Chapter 37
Li ZeChen"s eyes were dark and violent thoughts rippled through his chest.
Since you would rather die than be zhen"s Empress, then why should zhen treat you so preciously? Why should zhen constantly suppress myself? Just because I"m scared of frightening you, humiliating you, hurting you?
Since you made this choice, then zhen will fulfill it!
Ye Ming was thrown onto the bed. He saw Li ZeChen"s dangerous eyes and knew that this time he had finally really angered him.
He didn"t care at all. Wasn"t this day inevitable? No matter how much Li ZeChen pretended to be nice and gentle in front of him, he was still a proud Emperor, he would never allow anyone to reject him!
His so-called "patiently waiting", was only because he knew Ye Ming had nowhere to escape to.
Li ZeChen held Ye Ming"s face in his hand and used force to clutch his chin and violently kissed his lips.
Ye Ming tightly closed his eyes. From the moment he had spoken the words of rejection, he had already made mental preparations for any time of consequences, however… he would rather be humiliated and tortured then accede to the Emperor"s ridiculous request!
Li ZeChen"s fingertips moved pa.s.sed Ye Ming"s ear, cheeks and lips… his voice carried an icy quality, "This is the choice you made yourself."
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The bedside and the floor was filled with messy clothes. The bedsheets had been half pulled aside, revealing the figures inside. The man"s black hair was spread on the bed, and on his white skin there was many red marks. It was obvious he had just experienced a bout of lovemaking.
He half closed his eyes, and his eyelashes were wet. His corners of his lips were torn.
Li ZeChen sat by the bedside, wearing a robe casually. His face was very heavy.
Today had a completely possessed this person. This person that he had loved from the bottom of his heart for over ten years. He originally didn"t want to treat him this way, but although he tried all kinds of methods, he only received a rejection as an answer. At that time he completely lost his sense of reason.
However, he had finally obtained this person. However he wasn"t happy as he originally thought he would be. Probably it was because he wished the feelings could be mutual.
And that it hadn"t been forced…
[Ding! Li ZeChen"s blackening -10, the current blackening value is 80.]
Li ZeChen lowered his eyes and looked at Ye Ming. He wanted to reach out and embrace him however in the end he didn"t stretch out his hand. He only said coldly, "Since you are not willing to be zhen"s Empress, then just be zhen"s male pet ba."
Then you will know, what an incorrect decision you have made.
Zhen will wait for the day you regret!
Ye Ming heard his words and his eyelashes trembled slightly. He slightly opened his eyes and then struggled to get out of bed and kneel on the ground. He said, "Thank you, your Majesty. This minister obeys."
Rather than being laughed at by the entire world, it would be preferable to be a nameless and unknown male pet.
Li ZeChen stared fixedly at Ye Ming and saw his unhesitating words of thanks and even the slight expression of relief in his eyes…. He only felt that his chest was stuffy and he was pained and suffocated.
I wanted you to be my Empress, but you used all your effort to resist and would rather die than obey… now I want you to be a male pet, and you agreed so easily!
Do you understand what you"re agreeing to?!
Li ZeChen tossed his sleeves aside and stood up. He was scared that if he remained here, he would be unable to control himself and do something he will regret.
He was someone that had the habit of suppressing their emotions. Otherwise back then in the Palace he wouldn"t have been able to endure for so many years and let Li ZeYuan become careless towards him, and allow him to plot and plan his way to this position. But when facing Ye Ming, he was always on the precipice of losing control.
Ye Ming saw Li ZeChen"s back moving away and very tiredly fell on the bed.
[Ye Ming: Ah… my back is sore and my legs are soft… the Emperor is really the Emperor, so powerful.]
[888: …..]
[888: Tell me the truth. Are you doing this for the mission or for your s.e.x life?]
[Ye Ming: Of course it"s for the mission! How can you misunderstand me like this?]
[888: He he.]
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The next day the sun hadn"t even risen when the eunuch came to wake Ye Ming.
This was the first time in a long time that Ye Ming hadn"t woken up naturally. He was a little bit angry at being woken up, however for the sake of his acting he endured it.
The eunuch was as respectful as always, however the tone of his voice had become more professional. He said, "Young master you are to move to the Xuan He Courtyard, please come with this servant."
People came to immediately pull Ye Ming up from the bed and help him dress before sending him out the door.
Ye Ming didn"t resist. He obediently followed the people and left this place.
Compared to the Feng Yang Palace that Li ZeChen had personally constructed for him, the Xuan He Courtyard was much more lacking. It only had a few rooms, and a not very big yard. Although it had everything necessary and wasn"t old or broken down however when compared to the Feng Yang Palace, this place completely didn"t have any features.
Ye Ming entered his new quarters and his face was very calm. No matter where he was it wouldn"t change his mind.
No matter if it was a regal palace made of gold, or an old and rundown shanty house, to him it made no difference.
[Ye Ming: I feel like I"ve moved from the Presidential Suite of the Sheraton to a 7 Days Inn /(ToT)/~~]
{T/N: Not sure if they have 7 Days Inn in other countries, but in China it"s a low budget hotel chain, it"s like 2 or 3 star, like even cheaper than Holiday Inn.}
[888: 7 Days Inn is already good enough. You"re not even paying rent, so don"t have too many expectations. How many people are there in the world that don"t have anything to eat or wear and don"t even know how to survive. As a high-level white lotus, for the sake of the world, don"t think too much about material things.]
[Ye Ming: ….]
He might complain but after Ye Ming had a careful look he found that although nothing was as luxurious as the Feng Yang Palace, however it was definitely not shabby or old. The surrounds were quite simple and elegant, low-key but not without its own charm. Living here would be peaceful and quiet.
It was clear that Li ZeChen had spent a lot of effort over where to place him. He had to express his "coldness" towards him, but he didn"t actually want Ye Ming to suffer.
Although there was not as many people waiting upon him as before, only two eunuchs and two maids, however all of them were very dedicated and professional. They didn"t suddenly change their att.i.tude because of the "fall in status" but remained just as before, respectful with their eyes downcast, and treated him very well.
Although Ye Ming could see this very clearly, but since he was acting as the "would rather die than be bent" Qi MingYan, of course he would not appreciate Li ZeChen"s efforts in this regard! Although he had moved from the Feng Yan Palace to this out of the way corner, everyone would think that he had angered the Emperor in some way. This was the normal pattern of "losing favor".
Ye Ming knew that Li ZeChen"s methods couldn"t be just this simple. Although he wouldn"t really want to hurt him but since he had trampled over his heart so utterly, he would definitely would want to make him feel utter regret over his choices. He guessed that Li ZeChen had other methods up his sleeve to "humiliate" him, in order to make him understand his situation and change his mind.
Ye Ming started living there. At night he only received a few simple vegetable dishes. Since he was sick of eating exotic seafood dishes, it didn"t feel bad to change the flavor.
At night he had no intention of waiting of Li ZeChen. He read a little while then prepared to go to bed. At this time he heard the sound of the servants outside greeting the Emperor. He hurried to stand up. In the end Li ZeChen still came.
Ye Ming showed a surprised expression as though he thought that since Li ZeChen had a.s.signed him here that he wouldn"t be coming by. He knelt respectfully on the ground and said, "This minister greets the Emperor."
Li ZeChen glanced at Ye Ming. Today every word and every expression that Ye Ming had said or made had been reported back to him.
This person really didn"t care about money and wealth. Even if he was sent here, his expression didn"t change at all. This kind of loftiness and not caring about power and money personality… what could he do with him?
It wasn"t as though he didn"t have more cruel methods. In order to s.n.a.t.c.h a mere scholar into his hands… but how could he bear to use such methods on Ye Ming?
Li ZeChen"s hands were behind his back and his gaze was heavy. There wasn"t any sign of the previous warmth and tenderness. Right now his eyes were bottomless and the expression could not be read. He walked over to in front of Ye Ming and didn"t hurry to tell him to rise. Instead he only said faintly, "Since you are a male pet, then you should have the appearance of one."
Ye Ming thought that he had already endured the humiliation from the previous night. How could there be anything worse? So he respectfully said, "This minister understands."
Li ZeChen saw Ye Ming"s unmoved expression and his heart felt very stuffy. He said coldly, "Bring the things inside."
Obeying Li ZeChen"s words, eunuchs immediately appeared from behind him. They brought in a row of chests and placed it neatly inside the room. The eunuchs opened the chest and then respectfully backed out of the room.
The corner of Li ZeChen"s moth raised up and his voice had a mocking tone, "Then beloved minister, do you know how a male pet should behave?"
Ye Ming stilled. He was born out of a scholarly and academic household. He had always held himself to a high standard and hadn"t even been to a brothel before. How was he supposed to know how a male pet was supposed to behave? This ident.i.ty alone was enough to humiliate him. He supposed it was being a man who as not really a man, whose purpose was to fulfill other men"s desires… wasn"t it just what they had already done yesterday?
Li ZeChen saw Ye Ming"s expression and immediately knew he completely had no understanding of this. His heart softened. This person probably didn"t know anything even about the affairs between men and women, Li ZeChen was the first person who had ever been intimate with him. All of these things, Ye Ming had only shared with him…
Thinking about this, Li ZeChen"s heart unexpectedly felt better.
But he still needed to frighten him a bit. Otherwise how would Ye Ming know how he was supposed to behave?
He tenderly looked at Ye Ming"s face and then laughed. "Get up ba."
Ye Ming got up from the floor and and as usual hung his head. He was waiting for Li ZeChen"s order.
Li ZeChen walked over to the chest and took something made of jade stone. He said to Ye Ming, "Beloved minister, do you know how this is used?"
Ye Ming shook his head.
Following that was a series of very humilating instructions.
Very patiently, Li ZeChen took out every item in the chest and introduced it to Ye Ming. His instructions were extremely detailed. Ye Ming"s expression become uglier and uglier, and in the end even his lips were white. His eyes were filled with anger and shock and his entire body was frozen. In his entire life he had never heard such shocking things. Just who on earth would invent these kind of degrading toys. It was completely ridiculous!
Li ZeChen raised Ye Ming"s chin and kissed his white lips. He laughed softly and said, "When beloved minister learns all of this and uses everything once, then he will be considered a proper male pet."
Ye Ming heard these words and extreme humiliation and fear made him unable to stay calm.
He had originally thought he wasn"t scared of anything. But he had never thought Li ZeChen would use these kind of degrading methods. He would prefer to be sliced by a thousand swords, then use these kind of things!
Ye Ming suddenly wanted to kneel down but Li ZeChen directly grabbed him and threw him down!
Ye Ming thought of the words he just heard and was disobedient for the first time. He began to struggle. He opened his eyes wide and looked at Li ZeChen. His voice trembled. "Your Majesty, please just kill this minister ba."
When Li ZeChen heard these words, his good mood that he had just recovered immediately dissipated. He grasped Ye Ming"s chin and said slowly, "Zhen likes you so much, how can zhen kill you? Don"t ever say these words again."
Ye Ming"s eyes were anguished. This kind of "like", he would prefer not to have it!
Li ZeChen touched his face. His voice was both tender and cruel. "Beloved minister, you need to think about how to be a proper male pet. This way if zhen is in a good mood, then maybe zhen won"t let your relatives suffer."
It was like cold water had been splashed down on Ye Ming"s head. Just then he had been filled with anger and almost forgot what kind of frightening presence he was facing.
Right now even though to others he was a "dead person", however his relatives and his friends were still living…. all of these people"s fates were held in Li ZeChen"s hands.
Li ZeChen saw his appearance and found his anger disappearing. He sighed softly. After some time he steeled his heart, grasped the jade stone and placed it inside.
{T/N: So I"m pretty sure that"s what it is. Like stone or some kind of a.n.a.l s.e.x toy made of jade. Probably a d.i.l.d.o. Seen it in other danmei novels. But actually in order to avoid censor, author actually used two characters which phonetically sound the same as "jade stone" but don"t mean anything together.}
Ye Ming"s nails dug into his palms and closed his eyes. His heart felt like ash.
Li ZeChen didn"t touch him otherwise. He just reached out and gathered Ye Ming into his arms and said, "Sleep."
Yesterday he had already been very careful however Ye Ming was still injured somewhat. His body wasn"t very suitable for accommodating lovemaking with a man so originally Li ZeChen didn"t want to disturb him today. Just then it was also to help him apply medicine and also try to condition his body at the same time. After all he didn"t want to hurt Ye Ming every time.
However unfortunately Ye Ming couldn"t understand this. He only thought Li ZeChen was doing this to humiliate him. Thinking about the things inside the chest he felt both angry and fearful. And the thing inside his body made him feel extremely awkward.
This whole night Ye Ming didn"t sleep. The next day there were shadows underneath his eyes.
Li ZeChen frowned. He didn"t think Ye Ming would be this stubborn. But thinking about his end goal, he only ordered, "Without zhen"s permission, you can"t take it out."
He got up, got dressed in the dragon robe and went to morning court.
Although Ye Ming had moved to the Xuan He Courtyard, however Li ZeChen still came here every night to sleep. Because of the thing inside his body, Ye Ming felt extremely humilated and didn"t leave the room one step.
Thus after a few days, Li ZeChen finally claimed him again. This time it was much easier than before and didn"t injure him.
Afterwards Li ZeChen looked at the humiliated to death Ye Ming and finally his heart softened and said, "If you are obedient then in the future you don"t need to use those things, okay?"
Ye Ming bit his lip and didn"t speak. Both his eyes were red.
Li ZeChen sighed.
To you, is being with me such a painful thing? Shouldn"t it be the happiest thing a mortal can experience? Can"t you feel it at all? No…. it should be that you do feel it, it"s only human nature, however your logic will not allow you to accept such joy.
It"s not that I don"t understand your thinking, I only want you to accept me. It"s been so many years…. Don"t you have even the slightest bit of emotions towards me? Even if it"s not to the level of "like", it should at least be care and warm feelings ba?
Why can"t you be like before and accept and like me? All of this, isn"t the way you think.
Originally we should have been loving towards each other, why did it become like this?
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When Ye Ming"s body improved, and was more used to him, LI ZeChen made love with him every night. This was something he had been dreaming about for countless days, finally he could experience it and so it wasn"t a surprise that he couldn"t control himself and wanted it endlessly.
Li ZeChen could now understand the ancient Emperors who didn"t want to go to morning court"s thinking. For this person, even if he had suffer through rebellion and warfare, it would be worth it.
Ye Ming was done every day until he couldn"t get out of the bed. After some time, Li ZeChen"s blackening was also reduced by 10 points and so he felt very satisfied.
[Ye Ming: Although these days are quite happy, according to this person"s setting, I should be showing some kind of reaction by now.]
[888: It seems like you"re very concerned about this person"s setting?]
[Ye Ming: Of course! This setting is the basis of my method for reducing blackening! In the end, the person he loves has this setting. It doesn"t matter if I die, however if the mission fails that wouldn"t be good.]
[888: This setting, isn"t it also you? Every word and movement is made by you, what"s the difference?]
[Ye Ming: No I think it"s better to draw a clear line between us ^_^] This way he could tell himself that the person that all of these men loved was not the real him. It was all just a game. So he didn"t need to give out his real heart, what would be the point of that?
[Ye Ming: Also if I don"t act as a demon, how can I remove the blackening~~]
[888: ….]
Today Li ZeChen came as soon as court finished. He saw the palace maids kneeling outside looking terrified. LI ZeChen"s eyes narrowed and he opened the door and walked inside.
Ye Ming lay on the bed. His face was white and his chin was pointy. Only his black eyes were still bright. In front of him his meal hadn"t been touched at all.
Li ZeChen immediately understood what was going on. He said, "How come you"re not eating?"
Ye Ming said respectfully, "I don"t have any appet.i.te."
Li ZeChen fingers moved. Although Ye Ming was just as respectful as before and didn"t show anything on the surface, but how he could be not see into his heart? Is it so painful to be my side, is it so hard to bear?!
Li ZeChen"s heart was very cold. He was silent for a long time and then he went and held Ye Ming up and held him in his arms. Before of his action Ye Ming"s robe was pulled aside and exposed the fierce marks which hadn"t had time to disappear yet. Li ZeChen reached out, held the bowl and personally began to feed Ye Ming.
Ye Ming lowered his eyes and didn"t protest. If Li ZeChen fed him a mouthful then he would eat a mouthful, his movement was very slow and it took some effort just to eat half a bowl.
Li ZeChen wanted to continue to feed but Ye Ming suddenly made a noise and vomited .
He leaned against the bed and dry retched for a long time. After that he turned around and looked with terror at Li ZeChen. "Your Majesty please punish me. This minister didn"t do it deliberately."
Li ZeChen didn"t care about the vomit covering his sleeves. He ordered the palace maids to bring new food. He helped Ye Ming wipe his chin and began to feed him again.
Ye Ming continued to not protest however every time he ate a few mouthfuls he would vomit. Afterwards his eyes were filled with tears and his expression extremely pitiful.
Li ZeChen helplessly put down the bowl. With a cold face he called the imperial doctor over.
The imperial doctor arrived quickly and after looking for a long time, said the young master had a psychological illness {T/N: The literal translation is illness of the heart, but the meaning is psychological illness. Term sounds a bit modern but I didn"t use heart illness as it might be confused for cardiac disease.}
Li ZeChen"s face was like ice and a pained expression flashed through his eyes. After some time he returned to the room and said slowly, "Zhen won"t touch you so you must eat properly, do you understand?"
Ye Ming said obediently, "This minister understands."
Although he said this however Ye Ming continued to not be able to eat. He could only drink a little water. After three days, his entire person became very thin and frail.
Li ZeChen"s heart was very pained however he was helpless. Ye Ming probably was hoping for death, that"s why he couldn"t eat a single thing!
What psychological illness? It was just a lack of will to live!
This day Li ZeChen came again to personally feed Ye Ming. As usual Ye Ming couldn"t swallow it. Lying on the bed, it was though his entire body was made of ash.
Just thinking that this person could die like this, Li ZeChen"s heart felt extremely heavy.
Even when he had been fighting for the throne, when every moment could have been his last, he had never been so frightened.
He definitely couldn"t let Ye Ming die!
Li ZeChen stared at Ye Ming for a long time. Suddenly he slammed his hand and all the bowls and utensils on the table clattered to the ground, making a clanging sound. Water and food was splashed everywhere. His gaze was dark and he said coldly, "You want to die this much?"
Ye Ming said in a deathly tone, "This minister doesn"t dare."
Doesn"t dare? How do you not dare?!
Li ZeChen"s eyes were black and his heart was filled with anger and pain. Complex and heavy emotions swirled together! The corner of his lip raised and he suddenly said, "Fine. Since you can"t eat then you don"t need to eat."
Li ZeChen picked Ye Ming up, turned around and left.
In this period of time it was the first time LI ZeChen had taken Ye Ming out of this courtyard. It didn"t take long for them to return to the royal study room
Li ZeChen placed Ye Ming down wicker chair beside a desk screen. He lowered his waist and lightly touched Ye Ming"s pale and bloodless lips.
How do you dare to seek death? Is it because you think you have nothing to fear?
Ye Ming half closed his eyes. He was tired and sleepy and hungry. However this was probably a form of relief ba… from now on he wouldn"t have to be trapped in the inner palace any longer, and every day have to tolerate making love every night, now he wasn"t even a real man anymore….
He really didn"t want to go on any longer.
Just as Ye Ming was thinking this, outside he heard the eunuch say, "Your Majesty, Prime Minister Qi is here. He is just outside the door. Do you want to see him?"
When these words fell into Ye Ming"s ear, his pupils contracted and a fearful expression appeared on his face! It was as though someone on the verge of death suddenly got a burst of adrenaline!
He raised his head and looked at Li ZeChen. What did he want to do?
Li ZeChen lowered his head and kissed Ye Ming"s forehead. He looked into his eyes and on his lips appeared a smile that didn"t rise to his eyes.
Ye Ming suddenly realized something. He struggled to reach out his hand. His thin fingers clutched Li ZeChen"s clothes with a deathly grip. His eyes exposed a begging expression and his voice was very weak. "Don"t…."
I"m begging you, please don"t do this.
Li ZeChen grabbed Ye Ming"s fingers and forcibly pushed them away. He said in a clear voice.
"Call the Prime Minister in."
The author says:
Ye Ming: Little black room! Little black room!
Li ZeChen: …..