The Scum Shou's Survival Guide

Chapter is translated by Syeki. Unedited.

Chapter is translated by Syeki. Unedited.

The chapter is split into 4 parts as per Syeki"s request as it is very long.

Chapter 39B

Worn down by Ye Ming"s perseverance and shameless flattery, 888 reluctantly agreed to play a game with him. But Ye Ming was a sc.u.m who only knew how to talk big and drag others down by playing dead, so that 888 came very close to flipping him off entirely.

After pa.s.sing some time in this way, 888 finally reported some movement from Concubine Liang. It heaved a great sigh of relief, it was finally able to get rid of this c.u.mbersome baggage!

It has been suffering ridicule from the other systems because of this sorry excuse for a host!

Of course, much later in the future…. when 888 suddenly discovered that Ye Ming had first cla.s.s gaming skills, it angrily refused to turn on the pain shield for him. But that"s a story for another day.

Concubine Liang slaved to finish copying Lessons for Women and had to sit through being lectured by the two elderly maids, before finally being permitted to leave the palace. She didn"t dare seek Ye Ming out to cause trouble again, but her restless heart couldn"t endure having being forced to swallow such a bitter pill. After much deliberation, she set off for the Empress Dowager"s palace and told a highly embellished story of the Emperor"s favourite male pet.

If the Empress Dowager is the one to strike, that male pet would definitely not escape!

The Empress Dowager had never been particularly concerned about this son of hers, and had never shown him much care. But hearing of the excessive favouritism for the male pet with no regard for the protocols of rank, to the point of neglecting the other concubines, agitated her.

This is a serious matter concerning the succession of their lineage! If this was permitted to continue, who knows what troubles it will stir. She finally issued a summons for Ye Ming.

Ye Ming observed all this with a sly smile.

If no one took any action, Li ZeChen would continue to avoid seeing him, how could he (YM) allow this? There"s no other way for him to lure Li ZeChen out!

And so, when the elderly maids from the Empress Dowager"s palace came to summon him, he did not put up any resistance.

The Empress Dowager was a middle aged woman, her looks were not extraordinary, and she was not of n.o.ble birth. If it wasn"t for her having given birth to a son, she would have been buried with the previous Emperor"s death. She wasn"t particularly intelligent either, and so was easily swayed by Concubine Liang"s goading.

Note: 陪葬 (Péizàng) – The ancient China practise of burying gifts, food, servants, wives, etc with the dead ruler, as property to accompany the ruler in death. Servants (and sometimes wives) were put to death before being entombed together.

She eyed Ye Ming with a frown filled with scorn: "So, you"re the Emperor"s new male pet?"

Ye Ming respected her as Li ZeChen"s mother, and as the Empress Dowager, naturally this would be of concern to her. But he could not help feeling humiliated by the blunt question.

Ye Ming"s silence convinced her further of the truth of Concubine Liang"s words, this male pet must be heavily favored by the Emperor to display such unseemly arrogance. Her voice rose harshly: "Ai-jia is asking you a question!"

Note: 哀家 (Āi jiā) – The first person p.r.o.noun used for empresses whose emperor has pa.s.sed away. In short, they refer to themselves as "this widow/this mourner".

Even though Ye Ming has accepted the role of a male pet, he could only do so in Li ZeChen"s presence. He would never be willing to openly acknowledge this ident.i.ty in public. Better to die in this courtyard, then suffer a lingering death under the public"s scornful gaze.

Note: 凌迟 (Língchí) – the slow process, the lingering death, or slow slicing, and also known as death by a thousand cuts, was a form of torture and execution used in China from roughly 900 CE until it was banned in 1905.

He lifted his head reluctantly and said, “No.”

It was beyond the Empress Dowager"s expectations for Ye Ming to deny this! Shockingly, this person had obviously climbed into the dragon"s bed, but had the audacity to refuse the t.i.tle of a male pet, he must have been spoiled rotten by the Emperor! Sudden fury rose in her: "As a male pet, you should know your own duties, don"t you know how important a son is to His Majesty? It"s fine if you relieve the Emperor"s boredom every now and then, how dare you try to monopolise His Majesty, do you understand your wrongs?"

Note: 龙床 (Lóng chuáng) - dragon bed, aka the emperor"s bed. During the days of Imperial China, the Emperor of China usually used the dragon as a symbol of his imperial strength and power.

Ye Ming gazed at the furious Empress Dowager and calmly replied: "I did no wrong."

Note: Ye Ming used the normal "I" as in "Wǒ" instead of "Chén" aka "this minister" that he usually uses around Li ZeChen.

He had never wanted to stay here, much less attempted to monopolise the Emperor, but these people will never believe him.

The Empress Dowager was enraged beyond belief by his words, this insignificant male pet is really crazy! Hopping mad, she finally gave a furious order: "Drag him out, give him 30 beatings with the stave, let this arrogant fool learn the rules of the palace!"

Note: 大板 (Dà bǎn) – The victim is usually held/tied face down to a long wooden stool, and the behind will be beaten by large wooden staves. Injuries can be crippling and cause death if the punishment is prolonged. If you want to know more, google 打板子.

As Ye Ming was dragged out, the corners of his mouth curled up in a self deprecating smile.

His words were carefully chosen. There were no lies, but the Empress Dowager would definitely think that he was deliberately provoking her, and would not permit his presence to continue confusing the Emperor.

Since he couldn"t commit suicide, if the Empress Dowager were to kill him, all the better. He shouldn"t be blamed for this, right?

How could the Empress Dowager possibly tolerate his existence, it was only a matter of time.

Ye Ming was pressed down onto a stool, he closed his eyes and waited for the board to strike his body…. suddenly, screams sounded from his side! He blinked and looked up to see a sword stabbed through the shoulder of the execution eunuch who had been standing next to him. The eunuch fell, and the board hit the ground with a m.u.f.fled clatter.

Everyone was stunned silly by the scene, their heads turned to look in the door"s direction, and suddenly plastered themselves to the ground!

Expression dark and cold as a knife, Li ZeChen strode in!

During the period of his absence, he could not bring himself to face Ye Ming, and hence did not pay him (YM) a visit, but he still paid attention to the news delivered to him of Ye Ming"s wellbeing. Upon receiving the news that Ye Ming had been summoned by the Empress Dowager, he was ready to come s.n.a.t.c.h him away to spare him (YM) further embarra.s.sment.

But he understood his mother well, she would not dare strike against one of his own, and hence he had not hurried over. Who would have thought he would arrive to a scene of Ye Ming being held down in the yard in preparation for a punishment. Stricken with fear of not being in time to prevent it, he struck the guard with his sword and flung him away!

Li ZeChen hurried over to Ye Ming and lifted him up to lean into his arms. He asked anxiously: "Are you hurt?"

Ye Ming didn"t think that Li ZeChen would show up so suddenly. Being held in Li ZeChen"s arms in public view, he was too ashamed for words.

Li ZeChen"s emotions had been in chaos from anxiety. After calming down a bit, he realised that Ye Ming was not injured, and was relieved. He swept a cool gaze over the people around them. Seeing this, everyone flattened themselves to the ground and shivered. Even the eunuch who had been stabbed didn"t make so much as a whimper!

The Empress Dowager had not expected this, her expression fell when she came out: "Your Majesty, what is the meaning of this?"

Li ZeChen was livid with rage, but in actual fact, apart from when facing Ye Ming, he had always been able to conceal his emotions, and had never revealed his weaknesses to others. Towards his mother in public, he maintained a respectful front, and said slowly: "Your son has heard that mother brought one of my people here, so I came over to have a look. How has he offended you?"

Note:

儿臣 (Er chén) – first person p.r.o.noun employed by a male sovereign when speaking to an empress mother, queen mother, empress dowager, queen dowager. Er as in child/son, chén is the same as the address that Ye Ming uses to refer to himself as "this minister/this official".

您 (Nín) - LZC addresses the dowager with a polite "you".

The Empress Dowager looked at the blood spattered on the ground, and thought that, for the sake of this person, Li ZeChen acted in violence in her palace. It wasn"t that she couldn"t bear the sight of blood, but it was clear that this person was his raw nerve that she absolutely could not touch. How could a mere male pet explain this? Regret rose in her like bile.

But at the same time, her worries grew. After Li ZeChen ascended to the throne, he has never visited the harem, he doesn"t even have a single child, how can his addiction to this male pet bode well? She swallowed her pride and said bitterly: "Ai-jia has nothing to say about Your Majesty"s favour for him, but what about the other concubines? You have to visit them sometimes, it is the responsibility of the Emperor to ensure an heir for the continuation of the lineage."

The words stirred Li ZeChen"s impatience, but he replied faintly: "Understood, if there"s nothing else, your son will take his leave."

The Empress Dowager glared at him furiously, but did not dare detain him. She could only watch as Li ZeChen took Ye Ming away, before turning around with a sinking expression: "Summon Concubine Liang over!"

It seems that she had been used as someone else"s borrowed knife today!

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