But upon that command of hers I leapt of a sudden to my feet, a tightening about my heart, and beset by a certain breathlessness that turned me pale.
Here again, it seemed, was to be repeated--though with methods a thousand times more barbarous and harsh--the wrong that was done years ago in the case of poor Gino Falcone. And the reason for it in this instance was not even dimly apparent to me. Falcone I had loved; indeed, in my eighteen years of life he was the only human being who had knocked for admission upon the portals of my heart. Him they had driven forth.
And now, here was a child--the fairest creature of G.o.d"s that until that hour I had beheld, whose companionship seemed to me a thing sweet and desirable, and whom I felt that I might love as I had loved Falcone.
Her too they would drive forth, and with a brutality and cruelty that revolted me.
Later I was to perceive the reasons better, and much food for reflection was I to derive from realizing that there are no spirits so vengeful, so fierce, so utterly intolerant, ungovernable, and feral as the spirits of the devout when they conceive themselves justified to anger.
All the sweet teaching of Charity and brotherly love and patience is jettisoned, and by the most amazing paradox that Christianity has ever known, Catholic burns heretic, and heretic butchers Catholic, all for the love of Christ; and each glories devoutly in the deed, never heeding the blasphemy of his belief that thus he obeys the sweet and gentle mandates of the G.o.d Incarnate.
Thus, then, my mother now, commanding that hideous deed with a mind at peace in pharisaic self-righteousness.
But not again would I stand by as I had stood by in the case of Falcone, and let her cruel, pietistic will be done. I had grown since then, and I had ripened more than I was aware. It remained for this moment to reveal to me the extent. Besides, the subtle influence of s.e.x--all unconscious of it as I was--stirred me now to prove my new-found manhood.
"Stay!" I said to Giojoso, and in uttering the command I grew very cold and steady, and my breathing resumed the normal.
He checked in the act of turning away to do my mother"s hideous bidding.
"You will give Madonna"s order to the grooms, Ser Giojoso, as you have been bidden. But you will add from me that if there is one amongst them dares to obey it and to lay be it so much as a finger upon Luisina, him will I kill with these two hands."
Never was consternation more profound than that which I flung amongst them by those words. Giojoso fell to trembling; behind him, Rinolfo, the cause of all this garboil, stared with round big eyes; whilst my mother, all a-quiver, clutched at her bosom and looked at me fearfully, but spoke no word.
I smiled upon them, towering there, conscious and glad of my height for the first time in my life.
"Well?" I demanded of Giojoso. "For what do you wait? About it, sir, and do as my mother has commanded you."
He turned to her, all bent and grovelling, arms outstretched in ludicrous bewilderment, every line of him beseeching guidance along this path so suddenly grown th.o.r.n.y.
"Ma--madonna!" he stammered.
She swallowed hard, and spoke at last.
"Do you defy my will, Agostino?"
"On the contrary, madam mother, I am enforcing it. Your will shall be done; your order shall be given. I insist upon it. But it shall lie with the discretion of the grooms whether they obey you. Am I to blame if they turn cowards?"
O, I had found myself at last, and I was making a furious, joyous use of the discovery.
"That... that were to make a mock of me and my authority," she protested.
She was still rather helpless, rather breathless and confused, like one who has suddenly been hurled into cold water.
"If you fear that, madam, perhaps you had better countermand your order."
"Is the girl to remain in Mondolfo against my wishes? Are you so... so lost to shame?" A returning note of warmth in her accents warned me that she was collecting herself to deal with the situation.
"Nay," said I, and I looked at Luisina, who stood there so pale and tearful. "I think that for her own sake, poor maid, it were better that she went, since you desire it. But she shall not be whipped hence like a stray dog."
"Come, child," I said to her, as gently as I could. "Go pack, and quit this home of misery. And be easy. For if any man in Mondolfo attempts to hasten your going, he shall reckon with me."
I laid a hand for an instant in kindliness and friendliness upon her shoulder. "Poor little Luisina," said I, sighing. But she shrank and trembled under my touch. "Pity me a little, for they will not permit me any friends, and who is friendless is indeed pitiful."
And then, whether the phrase touched her, so that her simple little nature was roused and she shook off what self-control she had ever learnt, or whether she felt secure enough in my protection to dare proclaim her mind before them all, she caught my hand, and, stooping, kissed it.
"O Madonnino!" she faltered, and her tears showered upon that hand of mine. "G.o.d reward you your sweet thought for me. I shall pray for you, Madonnino."
"Do, Luisina," said I. "I begin to think I need it."
"Indeed, indeed!" said my mother very sombrely. And as she spoke, Luisina, as if her fears were reawakened, turned suddenly and went quickly along the terrace, past Rinolfo, who in that moment smiled viciously, and round the angle of the wall.
"What... what are my orders, Madonna?" quoth the wretched seneschal, reminding her that all had not yet been resolved.
She lowered her eyes to the ground, and folded her hands. She was by now quite composed again, her habitual sorrowful self.
"Let be," she said. "Let the wench depart. So that she goes we may count ourselves fortunate."
"Fortunate, I think, is she," said I. "Fortunate to return to the world beyond all this--the world of life and love that G.o.d made and that St.
Francis praises. I do not think he would have praised Mondolfo, for I greatly doubt that G.o.d had a hand in making it as it is to-day. It is too... too arid."
O, my mood was finely rebellious that May morning.
"Are you mad, Agostino?" gasped my mother.
"I think that I am growing sane," said I very sadly. She flashed me one of her rare glances, and I saw her lips tighten.
"We must talk," she said. "That girl..." And then she checked. "Come with me," she bade me.
But in that moment I remembered something, and I turned aside to look for my friend Rinolfo. He was moving stealthily away, following the road Luisina had taken. The conviction that he went to plague and jeer at her, to exult over her expulsion from Mondolfo, kindled my anger all anew.
"Stay! You there! Rinolfo!" I called.
He halted in his strides, and looked over his shoulder, impudently.
I had never yet been paid by any the deference that was my due. Indeed, I think that among the grooms and serving-men at Mondolfo I must have been held in a certain measure of contempt, as one who would never come to more manhood than that of the ca.s.sock.
"Come here," I bade him, and as he appeared to hesitate I had to repeat the order more peremptorily. At last he turned and came.
"What now, Agostino?" cried my mother, setting a pale hand upon my sleeve
But I was all intent upon that lout, who stood there before me shifting uneasily upon his feet, his air mutinous and sullen. Over his shoulder I had a glimpse of his father"s yellow face, wide-eyed with alarm.
"I think you smiled just now," said I.
"Heh! By Bacchus!" said he impudently, as who would say: "How could I help smiling?"
"Will you tell me why you smiled?" I asked him.
"Heh! By Bacchus!" said he again, and shrugged to give his insolence a barb.
"Will you answer me?" I roared, and under my display of anger he looked truculent, and thus exhausted the last remnant of my patience.