How could she wish someone dead? Only a truly evil person would have a thought like that. Obviously she wasn"t the "nice" girl AJ had originally mistaken her for. She"d certainly jumped on him with reckless abandon, and she couldn"t even blame it on "duty" anymore. She"d made no effort to hide her l.u.s.ty enjoyment of AJ"s body.
She blew out hard. Everything had been so perfect for those few brief hours. Now she was back, snared in the web of pretense and pain that had been her marriage to Vanu. Pretending to be happy-or at least content-while inside she was longing for freedom.
A knock on the door startled her.
"Dinner is ready." The shy girl servant darted in and out like a lizard. No one would look her in the eye since Vanu"s boat was found. They"d all been so thrilled about the plans for the wedding and AJ"s return to Rahiri, and now they were supposed to be overjoyed about Vanu"s possible survival.
No one knew what to think or how to behave. Least of all Lani. AJ was giving her the cold shoulder, too. She understood that he was in an awkward situation, but it was upsetting to suddenly feel as if she couldn"t talk to him.
She wandered along the hallway slowly, not looking forward to the meal. Terrified of any further news of Vanu"s miraculous survival.
When she arrived in the dining room, she saw Priia sitting in her usual chair, sobbing, while AJ wrapped his arms around her.
All the servants hung their heads and ducked their gazes as she pa.s.sed.
"They found his body." AJ looked up and mouthed the words softly, then tugged his gaze away immediately.
Relief welled inside her like a flood. "Oh, no," she managed, trying to sound upset. Her hands started shaking and her heart pounded. She wanted to jump up and down or shout because she"d been so afraid of being Vanu"s plaything again. Happy tears sprang to her eyes and she let them roll down her cheeks.
She resisted a sharp urge to ask for details to make his death real, but managed to restrain herself. What did it matter how he died, as long as he was really gone for good.
AJ looked up at her tears, then glanced away. Priia"s sobbing was merciless, inconsolable, as it had been in those first days and nights after Vanu disappeared.
"I"m so sorry, Mama," whispered Lani. She stroked Priia"s hand. "It was too much of a miracle to hope for." Her own tears splashed into her mother-in-law"s lap and mingled with Priia"s, despite their very different motivations.
"At least we"ll have his child," rasped Priia. Lani"s eyes widened. Apparently in her grief she was forgetting that no one knew about the pregnancy. She glanced around. The servants had tactfully left the room. Still...
AJ"s brow was lowered and his expression dark. He wouldn"t meet her gaze.
"The child will give us something to live for," continued Priia, through her sobs. "It does seem cruel that we have to go through mourning him again. I was finally coming to terms with his loss, and now..." Her shoulders shook.
Lani squeezed her hand. "We"ll just have to go on as best we can."
"I"ve got some phone calls to make." AJ"s voice was gruff. Lani looked up, startled, as he strode from the room. She wanted to run after him, to ask him for details about Vanu"s death-perhaps to rea.s.sure herself that this time he really was dead.
She also wanted rea.s.surance that everything was still okay between them.
Her stomach contracted and a wave of nausea rose through her. Her first in several days. She had a grim feeling that everything had changed between her and AJ. That Vanu"s unexpected reappearance, even in death, had somehow ruined everything.
AJ stormed along the palace corridor, blood pounding in his brain. How had he ever thought this could work? Had he really believed he could step into Vanu"s shoes-precious Vanu, the beloved eldest son who could do no wrong-and take over?
Ridiculous. He must have been totally addled by l.u.s.t. It was hard to blame himself because, after all, Lani was undeniably one of the most beautiful women on earth. He"d let desire interfere with his common sense and even convinced himself that she had feelings for him.
But of course she hadn"t fallen madly in love with him right after her husband"s death. She was still in shock, especially with the pregnancy messing up her hormones. He"d come on way too strong and she"d reacted as she felt she was supposed to. Just trying to be a "nice Rahiian maiden," when all along she was carrying a torch for Vanu.
He shoved into his room. The room he"d spent his childhood in and been glad to leave. Which seemed ungrateful, since not many people would complain about s.p.a.cious chambers in a royal palace. But they"d felt like a prison to him once, and now the decorative carvings started to look like bars again. He"d almost-almost-been trapped into living someone else"s life.
He picked up the phone and pushed the third b.u.t.ton on his speed dial. His producer, Jerry. When Jerry answered he didn"t mince words. "I"ll be back tomorrow. Sooner if I can get a flight."
"But I thought your brother turned up dead."
"He did."
"Sorry, I didn"t mean to say that so crudely. I"m sorry for your loss."
"I know. It"s okay." Being honest that you were glad someone was dead was one of the last taboos left.
"Doesn"t that mean that you need to take over?"
"You can"t take over from a living G.o.d, and I"m not going to walk in his shadow the rest of my life. I"ve got a good life in L.A. and I"m coming back to it."
"Isn"t there some tradition that you have to marry your brother"s wife?" Jerry"s tone didn"t hide his curiosity-the same kind of prurient interest that had sent the media chasing down to Rahiri to ogle them.
"There was, but I"m breaking with it. Why should she be forced into marrying someone she doesn"t care about?" Not to mention giving her late husband"s baby to him to raise. His chest tightened.
"That is a bit heavy. Still, you two looked good together on Entertainment Tonight Entertainment Tonight."
"Jerry, you and I know better than anyone how easy it is to create an illusion with a camera."
"Too true. Well, if you"re ready, we"ll soon be right back at it. Give me a call when you hit town and we"ll hash through some details."
"Perfect."
AJ put down the phone, a mixture of conviction and regret mingling in his heart. What a vivid fantasy it had been, for a few brief days. King AJ and his lovely family, ruling the island paradise he"d finally come home to.
Way too sappy to put in a movie, so why would he think it could happen in real life?
He jerked open the closet door and grabbed an armful of clothes off the rack. Shoved them right into his suitcase. He didn"t need servants to fold and fluff everything for him. He"d gotten along just fine without them for over a decade and he was d.a.m.ned if he"d turn into a spoiled fop like Vanu.
He went into the bathroom and swiped his toiletries off the marble shelf and into a plastic bag. A scan of the room confirmed that he"d removed all traces of his brief presence.
Now to confront Lani.
His chest ached. He"d so much rather have slipped away without seeing her again. Experience had proved he didn"t have much self-control around her. Getting to know her hadn"t helped, either. Did he really have to find out that she was warm and thoughtful as well as gorgeous? It would have been better if he"d left right after the funeral.
He would have preferred as well not to know how responsive and exciting she was during s.e.x. If that"s how she performed with a man she was being forced to marry while still mourning her husband, imagine what she"d be like if she was really in love?
Don"t. There was no point in thinking about what-ifs. He was not going to partic.i.p.ate in this arranged marriage charade any longer. There was no point in thinking about what-ifs. He was not going to partic.i.p.ate in this arranged marriage charade any longer.
He zipped up his suitcase and pulled out the handle. Soon he"d be marching along the corridors at LAX, a free man again.
Finding Lani wasn"t easy. He walked all over the palace, asking everyone he met for almost an hour, tension building in his muscles, before he finally tracked her down on a stone bench by a reflecting pool in the garden.
She glanced up, startled, as he approached.
"Don"t worry. I"m not staying." He almost growled the words, then regretted his hostile tone. This whole mess wasn"t really her fault. She"d been bullied into it, the same way he had.
He glanced at the round pool, where reflected leaves danced across its s.h.i.+mmering surface, hiding its depths from view. "You"ll be a good queen until the baby comes of age. The elders are wise and thoughtful and really don"t need any help to run the country, though I"m sure they"ll welcome new ideas about education and-"
"You"re not really leaving." Her eyes widened.
"I really am. Booked on tonight"s flight. Back on the course I should have stuck with from day one." Before he"d become intrigued, then utterly seduced, by her.
Her face totally still, she stared at him, apparently lost for words. And why should she have to come up with words? They were all tired of saying things they didn"t mean. She that she was thrilled to be marrying a total stranger, he that he was so sad his rotten older brother was dead. Enough with the pretense.
"It"ll be hard on Mom. That"s the one part I really regret."
Lani blinked. He saw her shoulders stiffen. "Yes. But why are you leaving? Is it because of me?" Her lips tightened.
"It"s not because of you." He shoved a hand through his hair. He owed her his honesty after all they"d been through over the last few days. "If anything, you"re the reason I almost made the wrong decision to stay. You"re a good person, Lani, as well as a very beautiful one. But you"re my brother"s wife, not mine. I can"t step into his life and walk in his footsteps. I have my own life that I made for myself, and that"s where I need to be."
"Everyone wants you to stay." Her voice was oddly hollow.
AJ straightened his back. "Everyone? I doubt it. I don"t think people pay much more attention to who"s in the palace than to who"s on Instant Millionaire Instant Millionaire every Wednesday. I"m going to make an announcement to the media so there won"t be any guessing and suspense." every Wednesday. I"m going to make an announcement to the media so there won"t be any guessing and suspense."
"Have you told Priia yet?" Lani twisted her hands into her skirt.
AJ"s stomach clenched. "I"m going to tell her now, and I know it won"t be easy."
"She"ll be devastated."
"I know, but it can"t be helped." Better than entering into a marriage with a woman who hadn"t chosen him, and who"d never stop being his brother"s wife.
Lani looked down at her lap, avoiding his glance. Maybe she resented the fact that he"d decided to put emotion before duty. After all, she"d demonstrated her readiness to sacrifice everything for the good of Rahiri.
He wasn"t made of such stern stuff.
And he really did want her to be happy. "I hope the rest of your pregnancy goes smoothly." His voice softened. "And that the birth is uneventful. You"ll be able to tell everyone that it"s Vanu"s baby now. No more living a lie."
Lani swallowed. "Yes. I suppose that"s good." Her voice sounded flat. "Things did get awfully complicated."
"Which should have been the first clue we were heading in the wrong direction." His fingers itched to touch her, just one last time. To feel her soft skin beneath his palm and inhale her delicate floral scent.
But he resisted. "Goodbye, Lani."
"Goodbye, AJ." She looked up at last, wide eyes br.i.m.m.i.n.g with tears. "Good luck to you. I hope everything works out the way you want it to."
He frowned. "Thanks. And for you and the baby, too. I"m sure I"ll be in touch after things settle down a bit."
She nodded, lips pressed together. She hadn"t risen from the bench. Just sat there like a lovely statue, fingers twisted into the silk of her dress.
He spun on his heel and marched away before he could do anything stupid.
Lani slumped on the bench as he walked away. She didn"t even have the urge to run after him. It seemed normal, natural, that she should be left here alone and loveless while he went back to his life in L.A. Isn"t that just what she"d expected, after all?
He"d been swept along on the tide of excitement that they"d mistaken for destiny-all the pomp of the funeral and Priia"s festive gathering-and he"d gotten temporarily sidetracked into thinking he"d like to return to Rahiri.
Vanu"s unwitting intervention had woken him up.
Trust Vanu to ruin everything.
The reappearance of his boat and the resulting hitch in their plans had given AJ time to realize he didn"t want the life Priia had plotted out for him-or her.
It hurt-really hurt.
She pressed her fingers gently into her belly and tried to ignore the hollow s.p.a.ce that seemed to be opening up inside her. At least she had the baby to look forward to, and AJ was right, the elders could rule the country without any help from the palace. They"d certainly been doing it while Vanu was king, as he"d taken zero interest in the country"s affairs. Rahiri would be fine.
But would she?
It didn"t seem fair to taste happiness like that, then have it rudely s.n.a.t.c.hed away.
At first she"d been wary of AJ, and hoped he"d leave. But now that she"d gotten to know him, she wanted desperately for him to stay. He"d looked genuinely excited about raising the baby with her. She"d been so sure that-at last-everything was going to work out for the best. That she"d finally get to be happy.
But that had been too much to hope for.
A few weeks ago she"d have been pleased to be left quietly alone. She hadn"t known about the baby then, but she"d at least been relieved to be rid of Vanu. Now she craved the family she"d always wanted as a child. A mother and father together, as hers had been when she was little, before their marriage broke up and she and her mother came back to Rahiri.
She let out a deep sigh, picked up a small stone and tossed it into the pool. A splash radiated out into huge ripples that filled the round surface and lapped against the walls. AJ"s arrival had changed everything, even her dreams.
She no longer wanted to be left quietly alone, merely to live out her days without having to endure cruel treatment from a man she despised. Now she wanted so much more: affection, conversation, humor and, of course, the dangerous and delicious pa.s.sion that AJ had awakened in her.
But AJ didn"t want to share it with her. He"d chosen to return to his life in L.A. and the freedom that came with it. He wouldn"t be tied down by responsibilities to a nation, or a woman.
Sadness soaked through her. Probably right now AJ was telling the reporters who never left the palace of his plans to abandon Rahiri-and her. In a short while she"d be paraded in front of them to embrace her new, solitary role as queen, and to announce the pregnancy.
And she"d do it all alone. Not physically alone, with her doting mother-in-law and the palace staff all around her, but in the ways that were important, the empty, hungry places in her heart, she"d be alone.
"We must stop him!" Priia"s voice rang out into the garden from the nearby sitting room. "I told him he can"t go. It"s impossible!"
"We can"t stop him," Lani mouthed back in barely a whisper.
Her mother-in-law ran out into the garden and grabbed her arms. "AJ"s heading for the airport." Her long nails cut into Lani"s skin. "He can"t leave us. We need him."
"I know we want him here." Lani rose and spoke softly. "But he needs to leave and we have to let him."
Priia"s eyes were still wide with shock. "I could call the airport and tell them to ground the plane."
Lani shook her head. "You can"t keep him here by force. It has to be his choice."
"But he chose to stay. He announced to all of us at the banquet that he..." The first tear rolled from Priia"s dark eyes.
You pressured him into it, Lani wanted to say. But she held her tongue. No need to pour salt on Priia"s already sore wounds. But this was exactly why it was a bad idea to go after him now. Trying to force the issue hadn"t helped at all. He was still leaving, and they were right back where they started. Lani wanted to say. But she held her tongue. No need to pour salt on Priia"s already sore wounds. But this was exactly why it was a bad idea to go after him now. Trying to force the issue hadn"t helped at all. He was still leaving, and they were right back where they started.
Which wasn"t such a bad place after all.