The Secret Life of Marilyn Monroe.
by J. Randy Taraborrelli.
PREFACE.
Marilyn Monroe.
The mere name alone represents different images for different people. For some, it suggests the absolute standard of female sensuality. Beauty. Grace. Sophistication. For others, insecurity comes to mind. Misery. Tragedy. However, in order to appreciate the complex and fascinating life of this enigmatic star, one must attempt to put aside any preconceived notions about her-certainly no easy feat, considering her iconic status.
Perhaps the first step toward truly understanding Marilyn is to accept that all of the vivid images conjured by her name are true-from the good to the bad, the glorious to the tragic. Indeed, she was a woman who enjoyed and suffered a wide spectrum of experiences, many that are well known and quite a few-as you will read on these pages-that have remained private and undisclosed until now. Still, her devoted fans have always felt that they"ve known her well. Some who admire her without reservation can be moved to tears by the memory of a certain, maybe haunting, performance she gave on film. They fall into a group of devotees who would sacrifice almost anything to have their idol back among the living-only this time healthy and happy. To them, she is someone to be adored and placed high on a pedestal-preferably in a pose befitting her cinematic royalty. Others who are more circ.u.mspect view her as a spoiled Hollywood celebrity. They see her life as a cautionary tale of the dangers of excessive superstardom. To them, she is someone to be pitied as much as loved. Again, though all judgments and musings about her have an element of truth, there is a group I"d like to invite you to join with the reading of this biography-the select group of people who simply want one thing: the truth.
To say that much has been written about Marilyn Monroe is an understatement if ever there was one. Yet during the time I spent researching this book, I was surprised by just how muddled and conflicting the previous accounts of her life have been over the years. I also learned that there are some intriguing reasons why many of the stories about Marilyn have felt at arm"s length from her, as if her time on this earth had been viewed through a diffusion filter. For one thing, many fantastic legends about her have been accepted as fact. Therefore, separating truth from fiction is not an easy task-especially since a good deal of the fanciful tales about her were created by the lady herself! Then there"s the residue of old Hollywood"s public relations tactics. Some of those who were personally involved in Marilyn"s life were products of a vastly different era. Once upon a time, there was a hands-off policy when it came to the images of celebrities, and there is to this day, among surviving members of that community, a feeling of reverence-a respect for the way the studios wanted us to view movie stars... from a distance.
However, Marilyn"s presence, both onscreen and off, promised something quite different. She often appeared open and available, as if the answer to anything you wanted to know about her was just a question away. That, though, was an illusion. You see, Marilyn Monroe had a love-hate relationship with the truth, and at times with reality itself. It"s no great mystery why she so desperately tried to avoid the truth. Often it was agonizing, unbearable, and, she hoped, escapable. Why? Because, Marilyn-the picture of glamour and confidence to the outside world-was a woman far more troubled than most people knew. Though she would try to hide it from the world with her seamless portrayal of style and wit, those closest to her were privy to her deepest, darkest secret: She feared for her own sanity. Because her grandmother and mother were committed to insane asylums, Marilyn lived with the constant threat of impending madness. The often heartwrenching war she fought with her own mind has never, until now, been properly examined and presented. Thankfully for this biography, many of Marilyn"s contemporaries were convinced to come forward and discuss the specifics of her secret battle. These interviewees, many in the twilight of their lives, were vital to the completion of this book. In part, I believe their cooperation came with the realization that certain details of Marilyn"s life had not yet been accurately revealed, and that the truth of her struggles would die with them.
Much of what can be taken from Marilyn Monroe"s story is inspirational. After all, she is a woman who overcame seemingly insurmountable odds to become not only adored and respected but also, arguably, the biggest movie star in all the world. While a large part of her life was spent building and maintaining her career, in private Marilyn was pa.s.sionate in her quest for family family. She sought the permanency that the notion of a family promised. Sadly, it rarely delivered. Undaunted, she maintained close relationships with a mother who was constantly being inst.i.tutionalized and a half sister the world didn"t know existed. On these pages, you will read about those fascinating relationships for the first time, and numerous others that have been previously misunderstood. Marilyn also went to great lengths to identify and then meet her father. Indeed, her quest for genuine and meaningful bonding would continue throughout her life.
Perhaps the real story of this woman revolves around something she-at her best-possessed in great abundance: hope. She believed throughout her entire time on this earth that anything was possible, and she often proved just that. Those who find it difficult to read the unsettling details of her life outlined in this book should remember that, even toward the very end, Marilyn had moments when she believed ultimate happiness to be just within her grasp. In fact, if there is one thing that set her apart from most people, it was her ability to maintain an urgency to the present moment. She believed that her "now" was more important than her past and future. Sadly, while she attempted to remain in the present, her past haunted her almost as much as her future frightened her.
Marilyn Monroe was so much more than just a famous movie star. She was a vulnerable soul, a generous spirit, and a brave soldier in a devastating battle with her own mind. Attempting to explain her difficult journey is the challenge I set for myself with this book. At the heart of the story, I discovered a very different kind of Marilyn, a woman far more complex and serious-and maybe even tragic-than the one I thought I knew.
PROLOGUE.
The cavernous arena is electric, its walls vibrating with applause one moment, laughter the next. Yet at the end of one of its long hallways and sitting behind a closed door is a woman having an experience all her own. Just minutes earlier, she had breezed through a crowd of onlookers and backstage technicians with a confident smile and a glamorous way. At this moment, however, while waiting for a drink she"d requested of a stagehand, she seems to shiver with apprehension. "They"re making fun of me," she tells the young man as he offers her a gla.s.s of New York City tap water. "Listen." But he can"t follow her direction, for he is too taken aback by how her eyes are locked on his... how she she is talking to is talking to him him... and how she is... Marilyn Monroe Marilyn Monroe. Indeed, even though he shook hands with the president of the United States less than an hour ago, this this is the moment he will always treasure. is the moment he will always treasure.
Moments earlier, the woman was an emotional wreck, confused and panicked when she popped her head out of her dressing room to ask him for the favor of a drink. But now she is looking to him for something altogether different. Perspective. Rea.s.surance. Maybe even wisdom. After it"s clear that he is nearly immobilized by her presence, she drops her look of concern and smiles knowingly. After all, he"s just another one, and she knows it-another one of the millions of men who love her. One thing he doesn"t doesn"t know, however, is something that might surprise him: She loves him back. know, however, is something that might surprise him: She loves him back.
By May 19, 1962, Marilyn Monroe had whittled down her circle of close friends to a precious few-or perhaps the circ.u.mstances of her life had done it for her. Along the way, there had been many who tried to talk her through her bouts of anxiety or paranoia. However, their efforts were almost always in vain. Marilyn was convinced that she knew better. In a heartbreaking catch-22, those dearest to her would throw up their hands and surrender to her need to be right-even if what she was correct about was her own misery. Without anyone left in her world able to lift her from her darkest periods, she would spend the majority of her time alone... thinking-which was, of course, exactly what kept her in such despair. Therefore, it would often be in small moments like this one-time spent with a starstruck stranger rendered speechless in her presence-that she would be reminded of who she was, and of what was expected of her.
She pushes away from the wall she"s been leaning against and approaches the young man. Once standing before him, she bends forward, holds his ears between her palms, and kisses the top of his head. "Thank you," she says in a soft voice. "Now I need to get ready."
As he slips out of the room, he notices her moving to a large mirror, sighing loudly. She begins laughing as he pulls the k.n.o.b-and then, when the door clicks shut: silence, again. This strange behavior leaves him thinking what everyone else backstage that night has been: What is going on in there? Not just in that dressing room, but inside that beautiful head of hers.
"Marilyn had practiced so hard for that performance," explained her friend Susan Strasberg, "far too much if you ask me. It was too important to her. All she had to do was sing "Happy Birthday." Most performers could have done that with their eyes closed."
Marilyn, of course, was not "most performers." In fact, she wasn"t even most "people." Rather, she was a woman waging a specific battle fought by many in the world on a daily basis: mental illness. Her mood swings and unpredictable behavior were usually viewed by her public as mere eccentricities incidental to who Marilyn Monroe was as a woman. Yet the difficult emotional tug-of-war she endured for much of her life, ignored by almost everyone, may have been her most defining characteristic.
On this night, however, why would Marilyn, globally recognized as a major celebrity, think that she was being made fun of? While she had often wrongly believed in the past that the worst was being thought and said about her, on this evening she happened to be right. They were were making fun of her. making fun of her.
By this time in her history, gallons of newspaper ink had been used to describe to the world just who Marilyn Monroe was-that was nothing new. However, in the weeks leading up to this performance at Madison Square Garden in New York City, much of that ink was used to explain that she was, above all, irresponsible. She had been chronically late or completely absent for the making of her most recent film-a production from which she would ultimately be fired. The world knew about it and didn"t care. After all, she was Marilyn Monroe. In the public"s collective reasoning, she had carte blanche. Those who had been fans for at least the last decade viewed her mounting unpredictability as a necessary evil-just one of the things that made Marilyn... Marilyn. However, the truth was that her increasingly troubling behavior was much more than just a star"s idiosyncrasy, to be joked about over c.o.c.ktails. It was a sign that something was terribly wrong with her.
Onstage that night, many renowned performers were a.s.sembled to celebrate the birthday of President John F. Kennedy. Frank Sinatra was present, as were Diahann Carroll, Jack Benny, Henry Fonda, Leontyne Price, and many other luminaries. Each of them took to the stage to perform after being introduced in a dignified manner. Marilyn, however, received a very different introduction.
"Mr. President, Marilyn Monroe," the distinguished British actor Peter Lawford intoned numerous times throughout the evening. However, the "gag" of these many introductions was that when her arrival was announced, the spotlight would swing to the side of the stage and then-nothing. She wouldn"t appear. Everyone would laugh, of course. After all, it had become a not-so-inside joke that Marilyn Monroe was a woman upon whom n.o.body could depend. Funny? Not particularly, especially if one took the time to examine just why why she had become so unreliable. she had become so unreliable.
She had been in on the joke that night, of course, and had even seemed tickled that her eventual appearance would be teased throughout the four-hour-long event. Indeed, as had often been the case in Marilyn"s life, she knew that the public"s expectations of her revolved around what they thought she lacked, not what she possessed. "Most people didn"t think of talent when they thought of Marilyn," Dean Martin once observed. "They saw this creature who happened to be blessed with the beauty of a G.o.ddess and the brain of a peac.o.c.k." However, Marilyn was no dumb blonde; she was much more intelligent than most people realized. For years she had used her intellectual abilities to conceal her most private struggles.
Once again, every ounce of willpower would be brought to bear this evening in order that the mere mortal could transform herself into the G.o.ddess the world had come to know and love. When Marilyn finally took the stage, the theater erupted into thunderous applause. She was charismatic, empowered, and, of course, spectacularly beautiful. Peter Lawford watched her wriggle toward him, her steps restricted to tiny strides due to her sheer gown"s tightly tailored hem. After delivering a final punch line to the running joke of the evening-"Mr. President, the late late... Marilyn Monroe"-he reached toward the star"s ample bosom and took from her an ermine fur. There she stood, looking almost naked, wrapped only in her ethereal beauty, shimmering in sequins, beads, and sparkling light.
Alone now, she waited for the crowd"s reaction to wane before she could start to sing. It didn"t for quite some time. The applause became less apparent, though, as a low-pitched throng of gasps and cheers came forth, mostly from the men in attendance. In fact, there was a full thirty seconds between the moment her outfit was revealed and the time she was able to begin singing. During that time, the audience"s reaction changed from hoots and hollers to audible mumbles and, finally, to smatterings of laughter. She held her hands at her brow in order to shield her eyes from the spotlight, maybe hoping to see more clearly the man of honor-a man she had hoped might one day be more to her than just her commander in chief. Then, after a particularly loud guffaw from a man in one of the first few rows, Marilyn"s shoulders dropped and she sighed audibly. Eventually, deciding not to wait for silence, she started to sing while the ma.s.ses continued expressing their reaction.
"Happy birthday... to you," she cooed, her voice a s.e.xy-and maybe just a tad off-key-whisper. "Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday... Mr. Pre-si-dent Pre-si-dent. Happy birthday to you." The room continued its rowdy response as she did her best to give her public what it wanted-an unmistakable and very specific memory of Marilyn Monroe. Finishing the first chorus, she motioned for the audience to join in-"Everybody! Happy birthday..." The crowd responded to her invitation by taking up the song and trying to follow her somewhat erratic, arm-waving conducting.
After she finished her performance, a man approached Marilyn from behind. While the cameras cut to a birthday cake being wheeled in, she was escorted from the stage and away from a moment in which she had wanted to partic.i.p.ate: President John F. Kennedy climbing the stairs to the stage to say a few words of appreciation. Marilyn had wanted to simply give him a quick peck and then shuffle back offstage. Yet there were many who felt that she was too unpredictable that night, too erratic. "Yes, there was some anxiety surrounding her appearance," recalled Diahann Carroll. "I can"t say that I knew why, or what was going on. But I do remember a certain level of... tension. Some people were quite... edgy."
Once backstage, Marilyn heard the president express his grat.i.tude for her performance. "Now I can retire from politics," he said, "after having "Happy Birthday" sung to me in such a sweet and wholesome way." A couple of months prior, she had told JFK how her ex-husband, Joe DiMaggio, wanted her to retire from show business to be his wife. Now, hearing his words, a look of astonishment crossed her face. Later, she would ask his sister, Pat Kennedy Lawford, if he had made the statement for her benefit. The reasonable response to her question was most certainly no. However, at that point, Marilyn"s supply of reason had been dwindling for quite some time. She had begun living her life in clearly defined segments of clarity and confusion. For years Marilyn Monroe had been able to use her craft to perpetuate an illusion. Indeed, the star that people saw toward the end of her life was but a sh.e.l.l game-a well-crafted presentation of someone who had disappeared years ago... that is, if she ever really existed.
PART ONE.
The Beginning
Norma Jeane"s Foster Mother, Ida.
How to describe Ida Bolender? With dark brown eyes behind large, round spectacles on an elongated and severe face, she looked like the cla.s.sic schoolmarm. She could have been attractive, had she been interested. However, she didn"t have time to worry about superficialities. Her hairstyle spoke volumes. Cut bluntly just below her ears and unevenly around her head, her hair looked as if she"d taken scissors and chopped away without any forethought. The total effect was a haphazard, inky black coif around her head. Her clothing also said much about her. She wore the same type of dress every day-a short-sleeved frock that hung loosely on her frame like a gunnysack. She called this garment, functional and practical, her "house dress." Though still a young woman of just thirty-seven, she was such a model of efficiency and diligence she seemed much older-maybe in her fifties. She was always busy, whether with a full schedule of housework or with the day"s errands of devotion to the Hawthorne Community Church in Hawthorne, California, of which she was a parishioner. * *
To some, Ida seemed a somewhat cold and unfeeling woman who, despite being a foster mother, didn"t really take to children. Sometimes she appeared distant and remote, which is why there was some question as to whether she sincerely had the desire to raise children or simply had an interest in the money she received to take care of them-roughly twenty-five dollars a week per child from either the child"s family or the State of California. It wasn"t a fair characterization. In fact, Ida had opened her home to underprivileged children during the challenging 1920s. This was a time when scores of young people were being put up for adoption, due in part to a floundering economy, and also to the needs of a growing number of young women who felt a calling to enter the workforce. Though she certainly had no interest in business, Ida did want a better life, one her husband"s meager salary as a mailman could not provide. The extra income she received from foster parenting may not have been plentiful, but it was enough for her to feel some worth and also a certain degree of independence. Moreover, as her foster daughter Nancy Jeffrey explains, "One of the reasons Ida may have appeared disconnected was because she was hearing impaired and without the benefit of a hearing aid. She often had to read lips, especially as she got older." A proud woman, Ida Bolender would just as soon people think she was hearing what they were telling her when she really wasn"t. Thus her seeming aloofness. It wasn"t a fair characterization. In fact, Ida had opened her home to underprivileged children during the challenging 1920s. This was a time when scores of young people were being put up for adoption, due in part to a floundering economy, and also to the needs of a growing number of young women who felt a calling to enter the workforce. Though she certainly had no interest in business, Ida did want a better life, one her husband"s meager salary as a mailman could not provide. The extra income she received from foster parenting may not have been plentiful, but it was enough for her to feel some worth and also a certain degree of independence. Moreover, as her foster daughter Nancy Jeffrey explains, "One of the reasons Ida may have appeared disconnected was because she was hearing impaired and without the benefit of a hearing aid. She often had to read lips, especially as she got older." A proud woman, Ida Bolender would just as soon people think she was hearing what they were telling her when she really wasn"t. Thus her seeming aloofness.
The daughter of devout Baptists, Ida was taught that an abundance of pride was the devil"s work. Therefore, she rarely acknowledged her own achievements, such as good grades in school or being popular with other students. Her parents were strict and uncompromising. Every day was a test from G.o.d. Pa.s.s or fail (and she usually failed, according to them anyway, especially her mother), it was sure to be a long and difficult exam. Her parents had instilled in her so urgent a sense of responsibility and duty, she"d allowed her youth on a small farm near Buffalo, New York, to pa.s.s her by without ever having much fun.
In 1918, after living a chaste early adulthood, Ida married a quiet, gentle man named Albert Wayne-known primarily by his middle name. He"d also been raised on a farm, this one in Brown County, Ohio. Since he had been brought up with essentially the same beliefs as Ida, he had simple, attainable goals for the future. In fact, the couple had no plans when they married, other than to work hard, pray hard, and try to live what they both viewed as decent lives based on scripture. They moved to California in 1919.
Besides foster caring, Ida had few pa.s.sions in life-and, truthfully, being a foster mother wasn"t as much a pa.s.sion for her as it was a duty. However, as a fervent member of her church, she was quite enthusiastic about fund-raising. The church held bake sales and raffles, but its most lucrative venture by far was its widely praised rummage sale. Women would travel great distances to pick through the discarded belongings of the church"s many parishioners while searching for just the right hat, dress, or other clothing at a price that could be considered a "steal." However, not only would the possessions of churchgoers go up for sale, but other items as well. According to the family"s history, in order to enhance her own sales table, Ida formed a secret alliance with a woman named Anna Raymond, a seamstress in Hollywood who would bring boxes chock-full of items to the Bolender residence on a monthly basis. These pieces were mostly garments that Ida would never think to wear, such as colorful flapper dresses, ornate costume jewelry with enormous imitation stones, or high-heeled shoes that made Ida shudder. It"s a safe a.s.sumption that these items were leftovers from various film productions, but just how Miss Raymond happened to come into possession of them is, all these years later, impossible to ascertain.
Over the years, Ida often spoke to other members of her congregation about certain women in her community she felt were "too boastful." Inevitably, these were ladies who flaunted their femininity to get what they wanted, conduct Ida viewed as tantamount to a mortal sin. As it would happen, a woman whose behavior fit just that description came into Ida"s life in a place that might seem ironic: the Hawthorne Community Church. Indeed, whenever Ida Bolender stood watch at her rummage-sale table, she looked forward to selling as much of her tacky merchandise as possible to one eager customer in particular-her neighbor across the street, Della Monroe.
Norma Jeane"s Grandmother, Della.
By 1925 standards, forty-nine-year-old Della Monroe was certainly not a wealthy woman, but she still had a craving for extravagance. Without the ability to purchase particularly lavish items at retail prices, she hunted down bargains wherever she could-even in places where she didn"t feel particularly welcome. Descending the steps into the bas.e.m.e.nt of the Hawthorne Community Church, she had to have heard the judgmental whispers of those who wouldn"t have used the word "elegant" to describe her secondhand fur and costume jewelry.
In her prime, Della had been a spectacularly attractive woman. Back then, a mane of full, thick brunette tresses had framed an almost constantly smiling face set with stunning blue-green eyes. She was eye-catching and full of life. However, time had not been kind. Her skin, once so porcelain and smooth, had loosened and lost its glow. Now she appeared unkempt, her hair thinning to wiry locks that seemed to lie lifeless atop her head. It hadn"t simply been the expected signs of aging that altered Della, either. She had once been gregarious with a quick wit and exuberant personality. There had always been a dazzling smile under her bright red lipstick. However, over time, the light behind her eyes began to flicker. As she got older, she became remote. It was as if a great distance had come between the world and Della Monroe"s experience of it. Everyone she knew noticed this gradual change in her, but no one knew what to do about it. Actually, it had started with the birth of her children.
"The way I heard it, she would fall into deep depressions after having the babies," recalled Louise Adams, whose mother was the secretary to Reverend Charles Lewis, pastor of the Hawthorne Community Church. "My mother said [Della] would cry uncontrollably at the drop of a dime [sic], and she had never been one to cry. Then she would be fine. But a few days later, she would start crying again, for no apparent reason, and she would cry for days, or at least it seemed like it. Then, fine. She wouldn"t eat and got painfully thin. She couldn"t sleep. No one knew what was wrong with her, but there wasn"t much anyone could do back then but just worry about it and hope for the best."
It"s possible, of course, that Della Monroe was suffering from postpartum depression. However, with modern obstetrics procedures just starting to be developed in the early 1900s, grave symptoms such as hers were often ignored or just attributed to "baby blues" and not taken seriously. In her case, though, whatever was happening to her as a result of her pregnancies would be a harbinger of things to come. Of course no one knows for sure, but the family"s belief is that Della"s pregnancies triggered a mental illness in her that was never reversed.
Time, however, could not steal from Della the memories of her untamed youth. She had often welcomed the wandering eyes of the opposite s.e.x, which threatened her peers and made the possibility of having many close girlfriends remote. Therefore, when she sought companionship, it was usually in the company of men. Indeed, earlier in her life, Della would happily share a stiff drink with a fellow, often with no desire at all for any sort of romantic relationship. She was "one of the guys" during many happy hours at the local watering hole, which led to a good number of groggy late-night encounters of the intimate variety, and of course the inevitable tongue-wagging of women familiar with her behavior.
Now past her prime, Della was living with a man named Charles Grainger at her home on East Rhode Island Street in Hawthorne. She insisted they were man and wife, but no one ever saw a marriage certificate-nor did anyone believe they"d ever been wed. Though her desire for male attention had weakened, Della"s instinct to package herself in what she considered stylish attire remained-thus her visit to church on this day in October 1925, where she would meet her neighbor across the street, thirty-seven-year-old Ida Bolender.
Obviously, Della"s life had been very different from Ida"s. Whereas Della had always been a free spirit who enjoyed what would most certainly have been considered in the early 1900s a loose morality, Ida"s personality was constricted by a rigid religious code. Had Ida been aware of some of Della"s past experiences, she wouldn"t have allowed herself to even share the same oxygen with her. As it was, the two women formed an unusual bond. In fact, for her wardrobe, Della had come to depend upon the constant stream of garish garments and baubles found only at Ida"s booth at the rummage sale. Over time, Ida would even leave a smattering of the gaudiest of merchandise on display-clothing and other items that no one else would ever think to purchase-knowing full well that even these most offensive pieces would be eagerly snapped up by Della.
As Della"s style "dealer," Ida made a decent amount of money for the church-and possibly even a bit for herself. Eventually, she even opened up her home to Della in order that she might purchase items without waiting for the next sale. On one such occasion in October 1925, Della noted how well-behaved two foster children being raised by Ida were, and then mentioned that her own daughter, twenty-five-year-old Gladys Baker, was pregnant with her third child. The pregnancy posed quite a problem, she explained, since Gladys was not married. Gladys had been pursuing a career in Hollywood, Della said, working for Consolidated Studios as a film cutter. In fact, as she went on, Della had actually given her some of the clothing she had purchased from Ida. She wanted to brighten her daughter"s days, she said, because she"d never been the same since giving up the first two children she bore. Both were now being raised by her ex-husband and his new wife. After losing them, Della admitted, Gladys became a heavy drinker.
As it happened, Della was getting ready to join her husband, Charles, in India, where he"d been transferred by the oil company for which he worked. She was going to leave in December. He didn"t seem anxious to see her, though. In a postcard to her, he wrote that he felt the trip would be "too much" for her and that perhaps she should "stay where you are for an indefinite period of time." Della"s mind was made up, though. However, she told Ida that she was worried about what might happen to Gladys and the new baby. "I"m not going to be around to see to it that things are okay," she explained. Ida said, "Well, maybe you should stay behind until you know they are okay." Della thought it over a moment and decided, "No, I don"t think so."
During that conversation, Ida became very concerned not so much about what might happen to Gladys, but over the future of the child she was carrying. It was clear to Ida that not only were Gladys"s work schedule and social life going to be an issue in raising the new baby, but there was also another undeniable truth, one to do with morality. There was a question about the paternity of Gladys"s pregnancy. Della said that she didn"t quite know who the father of her daughter"s baby was-and any number of men could have been candidates. This unfortunate situation was more than just distasteful to Ida, it was unseemly. In her view, neither Gladys-given what she had heard-nor Della-given what she had seen-was, as she put it, "following the Lord"s path."
Ida quizzed Della about just how Gladys planned to raise the child, especially if Della was to be out of the country. Would it be in accordance with G.o.d"s plan? Had they considered what school the young one would attend? Was she going to be able to set a good example for him or her? As Ida saw it, it was an untenable situation, so much that she could barely believe they were even discussing it. In her mind, all questions were moot since Gladys wasn"t even married, "and in this situation, she most certainly should not be allowed to keep that child," she said.
"And what about you, Della?" Ida asked with a faint smile. "You know, you"re not the most stable woman, either."
Della-according to a later recollection-seemed to not be able to connect to what Ida was talking about. On some level, though, she must have known that Ida was referring to her unpredictable mood swings, and especially her insistence of late that she was the subject of some sort of surveillance. "When I leave the house, I know know I"m being followed," she had often told Ida. "As long as they know that I know, I feel I"m fine. However, I never let my guard down. I"m not a stupid woman." Paranoia had become such a recurring theme in Della"s life that her friends had begun to disregard it, even if they did find it upsetting. I"m being followed," she had often told Ida. "As long as they know that I know, I feel I"m fine. However, I never let my guard down. I"m not a stupid woman." Paranoia had become such a recurring theme in Della"s life that her friends had begun to disregard it, even if they did find it upsetting.
"If Gladys can"t raise that child," Ida told her candidly, "I certainly don"t think you can, either."
"It doesn"t make any difference," Della told her, "because I"m going to India, and I"m not coming back."
None of this made sense to Ida. She was twelve years younger than Della, but it was Della who must have seemed like the immature one to her. At the very least, she couldn"t imagine how this woman could leave the country when her child was in trouble. Moreover, she couldn"t fathom how any mother could ever have allowed her daughter to find herself in such a predicament. "You need to think about this," Ida told Della. "You and I should discuss this further. We"re both mothers. We know what"s right."
In the days to come, Ida"s continuing attempts to alert Della to the seriousness of the task at hand would lead to an unexpected set of circ.u.mstances that would alter the lives of everyone involved. No doubt directly related to Ida"s finger-wagging, the day soon came when Della was able to convince Gladys that she should not be the primary caretaker of the baby she was carrying. First of all, it couldn"t be denied that she was a woman to whom the night called-and when it did, she answered with a resounding yes. Also, she too had certain other... problems. Indeed, someone was following Gladys as well. Maybe the same person who had been following Della? Mother and daughter understood each other"s fears because they shared them.
Eventually, Della Monroe successfully convinced her daughter, Gladys Baker, that when she had her baby, she should "temporarily" place it in the care of the very religious and righteous woman who lived nearby-Ida Bolender.
Marilyn"s Mother, Gladys.
From all outward appearances, Gladys Pearl Monroe had always seemed like such a happy youngster, surprising considering her tumultuous youth. She was born on May 27, 1900, to Otis and Della Monroe in Piedras Negras, Mexico-at the time called Porfirio Diaz, after Mexico"s president Jose de la Cruz Porfirio Diaz Mori. It was here that her father had found employment with the Pacific Electric Railway. Soon after her birth, the family moved to Los Angeles.
Gladys"s mother, Della, always caused heads to turn as she sashayed down the street. However, she was apparently as tough as she was eye-catching. Early photographs taken of Gladys"s parents show a handsome, somewhat robust woman with a severe countenance-that would be Della-standing next to a gentleman who looks rather scared to death-Otis. If he ever thought he would be able to tell Della what to do, Otis soon found out it was not the case. Della was never one to acquiesce to anyone"s will. Therefore, the arguments between them started on their honeymoon and never ceased. In one of the family"s photographs Otis has a deep scar on his cheek, and there"s no telling how he got it. However, one thing is clear: He doesn"t have it in pictures taken before he married Della.
Soon, Gladys and her brother, Marion Otis-born in 1905-became accustomed to a transient lifestyle as the Monroes moved in and out of nearly a dozen different rented apartments and houses in California between 1903 and 1909. Otis, who couldn"t keep a job, began to live a reckless and cavalier life. Not only was his drinking a growing problem, but he also started having sudden blackouts and frightening memory lapses.
By 1908, when Otis was just forty-one, his health and emotional state had declined so rapidly it became clear that something was very wrong with him. He was temperamental and unpredictable, and his body seemed to always be in a tremulous state. His headaches would become so numbing and severe, he could barely stand. When not physically debilitated, he was filled with blind rage. On occasions when he would fly into fits of fury, Della would have no choice but to take their frightened children to a neighbor"s home and wait for the storm to pa.s.s. Doctors were at a complete loss to explain Otis"s mystifying behavior. "Otis has lost his mind, and I"m just going to have to come to terms with it," Della wrote in a letter at this time.
In 1909, Otis Monroe died of syphilis of the brain. He was just forty-three. "How will I explain this to my children?" Della asked the doctors at the hospital. Because the professionals were of no help to her, Della simply told Gladys, nine, and Marion, four, that their father had gone mad and died. In years to come, some family members would argue that he actually hadn"t died an insane man but rather had contracted syphilis, which then led to his death. Others would say that it was precisely because of the syphilis that he had gone insane. Back in the early 1900s, though, such distinctions were generally not made outside of the medical community. "He went nuts and then went to G.o.d," is how Della described it, and she hoped that would be the end of it. However, this would most certainly not be the end of it. In fact, a fear of genetic madness would hold the Monroe descendants in its suffocating grip for decades to come-and it all started with Della"s declaration that Otis Monroe"s death was the direct result of insanity.
After Otis pa.s.sed away, Della-just thirty-three years old-was on her own with two small children. She was attractive and usually fun to be around, but she could also be unpredictably volatile and, if in one of her moods of despair, even morose. In March 1912, when she was thirty-five, she married a railway switchman supervisor named Lyle Arthur Graves, six years her junior. That union was over quickly. After the divorce, Della began to date an a.s.sortment of characters, some respectable but most unsavory, who came and went from her life swiftly, most not before spending at least one amorous night with her. In fact, it was at this time, after the end of her second marriage, that Della developed a looser sense of morality and didn"t seem particularly concerned as to how it might adversely affect or otherwise influence her two children, Gladys, who was now twelve, and Marion, seven.
By the time she was a teenager, Gladys Monroe wore her chestnut brown hair-though it sometimes appeared more reddish-in soft waves and long curls that cascaded luxuriously down her back. She was a real looker, with Wedgwood blue eyes, a full mouth, a dazzling set of white teeth, and skin that glowed with vitality. Enviably thin and pet.i.te, as an adult she would grow to only five feet tall. However, an oversized personality and captivating quality made her well-liked at school and the life of any party.
When Gladys was about sixteen, her mother banished Marion, eleven, from the household. Because he was constantly in trouble at school and obstreperous at home, Della didn"t know what to do with him. Disciplining him didn"t seem to work. Stubborn and willful, he tried her patience. Therefore, one morning she collected all of his toys and tossed them into a pillowcase. Then, as Marion cried softly in the backseat and Gladys sat quietly staring straight ahead in the front pa.s.senger seat, Della drove to San Diego. There she left the boy in the care of a cousin, and that was the last anyone ever heard of Marion.
At about this same time, in 1916, Gladys met a young businessman named John Newton Baker, known primarily as Jasper. He"d just moved to Los Angeles from Kentucky after serving in the military. Jasper was tall and lanky with a lean, angular face and straight dark hair that he parted with great purpose to one side. Seeming genuinely interested in Gladys from the start, he not only wanted to hear about her many problems at home but also a.s.sist her in coming up with reasonable solutions. Twelve years her senior, he had more experience than her and seemed eager to insulate her from her troubled life and maybe even protect her from future heartache. Therefore, when he asked for her hand in marriage, she eagerly agreed. Della not only accepted the coupling of her young daughter with Jasper, she wholeheartedly encouraged it.
Sixteen-year-old Gladys Monroe took John Newton Baker as her husband on May 17, 1917. They had two children, Robert Kermit-nicknamed Jack-and Berniece, before their marriage began to crumble. It turned out that Jasper was an alcoholic with a violent temper. He beat Gladys, making her young life a misery, often striking her about the head and twice giving her concussions. When she finally divorced him, Jasper took both of their children and moved to Kentucky because he"d decided she"d been an unfit mother. Gladys didn"t have any say in the matter, and she certainly didn"t have the money for an attorney.
In 1924 Gladys, who was twenty-four, took a second husband, Martin Edward Mortenson-known as Edward. The twenty-seven-year-old son of Norwegian immigrants, Mortenson was not cla.s.sically handsome in the strictest sense of the word, but he was nonetheless a good-looking man with a broad brow, high cheekbones, and a full, wide smile. Tall and solid, he seemed like a stable and amiable fellow who only wanted to please and take care of his new wife. It was impossible for him to do so, though, because by the time she was in her mid-twenties it was clear that something was terribly wrong with Gladys. Like her mother, she began experiencing mood swings and crying jags. With the marriage all but over after just four months, Edward Mortenson filed for divorce.
Once she felt free of her matrimonial bonds, though she was not yet divorced, Gladys Baker mirrored her mother"s behavior and became notoriously promiscuous. Taking many lovers, she developed a terrible reputation at her job at Consolidated Studios, where she worked as a film editor or "cutter." Soon she began an affair with a man named Charles Stanley Gifford, a sales manager at the company.
Stanley Gifford was born in Newport, Rhode Island, in 1898. When he was twenty-seven, he moved to Los Angeles after an unsuccessful marriage during which he had fathered two children. He found employment at Consolidated, as foreman of the day shift. When Gladys met him, she fell hard. A good-looking man with a thin mustache, dark eyes, and wavy jet black hair, he was both elegant and distinctive. Debonair and personable, he was a real lady-killer. He had a quick wit, a wonderful sense of humor, and, as someone who came from a family with a little money, he also enjoyed the occasional game of polo. His family had made a fortune in the shipbuilding business and Gifford was well-off enough to be able to afford two houses in Los Angeles during the Depression, a bleak period when most people were fortunate to even have one.
"He had a decent job," says his son, Charles Stanley Gifford, who today is eighty-six years old. "He had a good life. Along with polo, he enjoyed hunting and fishing. I was born in 1922, and he and my mother divorced in 1926. Still, he was a wonderful father to both me and my sister. I knew the only three women that he seriously dated over the years. He married two of them, my mother and then his second wife, Mary. Gladys was not one of the three women. The other one was a Catholic woman, a very nice lady he decided not to marry for his own personal reasons-not Gladys. I don"t believe he was ever serious about Gladys, or he would have told me about it at one time or another over the years. He said he knew her, they dated casually, but that was it. The truth is that Gladys was a very attractive woman and she dated many people back then."
In late 1925, Gladys learned that she was pregnant. But who was the father? It"s been published repeatedly over the years that Gladys didn"t have a clue, that she wasn"t keeping score of her lovers, she was just enjoying them. That"s not the case, though. In fact, she always insisted that Stanley Gifford was the father of her child, and she never wavered from that belief. Biographers and other historians over the years have simply not wanted to believe her, citing her mental instability and promiscuity as reasons for doubt. However, it seems unfair to conclude that just because Gladys had serious problems, her identification of her daughter"s paternity should be completely dismissed, especially since she was so consistent about it over the years.
In 1925, when Gladys told Stanley Gifford he was the father of her child, he refused to accept responsibility, claiming that he knew she"d been with other men. The more she insisted, the angrier he got, until finally he stormed off. She would see him a few more times, but he simply never believed her. She knew she would have to raise the child on her own, and was prepared to do so-or at least that"s what she thought at the time.
In the 1940s, as we will later see, Gladys would continue to insist that Gifford was the baby"s father. Then, in the 1960s, she would again confirm what she had been saying all along about him. In fact, in 1962, right after the death of Marilyn Monroe, Gladys discussed the actress"s paternity with Rose Anne Cooper, a young nurse"s aide at the Rock Haven Sanitarium in La Crescenta. Cooper was just twenty at the time she worked there. Gladys was sixty-two. "She was very clear," recalls Cooper. "She said that she"d been intimate with a number of men, and she talked about her past, openly saying that when she was young she was, as she put it, "very wild." However, she said that the only kind of intimacy that could have resulted in a pregnancy was what she had shared with the man she called "Stan Gifford." She said she had always been bothered by the fact that no one seemed to want to believe her, but that it was the truth. She said that even her own mother didn"t believe her. "Everyone thought I was lying," she said, "or that I just didn"t know. I knew. I always always knew." " knew." "
Norma Jeane Is Born.
On the morning of June 1, 1926, Della Monroe"s daughter, Gladys Baker, gave birth to a child in the charity ward of the Los Angeles General Hospital (known today as the Los Angeles County USC Medical Center at 1200 North State Street). A collection had been taken up from concerned coworkers at Consolidated in order to tide Gladys over until she could return to work, and also for any medical expenses that would not be covered by charity. As she lay in the recovery room, bone tired from hours of labor, there was of course no expectant father pacing in a waiting room hoping for news about his child"s arrival. Even her own mother was nowhere in sight since she"d taken off for India the previous December.
It should be remembered that during this period, there was a tremendous judgment on single mothers. No doubt Gladys could feel the condemnation directed toward her from the nurses at General Hospital. The paperwork she was required to fill out upon admittance did little to quiet any uneasiness she felt because of her situation. For instance, one of the first questions asked on the form was the father"s name. Gladys wrote that a man named Edward Mortenson was the baby"s father, even though she had been separated from him for some time. She also misspelled his name as "Mortensen." That she and the father didn"t share a last name was controversial enough, but it was the response to the next question that was sure to start tongues wagging: father"s residence. Examining the paperwork from that day as filled out by Gladys, the word "unknown" appears to be scrawled in a bolder, more deliberate handwriting. Indeed, filling out this paperwork had to have been difficult for her. She provided her address, which was no problem. Then, in answering the question of how many children she"d previously given birth to, her reply was "three"-odd, since she hadn"t yet had the third. The next question-"Number of children of this mother now living"-was either answered incorrectly or dishonestly, depending on her understanding of it. She said that only "one" of those three was still living. Of course, she had borne two other children, who were presently being raised by her ex-husband, Jasper. Yes, Gladys did have a colorful past. Maybe she"d been deliberately dishonest in order to garner sympathy from an attending nurse. Perhaps she thought that if her first two children had pa.s.sed away, she could be forgiven for having this third child out of wedlock. Whatever her reasoning, the questions put to her and the way she responded certainly suggest that the day was difficult her. Years later she told a friend, "I keep dreaming of that [hospital]. Everything seemed bright, too bright, and the nurses all seemed like nuns to me, mean awful nuns."
As is the case with many women, Gladys had a major emotional spiral immediately after the birth. Postpartum depression may have been a factor. It certainly appeared to many people in the family that her mother, Della, suffered from it as well-and maybe never got past it. Whatever the case, Gladys seemed disoriented and troubled for many days after giving birth. When the nurse brought the baby into the recovery room, the tiny child was placed on her mother"s chest. "She just held her, with her eyes closed," Della later wrote to a family member when speaking of that moment, even though she wasn"t present for it. "I feel awful. I know she can"t keep [the baby]. She is not well. She needs to get her mind right first."
Gladys would have two weeks with her baby girl before she would have to do what she had agreed to do: Before her mother had left town, Gladys had agreed to hand over the infant to a stranger, Ida Bolender. During those two weeks, something dreadful occurred, making it clear that the arrangement made between Della and Ida was necessary. A friend and coworker of Gladys"s at Consolidated Studios named Grace McKee came by the house to take care of the baby for an afternoon while Gladys went grocery shopping. (Grace would play a very important role in the lives of Gladys and Norma Jeane in years to come.) When Gladys returned, she went into a manic state for reasons unknown and began to accuse Grace of poisoning the child. One thing led to another, and somehow Grace ended up on the receiving end of a kitchen knife, stabbed by Gladys. Though Grace"s wound was superficial, it was clear that Gladys could be a danger to her baby. After that violent episode, which panicked and bewildered everyone, it was an easy decision to turn Norma Jeane over to Ida.
The emotionally charged transfer happened on June 13, 1926-that was the sad day Gladys Baker showed up on Ida Bolender"s doorstep with a two-week-old infant. After a long and difficult farewell, she walked out the front door of Ida"s house without the child named Norma Jeane Mortensen. * * Norma Jeane was a help less infant who had entered this world without any form of welcome. There was no freshly furnished nursery awaiting her, no tiny wardrobe, and in fact no one on earth whose future plans included her. She spent the first few days of her life simply being sustained, not nurtured. She was a burden, one that needed to be unloaded. No one can know for certain, but it very well may have been at a tender age that she began to sense that something wasn"t quite right in her world-that there wasn"t sufficient attention being paid her. Indeed, she would spend much of the rest of her life trying to change those circ.u.mstances-but to do so, she would need to one day become... Marilyn Monroe. Norma Jeane was a help less infant who had entered this world without any form of welcome. There was no freshly furnished nursery awaiting her, no tiny wardrobe, and in fact no one on earth whose future plans included her. She spent the first few days of her life simply being sustained, not nurtured. She was a burden, one that needed to be unloaded. No one can know for certain, but it very well may have been at a tender age that she began to sense that something wasn"t quite right in her world-that there wasn"t sufficient attention being paid her. Indeed, she would spend much of the rest of her life trying to change those circ.u.mstances-but to do so, she would need to one day become... Marilyn Monroe.
Della"s Terrible Fate.
Within just days of surrendering Norma Jeane to Ida and Albert Wayne Bolender, Gladys Baker began to feel remorse over the decision. "It occurred to her, I think, that maybe she could have done for this child what her mother had not done for her-love her, be there for her," said one of her family members. The deal was that she would pay the Bolenders twenty-five dollars per week to raise Norma Jeane, which she did the entire time Norma Jeane was in their care. In the beginning, though, she gave them a few extra dollars a week so that she could stay with them on occasional weekends and at least be with her baby. That didn"t last long, though. "The truth was that Gladys had a problem watching Ida raise her child," said Mary Thomas-Strong, whose mother was a close friend of Ida"s. "Ida could be strict and controlling. She felt she knew what was right. She was a professional mother, in a sense. She wanted to have her way with Norma Jeane and it was hard for Gladys to be on the sidelines. Therefore, she moved back to Hollywood determined to visit the baby every weekend. She was back and forth a lot." In a 1930 census the Bolenders and Gladys were reported to live all in the same household.
Adding to Gladys"s bewilderment at this time was the arrival of her mother, Della, who returned from India with malaria. Her "husband" Charles Grainger decided not to come back to the States with her, leaving most people to believe that their relationship was over. Della was delusional and sick with a fever for many weeks. It took a terrible toll on her.
In summer of 1927, Della walked across the street from her home to the Bolenders" with the intention of seeing Norma Jeane. She banged on the front door, but Ida didn"t want to let her into the house. It"s unknown why Ida took this position, but she may have felt that Della was out of control and a danger to the baby. Indeed, Della broke the door"s gla.s.s with her elbow and let herself in. The family history has it that she confronted Ida and said she believed that Norma Jeane was dead and that no one had told her or Gladys. Alarmed and not knowing how to handle the situation, Ida let Della see Norma Jeane sleeping in her crib. She went to get Della a gla.s.s of water and when she returned she found Della smothering the baby with a pillow. "Ida became almost hysterical," said one friend of Gladys"s in the telling of the story. "She grabbed the child. Della said that the baby"s pillow had slipped and she was simply readjusting it. But Ida was very upset and demanded that Della leave the house." Marilyn Monroe-and even the Bolenders-would tell variations of this story many times over the years.
"Ida and Wayne called the police," said Mary Thomas-Strong. "When they came, they found a very mixed-up Della babbling incoherently. With Norma Jeane crying in her bedroom, and Ida shouting accusations at Della, it was such a chaotic scene the police didn"t know what to do about it. So they escorted Della back to her house and left her there. What they should have done was taken her to a hospital."