"Hey, blondie, just because my back is turned doesn"t mean I can"t see what you"re doing."
I smile. "My gran used to do the same."
"It"s clearly a woman thing because my mother does it too." He laughs, rustling through more boxes. "Oh, now this is what I"m talking about!" he practically shrieks, charging past me in an excitable dance. I exhale a laugh at his giddiness but have no idea what he is referring to. The clunk of the stereo causes my head to turn.
"What are you doing?"
"Putting this on."
"Putting what on?" my curiosity grows but instantly falls when the blast of Christmas music pours from my speakers. "Oh G.o.d, Noel, turn it off," I groan, s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g up my face like a little girl and stamping my foot. Pathetic at twenty-five, I know, but the a.s.shole is really torturing me here.
"Now come on, Tami. You know you like it really." He starts to jig to the music, the beam spreading wider across his face. He slowly makes his way back to me, eyes squinted and face scrunched as he pretends to sing-along. My shoulders move with a silent giggle at his enthusiasm.
"You look ridiculous." I turn back to the tree, leaving him parading around the room and blurting out random lines as he dances.
"Dance with me, Tamzin."
"I"m decorating," I claim. Which is a lie because in my eyes the tree is finished and I hate to admit but it"s actually pretty d.a.m.n good; full of reds and golds and twinkling with fairy lights.
"I love this song!" I jump out my skin as he yells with the change in music. Rockin" around the Christmas tree" generated its catchy tune as my foot fails me and starts to twitch to the beat. He"s dancing close behind me, annoying the s.h.i.t out of me but that doesn"t stop my smile. His hands place on my hips, the heat of his body hits my back as he kisses my neck and I fight back a moan. "Dance with me."
"Busy, sorry." I"m twirled around in a flash as he takes my hand, pulling me towards him and pushing back out again so I twist in under his arms. "Noel." I giggle. Before I have a chance to register, I"m moving my body along to the music, swaying my hips and twirling with him. What the h.e.l.l am I doing?
"Yeah, baby, knew you had it in you."
"I can"t believe I"m dancing to stupid Christmas songs... with you."
"Admit it, you love it." He laughs, twirling me again and swaying us as he holds me. It does feel good. The laughter that erupts from my belly and the everlasting smile on my face is not the Tamzin that was in this house two weeks ago. And one can only a.s.sume that it"s the company in which I keep that"s bringing the old girl back.
Noel comes close, taking my hips in his hands and jerks me towards him. My arms move around his neck. Rotating his hips to mine, he manoeuvres my waist with his hands to grind against each other. Pushing back, I giggle and shake my head. "No way. You can"t do that to Christmas songs."
"You can do anything to any song." There"s a sparkle in his eyes, a hint of naughtiness in his features.
"Well, not that. It feels a little... weird." Purely because my experience of dancing to Christmas songs was with my grandpa.
"Oh, Tami, you really need to lighten up."
I straighten my stance, and rest my hands on my hips with a c.o.c.ked brow. "Are you mocking me, Noel?"
With a sn.i.g.g.e.r, he steps toward me. I take one back each time he gets closer and instantly the mood has changed. His eyes darken with his prowl, and the kindle in my belly ignites as the air thickens with heat. Before I know it, I am backed up against the wall, his sculpted body a fraction from mine as he takes my arms and places them above my head. My breathing soars as does the pulse between my legs that"s been simmering for hours. His eyes are thick with desire as they fall onto my lips.
"Still think this is weird, Tami?" he whispers. The only way in which I can answer is with a shake of my head before his lips come down and steal my breath.
Noel.
Her arms are firmly against the wall as I snake my tongue into her mouth, my c.o.c.k jumping to attention with the heat that floods my veins. I force my hips into her. She makes me ache, makes me crave, makes me crazy. Keeping her arms firmly upright with one hand, I push my thumb into her mouth. I groan as she sucks hard, gliding her wetness over the bone as I imagine my c.o.c.k being in its place. "f.u.c.k, Tamzin."
Her eyes are heavy with l.u.s.t, the pulse in the dip of her neck is prominent as I lower my head to suck her skin. She moans and jerks her hips, desperate in telling me what she wants-what she needs. I pop my thumb out her mouth to pull down her top that exposes the purple lace, feeling her in my hands and pulling her pebbled nipple between my teeth. My stomach squeezes as that little whimper hits my ear. "Noel?"
"Yes, Angel."
"Can you f.u.c.k me now, please?"
I pull her vest top up over her head and lift her around my waist. Like an addiction, I press my lips to her defined collarbone that always draws me back. The deep contours and soft skin needs to be felt on my tongue as her body weakens under my grip. "Yes, I"ll f.u.c.k you now." I take us to her bedroom. I could"ve had her against the wall or over the sofa but I want to take my time with her. I want her spread out and begging.
I throw her down on the mattress, pulling my shirt over my head and falling to claim her mouth. She"s too eager. Rising into me, she laces her fingers through my hair, as I work my mouth down her red-hot body. "I"ve wanted to claim you from the moment I saw you, Tamzin." I pull off her jeans and purple panties to expose her bare p.u.s.s.y, an image I"ll never get tired of viewing. "The taste of you last night wasn"t enough for me." I spread her wide. She"s beautifully pink and waiting to be claimed. "You"re going to remember who"s been inside you. I"m going to f.u.c.k you in every possible way."
"Please," she begs, her beautiful pants escaping from her throat.
"You"re going to c.u.m so hard you"ll see stars."
I kneel back and take her in. The sight of her laid bare and begging is almost enough to have me c.u.mming in my jeans. I"m so hard. She"s hot, wet and s.e.xy as f.u.c.k. Her smoky grey eyes hold mine as I run my thumb over her sodden s.e.x. She cries out with a jerk and grips the sheets. I repeat my trace, wanting to give my full attention on her glistening arousal that"s pleading for my thickness.
I fight the urge not to bite her as I suck on her hip bone, marking her body as mine. Her breathing becomes more rapid when I run my tongue along the inside of her thigh, teasing and tantalising her. A woman"s arousal is the best scent any female could wear, and Tamzin"s is f.u.c.king flawless. "Is this what you want, Tami?"
"Please, Noel," she begs.
"But I don"t think you"re ready, Angel."
"I"ve been ready for you since yesterday!"
I ride my tongue hard along her s.e.x as her cries fill the room. I"m persistent, licking and sucking the divine meal I"ll never tire of. I want her to c.u.m hard in my mouth, trembling in a hot greedy mess as I drink every drop. I hold her down to f.u.c.k her entrance with my tongue as she withers. "Oh... oh G.o.d, Noel!" I knew it wouldn"t take her long. Her body shudders with her break, crying out for me as her sweet flavours coat my mouth.
I"m so hard it"s murderous. I rip off my jeans in lightning speed, tearing the condom from the packet to roll it on. "Come here," she gasps, pulling on my biceps to kiss me hard. My body"s on fire; I"ve never wanted to be with a woman like I have Tamzin. There is something beautifully unavoidable about her. "I think you belong to the devil. That tongue of yours is something else."
I flip her over onto her stomach and nudge her knees to part, trailing my tongue up the dip in her back. "You taste to d.a.m.n good not to use it, Tami."
"Oh G.o.d, I love it when you call me-" I don"t give her chance to finish as I plunge deep inside her, gripping her hands in the sheets with a cry. I hope to G.o.d I"ve not hurt her. I"m so overcome with everything that I don"t think I could stop now even if I tried.
"You ok?"
"Yes," she gasps, "G.o.d... you feel so good."
The feel of her takes my breath, for a second I don"t want to move. I slide into her again as her pretty silver-grey eyes catch mine. She feels incredible and my soul is wild as I rock us, stretching her soft with my hard. This woman is made for me. "You"re mine," I growl. "Tell me."
"I"m yours."
I lift her hips and the change in position causes her to moan. I thrust harder. The harder I hit the more my body climbs with the sensation that overpowers me. Harder and harder, deeper and deeper, my blood turns to fire.
Her muscles clench hard around me, coating my c.o.c.k with her heat and drawing out everything I have as I take us both to climax. I fall onto her, entwining our fingers as our heavy breathing collides. She"s a beautiful dream. Consumed by her from the night she fell into my arms. And it is in this moment whilst still deep inside her that I know I"d need more than just a month.
Noel.
We lie in a satisfied silence, Tamzin"s body is curled against mine, her head resting on my chest as I dance my fingers over her hip. She"s warm against my skin and I can"t see us doing anything else other than staying here for the rest of the night.
"I think I might take down my tree tomorrow and re-decorate it."
I tilt my head and frown. "Why?"
"Well if my reward for decorating is anything like just now then why wouldn"t I?" She laughs softly. "That was the best s.e.x of my life."
I give her a.s.s a squeeze. "You don"t need to re-do anything to get f.u.c.ked like that." I know it won"t be long before we go again. "I"m proud of you, though."
She lifts her head to meet my eyes. "For what? Surviving a beast like you?"
"No," I chuckle. "Because I could see today was hard. You don"t have to say the words for me to not know." She doesn"t answer but I know she"s thinking it over. Her instant change in att.i.tude when she saw the box made me aware and feel so many things myself that I"ve not felt in so long, but I knew it was what she needed. Shutting away memories of her past won"t change the fact her grandparents are gone.
"Noel?" Her exhausted voice is faint.
"Yes, Angel?"
"Have you ever lost anyone?" My stomach drops with her question. I knew it would be a conversation we"d exchange with her seeing my tattoo on my back, but it still hits me hard. I clear my thought and rest my arm behind my head.
"My little brother, William. He got hit by a car when he was eight. His football rolled out into the road on the estate we grew up on as kids, the driver never stopped."
Her arm that"s relaxed across my chest tightens around me. "I"m sorry. That couldn"t have been easy for you. For any of you."
"I was so confused; I was only a boy myself. I still get confused at times even now. Question if things had been different that day if he"d still be with us. But that"s something I"ll never know."
"Did they ever find the driver?"
"Eventually. He got fourteen years but no amount of time served will bring Will back. We were so close in age it took a long time to get my head around it."
"You must have been so scared," she whispers.
I was. It hit our family so hard it almost tore us apart. For years" life was a raw painful blur. My parents argued. My older brothers got into trouble at school while I cried myself to sleep each night because my best friend that slept on the bottom bunk had gone. I slept in his bed for weeks after, hoping that one night I"d wake up and he"d be stood asking what the f.u.c.k I was doing. "It"s never easy. You just learn to go with it. Cry it out, ride the storm and eventually move forward."
Silence falls between us, my fingers still tracing her body. "What"s it like?" she asks tenderly. Confused I turn my head to find her watching me.
"What"s what like?"
"Grieving. What does it feel like?"
A frown pulls my brows as I study her eyes. They are genuine with her question, which only bewilders me more. "You don"t think you"ve grieved?"
She sits up suddenly, resting her cheek on her hugged knees and looks to me. Uncertainty coats her eyes "I don"t know. I mean yes I feel different because a huge part of my life has been taken which I"ll never get back, and I miss them more than words can say it"s just... I"m still waiting to feel something. What, I"m not sure, but I just feel like I"m constantly on this merry-go-round that I can"t seem to get off. I can"t explain it. When will I get off, Noel?"
"People grieve in different ways, Tamzin. Sometimes it"s right away, for others it takes longer. Unfortunately, you"ve just got to go with it. You won"t know until it happens." I sit up beside her, brushing the hair from her shoulder. "Do you not think your issues with Christmas is to do with the grief?"
"Christmas is just a punishment I give myself." Her eyes leave mine; her voice is barely a whisper. "I don"t think I deserve one if I can"t share it with them."
"Come here." She lifts her head and I cup her jaw, placing a kiss on her lips. My girl is clearly more troubled than what I thought and I suddenly have an urge to protect her from the world. I deepen our kiss, moving her back to the mattress to rest over her, wanting to end this raw conversation with a desire we both favour.
"What if I can"t handle it, Noel?" she whispers.
"Then I"ll catch you if you should fall."
Tamzin.
"Are you ready?" Evie asks, springing her way up to my desk and stuffing her face with a mince pie. Work has been none stop today with clients and endless phone calls and the need for a hot bath and a gla.s.s of wine sounds like heaven. However, I have no idea why Evie is now perched on my desk, wrapped up in her winter coat and slouchy beanie hat.
"Ready for what?"
"Christmas shopping, the late nights start tonight remember?" She speaks as if I"ve been waiting for it all year.
"Oh Jesus, Evie, really? I"m not going shopping." I whine, annoyed at the idea of sc.r.a.pping over the last items on the shelves and bundling my way through the crowds when I"ve been on my feet since seven this morning. Not to mention the instant hot flushes you get that make you want to run for the hills and rip your clothes off. I swear sometimes my womanly hormones are older than my years.
"But you love shopping."
"Yes, clothes and shoe shopping. Not toys and wrapping paper." I close down my computer and file my notes in the cabinet. Suddenly my belly flip-flops with awareness and my eyes look up to find Noel heading towards us. It is as if my body knows of his presence before my eyes do. He stops to talk to Mr Thompson, shaking his hand and slapping each other on the back before he continues down the office floor, dominant and desirable. Moments of last night come to mind as my s.e.x awakens with the need of him. I can still feel him inside me as I walk the office floor. A night of numerous o.r.g.a.s.ms and filthy words, ending where we slept in a peaceful sweaty slumber until dawn.
"Afternoon ladies." He comes down and surprises me with a kiss. "Hi," he whispers, giving me that s.e.xy grin. "What are your plans for this evening? I could cook. Feed you and fill you." He whispers the last part. My panties are no doubt ruined as my nerves respond with the idea, my lips tuck under my teeth as I run my fingers down his tie. He truly is a picture to look at. His hard jaw and sculpted cheekbones provide a maturity, not many men his age have. His fitted suit makes him sophisticated, and undeniably s.e.xy. However, I also know what is underneath and I have to stop myself from ripping his clothes off to expose the hard lines and curves that have my hands and mouth too eager to control.
"Sounds perfect but Evie wants us to go shopping." I roll my eyes. "Can we delay it a couple hours?"
"Of course," His fingers trace circles up the inside of my thigh, my hand ready to halt him if he should get an inch closer. "Call me when you"re done and I"ll collect you. We can grab a takeout." He moves his lips to my ear. "Try not to be too long, I"ve been wanting to hear you scream for hours."
Jesus, he really needs to stop. At this rate, the only place I"ll be going is the dry cleaners. He kisses me again and says his goodbyes. Watching him leave without me stirs an unusual feeling inside. Evie is incredibly quiet. I have to stop the laugh once I see her jaw almost hitting the floor. "So if you didn"t f.u.c.k Santa the other night you definitely have now?"
"Maybe." I grin.
"Tamzin King, you dirty girl. I wondered why you were unusually perky this morning." She leans forward, checking that no one is around. "So just how big is Santa"s sack?"
My cheeks flush on a giggle. "One never divulges in one"s s.e.xual encounters." She rolls her eyes with a little wave as I add, "But it seems Santa"s sack is full of surprises and I"ve clearly been a very good girl."
"I"m not jealous in the slightest," she states, pulling her handbag over her shoulder while I b.u.t.ton up my coat.
"Believe me, babe, you should be."
"That good, huh?"
"Absolutely."
She laughs, linking her arm in mine. "Does he have a brother?"
"Married."
"s.h.i.t."
Rush hour in London is never my favourite, that along with the unpleasant mixture of Christmas mayhem and the ice cold rain is enough to put any woman in a mood. The streets are a thick carpet of wrapped up bodies in winter clothing as fairy lights all shapes and sizes laminate above us to bring joy down on the city.
There is not a fragment of joy within my soul, and the only light of happiness I had throughout my day is quickly turning to a frustration of winter blues and s.e.xual craving. And I swear to G.o.d if I hear the same Christmas song I heard six shops down I might just scream blue murder and punch the first person my fist comes into contact with.
Oxford street offers a haven for any woman with the love of fashion. From high-street to international brands this is my escape when reality gets tough. I"d spend hours" walking the shop floors to find the items I wanted in my wardrobe, but like every year at this time, tonight I am not feeling the love. The last time I walked these streets at Christmas and felt something worthwhile was with my grandparents, each spending a separate night with me whilst I helped the other find the Christmas gift they wanted to buy their loved one. Grandpa was harder to buy for than Gran. He never ate much in the form of treats as he was diabetic and the garden items he always required wasn"t this end of the city. Gran, however, was done in seconds; her love of jewellery and perfume always helped Grandpa in getting the right item with the help of me.
"What are you getting your parents this year?" I ask Evie, trying to take my mind off things.
"Ugh, I"ve got no f.u.c.king idea." She sighs. Her brown hair that falls from under her hat curls at the ends with the rain. "I was thinking a food hamper."