I really like Happy Together, especially the small things.

 

“I feel horrible.”

 

Tony Leung was sick in bed with a fever from going on a morning jog with the self-willed Leslie Cheung, but the culprit in question begged and pleaded, forcing the sick man to cook for him.

 

“I’m starving though!”

 

“What’s wrong with you? How could you make a sick person cook for you?!”

 

Yet, despite the chef’s complaining, he still added an egg in after a few second’s hesitation.

 

It’s because of these little things.

 

It was really late when we finished watching the film. He did a stretch as if he was in his own home.

 

“Know what I like about this movie?”

 

I looked at him.

 

“Lai Yiu-fai is so fortunate to be able to write to his dad and even have the chance to ask for forgiveness and start again,” he said this with a squinty smile.

 

You don’t have family, so you can’t start again—is that it?

 

I could not help but feel bad.

 

“Tsk. Look at your frown. Did you believe me? It was a lie, you dummy. I ain’t got no dad or mom.” He was giggling, looking all delighted.

 

Then he pursed his lips and continued seriously, “I just like Tony Leung. He’s such a caring person. If I were Ho Po-wing, I’d follow him ‘til the end of the world.”

 

If you were Ho Po-wing?

 

You–

 

“Ge, I like men,” he said under his breath.

 

I looked at him while he looked at the floor. He had really long lashes.

 

My mouth was dry.

 

Really? Me, too.

 

“Ge, I like you.” He looked up and gazed at me. His words were still very faint but each syllable knocked into my heart.

 

My face was burning and I cast my eyes elsewhere to evade those pretty, opaque, black eyes of his.

 

I gulped nervously.

 

Me… Me, too.

 

He reached over and latched onto my collar.

 

“What about you?”

 

I didn’t reply to him.

 

“I thought you were a good person. And I was right.”

 

Still no reply.

 

 “Come spoil me with your love, won’t you?”

 

I was still silent.

 

I wanted to cry. I really wanted to cry.

 

He started wiping at the tears that had already rolled down my face and was a bit caught off guard.

 

“I–. Hey, don’t cry! I…”

 

I held him tight, a child who was younger but stronger than me. His shoulders were even wider than mine.

 

He was shaking all over as he held me back even tighter. We parted only when I could not breathe properly.

 

We looked into each other’s eyes, two black and the other two pink from crying, and I felt a little awkward.

 

“You have bunny eyes.” It sounded like he was teasing me.

 

I bit my lips, not because I was sad this time but because I was angry. I hadn’t cried for, what, twenty years?

 

We were fighting in this room just before. He used to be… Who would have known this day would come?

 

He stared at me like a vulture staring at a dead body.

 

I got even angrier. I was older than him, all right?

 

He lunged towards me and hugged me again.

 

I really had zero experience. Experience with intimacy, I mean. But I found out then that it was very cozy.

 

His scent was one of a boy’s, the scent of youth.

 

With his head on my shoulder, he murmured, “I really like you. I have for a long time.”

 

“Mhm.”

 

“You knew?” He pushed us apart and pouted.

 

“Huh?” I didn’t. I had no idea how things came to be the way they were. Had he liked me before? That little thug with the sticky, yellow hair who caused a ruckus in my shop every other day or so? Somehow I was not too surprised.

 

Without much thought, I patted his head. It was just a head of short, fuzzy hair but it looked cleaner this way.

 

He blushed a little and hid back into my arms.

 

“I just knew you were the same as me. But I wouldn’t have had to go through all that if only I knew you’d be this easy. I should’ve just went for it back then.”

 

Went for it? Back then? Hah, I’d like to see you try to go for it when I karate chop you to death.

 

“Yo, I know even if you don’t say it. You looked down on me back then. Would act like you saw a ghost or somethin’.”

 

He tightened his grip and my waist started hurting from his constraint. I wiggled around but he wouldn’t let go.

 

“Ouch!” I felt a sharp pain on my shoulder: the b.a.s.t.a.r.d bit me. “Are you a dog or something?!”

 

“Oh, now you talk?”

 

His scorching gaze, his black eyes seemed to glow faintly but I could not see the bottom of them.

 

“Qian Jiying, let’s do it.”

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