But I do not think he would have bolted from Sandgate until he had really got some more definite answer to the question, "_What_ better dreams?" until he had surprised or forced some clearer illumination from the pa.s.sive invalid, if Mrs. Bunting one morning had not very tactfully dropped a hint.
You know Mrs. Bunting, and you can imagine what she tactfully hinted.
Just at that time, what with her own girls and the Glendower girls, her imagination was positively inflamed for matrimony; she was a matrimonial fanatic; she would have married anybody to anything just for the fun of doing it, and the idea of pairing off poor Melville to this mysterious immortal with a scaly tail seems to have appeared to her the most natural thing in the world.
_Apropos_ of nothing whatever I fancy she remarked, "Your opportunity is now, Mr. Melville."
"My opportunity!" cried Melville, trying madly not to understand in the face of her pink resolution.
"You"ve a monopoly now," she cried. "But when we go back to London with her there will be ever so many people running after her."
I fancy Melville said something about carrying the thing too far. He doesn"t remember what he did say. I don"t think he even knew at the time.
However, he fled back to London in August, and was there so miserably at loose ends that he had not the will to get out of the place. On this pa.s.sage in the story he does not dwell, and such verisimilitude as may be, must be supplied by my imagination. I imagine him in his charmingly appointed flat,--a flat that is light without being trivial, and artistic with no want of dignity or sincerity,--finding a loss of interest in his books, a loss of beauty in the silver he (not too vehemently) collects. I imagine him wandering into that dainty little bed-room of his and around into the dressing-room, and there, rapt in a blank contemplation of the seven-and-twenty pairs of trousers (all creasing neatly in their proper stretchers) that are necessary to his conception of a wise and happy man. For every occasion he has learnt, in a natural easy progress to knowledge, the exquisitely appropriate pair of trousers, the permissible upper garment, the becoming gesture and word. He was a man who had mastered his world. And then, you know, the whisper:--
"_There are better dreams._"
"What dreams?" I imagine him asking, with a defensive note. Whatever transparence the world might have had, whatever suggestion of something beyond there, in the sea garden at Sandgate, I fancy that in Melville"s apartments in London it was indisputably opaque.
And "d.a.m.n it!" he cried, "if these dreams are for Chatteris, why should she tell me? Suppose I had the chance of them-- Whatever they are----"
He reflected, with a terrible sincerity in the nature of his will.
"No!" And then again, "No!
"And if one mustn"t have "em, why should one know about "em and be worried by them? If she comes to do mischief, why shouldn"t she do mischief without making me an accomplice?"
He walks up and down and stops at last and stares out of his window on the jaded summer traffic going Haymarket way.
He sees nothing of that traffic. He sees the little sea garden at Sandgate and that little group of people very small and bright and something--something hanging over them. "It isn"t fair on them--or me--or anybody!"
Then you know, quite suddenly, I imagine him swearing.
I imagine him at his luncheon, a meal he usually treats with a becoming gravity. I imagine the waiter marking the kindly self-indulgence of his clean-shaven face, and advancing with that air of intimate partic.i.p.ation the good waiter shows to such as he esteems. I figure the respectful pause, the respectful enquiry.
"Oh, anything!" cries Melville, and the waiter retires amazed.
V
To add to Melville"s distress, as petty discomforts do add to all genuine trouble, his club-house was undergoing an operation, and was full of builders and decorators; they had gouged out its windows and gagged its hall with scaffolding, and he and his like were guests of a stranger club that had several members who blew. They seemed never to do anything but blow and sigh and rustle papers and go to sleep about the place; they were like blight-spots on the handsome plant of this host-club, and it counted for little with Melville, in the state he was in, that all the fidgety breathers were persons of eminent position. But it was this temporary dislocation of his world that brought him unexpectedly into a _quasi_ confidential talk with Chatteris one afternoon, for Chatteris was one of the less eminent and amorphous members of this club that was sheltering Melville"s club.
[Ill.u.s.tration: They seemed never to do anything but blow and sigh and rustle papers.]
Melville had taken up _Punch_--he was in that mood when a man takes up anything--and was reading, he did not know exactly what. Presently he sighed, looked up, and discovered Chatteris entering the room.
He was surprised to see Chatteris, startled and just faintly alarmed, and Chatteris it was evident was surprised and disconcerted to see him.
Chatteris stood in as awkward an att.i.tude as he was capable of, staring unfavourably, and for a moment or so he gave no sign of recognition.
Then he nodded and came forward reluctantly. His every movement suggested the will without the wit to escape. "You here?" he said.
"What are you doing away from Hythe at this time?" asked Melville.
"I came here to write a letter," said Chatteris.
He looked about him rather helplessly. Then he sat down beside Melville and demanded a cigarette. Suddenly he plunged into intimacy.
"It is doubtful whether I shall contest Hythe," he remarked.
"Yes?"
"Yes."
He lit his cigarette.
"Would you?" he asked.
"Not a bit of it," said Melville. "But then it"s not my line."
"Is it mine?"
"Isn"t it a little late in the day to drop it?" said Melville. "You"ve been put up for it now. Every one"s at work. Miss Glendower----"
"I know," said Chatteris.
"Well?"
"I don"t seem to want to go on."
"My dear man!"
"It"s a bit of overwork perhaps. I"m off colour. Things have gone flat.
That"s why I"m up here."
He did a very absurd thing. He threw away a quarter-smoked cigarette and almost immediately demanded another.
"You"ve been a little immoderate with your statistics," said Melville.
Chatteris said something that struck Melville as having somehow been said before. "Election, progress, good of humanity, public spirit. None of these things interest me really," he said. "At least, not just now."
Melville waited.
"One gets brought up in an atmosphere in which it"s always being whispered that one should go for a career. You learn it at your mother"s knee. They never give you time to find out what you really want, they keep on shoving you at that. They form your character. They rule your mind. They rush you into it."
"They didn"t rush me," said Melville.
"They rushed me, anyhow. And here I am!"
"You don"t want a career?"
"Well-- Look what it is."