Next morning my mind was made up, I went over to see Ashton; found him in poorer spirits than ever. I sat down and tried to cheer him up.
He said:
"I feel more miserable this morning than ever in my life before. I have a furlough for thirty days, but I do not care to take it. I am as well here as anywhere."
I said: "I have often found that the darkest hours are many times followed by the brightest. Cheer up. I feel as if you would have some comfort before long, and see! Why, here you have a bouquet with so many "heart"s-eases" in it. Heaven grant it may be a token of coming ease and happiness. Who gave these to you? It is rarely we see them at this season."
"Sister L. gave them to me; they came from the greenhouse."
I told him I should see him again that afternoon, and taking my leave, went over to see the nurse at the armory. She came quickly forward to see me, and said:
"Have you any news----"
"I have heard of him; he was in the battle and very severely wounded, but living when my friend last heard of him."
"When was that? Where is he?" she exclaimed, hurriedly. "You know more, I can see; please tell me."
I answered her:
"I will tell you all, but I must beg of you a little confidence in return. I saw him myself, and helped to nurse him--was very much interested in him; he was terribly ill and is now very, very weak--his recovery doubtful. He has told me much of his past life. Now, will you not tell me what he is to you, for I see you are deeply moved?"
"Did he tell you anything of the girl who drove him off without a kind word--heaping upon him reproaches and wounding his n.o.ble heart to the core? If he did, it was I. Oh, how I have suffered since! Even when I accused him of cowardice and treachery, in my heart I was proud of him. Oh! tell me where he is, that I may go to him. I have been looking for him every moment since the battle. Take me, please?"
"He is at the "Douglas," but very sick; I saw him not two hours ago. I fear any sudden shock, even of joy. You are never absent from his mind: he has never mentioned your name, but he has told me much. Now, tell me, will you not, how it is you are here? And then we most devise a plan to take you to him without too great a shock."
She said:
"These black robes are for my brother. He bade me do what I could for the suffering and wounded on both sides, and find Paul. I will give you a letter I received written by him a few days previous to his death. After you have read it you will then understand better why I am here."
And leaving the ward for a few moments she returned and handed me the letter. The writing plainly told that the writer was very weak. I give it to you, my dear reader, every word; I could not do justice by relating in my own style:
SISTER--I am wounded, and must die. I have felt it for several days. The doctor and the kind boys try to cheer me up, but I"ve been growing weaker daily. The suffering in my breast is terrible. I had a Minnie ball pa.s.s through my left lung. I have been very much frightened about dying, and wanted to live; but last night I had a dream which has produced a great change. Now I feel sure I shall die, and am content. I am with the Union boys; they are very kind. The one next me fanned me and rubbed my side until I fell asleep last night, and slept better than I have since I"ve been wounded. Now, darling sister, here is my dream: I thought I had been fighting, and having been wounded, was carried off the field and was laid under a large tree; after being there a little while I felt some one clasp my hand; looking up, I found Paul, He also had been wounded.
He handed me his canteen, and while drinking I seemed to get quite easy. There seemed to be a great mist all over us; I could see nothing for a little while. Again I heard my name called, and looking up, found the mist had cleared away, and our great-grandfather (whom I knew well, from the old portrait, which we used to be so proud of, father telling us he was one of the signers of the "Declaration") was standing before me, but he did not look smiling like the face of the picture; but, oh! so sad and stern. In his hand he had a beautiful wreath of ivy, which he, stooping, placed on the brow of Paul, saying, "Live, boy--your country wants you;" and stretching forth his hand, he drew me to a stand near him on which stood our old family Bible, ink and pen. He opened to the births, and putting his finger on my name, he raised the pen and marked a heavy black line over the H, and was proceeding, when his hand was caught by our old nurse, Mammy Chloe, who has been dead years, you know, who pointed over toward the west of us, and there stood a large shining cross with these words over it, "Unless ye forgive men their trespa.s.ses, how can your Heavenly Father forgive you?" And coming up to me, put forth her hand and beckoned me to follow her. Then the old gentleman spoke and said, "Your blood will blot out your disgrace;" and turning the leaf, he pointed to the "Deaths," and I read, "On the 28th of September, 1862, Harry Clay Mason, aged 21;" and then I woke up. This is the 20th; I think I shall live until that day. Now I bid you go carry mother to somewhere North, to Paul"s friends; they will be kind to her and try to comfort her, and go you and devote yourself to the suffering soldiers, and find Paul, if possible; he will live, I know; tell him how I loved him, yet, and honored him, although I thought him wrong.
Tell him good-by. And to mother, try to soften this blow as much as possible. Tell her I am happy now. I think G.o.d will pardon me for my sins, for His Son"s sake. There is a boy from my regiment expecting to be parolled, and he has promised to deliver this to you. Good-by. G.o.d bless you, darling. Lovingly,
HARRY.
Fairfax, Va.
I was much affected. After a few moments I said: "How long did he live?"
"He lived, seemingly growing much better, until the afternoon of the twenty-eighth. He was then taken with hemorrhage and so pa.s.sed away."
And pushing her hair back from her temples, she said:
"These came the night I got that letter." And I saw the numberless white hairs gleaming amid her raven locks. I said:
"Come, we will go to him. I think you had better write a little note to him; you know best what to say, but do not tell him you are here just yet, but something to set his heart at peace; and I will tell him it was given me by a Southerner I found in the hospital."
"Yes," she said; "you are very thoughtful, that is just the thing."
And she went into the ante-room, and soon came out, and giving me the note, said:
"You know all; read it."
And I read: "Paul, forgive and love me again. I shall try to come to you soon."
So we proceeded to the "Douglas," and I went in, found Dr. B., told him and asked if we might venture in. He thought better to break it gently at first, and promising to stay near in case of being needed, laughingly said to Miss Mason:
"Now, if I was a doctor of divinity, I should be wishing to be sent for."
Leaving her in his charge, I went in.
"Back so soon?" Ashton said. "How bright and cheerful you look!"
I sat down and said, "Yes, I have some pleasant news; I have a letter for you; I met with a Southerner who knew a friend of yours, who gave me this for you. It may be from your aunt, and you may hear from your lady love, possibly."
He caught the letter, tore off the envelope, and read. I was frightened--he never spoke a word or moved. Then, "Thank G.o.d!" burst forth in heart-felt tones.
I saw he was all right. I said:
"You must now commence to think of her coming and being with you, for it is some time since that person left the South, and you may look for her any time. I was told that the family were intimate with Mr. Davis, and they were to have a "pa.s.s" North to find "the son." I then told him I had wanted to prepare him, for she was really in Washington, and I had met her--she had given me the note for him. He seemed to divine all, and said:
"Bring her to me. I am strong and well now."
I sent the attendant to Dr. B."s room, and in a few moments she was beside him.
"Forgiven!" she murmured; and, bending, pressed her lips to his pale forehead, and taking his hand, she sat on the cot beside him. There was little said, but
"Eyes looked love to eyes that spake again."
So they remained until the sun went down and it was getting quite dark, when Dr. B. came in and said:
"Ah, Ashton, you have a more skillful physician than I. She has done more for you in five minutes than I have for as many weeks, I guess you will take that furlough and commission now, Lieutenant Ashton."
He took Dr. B."s hand, and said:
"Under G.o.d, doctor, by your skillful hand and great kindness, with the attentions of the good friends here, I have been kept alive for this day."
Emma Mason bade him good-night, saying she must go over to her boys again, and get her discharge from the surgeon in charge.
In three days Ashton bade adieu to his friends in the "Douglas," and with Miss Mason, Dr. B. and myself, he got into the carriage waiting, directing the driver to stop at the residence of the Rev. Dr. Smith.
There they were united, and received our heart-felt congratulations, and proceeded to the cars, which soon bore them to their friends North.
A few days ago a servant came to my room, bringing a card.
I read: "Paul Ashton and wife."
I almost flew down to them. They were on their way South to settle up their property and provide for the old servants who remained there.
Paul had returned to the army and remained until the close of the war, having reached the rank of colonel. He is looking very well. He has been offered a commission in the regular service, but his wife says his country had him when he was needed, but she must have him now.