"Put it back again," she said discontentedly, and turned away to take leave.
But even his great work was not enough for Konrad. In addition, he drudged over a number of short articles. As his name become known in professional circles, he received an increasing number of orders, all of which he accepted and tried to fill.
And one day Lilly found out what the important position was of which he had spoken three weeks before on that never-to-be-forgotten excursion.
"I couldn"t make up my mind until to-day," said Konrad. "But now I have actually decided to take the position. It is a.s.sistant editorship on a magazine. The editor-in-chief called on me himself, and wouldn"t let go of me until I said yes. A fascinating fellow. In spite of his great intellectual ability, a man of childlike innocence. And so frank and friendly. You must get to know him immediately, if you don"t already."
"What is his name?"
"Dr. Salmoni."
CHAPTER XVIII
No. It came about differently.
Fate did not lay its clutch upon her with such rude hands.
Lilly was spared the disgrace of being caught like a criminal, and by an act of volition was enabled to prove that she was not unworthy of the great pa.s.sion that had blessed her life.
After the mention of Dr. Salmoni"s name Lilly feared to venture out on the street with Konrad. She imagined that each person coming behind them must be the dreaded man, who had once stolen upon her in front of the house on Alte Jakobstra.s.se and might be following her now as he had then.
In order to save herself this torture she finally told Konrad that a lady of her acquaintance had visited her the day before and had asked with marked emphasis about the slim young man with whom she had always appeared.
The effect of Lilly"s lie was terrifying.
Konrad said nothing and ate nothing. He paced up and down the room with a wild, hunted expression, and went away at the very moment when their happiest hours were wont to begin.
The following day light was thrown upon the situation.
Konrad came at twilight, paler than usual, his eyes shining unnaturally.
"Listen, darling," he said, "I spent the night thinking everything over, and now I know what I ought to do. We can"t go on this way."
She thought he meant that he must leave her. An icy numbness spread over her body. She looked at him quietly awaiting the death blow.
"Since we belong to each other," he continued, "we have never spoken of your betrothed. That doesn"t mean I didn"t think of him. And you have been very reticent about his friend, Mr. Dehnicke. All I know is Mr.
Dehnicke is now off on a trip and has left you, so to speak, without a guardian."
She forced herself to smile. Why did he prolong the agony?
"I must confess, in the midst of all my happiness, I have always felt that this exploiting of the situation was nothing more nor less than contemptible so far as I myself am concerned. But I am not the one to be considered. The question is: what will become of you? The thing I dreaded from the very first has come to pa.s.s: your friends have begun to notice us together. You can"t ask one person not to tell another. That"s degrading. So your friend will discover everything. He will call you to account, you will be too proud to deny the truth, and the end of the story will be that you will be left alone, utterly unprotected. Because the way things are now, _I_ haven"t even the right to protect you. The thought of it is sickening."
He jumped up, ran his outspread fingers through his imaginary shock of hair, and tramped up and down.
Lilly felt the blood begin to course through her veins again, and with it life and thought.
The dear, n.o.ble, unsuspecting boy!
She came near bursting into laughter. But she refrained herself and said:
"You can be perfectly calm, Konni. Mr. Dehnicke won"t find out, and even if he does, he won"t believe it. Or if he believes it, he will take good care--"
She could not continue. The great innocent eyes troubled her.
"So you still think he will--?"
Konrad also faltered. He, too, was unable to utter the unspeakable.
Lilly regarded the b.u.t.tons on her skirt, and said nothing.
"When is Mr. Dehnicke coming home again?" he asked.
"He"s not certain. He"s gone a-wooing," Lilly replied with a little feeling of triumph. She thought she was saying something which raised her above suspicion in the future--there was still a possibility of suspicion.
"Where is he now?"
"Why do you want to know?"
"I want to speak to him."
Lilly started. She could not believe her ears.
It _could_ not be. Either she must have lost her reason or Konrad.
"Don"t be afraid," he rea.s.sured her. "I know quite well what I owe your reputation. But I should like to find out at last what _he_ thinks of your situation. There"s a man in the United States whom you are pledged to, yet he doesn"t let himself be heard from. He doesn"t come for you.
He doesn"t write. Why doesn"t he write? If he"s ignorant of your whereabouts, he"s perfectly aware that Mr. Dehnicke"s business is known in Berlin. You can"t be sure he"s still alive. At first I tried to explain his silence in various ways. But now I say to myself, he"s either dead or as good as dead. And are you to consider yourself bound?
Should you make your entire social existence dependent upon a sort of guard of honour, which has nothing more to guard? I"d like to hold all this under Mr. Dehnicke"s nose. He"ll have to answer me. Don"t you think he will?"
"Konrad has less worldly knowledge than is permissible," thought Lilly, pityingly, and replied: "But I don"t understand, Konni, what right you have to call a stranger to account."
"That"s my affair," he rejoined, tossing his head defiantly. "I must know if he will set you free. I won"t brook his playing the slave-master over you."
"And I won"t brook your getting yourself into a false position," cried Lilly in reawakened alarm. She already heard blows and pistol shots. "I myself will speak to Mr. Dehnicke. I will free myself, I promise you.
But you, if _you_ go to him, what will he think of me? At best you will merely succeed in compromising me."
He drew himself up to his full height. His eyes flashed victoriously.
"If a man loves you and wants you to be his wife, why should that compromise you?"
It was hot and murky when these words were spoken. The canary ran about on the sand of his cage chirping wearily, his wings drooping; the gold fish hung motionless behind their gla.s.s walls, and the naked monkey whined in its sleep.
The slimy ca.n.a.l water reflected bluish black clouds; a storm hovered in the atmosphere, and this was the thunder-clap.