I had all his attention again. "Is that what she _is_?"
"Then don"t you, with your opportunities, know?" I was conscious of rather an inspiration, a part of which was to be jocose. "What are you trying," I laughed, "to get out of me?"
It struck me luckily that, though he remained as proof against gaiety as ever, he was, thanks to his preoccupation, not disagreeably affected by my tone. "Of course if you"ve no idea, I can get nothing."
"No idea of what?"
Then it was that I at last got it straight. "Well, of what"s the matter with her."
"Is there anything particular? If there _is_," I went on, "there"s something that I"ve got out of _you_!"
"How so, if you don"t know what it is?"
"Do you mean if you yourself don"t?" But without detaining him on this, "Of what in especial do the signs," I asked, "consist?"
"Well, of everyone"s thinking so--that there"s something or other."
This again struck me, but it struck me too much. "Oh, everyone"s a fool!"
He saw, in his queer wan way, how it had done so. "Then you _have_ your own idea?"
I daresay my smile at him, while I waited, showed a discomfort. "Do you mean people are talking about her?"
But he waited himself. "Haven"t they shown you----?"
"No, no one has spoken. Moreover I wouldn"t have let them."
"Then there you _are_!" Brissenden exclaimed. "If you"ve kept them off, it must be because you differ with them."
"I shan"t be sure of that," I returned, "till I know what they think!
However, I repeat," I added, "that I shouldn"t even then care. I don"t mind admitting that she much interests me."
"There you are, there you are!" he said again.
"That"s all that"s the matter with her so far as _I_"m concerned. You see, at any rate, how little it need make her afraid of me. She"s lovely and she"s gentle and she"s happy."
My friend kept his eyes on me. "What is there to interest you so in that? Isn"t it a description that applies here to a dozen other women?
You can"t say, you know, that you"re interested in _them_, for you just spoke of them as so many fools."
There was a certain surprise for me in so much acuteness, which, however, doubtless admonished me as to the need of presence of mind. "I wasn"t thinking of the ladies--I was thinking of the men."
"That"s amiable to _me_," he said with his gentle gloom.
"Oh, my dear Brissenden, I except "you.""
"And why should you?"
I felt a trifle pushed. "I"ll tell you some other time. And among the ladies I except Mrs. Brissenden, with whom, as you may have noticed, I"ve been having much talk."
"And will you tell me some other time about that too?" On which, as I but amicably shook my head for no, he had his first dimness of pleasantry. "I"ll get it then from my wife."
"Never. She won"t tell you."
"She has pa.s.sed you her word? That won"t alter the fact that she tells me everything."
He really said it in a way that made me take refuge for an instant in looking at my watch. "Are you going back to tea? If you are, I"ll, in spite of my desire to roam, walk twenty steps with you." I had already again put my hand into his arm, and we strolled for a little till I threw off that I was sure Mrs. Server was waiting for him. To this he replied that if I wished to get rid of him he was as willing to take that as anything else for granted--an observation that I, on my side, answered with an inquiry, though an inquiry that had nothing to do with it. "Do you also tell everything to Mrs. Brissenden?"
It brought him up shorter than I had expected. "Do you ask me that in order that I shan"t speak to her of this?"
I showed myself at a loss. "Of "this"----?"
"Why, of what we"ve made out----"
"About Mrs. Server, you and I? You must act as to that, my dear fellow, quite on your own discretion. All the more that what on earth _have_ we made out? I a.s.sure you I haven"t a secret to confide to you about her, except that I"ve never seen a person more unquenchably radiant."
He almost jumped at it. "Well, that"s just it!"
"But just what?"
"Why, what they"re all talking about. That she _is_ so awfully radiant.
That she"s so tremendously happy. It"s the question," he explained, "of what in the world she has to make her so."
I winced a little, but tried not to show it. "My dear man, how do _I_ know?"
"She _thinks_ you know," he after a moment answered.
I could only stare. "Mrs. Server thinks I know what makes her happy?" I the more easily represented such a conviction as monstrous in that it truly had its surprise for me.
But Brissenden now was all with his own thought. "She _isn"t_ happy."
"You mean that that"s what"s the matter with her under her appearance----? Then what makes the appearance so extraordinary?"
"Why, exactly what I mention--that one doesn"t see anything whatever in her to correspond to it."
I hesitated. "Do you mean in her circ.u.mstances?"
"Yes--or in her character. Her circ.u.mstances are nothing wonderful. She has none too much money; she has had three children and lost them; and n.o.body that belongs to her appears ever to have been particularly nice to her."
I turned it over. "How you _do_ get on with her!"
"Do you call it getting on with her to be the more bewildered the more I see her?"
"Isn"t to say you"re bewildered only, on the whole, to say you"re charmed? That always--doesn"t it?--describes more or less any engrossed relation with a lovely lady."
"Well, I"m not sure I"m so charmed." He spoke as if he had thought this particular question over for himself; he had his way of being lucid without brightness. "I"m not at all easily charmed, you know," he the next moment added; "and I"m not a fellow who goes about much after women."
"Ah, that I never supposed! Why in the world _should_ you? It"s the last thing!" I laughed. "But isn"t this--quite (what shall one call it?) innocently--rather a peculiar case?"