V2 Chapter 11: Uncontrollable Emotions (Part 2)Jiang Muqing looked at my awkward state, seeming to know exactly what I was going to do.
“I’m not…. Ready yet, can we do this another time?”
I immediately froze.
“Do you still love me?”
As soon as I tried to reject, the girl’s smile started to petrify. She neared me with her lips tightly pressed, closely observing my face.
“I’ve been loving you all along….”
“Then today, let’s bring our relationship to the next step, Fan.”
The girl walked into the bathroom to take a shower, leaving me sitting uncomfortably on the living room sofa.
I turned on the TV.
The current channel was playing a Chinese war film. Booming sounds of cannons and the sounds of j.a.panese soldiers’ screams hollered from the speakers. *
*China is still not too far away from the time when it was being f.u.c.ked by European superpowers from all sides and slapped around by j.a.pan. Although China is now very technologically and economically advanced as compared to before, the Communist Party is still in power, and propaganda is still a very real issue. To think that in the 21st century, children at elementary school age are taught lessons with stories of Chinese war heroes slaughtering the “filthy” j.a.panese, and shown b.l.o.o.d.y propaganda videos made by the government (hey, I was shown a good couple myself, everyone had to). In fact, people still call the j.a.panese and Europeans “devils”; “日本鬼子” (j.a.panese devils) and “洋鬼子” “European devils.” Since China does not have such a diverse population like America, it’s so incredibly easy for the government to manipulate them into thinking whatever they want about foreigners. Their capitalist economy is quickly dragging the Chinese out of this mentality, however. As proven since the dawn of humanity, money always wins over and succeeds religion, culture, and propaganda.
I picked up the remote and set the volume very high to drown out the sounds of Jiang Muqing showering.
But even if I set it to the highest, my ears still would ignore the cries and gunshots, and seek the gentle splashes coming from the bathroom.
I wanted to just straight up slap myself. Even though my heart knew that the whole matter was completely wrong, my body was stuck in a state of high expectations and mindless excitement.
s.h.i.t, if this continues on, I really won’t be able to control myself. I have to leave this wretched limbo; maybe I’ll go to the community center outside, and chat idly with the elderly….
I turned off the TV, and headed out the door. But as soon as I turned the k.n.o.b….
“Fan, why are you heading out.”
The splashing of water from the shower stopped.
“I’m going to get some air…. It’s too stuffy indoors.”
I uttered in the bathroom’s direction.
“Fan, you’re going to tell me that you’re going to get some air at a time like this?!”
The bathroom door opened fully, and Jiang Muqing was only wearing a single white towel. The cloth wrapped around her youthful body; her elegant curves and steaming, exposed skin would make anyone’s head rush with blood.
She walked to me with a dark expression. Her soaked, plastic slippers seemed out of place.
“Fan, we’re in a relationship, aren’t we?” She lifted her head, and asked.
“Theoretically, yes.” I started to back away.
“Then what about realistically? I don’t feel Lu Fan’s love at all!” The girl’s emotions were taking a free fall.
“I….”
“Lu Fan should be all mine, I can’t take this ‘so close, but so far’ distance anymore. I love Lu Fan, I need to have him as a whole!”
She exploded with all of her bottled up emotions.
“I do love you, but I….”
I had nothing to back myself up.
“Then prove it to me, Lu Fan, show me if you’re a man or not!”
Her voice was menacing and dominating.
“I….”
My eyes widened, and my legs could only back away.
She stared at me dead in the eyes, and started to smile strangely.
“There’s fear in Lu Fan’s eyes…. I must have scared Lu Fan…. Lu Fan must hate me now…. Lu Fan must have stayed with me because I was threatening him, I’m such a bad girl…. It’s all my fault….” She spluttered.
“It’s not like that, Jiang Muqing….”
I wanted to explain, but I couldn’t think of anything to say.
It looks like she’s long since seen through my disguise.
“This starving, hungry mood is really disgusting…. Lu Fan must prefer more restrained girls, but I can’t fake my emotions anymore, I just want to love Lu Fan, and understand Lu Fan more than others.” She looked at her nakedness, and laughed bitterly.
“No, I’ve never thought that way before.”
“Lu Fan, you’ve been lying to me all along, even that kiss was a lie. What a joke, I actually believed it at that moment, I’m such a foolish woman.”
“It’s not like that, definitely not.”
I was a total mess.
In the time Jiang Muqing has lived in our house, she seemed to have become so normal. I thought that through slowing guiding her, she would become a lot better. But since Mom wasn’t home today, she showed her true self. It seems that her condition has become worse through emotional constraint.
I haven’t noticed at all….
“Lu Fan, do you have erectile dysfunction?” She roared.
“How is that possible?!”
“Are you s.e.xually apathetic?!”
“No!”
“If you even still love me a little bit, will you please give me some hope? I’ve been trying for a long time, and I’m really tired of it.”
She curled up, leaned against the pale walls, and seemed to scream from her core.
Well, it looks like that I’ve really been forced into a corner by Jiang Muqing….
To think that a woman would question a man’s dignity down there. She’s touched my absolute, innermost red line.
“Jiang Muqing! You want hope, don’t you? Tonight, I’ll make you eat those words.”
Under her pressure, I also became insane.
Who cares about some s.h.i.tty laws, today I’ll give you a glimpse of what a man’s been gathering up for all of his sixteen years.
I lunged forward, lifted her slender body with both hands, and carried her to my bedroom, where I flung her onto the bed.