"That"s the fact, isn"t it?" she laughed.
"No."
His wife"s head dropped on the table. She was crying now.
"I"ve made a hard fight, Howard," she sobbed, "but I"m going to give up.
I"m through--I"m through!"
Howard took hold of her hand and carried it to his lips.
"Annie, old girl," he said with some feeling, "I may be weak, I may be blind, but n.o.body on top of G.o.d"s green earth can tell me that you"re not the squarest, straightest little woman that ever lived! I don"t care a d.a.m.n what one million or eighty million think. Supposing you had received letters from Underwood, supposing you had gone to his rooms to beg him not to kill himself--what of it? It would be for a good motive, wouldn"t it? Let them talk all the bad of you they want. I don"t believe a word of it--you know I don"t."
She looked up and smiled through her tears.
"You"re so good, dear," she exclaimed. "Yes, I know you believe in me."
She stopped and continued sadly: "But you"re only a boy, you know. What of the future, the years to come?" Howard"s face became serious, and she went on: "You see you"ve thought about it, too, and you"re trying to hide it from me. But you can"t. Your father wants you to go abroad with the family."
"Well?"
He waited and looked at her curiously as if wondering what her answer would be. He waited some time, and then slowly she said:
"I think--you had better go!"
"You don"t mean that!" he exclaimed, in genuine surprise.
She shook her head affirmatively.
"Yes, I do," she said; "your father wants you to take your position in the world, the position you are ent.i.tled to, the position your a.s.sociation with me prevents you from taking----"
Howard drummed his fingers on the tablecloth and looked out of the window. It seemed to her that his voice no longer had the same candid ring as he replied:
"Yes, father has spoken to me about it. He wants to be friends, and I----" He paused awkwardly, and then added: "I admit I"ve--I"ve promised to consider it, but----"
Annie finished his sentence for him:
"You"re going to accept his offer, Howard. You owe it to yourself, to your family, and to----" She laughed as she added: "I was going to say to a million anxious readers."
Howard looked at her curiously. He did not know if she were jesting or in earnest. Almost impatiently he exclaimed:
"Why do you talk in this way against your own interests? You know I"d like to be friendly with my family, and all that. But it wouldn"t be fair to you."
"I"m not talking against myself, Howard. I want you to be happy, and you"re not happy. You can"t be happy under these conditions. Now be honest with me--can you?"
"Can you?" he demanded.
"No," she answered frankly, "not unless you are." Slowly, she went on: "Whatever happiness I"ve had in life I owe to you, and G.o.d knows you"ve had nothing but trouble from me. I did wrong to marry you, and I"m willing to pay the penalty. I"ve evened matters up with your family; now let me try and square up with you."
"Evened up matters with my family?" he exclaimed in surprise. "What do you mean?"
With a smile she replied ambiguously:
"Oh, that"s a little private matter of my own!" He stared at her, unable to comprehend, and she went on gravely: "Howard, you must do what"s best for yourself. I"ll pack your things. You can go when you please----"
He stared gloomily out of the window without replying. After all, he thought to himself, it was perhaps for the best. Shackled as he was now, he would never be able to accomplish anything. If they separated, his father would take him at once into his business. Life would begin for him all over again. It would be better for her, too. Of course, he would never forget her. He would provide for her comfort. His father would help him arrange for that. Lighting a cigarette, he said carelessly:
"Well--perhaps you"re right. Maybe a little trip through Europe won"t do me any harm."
"Of course not," she said simply.
Busy with an obstinate match, he did not hear the sigh that accompanied her words or see the look of agony that crossed her face.
"But what are you going to do?" he inquired after a silence.
With an effort, she controlled her voice. Not for all the world would she betray the fact that her heart was breaking. With affected indifference, she replied:
"Oh, I shall be all right. I shall go and live somewhere in the country for a few months. I"m tired of the city."
"So am I," he rejoined, with a gesture of disgust. "But I hate like the deuce to leave you alone."
"That"s nothing," she said hastily. "A trip abroad is just what you need." Looking up at him, she added: "Your face has brightened up already!"
He stared at her, unable to understand.
"I wish you could go with me."
She smiled.
"Your father"s society doesn"t make quite such an appeal to me as it does to you." Carelessly, she added: "Where are you going--Paris or London?"
He sent a thick cloud of smoke curling to the ceiling. A European trip was something he had long looked forward to.
"London--Vienna--Paris," he replied gayly. With a laugh, he went on: "No, I think I"ll cut out Paris. I"m a married man. I mustn"t forget that!"
Annie looked up at him quickly.
"You"ve forgotten it already," she said quietly. There was reproach in her voice as she continued: "Ah, Howard, you"re such a boy! A little pleasure trip and the past is forgotten!"
A look of perplexity came over his face. Being only a man, he did not grasp quickly the finer shades of her meaning. With some irritation, he demanded:
"Didn"t you say you wanted me to go and forget?"
She nodded.
"Yes, I do, Howard. You"ve made me happy. I want you to be happy."
He looked puzzled.
"You say you love me?" he said, "and yet you"re happy because I"m going away. I don"t follow that line of reasoning."