*beep* *beep*I woke up with a bright white light shining in my face. I couldn"t see anything else, but the color of white everywhere.
The torpidness through my body was the only thing I could feel.
Had I died? Is that what it felt like to be a ghost like others? Could I now see Cansu or The Voice? And, about the Librarian; could I find him there?
Suddenly, I began feeling something near my stomach and my right arm. My vision began clearing up. Instead of a pure white, I also began seeing some greenish colors.
I slowly began feeling my entire body.
The colors slowly became more contrasted, and I could see the imperfections of the tiles on the ceiling. I was wrong; I was not dead. This was a hospital room.
"Hold on, hold on, release!" I heard someone. "He is waking up."
I felt some pain on my arm. I tried to move it, but I couldn"t.
"Don"t move!" someone said. I couldn"t see him. "Hold still."
I couldn"t comprehend the warning at first. I tried to look around, but I could barely move my head around. Someone came into my vision from below. He was a middle aged man; he had a white mask on his face and a bonnet on his hair. He was a surgeon in a green uniform. The uniform had some blood stains on it. He looked into my eyes for a few seconds, and turned around to call for someone.
"Quickly now." he said and made a hand gesture. I couldn"t see who he was talking to.
Just then, another person came into my vision. While I was trying to look around, she held my head. She took away the mask on my face and placed it again carefully. Until then, I wasn"t even aware of the mask myself.
I was having a hard time understanding what was going on. I could barely breathe, but I had no ability to speak at the moment.
My eyelids were feeling heavy, and I just wanted to sleep...
- - -
I woke up again, laying down on a bed in a hospital. There was someone standing next to me. That man had a white uniform instead of a green one, and he wasn"t wearing a mask. I was alone in the room with him. He was holding some papers and a pen in his hands.
When he saw me waking up, he got closer and looked into my eyes. I was feeling a bit uncomfortable as he was examining me closely.
"h.e.l.lo." he said, softly. "Can you hear me?"
"I hear you." I said. I could easily talk this time.
"How are you feeling?" he asked.
"I"m... I feel a bit weak, but otherwise... I think I am okay." I said.
"Is there any pain?" he asked.
"No." I answered. "What is going on here?" I began asking questions.
"You don"t remember how you were brought here?" he asked.
"I... I"m not so sure..." I tried to stand up, but the doctor held me and pushed me back down.
"Okay, don"t force yourself." he said. "It is okay to feel a bit weak right now. You need to rest for the time being, we can talk later."
"I understand."
"The medics found your phone in the area. Do you have anyone you want us to inform about your situation?" he asked.
"No." I replied. "Can I get my phone back?"
"Of- Of course." he said after a short pause. "I will get it to you in a second. Meanwhile, if you need anything else, just tell us." he said and walked away. He left the door of the room open as he went away.
Laying down on a hospital bed, the only thing I could do was to listen to the sounds coming from the corridors. As I lifted myself up a little in he bed and looked at my own body, I saw my right arm wrapped in some thick cloth.
How did I end up here?
The doctor walked into the room with my phone in his hand.
"There it is. Although, I must warn you again, don"t force your body for now. Just lay down and rest. We will monitor your situation for a while, and you will probably get out of here this evening." he said.
"Thank you." I replied. "I just wanted to talk to someone, is that okay?"
"That"s fine." he said and walked away again. This time, he closed the door on his way out. It was completely silent in the room now.
I got my phone to make a call to the school, informing people that I wouldn"t be able to attend for that day. But just as I got my phone in my hand, it began ringing. Judging by the shapes that appeared on the phone, there was no doubt it was Cansu. The screen was covered up by a sad face emoji. I answered the call.
"Teacher, please don"t die... Please!" she said. What an interesting way to start a conversation!
"I will do my best." I said. "What the h.e.l.l is going on here?"
"You did something you would regret, so I called the ambulance." she said. "You are lucky that you had me with you. I unlocked the doors and everything, and the paramedics found you in a short time."
I remembered everything. So, that was it... She wanted to save me after my suicide attempt.
My voice became more serious.
"It was your bright idea to begin with." I told Cansu. "Are you a friend or foe?"
"I am your student, and your ally." she replied. "But I had to teach you a lesson... I never knew you could go so far and attempt suicide for real."
"Wasn"t that what you wanted?" I asked her.
"I am sorry... If you had died, I would never forgive myself! Unfortunately, you got it all wrong..." she replied. "But, in a way, this was what I was talking about."
"What do you mean?" I asked her.
"You always tend to choose the easy way out of danger." she said. "You always run away from what you need to face. We had to go down to the..."
I lowered my phone"s volume, concerned about someone pa.s.sing by the room hearing the conversation.
"...to the underground facility, yet you chose to stay away from it, finding excuses."
"I had my reasons, you know." I answered.
"I wanted to show you how weak you mentally are, by manipulating you with a negative mindset, just like how The Community used to do. In the end; you couldn"t face the truth in my words, and instead of trying to fix the situation, you decided to suicide and get rid of me and the guilt instead." she said. "Again, which is the same thing; choosing the easy way out. That was the point I was trying to make; you are making some really bad choices."
"You are right. I admit, you are right about me." I said. "I accept the accusations. But look, I really want to fix the situation. What do you want from me?" I asked.
"Toughen up. Let your past mistakes be. And the upcoming day... Please take me down to that facility, so we can end this for once, and for all." she said.
"You have a lot of confidence for sure." I said.
"You might have failed many times before, teacher, but I am not angry with you. You were overwhelmed, and you had no guidance. But this time, we will bring this evil down together!"
"Seriously, stop calling me "teacher", it feels weird." I said.
"Don"t misunderstand me. Even though I inconsiderately accuse you of having done many bad things, I know you did your best as a teacher, and I am grateful. If I were you, I couldn"t done much better. I like you as a person, and as a teacher. This won"t change." she said. "And your students will be expecting to see you tomorrow."
"Oh!" I said. "My students!"
"No worries, I already informed the school of your status." she said.
"You did? No one recognised you by your voice!?" I asked in shock.
"I no longer exist, remember?"