"I can"t drive a bit," she said petulantly. "I"m so silly! I nearly ran into the wall at the gate."
"Did you?"
"Yes. Gladys, we"re going over to Heston at two o"clock with Mr.
Kettering."
Gladys looked up.
"We! Who do you mean by "we"?"
"You and I, of course."
"Oh"--there was a momentary silence, then: "There"s a letter for you on the table," said Gladys.
Christine turned slowly, a little flush of colour rushing to her cheeks. She glanced apprehensively at the envelope lying face upwards, then she drew a quick breath, almost of relief it seemed.
She picked the letter up indifferently and broke open the flap. There was a moment of silence; Gladys glanced up.
"What"s the matter?" she asked.
Christine was staring out of the window, the letter lay on the floor at her feet.
"Jimmy"s ill," she said listlessly.
"Ill!" Gladys laid down her pen and swung round in the chair. "What"s the matter with him?" she asked rather sceptically.
"I don"t know. You can read the letter, it"s from Mr.
Sangster--Jimmy"s great friend."
She handed the letter over.
Gladys read it through and gave it back.
"Humph!" she said with a little inelegant sniff; she looked at her friend. "Are you going?" she asked bluntly.
Christine did not answer. She was thinking of Jimmy, deliberately trying to think of the man whom she had done her best during the last three weeks to forget. She tried to think of him as he had been that last dreadful night at the hotel, when he had threatened to strike her, when he had told her to clear out and leave him; but somehow she could only recall him as he had looked at Euston that morning when he said good-bye to her, with the hangdog, shamed look in his eyes, and the pathetic droop to his shoulders.
And now he was ill! It was kind of Sangster to have written, she told herself, even while she knew quite well that Jimmy had not asked him to; it would be the last thing in the world Jimmy would wish.
If he were ill, it was not because he wanted her. She drew her little figure up stiffly.
"I shan"t go unless I hear again that it is serious," she said stiltedly.
"Not--go!" Gladys"s voice sounded somehow blank, there was a curious expression in her eyes. After a moment she looked away. "Oh, well, you must please yourself, of course."
Christine turned to the door--she held Sangster"s letter in her hand.
"Besides," she said flippantly, "I"m going over to Heston this afternoon with Mr. Kettering."
She went up to her room and shut the door. She stood staring before her with blank eyes, her pretty face had fallen again into sadness, her mouth dropped pathetically.
She opened Sangster"s letter and read it through once more. Was Jimmy really ill, and was Sangster afraid to tell her, she wondered? Or was this merely Sangster"s way of trying to bring them together again?
But Jimmy did not want her; even if he were dying Jimmy would not want to see her again.
If he had cared he would never have consented to this separation; if he had cared--but, of course, he did not care!
She began to cry softly; big tears ran down her cheeks, and she brushed them angrily away.
She had tried to shut him out of her heart. She had tried to forget him. In a defensive, innocent way she had deliberately encouraged Kettering. She liked him, and he helped her to forget; it restored her self-esteem to read the admiration in his kind eyes, it helped to soothe the hurt she had suffered from Jimmy"s hands; and yet, in spite of it all, he was not Jimmy, and n.o.body could ever take Jimmy"s place.
She kept away from Gladys till lunch time, when at last she appeared, her eyes were red and swollen, and she held her head defiantly high.
Gladys considerately let her alone. Somehow, in spite of everything, she quite expected to hear that Christine was off to London by the afternoon train, but the meal pa.s.sed almost in silence, and when it was finished Christine said:
"We"d better get ready; Mr. Kettering will be there at two."
Gladys turned away.
"I"d rather not go, if you don"t mind," she said uncomfortably.
"Not--go!"
"No--I--I don"t care about motoring. I--I"ve got a headache too."
Christine stared at her, then she laughed defiantly.
"Oh, very well; please yourself."
She went upstairs to dress; she took great pains to make herself look pretty. When Kettering arrived she noticed that his eyes went past her gloomily as if looking for someone else.
"Gladys is not coming," she said.
His face brightened.
"Not coming! Ought I to be sorry, I wonder?"
She laughed.
"That"s rude."
"I"m sorry." He tucked the rug round her, and they started away down the drive. "You don"t want the wheel, I suppose?" he asked whimsically.
Christine shook her head.
"Have you--you been crying?" Kettering asked abruptly.
Christine flushed scarlet.
"Whatever makes you ask me that?"