"Because I am afraid," I answered. "Because... O G.o.d! Giuliana, do you not see?" And I sank my head into my hands.
Steps shuffled along the corridor. I looked up sharply. She set a finger to her lips. There fell a knock, and old Busio stood before us.
"Madonna," he announced, "my Lord the Cardinal-legate is below and asks for you."
I started up as if I had been stung. So! At this hour! Then Messer Fifanti"s suspicions did not entirely lack for grounds.
Giuliana flashed me a glance ere she made answer.
"You will tell my Lord Gambara that I have retired for the night and that... But stay!" She caught up a quill and dipped it in the ink-horn, drew paper to herself, and swiftly wrote three lines; then dusted it with sand, and proffered that brief epistle to the servant.
"Give this to my lord."
Busio took the note, bowed, and departed.
After the door had closed a silence followed, in which I paced the room in long strides, aflame now with the all-consuming fire of jealousy.
I do believe that Satan had set all the legions of h.e.l.l to achieve my overthrow that night. Naught more had been needed to undo me than this spur of jealousy. It brought me now to her side. I stood over her, looking down at her between tenderness and fierceness, she returning my glance with such a look as may haunt the eyes of sacrificial victims.
"Why dared he come?" I asked.
"Perhaps... perhaps some affair connected with Astorre..." she faltered.
I sneered. "That would be natural seeing that he has sent Astorre to Parma."
"If there was aught else, I am no party to it," she a.s.sured me.
How could I do other than believe her? How could I gauge the turpitude of that beauty"s mind--I, all unversed in the wiles that Satan teaches women? How could I have guessed that when she saw Fifanti speak to that lad at the gate that afternoon she had feared that he had set a spy upon the house, and that fearing this she had bidden the Cardinal begone? I knew it later. But not then.
"Will you swear that it is as you say?" I asked her, white with pa.s.sion.
As I have said, I was standing over her and very close. Her answer now was suddenly to rise. Like a snake came she gliding upwards into my arms until she lay against my breast, her face upturned, her eyes languidly veiled, her lips a-pout.
"Can you do me so great a wrong, thinking you love me, knowing that I love you?" she asked me.
For an instant we swayed together in that sweetly hideous embrace. I was as a man sapped of all strength by some portentous struggle. I trembled from head to foot. I cried out once--a despairing prayer for help, I think it was--and then I seemed to plunge headlong down through an immensity of s.p.a.ce until my lips found hers. The ecstasy, the living fire, the anguish, and the torture of it have left their indelible scars upon my memory. Even as I write the cruelly sweet poignancy of that moment is with me again--though very hateful now.
Thus I, blindly and recklessly, under the sway and thrall of that terrific and overpowering temptation. And then there leapt in my mind a glimmer of returning consciousness: a glimmer that grew rapidly to be a blazing light in which I saw revealed the hideousness of the thing I did. I tore myself away from her in that second of revulsion and hurled her from me, fiercely and violently, so that, staggering to the seat from which she had risen, she fell into it rather than sat down.
And whilst, breathless with parted lips and galloping bosom, she observed me, something near akin to terror in her eyes, I stamped about that room and raved and heaped abuse and recriminations upon myself, ending by going down upon my knees to her, imploring her forgiveness for the thing I had done--believing like a fatuous fool that it was all my doing--and imploring her still more pa.s.sionately to leave me and to go.
She set a trembling hand upon my head; she took my chin in the other, and raised my face until she could look into it.
"If it be your will--if it will bring you peace and happiness, I will leave you now and never see you more. But are you not deluded, my Agostino?"
And then, as if her self-control gave way, she fell to weeping.
"And what of me if you go? What of me wedded to that monster, to that cruel and inhuman pedant who tortures and insults me as you have seen?"
"Beloved, will another wrong cure the wrong of that?" I pleaded. "O, if you love me, go--go, leave me. It is too late--too late!"
I drew away from her touch, and crossed the room to fling myself upon the window-seat. For a s.p.a.ce we sat apart thus, panting like wrestlers who have flung away from each other. At length--"Listen, Giuliana," I said more calmly. "Were I to heed you, were I to obey my own desires, I should bid you come away with me from this to-morrow."
"If you but would!" she sighed. "You would be taking me out of h.e.l.l."
"Into another worse," I countered swiftly. "I should do you such a wrong as naught could ever right again."
She looked at me for a spell in silence. Her back was to the light and her face in shadow, so that I could not read what pa.s.sed there. Then, very slowly, like one utterly weary, she got to her feet.
"I will do your will, beloved; but I do it not for the wrong that I should suffer--for that I should count no wrong--but for the wrong that I should be doing you."
She paused as if for an answer. I had none for her. I raised my arms, then let them fall again, and bowed my head. I heard the gentle rustle of her robe, and I looked up to see her staggering towards the door, her arms in front of her like one who is blind. She reached it, pulled it open, and from the threshold gave me one last ineffable look of her great eyes, heavy now with tears. Then the door closed again, and I was alone.
From my heart there rose a great surge of thankfulness. I fell upon my knees and prayed. For an hour at least I must have knelt there, seeking grace and strength; and comforted at last, my calm restored, I rose, and went to the window. I drew back the curtains, and leaned out to breathe the physical calm of that tepid September night.
And presently out of the gloom a great grey shape came winging towards the window, the heavy pinions moving ponderously with their uncanny sough. It was an owl attracted by the light. Before that bird of evil omen, that harbinger of death, I drew back and crossed myself. I had a sight of its sphinx-like face and round, impa.s.sive eyes ere it circled to melt again into the darkness, startled by any sudden movement. I closed the window and left the room.
Very softly I crept down the pa.s.sage towards my chamber, leaving the light burning in the library, for it was not my habit to extinguish it, and I gave no thought to the lateness of the hour.
Midway down the pa.s.sage I halted. I was level with Giuliana"s door, and from under it there came a slender blade of light. But it was not this that checked me. She was singing, Such a pitiful little heartbroken song it was:
"Amor mi muojo; mi muojo amore mio!"
ran its last line.
I leaned against the wall, and a sob broke from me. Then, in an instant, the pa.s.sage was flooded with light, and in the open doorway Giuliana stood all white before me, her arms held out.
CHAPTER VI. THE IRON GIRDLE
From the distance, drawing rapidly nearer and ringing sharply in the stillness of the night, came the clatter of a mule"s hooves.
But, though heard, it was scarcely heard consciously, and it certainly went unheeded until it was beneath the window and ceasing at the door.
Giuliana"s fingers locked themselves upon my arm in a grip of fear.
"Who comes?" she asked, below her breath, fearfully. I sprang from the bed and crouched, listening, by the window, and so lost precious time.
Out of the darkness Giuliana"s voice spoke again, hoa.r.s.ely now and trembling.
"It will be Astorre," she said, with conviction. "At this hour it can be none else. I suspected when I saw him talking to that boy at the gate this afternoon that he was setting a spy upon me, to warn him wherever he was lurking, did the need arise."
"But how should the boy know...?" I began, when she interrupted me almost impatiently.
"The boy saw Messer Gambara ride up. He waited for no more, but went at once to warn Astorre. He has been long in coming," she added in the tone of one who is still searching for the exact explanation of the thing that is happening. And then, suddenly and very urgently, "Go, go--go quickly!" she bade me.