Seductive-and dangerous, in that you never knew what hit you until it was too late. Until you were trapped, bound by tradition and the expectations of people you didn"t even know.
Well, no more. He"d weakened for a moment and taken up the mantle they all wanted to thrust on him, but he could throw it off just as easily.
He turned to Lani, who stood just to the side of the wide bed, already rumpled by their almost-lovemaking. She"d said she was so happy, that she wanted to climb in that bed with him. All lies.
"You disgust me."
She flinched slightly, as if his words stung her. "I"m sorry."
"More lies. You"re not sorry, or you wouldn"t have done it."
"I did tell you the truth."
"I"m sure you have your own motives for that choice, too." Perhaps the prospect of bedding a man she didn"t love-or even like-had proved too much for even her hardened sensibilities? "No doubt you"ve decided that marriage to your husband"s brother is too much to stomach-tradition be d.a.m.ned."
She blinked. "I"m willing to marry you."
AJ let out a growl. "Willing? How kind of you to be so generous with your life. With your body. Allow me to throw your sacrifice back at you. Please leave." He gestured to the door, hand shaking with fury. Her wide-eyed desire of only a few minutes ago was so obviously fake, and it disgusted him that she"d tried to trap him into s.e.x with her when she viewed the entire arrangement as a ch.o.r.e.
But she didn"t move.
"Leave." His command echoed off the walls, and no doubt out into the night since the windows were open.
Lani seemed to shrink a little. She gathered her dress about her. "The guests are probably still here."
"Then what are you worried about? That they"ll see you in a state of undress and a.s.sume you"ve been in my bed? I thought that was what you wanted." He narrowed his eyes. "Or was that only when you intended to trick them into thinking your baby was mine. It doesn"t look so good if you sleep with me when you"re pregnant with my brother"s baby, does it?"
She shook her head. "I didn"t want any of this." Tears welled in her eyes.
"Me, either, but you at least chose your role by marrying my brother. I got shoved into this dog-and-pony show from the moment I was born. It took me years to work my way out of it and I almost made the biggest mistake of my life letting you and my mom suck me back into it with trickery and deception. With a face like that I"d imagine you"re used to getting your own way."
Her tear-filled gaze only fueled the indignation p.r.i.c.king his muscles. "I told you to go."
If she didn"t get out of here, he might get suckered in by some sob story she"d cook up. She still clutched her dress awkwardly about her. He grabbed her sash off the floor and thrust it at her, his fingers instinctively flinching back from hers as she took it. Her touch was deadly and her wanted her out of sight and mind before anything else could happen.
Less than an hour ago he"d promised to stay and take his place as king here. Filled with ancestral pride and hope for the future, he"d enjoyed the sense of comrades.h.i.+p and even destiny as people welcomed him home.
Under false pretenses. There was already a new king or queen waiting to take the throne, hidden beneath the rumpled folds of Lani"s dress.
She struggled with the sash, wrapping its length about her still-slim waist. He wondered if there really was a baby. Perhaps this was her last-ditch effort to send him running? He didn"t know what to believe anymore. Confusion and anger warred inside him. He was used to being the director, setting up the action, telling people what to do. If something didn"t work out he could fix it in post-production-ruthlessly cutting and even reshooting if needed.
There were no retakes in real life.
Her sash now retied, Lani slipped on her sandals. Her fingers shook-and that stirred a trace of pity in his heart.
He crushed it quickly and moved to open the door. From down the corridor he could hear voices, the sound of feet on the stone. Revelers leaving the party. What kind of scandal would it cause for Lani to run past them, eyes filled with tears?
Surely they"d expect no less from a grieving widow forced into marriage with a man she barely knew. Nothing about this situation was pretty.
Lani hesitated in the doorway, plucking nervously at her silk dress.
"Can"t face them?" His voice was cold. "Maybe you could just tell them the truth, like you did with me."
She hadn"t said a word for some time and her silence was starting to rub him raw. Who was she to stand there looking so innocent and hard-done-by? Suddenly he was the bad guy, the one who threatened to ruin everyone"s careful plans.
Lani"s lips quivered before she finally spoke. "Your mom wants to keep it a secret."
"Do you do everything she tells you?"
Her silence answered his question.
Irritation flashed over him. "She needs to learn that you can"t manipulate people like puppets." Maybe that"s where Vanu got it from. He"d certainly pulled the strings in their world from behind the scenes. It was time for someone to snap the strings right off. He grabbed her arm, hating the way his skin heated when he touched her. "Come on, let"s get this charade over with."
Lani pulled her arm back. Not wanting to get into a wrestling match, he let it go. "It was such a happy evening for your mother."
AJ frowned. He could still hear the hypnotic drumbeats somewhere in the distance. People were dancing and laughing and enjoying the vision of the future they"d all conjured together such a short time earlier.
"Your mom"s been so sad lately. Can"t we let her enjoy her party?" She didn"t meet his gaze.
"Let the happy charade continue and ignore reality for another day?" His muscles tightened. "Why not? But I don"t think that should extend to keeping you in my room all night." He shot her a harsh look. "It"s a little too crowded in here with you and your baby."
Not to mention your dead husband. He didn"t say that, though. He wasn"t totally insensitive. He didn"t say that, though. He wasn"t totally insensitive.
"Would you mind escorting me along the corridor?" She said it softly, still not lifting her eyes to his. Very Rahiian and traditional. "Everyone will know something"s wrong if they see me by myself."
He was tempted to say no. Everything was wrong; it was better people should find out. This whole pretense sickened him. And he hated the way Lani"s soft voice tugged at his sympathies and made him want to save her from humiliation.
How could she be so infuriating and still so beautiful at the same time? Her skin glowed in the soft light from the wall sconces, and her hair s.h.i.+mmered like gold thread. "Sure," he growled.
He did not touch her this time. No need to feel heat flash over his skin where there should be revulsion. He marched down the corridor with Lani hurrying along beside him in her long dress. Lani"s room was on the other side of the palace, past the area where the party was still taking place. Laughter and music spilled into the hallway as they marched on. Groups stood chatting in the hallway outside the ballroom, smiling as they approached.
AJ"s insides contracted. All these people now saw them as the happy couple with a bright future ahead of them.
If they only knew.
"So serious, Arun." An older man he recognized as one of his father"s ministers smiled at him. "Already the weight of responsibility is carving lines into your face."
He attempted to soften what must be quite a scowl. "I"m just escorting Lani back to her room. She"s tired." He didn"t have to make up stories.
"I"m sure she is." He didn"t wiggle his eyebrows but the implication was there. AJ saw a slight flush rise to Lani"s cheeks.
She should be embarra.s.sed. That"s exactly what she"d wanted. Now everyone thought they"d sealed their pact with wild lovemaking. He cursed the desire that still coursed through his body at the sight of her. All his instincts had told him to stay far, far away from Lani and everything she represented.
They"d been right.
"Your mother is so happy, Arun. What joy you"re bringing to all our people." The former minister"s wife patted his forearm. "And I"ve never seen a lovelier couple."
The last remark was addressed to Lani, who replied, "You"re sweet, but I really must get some rest."
Her smile made her look so innocent and adorable. They had no idea why she needed rest.
AJ"s tension eased slightly as they moved away from the excited guests and down the dimly lit corridor away from the ballroom. He had no intention of returning this way and facing innuendo about exactly what he and Lani had been up to. He"d rather traverse the pitch-dark garden.
Lani now walked ahead of him, shoulders tight under the fall of hair cascading to her waist.
Just a half hour ago he"d run his fingers though that silken ma.s.s and imagined them as partners-husband and wife. That idea had evaporated like the dawn mist, and now she again seemed like a semi-hostile stranger.
When she reached her room, Lani turned and fixed wide, worried eyes on him. "Thank you for helping me run the gauntlet."
"I don"t know why I did." He c.o.c.ked his head. "Obviously I"m a soft touch."
"You"re not. You"re a man of honor and that"s evident in everything you"ve said and done so far." Her voice was steady and she leveled a clear gaze at him. "You should be king and it"s a terrible shame if I"ve somehow ruined that."
Her words stopped his negative thoughts in their tracks. No one cared what Lani really wanted. She was expected to do whatever it took to ease the succession and make life easy for other people. None of this was her idea. What did she have to gain from sleeping with him, let alone marrying him? She"d probably rather be curled up with a good book and some saltines.
"Why did you agree to go along with my mom"s plot to trick me into marrying you even though you"re already pregnant with the heir?"
"She didn"t know I was pregnant when you first came. I didn"t, either. I found out that first night, when I was ill and left dinner early."
Things started to fall into place.
He frowned when he realized that first pa.s.sionate kiss had come before she knew about the baby. "So the wheels driving us into marriage were already rolling and you figured it was too late to stop them?"
"Your mom was so excited about you staying. And I liked the idea of my child being able to enjoy being a kid, without the pressure of already being a monarch. On some level the idea made sense, until..."
"Until you tried to get naked with me. Then there was nothing to hide behind."
"I"m not cut out for deception." She met his gaze with a hard stare of her own. Then it softened. "And you don"t deserve that. You"re a good man."
Her ridiculously long hair fell about her shoulders. Her oddly shaped traditional dress didn"t hold together well without the sash. Those big eyes still brimmed with tears that glittered in her thick lashes. He fought a powerful urge to take her in his arms and comfort her.
Was he angry with her or at the unfortunate effect she had on him? She was just trying to do what everyone wanted of her. Tradition had shoved her between a rock and a hard place and he couldn"t help wondering which one he was. "I am glad you told me."
"I couldn"t have lived with myself if I didn"t." She held her neat chin high.
"Why would you put up with marrying a stranger in the first place?"
She looked away for a moment. "For Rahiri." She looked back at him, expression serious. "And for your mom. You can see how happy everyone is to have you back."
He shoved a hand through his hair and let out a bitter laugh. "So you have every reason to marry me except...me."
Her cheeks darkened. "I"d have been proud to have you as my husband."
AJ shook his head. "Proud. I"m not sure that"s entirely the sentiment I"d hope for in my wife, but it"s an interesting one."
Lani swallowed, obviously embarra.s.sed by her unsatisfactory response. "I am attracted to you." Her shy whisper made a chuckle rise in his throat, and sent a jolt of l.u.s.t to his groin.
"I"m grateful for that, at least." He c.o.c.ked his head. "I wouldn"t want to marry a woman who finds me repugnant." He crossed his arms, trying to not be seduced by the rather dazed expression on her too-beautiful face. "So you were prepared to put up with me for the sake of Rahiri."
She shrugged, and for the first time a sparkle of humor lit her eyes. "I figured I could handle it."
"Your willingness to do your patriotic duty is impressive." He couldn"t stop a smile hovering at the corners of his mouth. Then he remembered she"d intended to pretend her child was his. Her traditional dress concealed her shape. "How far along are you?"
Her face tightened. "Almost two months."
"You conceived right before Vanu disappeared?"
She nodded. "That"s why I didn"t know I was pregnant. When I felt ill, or tired, I just thought it was stress."
"Vanu never knew about the baby."
"No." She held his gaze a little too boldly, as if she expected him to read something into that.
He wasn"t sure what to think. They"d been married for nearly five years, so why did she only become pregnant now? It was odd, unsettling. Too...convenient, somehow. "No one would have ever known it wasn"t my baby if you hadn"t told me."
"I would have known." Something glittered in her eyes. Determination, perhaps, or some of that steely strength hidden under her pretty exterior. Desire rose again inside him, a simmering flash of heat that warred with his anger at the deception.
"I appreciate your honesty." He hesitated, thoughts weaving themselves in his brain even as warmth rose through his body. When he"d stated his intent to become king, he"d meant it. Tradition and honor now pumped through his heart along with his red blood cells. Suddenly it had seemed as if his whole life had led up to this night, when he a.s.sumed the responsibilities of leaders.h.i.+p. He"d marshaled casts of hundreds, managed budgets and planned for contingencies. He knew how to deal with crises and manage difficult people and situations. The result, so far, had been about ninety minutes of entertainment for anyone who cared to watch, but as king of Rahiri he"d have the power to shape lives through investment in education and infrastructure.
Lani wasn"t the only reason he"d decided to stay. And now she wouldn"t be the reason he"d leave. "Maybe your little revelation doesn"t have to ruin everything."
She blinked. "No?"
"Don"t play the innocent, now." He laughed. "You know what I mean. We could still get married."
Her cheeks reddened. "Even now that you know?"
"It"s a baby." He shrugged. He could raise a child. What did it matter if it was his biological child or not? He"d never given much thought to family life, but the prospect held some appeal.
And he couldn"t deny that Lani held considerable appeal, too. Brave as well as beautiful, she"d risked everything to tell him the truth. Surely he could take a risk on a woman like that if it meant fulfilling the role everyone seemed so desperate for him to take on.
"I"m excited about having a baby." Her face brightened. "I"ve been longing for one for years. It"s like a dream come true..." Her lips faltered. "Just at the wrong time."
He wanted to ask why it had taken so long to conceive, but he held his tongue. Instead he said, "I"m not afraid of raising my brother"s baby."
A dark shard of worry sliced into his mind. What if Vanu"s baby was like Vanu? He fought off the nasty thought.
AJ flexed the muscles in his back. They suddenly felt tight, maybe under the weight of so many expectations. "So the child would never know?"
"Things could get complicated because of royal succession."
"I suppose we could tell him when he came of age, but I can see how it makes more sense to keep it quiet. When we decide it"s time for him to become king, I can quietly step aside."
"Yes, then there"s no real need for him or anyone else to know."
"And he won"t be traumatized by finding out as an adult. It does make more sense." AJ rubbed his temples, which throbbed slightly. In one evening he"d decided to change his whole life and embrace a new one-now suddenly he"d taken on fatherhood, too. A curse fell from his lips.
"What?" Lani looked alarmed.