LADY TEAZLE. Go--you are an insinuating Hypocrite--but we shall be miss"d--let us join the company.
SURFACE. True, but we had best not return together.
LADY TEAZLE. Well don"t stay--for Maria shan"t come to hear any more of your Reasoning, I promise you-- [Exit.]
SURFACE. A curious Dilemma truly my Politics have run me into.
I wanted at first only to ingratiate myself with Lady Teazle that she might not be my enemy with Maria--and I have I don"t know how-- become her serious Lover, so that I stand a chance of Committing a Crime I never meditated--and probably of losing Maria by the Pursuit!--Sincerely I begin to wish I had never made such a Point of gaining so very good a character, for it has led me into so many curst Rogueries that I doubt I shall be exposed at last.
[Exit.]
SCENE III.--At SIR PETER"S
--ROWLEY and SIR OLIVER--
SIR OLIVER. Ha! ha! ha! and so my old Friend is married, hey?-- a young wife out of the country!--ha! ha! that he should have stood Bluff to old Bachelor so long and sink into a Husband at last!
ROWLEY. But you must not rally him on the subject Sir Oliver--"tis a tender Point I a.s.sure you though He has been married only seven months.
SIR OLIVER. Ah then he has been just half a year on the stool of Repentance--Poor Peter! But you say he has entirely given up Charles--never sees him, hey?
ROWLEY. His Prejudice against him is astonishing--and I am sure greatly increased by a jealousy of him with Lady Teazle--which he has been industriously led into by a scandalous Society-- in the neighbourhood--who have contributed not a little to Charles"s ill name. Whereas the truth is[,] I believe[,] if the lady is partial to either of them his Brother is the Favourite.
SIR OLIVER. Aye--I know--there are a set of malicious prating prudent Gossips both male and Female, who murder characters to kill time, and will rob a young Fellow of his good name before He has years to know the value of it. . . but I am not to be prejudiced against my nephew by such I promise you! No! no--if Charles has done nothing false or mean, I shall compound for his extravagance.
ROWLEY. Then my life on"t, you will reclaim him. Ah, Sir, it gives me new vigour to find that your heart is not turned against him-- and that the son of my good old master has one friend however left--
SIR OLIVER. What! shall I forget Master Rowley--when I was at his house myself--egad my Brother and I were neither of us very prudent youths--and yet I believe you have not seen many better men than your old master was[.]
ROWLEY. "Tis this Reflection gives me a.s.surance that Charles may yet be a credit to his Family--but here comes Sir Peter----
SIR OLIVER. Egad so He does--mercy on me--He"s greatly altered-- and seems to have a settled married look--one may read Husband in his Face at this Distance.--
Enter SIR PETER
SIR PETER. Ha! Sir Oliver--my old Friend--welcome to England-- a thousand Times!
SIR OLIVER. Thank you--thank you--Sir Peter--and Efaith I am as glad to find you well[,] believe me--
SIR PETER. Ah! "tis a long time since we met--sixteen year I doubt Sir Oliver--and many a cross accident in the Time--
SIR OLIVER. Aye I have had my share--but, what[!] I find you are married--hey my old Boy--well--well it can"t be help"d--and so I wish you joy with all my heart--
SIR PETER. Thank you--thanks Sir Oliver.--Yes, I have entered into the happy state but we"ll not talk of that now.
SIR OLIVER. True true Sir Peter old Friends shouldn"t begin on grievances at first meeting. No, no--
ROWLEY. Take care pray Sir----
SIR OLIVER. Well--so one of my nephews I find is a wild Rogue--hey?
SIR PETER. Wild!--oh! my old Friend--I grieve for your disappointment there--He"s a lost young man indeed--however his Brother will make you amends; Joseph is indeed what a youth should be--everybody in the world speaks well of him--
SIR OLIVER. I am sorry to hear it--he has too good a character to be an honest Fellow. Everybody speaks well of him! Psha! then He has bow"d as low to Knaves and Fools as to the honest dignity of Virtue.
SIR PETER. What Sir Oliver do you blame him for not making Enemies?
SIR OLIVER. Yes--if He has merit enough to deserve them.
SIR PETER. Well--well--you"ll be convinced when you know him--"tis edification to hear him converse--he professes the n.o.blest Sentiments.
SIR OLIVER. Ah plague on his Sentiments--if he salutes me with a sc.r.a.p sentence of morality in his mouth I shall be sick directly-- but however don"t mistake me Sir Peter I don"t mean to defend Charles"s Errors--but before I form my judgment of either of them, I intend to make a trial of their Hearts--and my Friend Rowley and I have planned something for the Purpose.
ROWLEY. And Sir Peter shall own he has been for once mistaken.
SIR PETER. My life on Joseph"s Honour----
SIR OLIVER. Well come give us a bottle of good wine--and we"ll drink the Lads" Healths and tell you our scheme.
SIR PETER. Alons [Allons], then----
SIR OLIVER. But don"t Sir Peter be so severe against your old Friend"s son.
SIR PETER. "Tis his Vices and Follies have made me his Enemy.--
ROWLEY. Come--come--Sir Peter consider how early He was left to his own guidance.
SIR OLIVER. Odds my Life--I am not sorry that He has run out of the course a little--for my Part, I hate to see dry Prudence clinging to the green juices of youth--"tis like ivy round a sapling and spoils the growth of the Tree.
END OF THE SECOND ACT
ACT III
SCENE I.--At SIR PETER"S
SIR PETER, SIR OLIVER, and ROWLEY
SIR PETER. Well, then, we will see the Fellows first and have our wine afterwards.--but how is this, Master Rowley--I don"t see the Jet of your scheme.
ROWLEY. Why Sir--this Mr. Stanley whom I was speaking of, is nearly related to them by their mother. He was once a merchant in Dublin-- but has been ruined by a series of undeserved misfortunes--and now lately coming over to solicit the a.s.sistance of his friends here-- has been flyng [flung] into prison by some of his Creditors-- where he is now with two helpless Boys.--
SIR OLIVER. Aye and a worthy Fellow too I remember him. But what is this to lead to--?
ROWLEY. You shall hear--He has applied by letter both to Mr. Surface and Charles--from the former he has received nothing but evasive promises of future service, while Charles has done all that his extravagance has left him power to do--and He is at this time endeavouring to raise a sum of money--part of which, in the midst of his own distresses, I know He intends for the service of poor Stanley.
SIR OLIVER. Ah! he is my Brother"s Son.