SIR OLIVER. Yes--yes--our young Rake has parted with his Ancestors like old Tapestry--sold Judges and Generals by the foot--and maiden Aunts as cheap as broken China.--
ROWLEY. And here has he commissioned me to re-deliver you Part of the purchase-money--I mean tho" in your necessitous character of old Stanley----
MOSES. Ah! there is the Pity of all! He is so d.a.m.ned charitable.
ROWLEY. And I left a Hosier and two Tailors in the Hall--who I"m sure won"t be paid, and this hundred would satisfy "em.
SIR OLIVER. Well--well--I"ll pay his debts and his Benevolences too--I"ll take care of old Stanley--myself-- But now I am no more a Broker, and you shall introduce me to the elder Brother as Stanley----
ROWLEY. Not yet a while--Sir Peter I know means to call there about this time.
Enter TRIP
TRIP. O Gentlemen--I beg Pardon for not showing you out--this way-- Moses, a word.
[Exit TRIP with MOSES.]
SIR OLIVER. There"s a Fellow for you-- Would you believe it that Puppy intercepted the Jew, on our coming, and wanted to raise money before he got to his master!
ROWLEY. Indeed!
SIR OLIVER. Yes--they are now planning an annuity Business-- Ah Master Rowley[,] in my Day Servants were content with the Follies of their Masters when they were worn a little Thread Bare but now they have their Vices like their Birth Day cloaths with the gloss on.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE III.--A Library
SURFACE and SERVANT
SURFACE. No letter from Lady Teazle?
SERVANT. No Sir--
SURFACE. I am surprised she hasn"t sent if she is prevented from coming--! Sir Peter certainly does not suspect me--yet I wish I may not lose the Heiress, thro" the sc.r.a.pe I have drawn myself in with the wife--However, Charles"s imprudence and bad character are great Points in my Favour.
SERVANT. Sir--I believe that must be Lady Teazle--
SURFACE. Hold[!] see--whether it is or not before you go to the Door--I have a particular Message for you if it should be my Brother.
SERVANT. "Tis her ladyship Sir--She always leaves her Chair at the milliner"s in the next Street.
SURFACE. Stay--stay--draw that Screen before the Window--that will do--my opposite Neighbour is a maiden Lady of so curious a temper!-- [SERVANT draws the screen and exit.]
I have a difficult Hand to play in this Affair--Lady Teazle as lately suspected my Views on Maria--but She must by no means be let into that secret, at least till I have her more in my Power.
Enter LADY TEAZLE
LADY TEAZLE. What[!] Sentiment in soliloquy--have you been very impatient now?--O Lud! don"t pretend to look grave--I vow I couldn"t come before----
SURFACE. O Madam[,] Punctuality is a species of Constancy, a very unfashionable quality in a Lady.
LADY TEAZLE. Upon my word you ought to pity me, do you now Sir Peter is grown so ill-tempered to me of Late! and so jealous! of Charles too that"s the best of the story isn"t it?
SURFACE. I am glad my scandalous Friends keep that up. [Aside.]
LADY TEAZLE. I am sure I wish He would let Maria marry him-- and then perhaps He would be convinced--don"t you--Mr. Surface?
SURFACE. Indeed I do not.--[Aside.] O certainly I do--for then my dear Lady Teazle would also be convinced how wrong her suspicions were of my having any design on the silly Girl----
LADY TEAZLE. Well--well I"m inclined to believe you--besides I really never could perceive why she should have so any admirers.
SURFACE. O for her Fortune--nothing else--
LADY TEAZLE. I believe so for tho" she is certainly very pretty-- yet she has no conversation in the world--and is so grave and reserved--that I declare I think she"d have made an excellent wife for Sir Peter.--
SURFACE. So she would.
LADY TEAZLE. Then--one never hears her speak ill of anybody--which you know is mighty dull--
SURFACE. Yet she doesn"t want understanding--
LADY TEAZLE. No more she does--yet one is always disapointed when one hears [her] speak--For though her Eyes have no kind of meaning in them--she very seldom talks Nonsense.
SURFACE. Nay--nay surely--she has very fine eyes--
LADY TEAZLE. Why so she has--tho" sometimes one fancies there"s a little sort of a squint--
SURFACE. A squint--O fie--Lady Teazle.
LADY TEAZLE. Yes yes--I vow now--come there is a left-handed Cupid in one eye--that"s the Truth on"t.
SURFACE. Well--his aim is very direct however--but Lady Sneerwell has quite corrupted you.
LADY TEAZLE. No indeed--I have not opinion enough of her to be taught by her, and I know that she has lately rais"d many scandalous hints of me--which you know one always hears from one common Friend, or other.
SURFACE. Why to say truth I believe you are not more obliged to her than others of her acquaintance.
LADY TEAZLE. But isn"t [it] provoking to hear the most ill-natured Things said to one and there"s my friend Lady Sneerwell has circulated I don"t know how many scandalous tales of me, and all without any foundation, too; that"s what vexes me.
SURFACE. Aye Madam to be sure that is the Provoking circ.u.mstance-- without Foundation--yes yes--there"s the mortification indeed-- for when a slanderous story is believed against one--there certainly is no comfort like the consciousness of having deserved it----
LADY TEAZLE. No to be sure--then I"d forgive their malice-- but to attack me, who am really so innocent--and who never say an ill-natured thing of anybody--that is, of any Friend--!
and then Sir Peter too--to have him so peevish--and so suspicious-- when I know the integrity of my own Heart--indeed "tis monstrous.
SURFACE. But my dear Lady Teazle "tis your own fault if you suffer it--when a Husband entertains a groundless suspicion of his Wife and withdraws his confidence from her--the original compact is broke and she owes it to the Honour of her s.e.x to endeavour to outwit him--
LADY TEAZLE. Indeed--So that if He suspects me without cause it follows that the best way of curing his jealousy is to give him reason for"t--
SURFACE. Undoubtedly--for your Husband [should] never be deceived in you--and in that case it becomes you to be frail in compliment to his discernment--