chrissie if she"s ever thought about it. I wonder if we couldn"t ever get to--under--stand--"
But here the thread of his wonderings was suddenly snapped. Ferdy had fallen asleep again.
A minute or two after, Flowers stepped softly across the room and stood beside the bed looking down at him.
"Poor dear," she said to herself, "he does look sweet lying there asleep. And to see him as he is now, no one would think there was anything the matter with him. Oh dear, I do hope it won"t turn out so bad as the doctors fear."
CHAPTER IV
WHAT THE SWALLOWS THOUGHT OF IT
Thanks to the extra sleep which had come to Ferdy after all, he had not long to wait for Chrissie once he had wakened up "for good." She was not allowed to see him till he had had his breakfast, for it was very important to keep up his strength with nourishing food, and "if you begin talking together, you know," said mamma, "Ferdy would get interested and excited, and very likely not feel inclined to eat anything. That is even the way sometimes when you are both quite well."
She was speaking to Chrissie about how careful she must be, if she were to be trusted to be with her brother, not to seem sad or dull, and yet to be very quiet--"quietly cheerful, dear," she went on, "and if Ferdy is at all cross or peevish, you must just not mind."
Chrissie looked up in surprise. Ferdy cross or peevish seemed impossible.
"He never is, mamma dear," she said. "If ever we have little quarrels, it is almost always more my fault than his," which was quite true.
"Yes," her mother replied, "but you don"t know, Chrissie, how illness changes people. Ferdy never has been seriously ill in his life, and--and this sad accident is sure to tell on his nerves." She had been doing her best to speak cheerfully, but now her voice broke, and the tears came into her eyes, already worn and tired-looking with the long hours of anxiety.
Chrissie stroked her hand gently. Then she said, though hesitating a little, "Mamma darling, won"t you tell me more about Ferdy--about what the doctors think, I mean. I promise you I will not let him find out anything you don"t want him to know. I will be very brave and--and cheerful, but I would so like to know. It isn"t that he"s not going to get better--that he"s going to get _worse_?"
"No, dear, not that," said Mrs. Ross, drying her eyes as she spoke. "He is a strong child, and his general health is good, but his back is injured badly. That is the reason we are so anxious. He may get _better_. The doctors think that in a few weeks he will be able to be up and dressed and to lie on a couch, but they cannot say if he will ever be _quite_ right again. I am afraid they do not think he ever will."
"Oh, mamma," said Chrissie.
Mrs. Ross looked at her anxiously; she wondered if she had done wrong in telling her so much. And the little girl guessed what she was thinking.
"I would much rather know, mamma," she said, "much rather. It will make me more careful when I am with dear Ferdy, and if he ever is the least cross, I won"t mind. I will try to amuse him nicely. Are you going to tell Miss Lilly, mamma?"
"Oh yes, I am hoping that she will be a great help. I will see her this morning as soon as she comes."
"Are we to do any lessons to-day?" asked Chrissie. "Is Ferdy to do lessons in bed?"