"It"s not--it can"t be--why, Miss Mary!" She gasped and trembled. The year dropped off from her like a loosened cloak.
"Oh, Dr. Stanchon, don"t, _don"t_ tell him!" she moaned.
"Him? him?" he repeated. "Why, Miss Mary, were you here all the time?
And your hair--you were ill?"
"It used to be coloured--you never knew," she murmured. "I mean Dr.--Dr. Jarvyse."
"But you are the one Swartout described to me--the one he"s in love with? Miss Mary, it was wrong of you--I looked for months. It was cruel. And when they found the emeralds and the cross----"
"Did they find them?"
"Why, certainly--the stones were all listed, you know. Didn"t you read it in the papers?"
"I never see them," she said quietly. She had gathered herself together for what must be the struggle of her life.
"Will you tell him? I can"t go back. I"d die first!" she cried.
"But why should you go back?" he asked in amazement. "Surely you"ll let them know? They gave up hope long ago. You needn"t go back to them, if you"re happy here, of course, and indeed, I wouldn"t, Miss Mary----"
"I don"t mean go back _there_," she interrupted gently, "I mean to the--to--Dr.----"
He stared.
"You know, of course, what"s the matter," she said quietly, "but n.o.body here does. They think I"m--I"m like anybody else. I don"t mind any more, since I"ve been so busy. I haven"t had time to worry over it.
But still, I know it.--And so I told Mr. Swartout it would be impossible. It wouldn"t be right."
Stanchon seized both of her hands.
"For heaven"s sake, Miss Mary, what do you think"s the matter with you?" he cried, his voice breaking in spite of himself.
"Isn"t it so?" she queried wistfully. "Do you really mean it?--But who cured me, then?"
"If you are the wonderful person I"ve been hearing about all this time from Swartout," Stanchon said, trying to speak lightly, his grey eyes firm on her anxious brown ones, "I should say that working for your living did it, Miss Mary!"
And it may be he was right: as a diagnostician he has been widely commended.
THE CHILDREN
It all came over me, as you might say, when I began to tell the new housemaid about the work. Not that I hadn"t known before, of course, what a queer sort of life was led in that house; it was hard enough the first months, goodness knows. But then, a body can get used to anything. And there was no harm in it--I"ll swear that to my dying day! Although a lie"s a lie, any way you put it, and if all I"ve told--but I"ll let you judge for yourself.
As I say, it was when I began to break Margaret in, that it all came over me, and I looked about me, in a way of speaking, for how I should put it to her. She"d been house-parlor-maid in a big establishment in the country and knew what was expected of her well enough, and I saw from the first she"d fit in nicely with us; a steady, quiet girl, like the best of the Scotch, looking to save her wages, and get to be housekeeper herself, some day, perhaps.
But when Hodges brought the tray with the porringers on it and the silver mug, for me to see, and said, "I suppose this young lady"ll take these up, Miss Umbleby?" and when Margaret looked surprised and said, "I didn"t know there were children in the family--am I supposed to wait on them, too?"--then, as I say, it all came over me, and for the first time in five years I really saw where I stood, like.
I stared at Hodges and then at the girl, and the tray nearly went down amongst us.
"Do you mean to say you haven"t told her, Sarah?" says Hodges (and that was the first time that ever he called me by my given name).
"She"s told me nothing," Margaret answers rather short, "and if it"s invalid children or feeble-minded, I take it most unkind, Miss Umbleby, for I"ve never cared for that sort of thing, and could have had my twenty-five dollars a month this long time, if I"d wanted to go out as nurse."
"Take the tray up this time, yourself, Mr. Hodges, please," I said, "and I"ll have a little talk with Margaret," and I sat down and smoothed my black silk skirt (I always wore black silk of an afternoon) nervously enough, I"ll be bound.
The five years rolled away like yesterday--as they do now--as they do now----
I saw myself, in my mind"s eye, new to the place, and inclined to feel strange, as I always did when I made a change, though I was twenty-five and no chicken, but rather more settled than most, having had my troubles early and got over them. I"d just left my place--chambermaid and seamstress--in a big city house, and though it was September, I was looking out for the country, for I was mortal tired of the noise and late hours and excitement that I saw ahead of me. It was parties and b.a.l.l.s every night and me sitting up to undress the young ladies, for they kept no maid, like so many rich Americans, and yet some one must do for them. There was no housekeeper either, and the mistress was not very strong and we had to use our own responsibility more than I liked--for I wasn"t paid for that, do you see, and that"s what they forget in this country.
"I think I"ve got you suited at last, Sarah," the head of the office had said to me, "a nice, quiet place in the country, good pay and light work, but everything as it should be, you understand. Four in help besides the housekeeper and only one in family. Church within a mile and every other Sunday for yourself."
That was just what I wanted, and I packed my box thankfully and left New York for good, I hoped, and I got my wish, for I"ve never seen the inside of it since.
A middle-aged coachman in good, quiet country livery, met me at the little station, and though he was a still-mouthed fellow and rather reserved, I made out quite a little idea of the place on the way. The mistress, Mrs. Childress, was a young widow, deep in her mourning, so there was no company. The housekeeper was her old nurse, who had brought her up. John, who drove me, was coachman-gardener, and the cook was his wife--both Catholics. Everything went on very quiet and regular and it was hoped that the new upstairs maid wouldn"t be one for excitement and gaiety. The inside man had been valet to Mr. Childress and was much trusted and liked by the family. I could see that old John was a bit jealous in that direction.
We drove in through a black iron gate with cut stone posts and old black iron lanterns on top, and the moment we were inside the gates I began to take a fancy to the place. It wasn"t kept up like the places at home, but it was neat enough to show that things were taken thought for, and the beds of asters and dahlias and marigolds as we got near the house seemed so home-like and bright to me, I could have cried for comfort. Childerstone was the name of the place; it was carved on a big boulder by the side of the entrance, and just as we drove up to the door John stopped to pick some dahlias for the house (being only me in the wagon) and I took my first good look at my home for twenty years afterward.
There was something about it that went to my heart. It was built of grey cut stone in good-sized blocks, square, with two windows each side the hall door. To some it might have seemed cold-looking, but not to me, for one side was all over ivy, and the thickness of the walls and the deep sills looked solid and comfortable after those nasty brown-stone things all glued to each other in the city. It looked old and respectable and settled, like, and the sun, just at going down, struck the windows like fire and the clean panes shone. There was that yellow light over everything and that stillness, with now and then a leaf or so dropping quietly down, that makes the fall of the year so pleasant, to my mind.
The house stood in beeches and the trunks of them were grey like the house and the leaves all light lemon-coloured, like the sky, and that"s the way I always think of Childerstone--grey and yellow and clean and still. Just a few rooks (you call them crows here), went over the house, and except for their cry as they flew, there wasn"t a sound about the place. I can see how others might have found it sad, but it never seemed so to me.
John set me down at the servants" entrance and there, before ever I"d got properly into the hall, the strangeness began. The cook in her check ap.r.o.n was kneeling on the floor in front of the big French range with the tears streaming down her face, working over her rosary beads and gabbling to drive you crazy. Over her stood a youngish but severe-appearing man in a white linen coat like a ship"s steward, trying to get her up.
"Come, Katey," he was saying, "come, woman, up with you and help--she"ll do no harm, the poor soul! Look after her, now, and I"ll send for the doctor and see to madam--it"s only a fit, most like!"
Then he saw me and ran forward to give a hand to my box.
"You"re the chambermaid, Miss, I"m sure," he said. "I"m sorry to say you"ll find us a bit upset. The housekeeper"s down with a stroke of some sort and the madam"s none too strong herself. Are you much of a hand to look after the sick?"
"I"m not so clumsy as some," I said. "Let me see her," and so we left the cook to her prayers and he carried my box to my room.
I got into a print dress and ap.r.o.n and went to the housekeeper"s room.
She was an elderly person and it looked to me as if she was in her last sickness. She didn"t know any one and so I was as good as another, and I had her tidy and comfortable in bed by the time the doctor came. He said she would need watching through the night and left some medicine, but I could see he had little hope for her. I made up a bed in the room and all that night she chattered and muttered and took me for different ones, according as her fever went and came. Towards morning she got quiet, and as I thought, sensible again.
"Are you a nurse?" she says to me.
"Yes, Mrs. Shipman, be still and rest," I told her, to soothe her.
"I"m glad the children are sent away," she went on, after a bit.
""Twould break their mother"s heart if they got the fever. Are the toys packed?"
"Yes, yes," I answered, "all packed and sent."
"Be sure there"s enough frocks for Master Robertson," she begged me.
"He"s so hard on them and his aunties are so particular. And my baby must have her woolly rabbit at night or her darling heart will be just broken!"
"The rabbit is packed," I said, "and I saw to the frocks myself."