On Sat.u.r.day, which she always spent at home, and in very active employment in the capacities of nurse, housemaid, or even a slight taste of the cook and laundress, the evening topic was always the accounts--the two young heads anxiously casting the balance--proud and pleased if there were even a shilling below the mark, but serious and sad under such a communication as, "There"s mutton gone up another halfpenny;" or, "Wilmet, I really am afraid those boots of mine cannot be mended again;" or again, "See what Lance has managed to do to this jacket. If one only could send boys to school in sacking!"
"Are not there a few pence to spare for the chair for Cherry? She will certainly get ill, if she never goes out now spring is coming on."
"Indeed, Felix, I don"t know how! If there is a penny over, it is wanted towards shoes for Bernard; and Cherry begs me, with tears in her eyes, not to let her be an expense!"
Poor Geraldine! the costing anything, and the sense of uselessness, were becoming, by the help of her nightly wakefulness, a most terrible oppression on her spirits. Her father was right. His room had been a hot-bed to a naturally sensitive and precocious character, and the change that had come over her as time carried her farther and farther away from him, affected her more and more.
Her brother and sister, busy all day, and scarcely ever at home, hardly knew what was becoming a sore perplexity to Mr. Audley.
A young tutor, not yet twenty-six, could not exactly tell what to do with a girl not fourteen, who fell into floods of tears on the smallest excuse.
"No, no, Cherry--that is not the nominative."
The voice faltered, struggled to go on, and melted away behind the handkerchief. Then--"O Mr. Audley, I am so sorry--"
"That"s exactly what I don"t want you to be, Cherry."
"Oh, but it was so careless," and there was another flood.
Or, "Don"t you see, Cherry, you should not have put the negative sign to that equation. My dear Cherry, what have I said?"
"Oh, oh--nothing. Only I did think--"
"We shall have you a perfect Niobe, if you go on at this rate, Cherry. Really, we must not have these lessons, if they excite you so much."
"Oh! that would be the worst punishment of all!" and the weeping became so piteously violent, that the Curate looked on in distressed helplessness.
"I know it is very tiresome of me; I would help it, if I could-- indeed I would." And she cried the more because she _had_ cried.
Or, as he came in from the town, he would hear ominous sounds, that his kind heart would not let him neglect, and would find Cherry sitting on the landing-place in a paroxysm of weeping. She always crept out of her mother"s room on these occasions, for the sight of tears distressed and excited Mrs. Underwood; and the poor child, quite unable, in her hysterical condition, to drag herself alone up that steep stair, had no alternative but to sit, on what Mr. Audley called her stool of repentance, outside the door, till she had sobbed herself into exhaustion and calm--or till either Sibby scolded her, or he heard her confession.
She had been "so cross" to Bernard, or to Angel--or, once or twice, even to Mamma. She had made an impatient answer when interrupted in her lessons or in a dream over a drawing, she had been reluctant to exert herself when wanted. She had scolded fretfully--or s.n.a.t.c.hed things away angrily, when the little ones were troublesome; and every offence of this sort was bewailed with an anguish of tears, that, by weakening her spirits and temper, really rendered the recurrence more frequent. "The one thing they trust to me, I fail in!"
He was very kind to her. He did not yield to the mannish loathing for girlish tears that began to seize on him, after the first two or three occasions. He thought and studied--tried comfort, and fancied it relaxed her--tried rebuke, and that made it worse; tried the showing her Francois de Sales" admirable counsel to Philothee, to be "doux envers soi," and saw she appreciated and admired it; but she was not an atom more douce envers soi when she had next spoken peevishly.
At last he fairly set off by the train, to lay the case before Sister Constance.
"What is to be done, when a child never does anything but cry?"
Sister Constance listened to the symptoms, and promptly answered, "Give her a gla.s.s of port wine every day, before you let her out of your room."
"If I can!"
"Tell her they are my orders. Does she eat?"
"I imagine not. I heard Felix reproaching her with a ghoul"s dinner of a grain of rice."
"Does she sleep?"
"She has told me a great deal of midnight meditation on her own deficiencies."
"She must be taken out of doors somehow or other! It is of no use to reason with her; the tears are not temper, or anything else! Poor Charlie! it is an odd capacity for you to come out in, but I suppose no one else can attend to her."
"No, poor child, she is rather worse than motherless! Well--I will find some excuse for taking her out for a drive now and then; I don"t know how to speak to the others about having the chair for her, for they are barely sc.r.a.ping on."
"Poor children! Well, this year is probably the worst. Either they will get their heads above water, or there will be a crisis. But they do sc.r.a.pe?"
"Yes. At Lady-day there was great jubilation, for the rent was paid, the taxes were ready, there was not a debt; and there was sevenpence over, with which Felix wanted to give Cherry a drive; but Wilmet, who is horribly prudent, insisted that it must go to mend Fulbert"s broken window."
"Well--poor Wilmet! one can"t blame her. How does she treat Cherry"s tears?"
"I don"t think she has much pity for them. Felix does much better with Cherry; he rocks her and pets her; though, indeed, she hardly ever breaks down when he is there; but even his Sundays are a good deal taken up--and I always hunt him out for a walk on the Sunday afternoons."
"Is he still in the choir and teaching at the Sunday school?"
"Yes--though it is not Mowbray Smith"s fault."
"What, is your colleague what you apprehended?"
"My Lady could not have found a curate more to her mind, or more imbued with her dislike to all that bears the name of Underwood. I own it is hard to have one"s predecessor flung constantly in one"s teeth, and by the very people who were the greatest thorns to dear Underwood himself. Then Clem, who was a born prig, though a very good boy, gave some of his little interfering bits of advice before he went away, and it has all been set down to Felix"s account! One Sunday, Smith made a complaint of Felix having the biggest boys in the school. It was the consequence of his having taken them whenever his father could not, till it came to his having them entirely. He always took great pains with them, and there was a fellow-feeling between him and them that could hardly be with an older person. I said all this--too strongly, most likely--and the Rector put in a mild word, as to his goodness in coming at all. Smith thought there was nothing wonderful in liking what ministered to his conceit; and at last it came out that a baker"s boy had met Felix and Smith consecutively in the street, and only touched his hat to one, and that the wrong one."
"I should have been only thankful that he touched his hat to anybody."
"That is the very remark by which I put my foot in it, but my Lady was horrified, and the consequence was, that it fell to me to advise Felix to resign the cla.s.s. I never hated a piece of work so much in my life, for he had worked the lads well, and we both knew that there would be an end of them. Moreover, Felix has some of the true Briton about him, and he stood out--would give up the cla.s.s if the Rector ordered him, but would relinquish Sunday-school altogether in that case; and the two girls were furious; but, after one Sunday, he came to me, said that he found hostility poisoned his teaching, gave up, and accepted the younger ones."
"Of course the boys deserted."
"Which has not softened Smith, though it has made him tolerate Felix in the choir. His voice is of very little use at present; but he is such an influence, that we should be glad of him if he could not sing a note, and he clings to it with all his heart. I believe music is about the only pleasure he has, and it excites his mother too much to have any at home. We have little Lance in the choir now, with a voice like a thrush in a dewy morning."
Mr. Audley acted on the port-wine prescription, to the horror and dismay of Cherry, who only submitted with any shadow of philosophy on being told that the more she cried the more necessary she rendered it; but on the Sat.u.r.day, Sister Constance suddenly knocked at Mr.
Audley"s door. She had been talking the matter over with the Superior; and the result was, that she had set off on a mission to see for herself, and if she thought it expedient, to bring Geraldine back with her. She had chosen Sat.u.r.day as the time for seeing Wilmet, and was prepared to overlook that the stairs were a Lodore of soap, this being Sibby"s cleaning day, while Wilmet kept guard over the mother and the twins.
Geraldine was in the sitting-room, writing a Latin exercise, with a great pucker in her forehead whenever Angela looked up from her wooden bricks to speak to her. And though the sharp little pinched face was all one beam of joy as the visitor came in, Sister Constance saw at once that the child"s health had deteriorated in these last months. She sat down, and with Angela on her lap, questioned anxiously. Cherry had no complaints--she always was like this in the spring. How was her foot? As usual, a falter. Was it _really_? Well, yes, she thought so. And then, as the motherly eyes looked into hers, there came a burst of the ready tears; and "Oh, _please_ don"t talk about it--_please_ don"t ask."
"I know what you are afraid of," said Sister Constance, remembering her horror of the Bexley medical attendant, "but is it right to conceal this, my dear child?"
"I don"t think I do," said Cherry pitifully. "You know Sibby _does_ it every night, and it only aches a little more now. And if they did find it out, then they would have _him_, and there would be a doctor"s bill, and, oh! that would be dreadful!"
Sister Constance saw that the question of right or wrong would be infinitely too much for Geraldine, and drew off her mind from it to tell of the good accounts of Robina from Catsacre, and Clement from Whittingtonia; but when presently Wilmet was so far free as to come in with _only_ the boy-baby in her arms, and take the guest up to take off her bonnet, it was the time for entering on the subject.
"Cherry? do you think her looking ill? She always is poorly in the spring, you know."
"I do not like what I hear of her appet.i.te, or her sleep, or her spirits."
"Oh! but Cherry is always fanciful, you know. Please, please don"t put things in her head."
"What kind of things do you mean?"