"Oh! There is one man!" said Aloysius, with a smile.
"Yes, good father!" And Morgana left the pa.s.sion-flowers and moved slowly back to her seat on the stone-bench--"There is one man! He was my third and last experience of happiness. When I first met him, my whole heart gave itself in one big pulsation--but like a wave of the sea, the pulsation recoiled, and never again beat on the grim rock of human egoism!" She laughed gaily, and a delicate colour flushed her face. "But I was happy while the "wave" lasted,--and when it broke, I still played on the sh.o.r.e with its pretty foam-bells."
"You loved this man?" and the priest"s grave eyes dwelt on her searchingly.
"I suppose so--for the moment! Yet no,--it was not love--it was just an "attraction"--he was--he IS--clever, and thinks he can change the face of the world. But he is fooling with fire! I tell you I tried to help him--for he is deadly poor. But he would have none of me nor of what he calls my "vulgar wealth." This is a case in point where wealth is useless! You see?"
Don Aloysius was silent.
"Then"--Morgana went on--"Alison is right. The witchery of the Northern Highlands is in my blood,--never a love for me--alone I am--alone I must be!--never a love for a "fey" woman!"
Over the priest"s face there pa.s.sed a quiver as of sudden pain.
"You wrong yourself, my child"--he said, slowly--"You wrong yourself very greatly! You have a power of which you appear to be unconscious--a great, a terrible power!--you compel interest--you attract the love of others even if you yourself love no one--you draw the very soul out of a man--"
He paused, abruptly.
Morgana raised her eyes,--the blue lightning gleam flashed in their depths.
"Ah, yes!" she half whispered--"I know I have THAT power!"
Don Aloysius rose to his feet.
"Then,--if you know it,--in G.o.d"s name do not exercise it!" he said.
His voice shook--and with his right hand he gripped the crucifix he wore as though it were a weapon of self-defence. Morgana looked at him wonderingly for a moment,--then drooped her head with a strange little air of sudden penitence. Aloysius drew a quick sharp breath as of one in effort,--then he spoke again, unsteadily--
"I mean"--he said, smiling forcedly--"I mean that you should not--you should not break the heart of--of--the poor Giulio for instance!... it would not be kind."
She lifted her eyes again and fixed them on him.
"No, it would not be kind!" she said, softly--"Dear Don Aloysius, I understand! And I will remember!" She glanced at a tiny diamond-set watch-bracelet on her wrist--"How late it is!--nearly all the morning gone! I have kept you so long listening to my talk--forgive me! I will run away now and leave you to think about my "intervals" of happiness,--will you?--they are so few compared to yours!"
"Mine?" he echoed amazedly.
"Yes, indeed!--yours! Your whole life is an interval of happiness between this world and the next, because you are satisfied in the service of G.o.d!"
"A poor service!" he said, turning his gaze away from her elfin figure and shining hair--"Unworthy,--shameful!--marred by sin at every moment!
A priest of the Church must learn to do without happiness such as ordinary life can give--and without love,--such as woman may give--but--after all--the sacrifice is little."
She smiled at him, sweetly--tenderly,
"Very little!" she said--"So little that it is not worth a regret!
Good-bye! But not for long! Come and see me soon!"
Moving across the cloister with her light step she seemed to float through the sunshine like a part of it, and as she disappeared a kind of shadow fell, though no cloud obscured the sun. Don Aloysius watched her till she had vanished,--then turned aside into a small chapel opening out on the cloistered square--a chapel which formed part of the monastic house to which he belonged as Superior,--and there, within that still, incense-sweetened sanctuary, he knelt before the n.o.ble, pictured Head of the Man of Sorrows in silent confession and prayer.
CHAPTER X
Roger Seaton was a man of many philosophies. He had one for every day in the week, yet none wherewith to thoroughly satisfy himself. While still a mere lad he had taken to the study of science as a duck takes to water,--no new discovery or even suggestion of a new discovery missed his instant and close attention. His avidity for learning was insatiable,--his intense and insistent curiosity on all matters of chemistry gave a knife-like edge to the quality of his brain, making it sharp, brilliant and incisive. To him the ordinary social and political interests of the world were simply absurd. The idea that the greater majority of men should be created for no higher purpose than those of an insect, just to live, eat, breed, and die, was to him preposterous.
"Think of it!" he would exclaim--"All this wondrous organisation of our planet for THAT! For a biped so stupid as to see nothing in his surroundings but conveniences for satisfying his stomach and his pa.s.sions! We men are educated chiefly in order to learn how to make money, and all we can do with the money WHEN made, is to build houses to live in, eat as much as we want and more, and breed children to whom we leave all the stuff we have earned, and who either waste it or add to it, whichever suits their selfishness best. Such lives are absolutely useless,--they repeat the same old round, leading nowhere.
Occasionally, in the course of centuries a real Brain is born--and at once, all who are merely Bodies leap up against it, like famished wolves, striving to tear it to pieces and devour it--if it survives the attack its worth is only recognised long after its owner has perished.
The whole scheme is manifestly unintelligent and ludicrous, but it is not intended to be so--of that I am sure. THERE MUST BE SOMETHING ELSE!"
When urged to explain what he conceived as this "something else," he would answer--
"There has always been "something else" in our environment,--something that stupid humanity has taken centuries to discover. Sound-waves for example--light-rays,--electricity--these have been freely at our service from the beginning. Electricity might have been used ages ago, had not dull-witted man refused to find anything better for lighting purposes than an oil-lamp or a tallow candle! If, in past periods, he had been told "there is something else"--he would have laughed his informant to scorn. So with our blundering methods of living--"there is something else"--not after death, but NOW and HERE. We are going about in the darkness with a candle when a great force of wider light is all round us, only awaiting connection and application to our uses."
Those who heard him speak in this way--(and they were few, for Seaton seldom discussed his theories with others)--convinced themselves that he was either a fool or a madman,--the usual verdict given for any human being who dares break away from convention and adopt an original line of thought and action. But they came to the conclusion that as he was direfully poor, and nevertheless refused various opportunities of making money, his folly or his madness would be brought home to him sooner or later by strong necessity, and that he would then either arrive at a sane every-day realisation of "things as they are"--or else be put away in an asylum and quietly forgotten. This being the sagacious opinion of those who knew him best, there was a considerable flutter in such limited American circles as call themselves "upper"
when the wealthiest young woman in the States, Morgana Royal, suddenly elected to know him and to bring him into prominent notice at her parties as "the most wonderful genius of the time"--"a man whose scientific discoveries might change the very face of the globe"--and other fantastically exaggerated descriptions of her own which he himself strongly repudiated and resented. Gossip ran amok concerning the two, and it was generally agreed that if the "madman" of science were to become the husband of a woman multi-millionaire, he would not have to be considered so mad after all! But the expected romance did not materialise,--there came apparently a gradual "cooling off" in the sentiments of both parties concerned,--and though Roger Seaton was still occasionally seen with Morgana in her automobile, in her opera-box, or at her receptions, his appearances were fewer, and other men, in fact many other men, were more openly encouraged and flattered,--Morgana herself showing as much indifference towards him as she had at first shown interest. When, therefore, he suddenly left the social scene of action, his acquaintances surmised that he had got an abrupt dismissal, or as they more brusquely expressed it--"the game"s up"!
"He"s lost his chance!" they said, shaking their heads forlornly--"And he"s poorer than Job! He"ll be selling newspapers in the cars for a living by and by!"
However, he was never met engaged in this lucrative way of business,--he simply turned his back on everybody, Morgana Royal included, and so far as "society" was concerned, just disappeared. In the "hut of the dying" on that lonely hill-slope in California he was happy, feeling a relief from infinite boredom, and thankful to be alone. He had much to think about and much to do--inhabited places and the movement of people were to him tedious and fatiguing, and he decided that nature,--wild nature in a solitary and savage aspect,--would suit his speculative and creative tendencies best. Yet, like all human beings, he had his odd, almost child-like moods, inexplicable even to himself--moods illogical, almost pettish, and wholly incongruous with his own accepted principles of reasoning. For instance, he maintained that women had neither attraction nor interest for him--yet he found himself singularly displeased when after two or three days of utter solitude, and when he was rather eagerly expecting Manella to arrive with the new milk which was his staple food, a lanky, red-haired ugly boy appeared instead of her--a boy who slouched along, swinging the milk pail in one hand and clutching a half-munched slice of pine-apple in the other.
"h.e.l.lo--o!" called this individual. "Not dead yet?"
For answer Seaton strode forward and taking the milk-pail from him gripped him by the dirty cotton shirt and gave him a brief but severe shaking.
"No,--not dead yet!" he said--"You insolent young monkey! Who are you?"
The boy wriggled in his captor"s clutch, and tried to squirm himself out of it.
"I"m--I"m Jake--they calls me Irish Jake"--he gasped--"O Blessed Mary!--my breath! I clean the knives at the Plaza--"
"I"ll clean knives for you presently!" remarked Seaton, with a threatening gesture--"Yes, Irish Jake, I will! Who sent you here?"
"SHE did--oh, Mary mother!" and the youth gave a further wriggle--"Miss Soriso--the girl they call Manella. She told me to say she"s too busy to come herself."
Seaton let go the handful of shirt he had held.
"Too busy to come herself!" he repeated, slowly--then smiled--"Well!
That"s all right!" Here he lifted the pail of milk, took it into his hut and brought it back empty, while "Irish Jake," as the boy had called himself, stood staring--"Tell Miss Soriso that I quite understand! And that I"m delighted to hear she is so busy! Now, let us see!" Here he pulled some money out of his pocket, and fingered a few dirty paper notes--"There, Irish Jake! You"ll find that"s correct. And when you come here again don"t forget your manners! See? Then you may be able to keep that disgraceful shirt of yours on! Otherwise it"s likely to be torn off! If you are Irish you should remember that in very ancient days there used to be manners in the Emerald Isle. Yes, positively! Fine, gracious, lovely manners! It doesn"t look as if that will be ever any more--but we live in hope. Anyway, YOU--you young offspring of an Irish hybrid gorilla--you"d best remember what _I_ say, or there"ll be trouble! And"--here he made a mock solemn bow--"My compliments to Miss Soriso!"
The red-haired youth remained for a moment stock-still with mouth and eyes open,--then, s.n.a.t.c.hing up the empty milk-pail he scampered down the hill-slope at a lightning quick run.
Seaton looked after him with an air of contemptuous amus.e.m.e.nt.
"Ugly little devil!" he soliloquised--"And yet Nature made him,--as she makes many hideous things--in a hurry, I presume, without any time for details or artistic finish. Well!"--here he stretched his arms out with a long sigh--"And the silly girl is "too busy" to come! As if I could not see through THAT little game! She"d give her eyes to come!--fine eyes they are, too! She just thinks she"ll pay me out for being rough with her the other day--she"s got an idea that she"ll vex me, and make me want to see her. She"s right,--I AM vexed!--and I DO want to see her!"
It was mid-morning, and the sun blazed down upon the hill-side with the scorching breath of a volcano. He turned into his hut,--it was a dark, cool little dwelling, comfortable enough for a single inhabitant. There was a camp-bed in one corner--and there were a couple of wicker chairs made for easy transposition into full-length couches if so required, A good sized deal table occupied the centre of the living-room,--and on the table was a clear crystal bowl full of what appeared at a first glance to be plain water, but which on closer observation showed a totally different quality. Unlike water it was never still,--some interior bubbling perpetually moved it to sway and sparkle, throwing out tiny flashes as though the smallest diamond cuttings were striving to escape from it--while it exhaled around itself an atmosphere of extreme coldness and freshness like that of ice. Seaton threw himself indolently into one of wicker chairs by the window--a window which was broad and wide, commanding a full view of distant mountains, and far away to the left a glimpse of sea.
"I am vexed, and I want to see her"--he repeated, speaking aloud to himself--"Now--WHY? Why am I vexed?--and why do I want to see her?
Reason gives no answer! If she were here she would bore me to death. I could do nothing. She would ask me questions--and if I answered them she would not understand,--she is too stupid. She has no comprehension of any thing beyond simple primitive animalism. Now if it were Morgana--"