Chapter 29A
Ming Chong looked at w.a.n.g Heng with red eyes. His hands were clenched so tightly they were white. He suppressed his feelings with extreme effort and said through clenched teeth, "He has never told me about this."
w.a.n.g Heng turned his head to look at Ye Ming. His eyes were filled with deep emotions and he said lowly, "That"s probably because he wanted to leave me the last bit of dignity.."
Ye Ming had previously been completely quiet. At this time he said lightly, "You were only momentarily impulsive, in the end you didn"t really do anything to me. And also…. this isn"t the kind of matter to go around telling people about."
The admittance of what happened in this sentence made Ming Chong"s rationality break! He stood up and marched towards w.a.n.g Heng. At this moment his anger made him see red and he wanted to kill this person! He lifted his fist and was about to punch him!
w.a.n.g Heng knew that by telling him this today, Ming Chong wouldn"t be able to let him off lightly. He kept still and waited for Ming Chong"s blow. This was the same time of helplessness that Ming Chong once experienced ba… he was the one at fault, it didn"t make sense to let Ye Ming shoulder the blame.
He laughed mockingly to himself and didn"t intend on fighting back.
But just as the blow was about to land on w.a.n.g Heng"s face, Ye Ming suddenly grabbed Ming Chong"s hand and said to him coldly. "Stop it."
Ye Ming didn"t use a lot of force and Ming Chong should have been able to throw him off but for some reason he didn"t do this… instead he slowly turned his head and said with a frozen face, hoa.r.s.e voice and eyes filled with pain, "He did something so horrible to you and you still want to protect him?"
Ye Ming"s expression was peaceful. He smiled gently. "Five years have already pa.s.sed and I have already let it go. What"s the point of settling the score now. Don"t forget, right now we don"t have any relationship anymore."
Ming Chong"s face went white.
Ye Ming looked at him coldly and said, "And also the things you are doing now are ten times worse than him. What right do you have to judge him?"
These light words were like a sharp arrow stabbing straight into Ming Chong"s heart. Just then had received so much information and now his heart was in a huge chaos, and these words were like the last straw that broke the camel"s back! He could barely stand straight!
So from the beginning to the end, he had only misunderstood Ye Ming?
How could this be real? But what reason did w.a.n.g Heng have to lie to him? Could he be just trying to help free Ye Ming and made it up?
Ming Chong"s heart was in chaos and momentarily he couldn"t think straight. He wanted to believe w.a.n.g Heng"s words but he also felt it was too ridiculous. If he believed it then it meant that everything he had held onto these few years were completely turned upside down.
If in the beginning it had all just been a misunderstanding, then what was all his hate and pain these years for? Wouldn"t it all be a joke?
Mng Chong"s expression was fragile. Suddenly he didn"t know what to say. In the end he could only murmur, "Why didn"t you tell me….."
Ye Ming saw the state he was in and lightly sighed. "Five years have pa.s.sed and you"re still so impulsive… if I told you back then, what would you have done?"
Ming Chong clenched his fist again. Of course he would have killed that guy!
Ye Ming"s eyes showed that"s just what he expected. He said, "You would go looking for trouble with him. But back then you wouldn"t have been able to do anything to him… so that"s why I thought it was better not to tell you. I thought I could handle it on my own and I didn"t want event to create distance between us and affect our relationship. But it seems I was wrong. Hiding it only made the misunderstanding worse."
Ye Ming turned his head and looked at w.a.n.g Heng. "Back then I did blame you. But in the end we were once lovers and nothing actually happened… and some things if you say it too openly only makes everyone involved awkward, so that"s why I didn"t say it. It wasn"t all just for you."
He had long past the age of impulsive pa.s.sion where his head was only full of romance. The way he dealt with things showed he understood nothing was black and white, and that he could weigh the pros and cons.
If he had told Ming Chong then it would only cause both Ming Chong and w.a.n.g Heng to suffer. At that time Ming Chong wasn"t w.a.n.g Heng"s opponent, if he went to look for him he had a high chance of being humiliated in return. And if things became too big and noisy, then in the end he and w.a.n.g Heng"s appearance of friendship couldn"t be kept and everyone would lose face… so that"s why he thought it was better not to speak and just let the event pa.s.s quietly on its own.
It was shame that it still got to this point.
Because of his words, w.a.n.g Heng felt both guilty and disappointed. However he could only say, "I"m sorry."
Ye Ming shook his head. He turned his head slightly and at an angle where Ming Chong couldn"t see, he indicated with his eyes at w.a.n.g Heng. He said, "It"s all in the past now and I don"t mind anymore. You should go, thank you for everything that you"ve done for me… but the reason we broke up has nothing to do with you."
w.a.n.g Heng saw the message in Ye Ming"s eyes and understood his meaning.
Right now if he stayed he couldn"t obtain anything good. Since he had determined Ye Ming"s location, he could only help him if he left. After all he couldn"t be sure whether Ming Chong could really think things through and let Ye Ming go.
Right now Ming Chong"s state was clearly very unpredictable and he looked as though he was embroiled in some kind of turmoil. If he could do something like this then he couldn"t be judged from a rational perspective.
w.a.n.g Heng paused and said to Ming Chong. "The reason I came today is to tell you this. You think about it carefully and don"t keep troubling XuanWen. No matter what happened back then, at least he never really hurt you, isn"t that right?"
Ming Chong"s eyes went dark and after some time he spat out, "Take him out."
The bodyguards immediately took w.a.n.g Heng outside and then closed the door.
Now there was only two people left in the room. Ming Chong looked at Ye Ming. His lips were pressed together in a line and his eyes were filled with pain and conflict. He said slowly, "Why didn"t you tell me earlier. That way I wouldn"t have…"
Ye Ming didn"t wait for him to finish speaking and just laughed. He raised the corner of his lips: "When you came back didn"t I apologize to you? Didn"t I explain to you? But no matter what you wouldn"t believe it. If I told you this kind of hard to speak reason, then would you just believe it? Or would you more likely just think I had made up something to lie to you?"
Ming Chong"s entire body felt cold. If in the beginning Ye Ming told him this would he have believed him? Probably it would be just as he said, he would only think it was another excuse…. Back then he only believe the evidence of his eyes, and was filled with distrust and hate. That was the reason he didn"t want to believe Ye Miing"s explanations.
And back then Ye Ming"s insincere words only made him feel that Ye Ming didn"t love him enough.
Because he had already confirmed the "truth" in his heart, no matter how much Ye Ming explained to him what had actually happened, he didn"t believe it. Clearly Ye Ming had denied it before…. {T/N: He"s referring to the fact that YM did in fact tell him that nothing happened between him and WH but because YM didn"t go into the details, it only seemed like an insincere excuse.}
Ye Ming didn"t have any intention of blaming him. Instead he said coldly, "And what happened back then was only known to w.a.n.g Heng and myself. Words are cheap, even right now you probably don"t 100% believe it right? It"s only that you think w.a.n.g Heng doesn"t have any reason to lie to you."
Ming Chong"s lips moved and his eyes were red. After some time he said hoa.r.s.ely, "What w.a.n.g Heng said… about you telling him that you wanted to settle down with me, is it true?"
Ye Ming paused for a moment, then nodded.
Ming Chong suddenly laughed crazily. If everything was true then it was all because he had misunderstood taking the surface appearance as the "truth", stubbornly believed this person betrayed him and didn"t love him, and in the end did all those things to him….
What was this? Wasn"t this the greatest joke under the heavens!?
This person had always loved him. Five years ago he could have obtained him, but because of his laughable suspicions and fragile pride, he had thrown away everything?
Why?!!!!
[Ding! Ming Chong"s blackening -20, the current blackening value 25.]
Ming Chong tightened and released his fist repeatedly by his side. He looked fixedly at Ye Ming and his eyes were fragile. "Then when you said you love me…. it was also true right…"
This time Ye Ming didn"t respond for a long time. Just when Ming Chong was about to despair, he finally opened his mouth. His voice was quiet and at the same time had some inexplicable emotion. He said, "I loved you."
When Ming Chong had just returned, he did love him. And he had done all he could to win him back… but now that they had gone through all these things, there probably wasn"t any way for him to continue this relationship.
Just like back then he couldn"t walk to the end with Ming Chong, right now he also couldn"t. Trust was the fundamental problem between the two of them.
In this world there were many people who loved each other who couldn"t walk to the end with each other. It wasn"t any one person"s fault. Sometimes it was just a case of misunderstanding, or a lie…. or just an opportunity missed because of a mistake….
Ming Chong stumbled backwards. Those three words practically turned all the bones in his body to dust.
It was more painful by ten thousand times than Ye Ming simply telling him he didn"t love him.
What had he done? Clearly Ye Ming had told him that he loved him, and had tried to explain things to him, but why hadn"t he believed it? Why did he stubbornly do those things to him?
He had pushed away this person with his own hands.
Ming Chong"s eyes were red and there was a crazed despair in his expression. His voice was raspy and he said slowly, "We can… start again."
This time I won"t misunderstand you.
Ye Ming smiled. That smile was somewhat mocking. He said, "Ming Chong, don"t you understand yet? No matter what, it"s over between us. Today you believe me but what about tomorrow? And the day after that? What about one month later, one year later?"
"Can you promise me that you won"t get suspicious over some other strange clues or hints? Can you really promise me that you won"t doubt my intentions again?"
"I have also gone through a lot of things and right now I finally understand. The crux of the problem between us… is lack of trust."
"A lifetime was a long time and in this lifetime you will experience many things and meet many people. There will definitely be a day when some other issue will arise, where we will argue and get angry with each other. There will definitely be things we don"t like about each other."
Ye Ming looked at him deeply. "At that time, can you really be sure that you won"t misunderstand me? That you won"t be suspicious of me?"
It"s not that I can"t love you, it"s that you don"t believe in my love. Three inches of ice isn"t something that can be melted in one day. Probably from a long, long time ago… in your heart you never really trusted me. Although not everything is your fault, and perhaps some of my actions were questionable… however my feelings for you never wavered.
However you didn"t believe it.
And I"m finally tired of all your suspicions.
Ming Chong looked into Ye Ming"s eyes. He had never so clearly understood that he might lose this person.
And this time he couldn"t blame Ye Ming. In the end, after many twists and turns, it turns out he was the one that was the most wrong.
He suddenly recalled the moments of that time. Even if a thousand days and nights had pa.s.sed, that scene was still carved into his memory. He remembered every expression on Ye Ming"s face, every change of inflection of his voice.
Back then he had only felt anger and pain but now thinking of it, Ye Ming was probably very irritated back then.
Because he didn"t believe him and didn"t want to understand him and continued to question him, so he said those words out of impatience and frustration… and he also didn"t think from his perspective and just left. He didn"t even give him a chance to explain after.
Ming Chong closed his eyes. He suddenly felt his eyes were hot. My love… originally I didn"t need to lose you.
He really wanted to go forward and get closer to this person but he couldn"t move his feet or raise his hand.
They were clearly so close to each other, but the distance felt like the ends of the world.
Ye Ming laughed at himself. He raised his eyebrow and looked at Ming Chong. "If you believe me now then let me go. Don"t worry, I won"t make you take responsibility for anything."
After all, you are someone that I once loved.
Ming Chong"s hand was held tightly into a fist and his body trembled. Deep anguish flashed through his eyes. After a full minute pa.s.sed, he slowly raised his head and said, "I can"t let you go."
This time Ye Ming was really caught by surprise. Because from Ming Chong"s previous behaviour he thought he had finally understood. "Don"t you believe w.a.n.g Heng"s words? Why do you still want to take revenge against me?"
Ming Chong"s face was bloodless. "It"s not that…."
Ye Ming asked, "Then why?"
Ming Chong laughed bitterly. Why indeed?
Because I can"t lose you. If you left, then I"m afraid you won"t ever look at me again. This time… I don"t have any more chances to win you back, this time you really don"t love me anymore.
But I still can"t lose you.
Ming Chong looked at him. In his eyes tender affection was mixed with despair and regret. He said lowly, "Because I love you."
Ye Ming froze. But then he laughed. "What tricks are you up to now? Do you think that a simple "I love you" can make up for all the hurt you"ve caused?"
His eyes were cold. "Ming Chong, this should be enough right? Don"t keep clinging onto things, if you do then I"ll really look down on you."
Ming Chong closed his eyes. Sorry ah… I know that what I did was unforgivable. That you should think this way is understandable.
After a while Ming Chong opened his eyes. He suddenly seemed to make up his mind and slowly walked in front of Ye Ming. He reached out and embraced this person and his voice was hoa.r.s.e. "I know you can"t forgive me, but I really won"t suspect or hurt you again. Other than letting you go… anything else I"ll listen to you, okay?"
"Don"t leave me."
His voice carried with it a begging tone. At this time he had thrown aside his laughable pride and self-respect. As long as he could keep this person, he could sacrifice anything.
Ye Ming was extremely disappointed. He unhesitatingly threw off Ming Chong and said coldly. "I"m tired."
After speaking he walked upstairs.
This evening Ming Chong didn"t come to find him. He only stood outside the door and looked at him, separated by the door, as though he could still see the person he loved the most.
He stood there for the entire night.
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