"I told him so from the first," said Fernando.
"Then he has no power to force you away."
Fernando was silent. Then he said, "If I could have gone after my Baptism."
"Would you have wished that?" said Mr. Audley, somewhat disappointed.
The tears were now on the long black lashes.
"Oh, don"t think me ungrateful, or-- But this English life does come over me as intolerably dull and slow. No life nor go in it. Sometimes I feel sick of it; and going back to books and all, after what I have been used to. If my uncle could wait for my Baptism, or," more hesitating, "if I could be baptized at once. Men do lead Christian lives out there. I would try to keep from evil, Mr. Audley. I see your face! Is this another temptation of the devil?"
"I think it is an attempt of his," said Mr. Audley, sadly. "Even here you have not been able to abstain entirely from giving way to your old pa.s.sion, when you had little temptation, and felt your honour bound. What will it be when you have comparatively no restraint?"
"I am resolved not to go unbaptized," said Fernando. "I said so from the first, but he will not wait! Yet if my father sends for me, I must go."
"Then it will be your duty, and you will have more right to look for help. Besides, a summons from your father could not come for three or four months, and in that time you would have had time to gain something in Christian practice and training."
"Oh, there is the bell! Must you go, Mr. Audley? He will come back!"
"I wish I could stay, but Smith is gone to Dearport, and I do not know whether the Rector is in. Besides, this must be your own doing, Fernan, not mine. I shall pray for you, that you well know. Pray for yourself, for this is a real crisis of life. G.o.d bless you, my dear boy." He laid his hand on the head, and Fernando looked up gratefully, then said, "You never did that before. May Lance come to me, if he has not gone?"
"I will call him," said Mr. Audley, seeing that he really dreaded being alone. The little boy was on the stairs with something in his hand. "Go in to Fernan," he was told, "he wants you. What have you got there?"
"This queer drawing. Cherry found it in an old portfolio, and has been copying it."
It was Ketzsch"s outline of the chess-player, and it almost startled Mr. Audley by its appropriateness. He went out to Evensong, and never was more glad to get back to reinforce the feeble garrison.
Lance opened the front door to him. "I"m so glad you are come!" he said. "Mr. Bruce is there."
"Not the uncle?"
"No, only Mr. Bruce."
Mr. Bruce was a lawyer, and a very respectable man, in whom Mr.
Audley felt confidence. He rose at the clergyman"s entrance, and asked to speak to him in another room, so he was taken into the little back dining-room, and began--"This is a very unpleasant business, Mr. Audley; this gentleman is very much annoyed, and persuaded that he has a right to carry off his nephew; but as I told him, it all turns upon the father"s expressions. Have you any written authority from him?"
Mr. Audley had more than one letter, thanking him, and expressing full satisfaction in the proposed arrangements for Fernando; and this Mr. Bruce thought was full justification, together with the youth"s own decided wishes. The words were likewise clear, by which William Travis had given consent to his son"s Baptism, but there was no witness of them. Mr. Bruce explained that Alfred Travis, who seemed to regard Fernando as the common property of the brothers, had come to him in what he gently termed "a great state of excitement,"
complaining of a Puseyite plot. He had evidently taken umbrage at the tone of the letters he had opened for his brother, and had been further prejudiced by some Dearport timber merchant he had met at Liverpool, who had told him how the parson had got hold of his nephew, and related a farrago of gossip about St. Oswald"s. He was furious at the opposition, and could not understand that law in the old country was powerless in this case, because he was neither father nor guardian. In fact he seemed to be master of his brother; and Mr.
Bruce told Mr. Audley that it was quite to be considered whether though law was on his side now, the father might not be brought over to the brother"s side, be very angry at the detention of the boy, and refuse the payment, which, while he was in America, could not be forced from him. Of that Mr. Audley could happily afford to run the risk; and Mr. Bruce said he had also set before the young gentleman that he might have to suffer much displeasure from his father for his present refusal, although his right to make it was incontestable. To this Fernando had likewise made up his mind; and Mr. Bruce, who had never seen him before, thought he looked utterly unfit for a long journey and sea voyage, so that the uncle had taken nothing by his application to the law.
Fernando was flushed and panting, but more resolute, for resentment at the attempt at force had come to back him up, and rouse the spirit of resistance. Not half an hour had elapsed before there was another ring at the door. The uncle and lawyer were come together now. It was to make a last offer to Fernando; Mr. Alfred Travis offered to take him up to London the next day, and there to have advice as to the safety of the voyage, in the meantime letting him be baptized, if nothing else would satisfy him, but by some London clergyman--not one of the Bexley set whom the uncle regarded with such aversion.
Fernando drew himself up, and stood, leaning on the end of the sofa.
"Thank you, uncle," he said, "I cannot. I am obeying my father now, and I will not leave those to whom he trusted me."
There followed a volley of abuse of his English obstinacy and Spanish pride and canting conceit, which made Mr. Bruce stand aghast, and Fernando look up with burning cheeks and eyes glowing like hot coals; but with the Indian impa.s.sibility he did not speak till Alfred Travis had threatened him not only with his father"s displeasure, but with being cast off by both, and left to his English friends" charity.
"My father will not!" said Fernando. "If he sends for me I will come." But there his strength suddenly collapsed, and he was forced to sit down and lean back.
"Well, Fernan," said his uncle, suddenly withdrawing his attempt when he found it vain, "you seem hardly in marching order, so I"m off by the night train; but if you change your mind in the next week, write to me at Peter Brown"s--you know--and I"ll run down. I will save you the coming out by yourself. Good-bye."
Mr. Bruce tarried one moment to aver that he was unprepared for his client"s violence, and that he thought the nephew had done quite right.
The door was shut, and Mr. Audley came back holding out his hand, but Fernando did not take it. He was occupied in supporting himself by the furniture from the sofa to the fireplace, where, holding by the mantelpiece with one hand, he took his dice from his pocket with the other, and threw them into the reddest depth. Then he held the hand to Mr. Audley, who wrung it, and said, "It has been a hard fight, my boy."
Fernando laid his weary head on his shoulder, and said, "If my father is not poisoned against me!"
"Do not fear that, Fernando. You are where he left you. You have given up something for the sake of your new Lord and Master; you will have his armour another time."
Fernando let himself be helped to sit down, and sighed. He was thoroughly worn out, and his victory was not such as to enliven his spirits. He took up the drawing that lay on the table, and gazed on it in a sort of dreamy fascination.
"You have checked him this time," said Mr. Audley.
"Here or there, I will never bet again," said Fernan solemnly.
"G.o.d help me to keep the resolution! It is the one thing that I care for, and I know I should have begun the first day I was away from you."
"I think that with those tastes you cannot make too strong a resolution against it," said Mr. Audley.
Their dinner was brought in, but Fernando had no appet.i.te. He soon returned to his chess player, and seemed to be playing over the game, but he was too much tired for talk, and soon went to bed; where after a short sleep feverishness set in, bringing something approaching to delirium. The nurse had gone a fortnight previously; but as he was still too helpless to have no one within call, Felix slept on the bed in the corner of the room.
When he came down the opening of the door was greeted by "Don"t let him come! Is Mr. Audley there!"
"Yes, he is not gone."
Then he knew Felix, but soon began again to talk of the game at chess, evidently mixing up his uncle with the personage with the long feather.
"He has been checked once. I"ve taken one piece of his. He is gone now. Will he come back after my Baptism? No; I shall go to him."
This lasted till past midnight, when, as they were deliberating whether to send for Mr. Rugg, he fell soundly asleep, and awoke in the morning depressed, but composed and peaceful; and this state of things continued. The encounter with his uncle, and the deliberate choice, had apparently given some shock to his nerves; and whenever night recurred, there came two or three hours of misery, and apparently of temptation and terror. It took different forms.
Sometimes it was half in sleep--the acting over again of one or two horrible scenes that he had partly witnessed in the Southern States, when an emanc.i.p.ator had been hunted down, and the slaves who had listened to him savagely punished. In spite of his Spanish blood, the horror had been ineffaceable; and his imagination connected it with the crowd of terrors that had revealed themselves to his awakened conscience. He seemed to think that if he lost in the awful game of life, he should be handed over to that terrible slave-master; and there were times when Diego"s fate, and his own lapses, so fastened on his mind, as to make him despair of ever being allowed to quit that slave-master"s dominions; and that again joined with alarm lest his uncle should return and claim him.
Sometimes, likewise, the old wandering life, with the flashes of rollicking mirth and excitement, rather glimpsed at and looked forward to than really tasted, would become so alluring a contrast to the flat and tasteless--nay, as it seemed to him, tedious and toilsome--future sketched out for him, and the restraints and constant watchfulness of a Christians life appeared so distressing a bondage, that his soul seemed to revolt against it, and he would talk of following his uncle at once to London while yet it was time, and writing to him the next morning. This state was sure to be followed by a pa.s.sion of remorse, and sheer delirious terror lest he should be given up to the enemy, who seemed now to a.s.sume to his fancy the form of his uncle. A great deal was no doubt delirious, and this betrayed the struggles which he had been for weeks fighting out in silence and apparent impa.s.siveness; but it was impossible not to feel that therewith was manifested the wrestling with the Prince of Darkness, ere his subject should escape from his territory, and claim the ransom of his manumission. Mr. Audley--after the second night--would not let Felix remain, but took the watch entirely on himself, and fought the battle with the foe by prayer and psalm. Sleep used to come before morning; and by day Fernando was himself again, very subdued and quiet, and, in fact, having lost a good deal of ground as to health.
Strange to say, the greatest pleasure he had at this time was sitting in the upstairs parlour. The custom had begun in consequence of his nervous shuddering at being left alone lest his uncle should return, and Felix and Geraldine had then proposed taking him to their mother, who was rather interested than annoyed by his presence, and indeed all her gentle motherly instinct was drawn out by his feebleness and lameness; she talked to him kindly and quite rationally, and he was wonderfully impressed and soothed by her tenderness. It was so utterly unlike anything he had ever even seen, that he watched her with a sort of awe; while Cherry worked, read aloud, or drew, and felt proud of being able to fetch what was beyond the capacity of her little errand boy, Bernard.
The children, too, entertained him; he was a little afraid of Bernard"s roughness, but delighted in watching him, and he and little Stella were intensely admiring friends. She always knew him, cooed at him, and preferred the gold of his watch-chain to all things in nature or art. Then when Wilmet, Angela, and Lance came home, and family chatter began, the weary anxious brain rested; and even in that room, so sad to most eyes, Fernando began to realise what Christian peace and cheerfulness could be.
CHAPTER VIII
THE HOME
"Within those walls each fluttering guest Is gently lured to one safe nest; Without, "tis moaning and unrest."