Sophia laughed softly. "Where are you going? I see you have your bonnet on."
"I am going to Up-Hill. Grandfather Latrigg had a fall yesterday, and that"s a bad thing at his age. Father is quite put out about it."
"Is he going with you?"
"He was, but two of the shepherds from Holler Scree have just come for him. There is something wrong with the flocks."
"Julius?"
"He does not know I am going; and if he did, I should tell him plainly he was not wanted either at Up-Hill, or on the way to it. Ducie thinks little of him, and grandfather Latrigg makes his face like a stone wall when Julius talks his finest."
"They don"t understand Julius. How can they? Steve is their model, and Steve is not the least like Julius."
"I should think not."
"What do you mean?"
"Never mind. Good-by."
She shut the door with more emphasis than she was aware of, and went to her mother for some cordials and dainties to take with her. As she pa.s.sed through the hall the squire called her, and she followed his voice into the small parlor which was emphatically "master"s room."
"I have had very bad news about the Holler Scree flock, Charlotte, and I must away there to see what can be done. Tell Barf Latrigg it is the sheep, and he will understand: he was always one to put the dumb creatures first. The kindest thing that is in your own heart say it to the dear old man for me; will you, Charlotte?"
"You can trust to me, father."
"Yes, I know I can; for that and more too. And there is more. I feel a bit about Stephen. Happen I was less than kind to him the other day.
But I gave you good reasons, Charlotte; and I have such confidence in you, that I said to mother, "You can send Charlotte. There is nothing underhand about her. She knows my will, and she"ll do it." Eh? What?"
"Yes, father: I"ll be square on all four sides with you. But I told you there had been no love-making between me and Steve."
"Steve was doing his best at it. Depend upon it he meant love-making; and I must say I thought you made out to understand him very well. Maybe I was mistaken. Every woman is a new book, and a book by herself; and it isn"t likely I can understand them all."
"Stephen is sure to speak to me about your being so queer to him. Had I not better tell the truth?"
"I have a high opinion of that way. Truth may be blamed, but it can"t be shamed. However, if he was not making love to you at the shearing, won"t you find it a bit difficult to speak your mind? Eh? What?"
"He will understand."
"Ay, I thought so."
"Father, we have never had any secrets, you and me. If I am not to encourage Stephen Latrigg, do you want me to marry Julius Sandal?"
"Well, I never! Such a question! What for?"
"Because, at the very first, I want to tell you that I could not do it--_no way_. I am quite ready to give up my will to your will, and my pleasure to your pleasure. That is my duty; but to marry cousin Julius is a different thing."
"Don"t get too far forward, Charlotte. Julius has not said a word to me about marrying you."
"But he is doing his best at it. Depend upon it he means marrying; and I must say I thought you made out to understand him very well. Maybe I was mistaken. Every man is a new book, and a book by himself; and it is not likely I can understand them all."
"Now you are picking up my own words, and throwing them back at me. That isn"t right. I don"t know whatever to say for myself. Eh? What?"
"Say, "dear Charlotte," and "good-by Charlotte," and take an easy mind with you to Holler Scree, father. As far as I am concerned, I will never grieve you, and never deceive you,--no, not in the least little thing."
So she left him. Her face was bright with smiles, and her words had even a ring of mirth in them; but below all there was a stubborn weight that she could not throw off, a darkness of spirit that no sunshine could brighten. Since Julius had come into their home, home had never been the same. There was a stranger at the table and in all its sweet, familiar places, and she was sure that to her he always would be a stranger.
Something was said or done that put them farther apart every day. She could not understand how any Sandal could be so absolutely out of her love and sympathy. Who has not experienced these invasions of hostile natures? Alien voices, characters fundamentally different, yet bound to them by natural ties which the soul refuses to recognize.
The somberness of her thoughts affected her surroundings very much as rain affects the atmosphere. The hills looked melancholy: she was aware of every stone on the road. Alas! this morning she had begun to grow old, for she felt that she had _a past_,--a past that could never return. Hitherto her life had been to-day and to-morrow, and to-morrow always in the sunshine. Hitherto the thought of Stephen had been blended with something that was to happen. Now she knew she must always be remembering the days that for them would come no more. She found herself reviewing even her former visits to Up-Hill. In them also change had begun. And it is over the young, sorrow triumphs most cruelly. They are so easily wounded, so inapt to resist, so hara.s.sed by scruples, so astonished at troubles they cannot comprehend, that their very sensitiveness prepares them for suffering. Very bitter tears are shed before we are twenty years old. At forty we have learned to accept the inevitable, and to feel many things possible which we once declared would break our hearts in two.
There was an air of great depression also at Up-Hill. Ducie was full of apprehension. She said to Charlotte, "When men as old as father fall, they stumble at their own grave; and I can"t think what I"ll do without father."
"You have Steve."
"Steve is going away. He would have left this morning, but for this fresh trouble. I see you are startled, Charlotte."
"I am that. I heard nothing of it. He moves in a great hurry."
"He always moves that way, does Steve."
"How is grandfather?"
"He has had quite a backening since yesterday night. He has got "the call," Charlotte. I"ve had more than one sign of it. Just before he fell he went into the garden, and brought in with him a sprig of "Death-come-quickly." [The plant _Geranium Robertianum_.] "Father," I asked, "whatever made you pull that?" Then he looked so queerly, and answered, "I didn"t pull it, Ducie: I found it on the wall." He was quite curious, and sent me to ask this one and the other one if they had been in the garden. No one had been there; and, at the long end, he said, "Make no more talk about it, Ducie. There"s _them_ that go up and down the fellside that no one sees. _They_ lift the latch, and wait not for the open door, the king"s command being urgent. I have had a message." He fell an hour afterwards, Charlotte. He did not think he was much hurt at the time, but he got his death-throw. I know it."
"I should like to speak to him, Ducie. Tell him that Charlotte Sandal wants his blessing."
He was lying on the big oak bed in the best room, waiting for his dismissal in cheerful serenity. "Come here, Charlotte," he said; "stoop down, and let me see you once more. My sight grows dim. I am going away, dear."
"O grandfather! is there any thing I can do for you?"
"Be a good girl. Be good, and do good. Stand true to Steve,--remember,--true to Steve." And he did not seem inclined to talk more.
"He is saving his strength for the squire," said Ducie. "He has a deal to say to him."
"Father hoped to be back this afternoon."
"Though it be the darkening when he gets home, ask him to come at once, Charlotte. Father is waiting for him, and I don"t think he will pa.s.s the turn of the night."
There were many subtle links of sympathy between Up-Hill and Sandal.
Death could not be in one house without casting a shadow in the other.
Julius privately thought such a fellow-feeling a little stretched. The Latriggs were on a distinctly lower social footing than the Sandals.
Rich they might be; but they were not written among the list of county families, nor had they even married into their ranks. He could not understand why Barf Latrigg"s death should be allowed to interfere with life at Seat-Sandal. Yet Mrs. Sandal was at Up-Hill all the afternoon; and, though the squire did not get home until quite the darkening, he went at once, without taking food or rest, to the dying man.
"Why, Barf is very near all the same as my own father," he said. And then, in a lower voice, "and he may see my father before the strike of day. I wouldn"t miss Barfs last words for a year of life. I wouldn"t that."
It was a lovely night,--warm, and sweet with the scent of August lilies, and the rich aromas of ripening fruit and grain. The great hills and the peaceful valleys lay under the soft radiance of a full moon; and there was not a sound but the gurgle of running water, or the bark of some solitary sheep-dog, watching the folds on the high fells. Sophia and Julius were walking in the garden, both feeling the sensitive suggestiveness of the hour, talking softly together on topics people seldom discuss in the sunshine,--intimations of lost powers, prior existences, immortal life. Julius was learned in the Oriental view of metempsychosis. Sophia could trace the veiled intuition through the highest inspiration of Western thought.
"It whispers in the heart of every shepherd on these hills," she said; "and they interpreted for Mr. Wordsworth the dream of his own soul."
"I know, Sophia. I lifted the book yesterday: your mark was in it." And he recited in a low, intense voice,--