The Parish Clerk

Chapter 18

In the same town great excitement used to attend the election of the mayor on 29 August in each year. Before the election the corporation attended service in the parish church, and the clerk on these occasions gave out for singing "the first two staves of the fifteenth Psalm:

"Lord, who"s the happy man," etc.

The pa.s.sing of the Munic.i.p.al Act changed the manner and time of the election, but it did not take away the interest felt in the event. As long as Tate and Brady"s version of the Psalms was used in the church, that is until the year 1840, these "two staves" were annually sung on the Sunday preceding the election[74].

[Footnote 74: _Ibid._, p. 23.]

In these days of reverent worship it seems hardly possible that the beautiful expressions in the psalms of praise to Almighty G.o.d should ever have been prost.i.tuted to the baser purposes of private gain or munic.i.p.al elections.

Sleepy times and sleepy clerks--and yet these were not always sleepy; in fact, far too lively, riotous, and unruly. At least, so the poor rector of Hayes found them in the middle of the eighteenth century. Such conduct in church is scarcely credible as that which was witnessed in this not very remote parish church in not very remote times. The registers of the parish of Hayes tell the story in plain language. On 18 March, 1749, "the clerk gave out the 100th Psalm, and the singers immediately opposed him, and sung the 15th, and bred a disturbance. _The clerk then ceased_." Poor man, what else could he have done, with a company of brawling, bawling singers shouting at him from the gallery!

On another occasion affairs were worse, the ringers and others disturbing the service, from the beginning of the service to the end of the sermon, by ringing the bells and going into the gallery to spit below. On another occasion a fellow came into church with a pot of beer and a pipe, and remained smoking in his pew until the end of the sermon[75]. _O tempora! O mores!_ as some disconsolate clergymen wrote in their registers when the depravity of the times was worse than usual.

The slumbering congregation of Hogarth"s picture would have been a comfort to the distracted parson.

[Footnote 75: _Antiquary_, vol. xviii, p. 65. Quoted in _Social Life as told by Parish Registers_, p. 54.]

To prevent people from sleeping during the long sermons a special officer was appointed, in order to banish slumber when the parson was long in preaching. This official was called a sluggard-waker, and was usually our old friend the parish clerk with a new t.i.tle. Several persons, perhaps reflecting in their last moments on all the good advice which they had missed through slumbering during sermon time, have bequeathed money for the support of an officer who should perambulate the church, and call to attention any one who, through sleep, was missing the preacher"s timely admonition. Richard Dovey, of Farmcote, in 1659 left property at Claverley, Shropshire, with the condition that eight shillings should be paid to, and a room provided for, a poor man, who should undertake to awaken sleepers, and to whip out dogs from the church of Claverley during divine service[76].

[Footnote 76: _Old English Customs and Curious Bequests_, S.H. Edwards (1842), p. 220.]

John Rudge, of Trysull, Staffordshire, left a like bequest to a poor man to go about the parish church of Trysull during sermon to keep people awake, and to keep dogs out of church[77]. Ten shillings a year is paid by a tenant of Sir John Bridges, at Chislett, Kent, as a charge on lands called Dog-whipper"s Marsh, to a person for keeping order in the church during service[78], and from time immemorial an acre of land at Peterchurch, Herefordshire, was appropriated to the use of a person for keeping dogs out of church, such person being appointed by the minister and churchwardens.

[Footnote 77: _Ibid._, p. 221.]

[Footnote 78: _Ibid._, p. 222.]

Mr. W. Andrews, Librarian of the Hull Inst.i.tute, has collected in his _Curiosities of the Church_ much information concerning sluggard-wakers and dog-whippers. The clerk in one church used a long staff, at one end of which was a fox"s brush for gently arousing a somnolent female, while at the other end was a k.n.o.b for a more forcible awakening of a male sleeper. The Dunchurch sluggard-waker used a stout wand with a fork at the end of it. During the sermon he stepped stealthily up and down the nave and aisles and into the gallery marking down his prey. And no one resented his forcible awakenings.

The sluggard-waker and dog-whipper appear in many old churchwardens"

account-books. Thus in the accounts of Barton-on-Humber there is an entry for the year 1740: "Paid Brocklebank for waking sleepers 2 s. 0."

At Castleton the officer in 1722 received 10 s. 0[79]. The clerk in his capacity of dog-whipper had often arduous duties to perform in the old dale churches of Yorkshire when farmers and shepherds frequently brought their dogs to church. The animals usually lay very quietly beneath their masters" seat, but occasionally there would be a scrimmage and fight, and the clerk"s staff was called into play to beat the dogs and produce order.

[Footnote 79: The reader will find numerous entries relating to this subject in the work of Mr. W. Andrews to which I have referred.]

Why dogs should have been ruthlessly and relentlessly whipped out of churches I can scarcely tell. The Highland shepherd"s dog usually lies contentedly under his master"s seat during a long service, and even an archbishop"s collie, named Watch, used to be very still and well-behaved during the daily service, only once being roused to attention and a stately progress to the lectern by the sound of his master"s voice reading the verse "I say unto all, Watch." But our ancestors made war against dogs entering churches. In mediaeval and Elizabethan times such does not seem to have been the case, as one of the duties of the clerks in those days was to make the church clean from the "shomeryng of dogs."

The nave of the church was often used for secular purposes, and dogs followed their masters. Mastiffs were sometimes let loose in the church to guard the treasures, and I believe that I am right in stating that chancel rails owe their origin to the presence of dogs in churches, and were erected to prevent them from entering the sanctuary. Old Scarlett bears a dog-whip as a badge of his office, and the numerous bequests to dog-whippers show the importance of the office.

Nor were dogs the only creatures who were accustomed to receive chastis.e.m.e.nt in church. The clerk was usually armed with a cane or rod, and woe betide the luckless child who talked or misbehaved himself during service. Frequently during the course of a long sermon the sound of a cane (the Tottenham clerk had a split cane which made no little noise when used vigorously) striking a boy"s back was heard and startled a sleepy congregation. It was all quite usual. No one objected, or thought anything about it, and the sermon proceeded as if nothing had happened. Paul Wootton, clerk at Bromham, Wilts, seventy years ago performed various duties during the service, taking his part in the gallery among the performers as ba.s.s, flute serpent, an instrument unknown now, etc., p.r.o.nouncing his Amen _ore rotundo_ and during the sermon armed with a long stick sitting among the children to preserve order. If any one of the small creatures felt that _opere in longo fas est obrepere somnum_, the long stick fell with unerring whack upon the urchin"s head. When Mr. Stracey c.l.i.therow went to his first curacy at Skeyton, Norfolk, in 1845, he found the clerk sweeping the whole chancel clear of snow which had fallen through the roof. The font was of wood painted orange and red. The singers sat within the altar rails with a desk for their books inside the rails. There was a famous old clerk, named Bird, who died only a year or two ago, aged ninety, and, as Mr.

c.l.i.therow informed Bishop Stanley, was the best man in the parish, and was well worthy of that character.

Even in London churches unfortunate events happened, and somnolent clerks were not confined to the country. A correspondent remembers that in 1860, when St. Martin"s-in-the-Fields was closed for the purpose of redecorating, his family migrated to St. Matthew"s Chapel, Spring Gardens (recently demolished), where one hot Sunday evening one of the curates of St. Martin"s was preaching, and in the course of his sermon said that it was the duty of the laity to pray that G.o.d would "endue His ministers with righteousness." The clerk was at the moment sound asleep, but suddenly aroused by the familiar words, which acted like a bugle call to a slumbering soldier, he at once slid down on the ha.s.sock at his feet and uttered the response "And make Thy chosen people joyful." My informant remarks that the "chosen people" who were present became "joyful" to an unseemly degree, in spite of strenuous efforts to restrain their feelings.

Sometimes the clerk was not the only sleeper. A tenor soloist of Wednesbury Old Church eighty years ago used to tell the story of the vicar of Wednesbury, who one very sultry afternoon retired into the vestry, which was under the western tower, to don his black gown while a hymn was being sung by the expectant congregation. The hymn having been sung through, and the preacher not having returned to ascend the pulpit, the clerk gave out the last verse again. Still no parson. Then he started the hymn, directing it to be sung all through again; but still the vicar returned not. At last in desperation he gave out that they "would now sing," etc. etc., the 119th Psalm. Mercifully before they had all sunk back into their seats exhausted the long-lost parson made his hurried reappearance. The poor old gentleman had dropped into an arm-chair in the vestry, and overcome by the heat had fallen soundly asleep. As to the clerk, he could not leave his seat to go in search of him; there was no precedent for both vicar and clerk to be away from the three-decker before the service was brought to a close.

The old clerk is usually intensely loyal to the Church and to his clergyman, but there have been some exceptions. An example of a disloyal clerk comes from the neighbourhood of Barnstaple.

A parish clerk, apparently religious and venerable, held his position in a village church in that district for thirty years. He carried out his duties with regularity and thoroughness equalled only by the parish priest. This old clerk would frequently make remarks--not altogether pleasing--about Nonconformists, whom he summed up as a lot of "mithudy nuzenses" (methodist nuisances).

A new rector came and brought with him new ideas. The parish clerk would not be required for the future. As soon as the old clerk heard this he attached himself to a local dissenting body and joined with them to worship in their small chapel. This, after thirty years" service in the Church and a bitter feeling against Nonconformists, is rather remarkable.

In the forties there was a sleepy clerk at Hampstead, a very portly man, who did ample justice to his bright red waistcoat and bra.s.s b.u.t.tons. The church had a model old-time three-decker. The lower deck was occupied by the clerk, the upper deck by the reader, and the quarter-deck by the preacher. The clerk, during the sermon, would often fall asleep and make known his state by a snore. Then the reader would tap his bald head with a hymn-book, whereupon he would wake up and startle the congregation by a loud and prolonged "Ah-men."

We are accustomed now to have our churches beautifully decorated with flowers and fruits and holly and evergreens at the great festivals and harvest thanksgiving services. Sometimes on the latter occasions our decorations are perhaps a little too elaborate, and remind one of a horticultural show. No such charge could be brought against the old-fashioned method of church decoration. Christmas was the only season when it was attempted, and sprigs of holly stuck at the corners of the old square pews in little holes made for the purpose were always deemed sufficient. This was always the duty of the clerk. Later on, when a country church was found to be elaborately decorated for Christmas and the clerk was questioned on the subject, he replied, shaking his head, "Ah! we"re getting a little High Church now." At Langport, Somerset, the pews were similarly adorned on Palm Sunday with sprigs of the catkins from willow trees to represent palms.

I have already mentioned some instances of clerks who were sometimes elated by the dignity of the office and full of conceit. Wesley enjoyed the experience of having a conceited clerk at Epworth, who not only was proud of his singing and other accomplishments, but also of his personal appearance. He delighted to wear Wesley"s old clerical clothes and especially his wig, which was much too big for the insignificant clerk"s head. John Wesley must have had a sense of humour, though perhaps it might have been exhibited in a more appropriate place. However, he was determined to humble his conceited clerk, and said to him one Sunday morning, "John, I shall preach on a particular subject this morning, and shall choose my own psalm, of which I will give out the first line, and you will proceed and repeat the next as usual." When the time for psalmody arrived Wesley gave out, "Like to an owl in ivy bush," and the clerk immediately responded, "That rueful thing am I." The members of the congregation looked up and saw his small head half-buried in his large wig, and could not restrain their smiles. The clerk was mortified and the rector gratified that he should have been taught a lesson and learned to be less vain.

Old-fashioned ways die hard. Only seven years ago the inc.u.mbent of a small Somerset parish found when in the pulpit that he had left his spectacles at home. Casting a shrewd glance around, he perceived just below him, well within reach, one of his parishioners who was wearing a large pair of what in rustic circles are termed "barnacles" tied behind his head. Stretching down, the parson plucked them from the astonished owner"s brow, and, fitting them on his clerical nose, proceeded to deliver his discourse. Thenceforward the clerk, doubtless fearing for his own gla.s.ses, never failed to carry to church a second pair wherewith to supply, if need be, his coadjutor"s shortcomings.

Another and final story of sleepy manners comes to us from the north country. A short-sighted clergyman of what is known as the "old school"

was preaching one winter afternoon to a slumberous congregation. Dusk was falling, the church was badly lighted, and his ma.n.u.script difficult to decipher. He managed to stumble along until he reached a pa.s.sage which he rendered as follows: "Enthusiasm, my brethren, enthusiasm in a good cause is an excellent--excellent quality, but unless it is tempered with judgment, it is apt to lead us--apt to lead us--Here, Thomas,"

handing the sermon to the clerk, "go to the window and see what it is apt to lead us into."

CHAPTER XV

THE CLERK IN ART

The finest portrait ever painted of a parish clerk is that of Orpin, clerk of Bradford-on-Avon, Wilts, whose interesting old house still stands near the grand parish church and the beautiful little Saxon ecclesiastical structure. This picture is the work of Thomas Gainsborough, R.A., and is now happily preserved in the National Gallery. Orpin has a fine and n.o.ble face upon which the sunlight is shining through a window as he turns from the Divine Book to see the glories of the blue sky.

"Some word of life e"en now has met His calm benignant eye; Some ancient promise breathing yet Of immortality.

Some heart"s deep language which the glow Of faith unwavering gives; And every feature says "I know That my Redeemer lives.""

The size of this canvas is four feet by three feet two inches. Orpin is wearing a blue coat, black vest, white neck-cloth, and dark breeches.

His hair is grey and curly, and falls upon his shoulders. He sits on a gilt-nailed chair at a round wooden table, on which is a reading-easel, supporting a large volume bound in dark green, and labelled "Bible, Vol.

I." The background is warm brown.

Of this picture a critic states: "The very n.o.ble character of the worthy old clerk"s head was probably an additional inducement to Gainsborough to paint the picture, Seldom does so fine a subject present itself to the portrait painter, and Gainsborough evidently sought to do justice to his venerable model by unusual and striking effect of lighting, and by more than ordinary care in execution. It might almost seem like impertinence to eulogise such painting, as this canvas contains painting which, unlike the works of Reynolds, seems fresh and pure as the day it left the easel; and it would be still more futile to attempt to define the master"s method."

The history of the portrait is interesting. It was painted at Shockerwick, near Bradford, where Wiltshire, the Bath carrier, lived, who loved art so much that he conveyed to London Gainsborough"s pictures from the year 1761 to 1774 entirely free of charge. The artist rewarded him by presenting him with some of his paintings, _The Return from Harvest, The Gipsies" Repast_, and probably this portrait of Orpin was one of his gifts. It was sold at Christie"s in 1868 by a descendant of the art-loving carrier, and purchased for the nation by Mr. Boxall for the low sum of 325.

The mediaeval clerk appears in many ancient ma.n.u.scripts and illuminations, which show us, better than words can describe, the actual duties which he was called upon to perform. The British Museum possesses a number of pontificals and other ill.u.s.trated ma.n.u.scripts containing artistic representations of clerks. We see him accompanying the priest who is taking the last sacrament to the sick. He is carrying a taper and a bell, which he is evidently ringing as he goes, its tones asking for the prayers of the faithful for the sick man"s soul. This picture occurs in a fourteenth-century MS. [6 E. VI, f. 427], and in the same MS. we see another ill.u.s.tration of the priest administering the last sacrament attended by the clerk [6 E. VII, f. 70].

[Ill.u.s.tration: THE CLERK ATTENDING THE PRIEST AT HOLY BAPTISM]

[Ill.u.s.tration 2: THE CLERK ATTENDING THE PRIEST AT HOLY BAPTISM]

Another ill.u.s.tration shows the priest baptizing an infant which the male sponsor holds over the font, while the priest pours water over its head from a shallow vessel. The faithful parish clerk stands by the priest.

This appears in the fifteenth-century MS. Egerton, 2019, f. 135.

In the MS. of Froissart"s Chronicle there is an ill.u.s.tration of the coronation procession of Charles V of France. The clerk goes before the cross-bearer and the bishop bearing his holy-water vessel and his sprinkler for the purpose of aspersing the spectators. We have already given two ill.u.s.trations taken from a fourteenth-century MS. in the British Museum, which depict the clerk, as the _aquaebajalus_, entering the lord"s house and going first into the kitchen to sprinkle the cook with holy water, and then into the hall to perform a like duty to the lord and lady as they sit at dinner.

There is a fine picture in a French pontifical of the fifteenth century, which is in the British Museum (Tiberius, B. VIII, f. 43), of the anointing and coronation of a king of France. An ecclesiastical procession is represented meeting the king and his courtiers at the door of the cathedral of Rheims, and amongst the dignitaries we see the clerk bearing the holy-water vessel, the cross-bearer, and the thurifer swinging his censer. The clerk wears a surplice over a red tunic.

One other of these mediaeval representations of the clerk"s duties may be mentioned. It is a fifteenth-century French MS. in the British Museum (Egerton, 2019, f. 142), and represents the last scenes of this mortal life. The absolution of the penitent, the administration of the last sacrament, the woman mourning for her husband and arranging the grave-clothes, the singing of the dirige, the burial, and the reception of the soul of the departed by our Lord in glory. The clerk appears in several of these scenes. He is kneeling behind the priest in the administration of the last sacrament. Robed in surplice and cope he is chanting the Psalms for the departed, and at the burial he is holding the holy-water vessel for the asperging of the corpse.

There are several paintings by English artists which represent the old-fashioned clerk in all his glory in his throne in the lowest seat of the "three-decker." Perhaps the most striking is the satirical sketch of the pompous eighteenth-century clerk as shown in Hogarth"s engraving of _The Sleeping Congregation_, to which I have already referred. As a contrast to Hogarth"s _Sleeping Congregation_ we may place Webster"s famous painting of a village choir, which is thoroughly life-like and inspiring. The old clerk with enrapt countenance is singing l.u.s.tily. The musicians are performing on the "cello, clarionet, and hautboy, and the singers are chanting very earnestly and very vigorously the strains of some familiar melody. The picture is a very exact presentment of an old village choir of the better sort.

[Ill.u.s.tration: THE DUTIES OF A CLERK AT A DEATH AND FUNERAL]

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