Griffith was dressed in mourning grey today, with a face to match; his eyes were so barren that it seemed his spirit had accompanied his father"s to the Land Beyond. When he began talking, though, he was quite calm. He said that he had no wish to take the feud any farther than it had already gone, and that he was willing to concede victory to Mountside. He would compensate Richard for the damage to his cart when it ran over Tabitha"s rooster, and he would pay Mountside whatever fee it liked as blood-payment for the Cold Run man who would have died if the feud had ended in the normal way, with a hunter being caught and killed.
My father"s answer was short. "Give me Hamar"s murderer," he said, "and I will consider the matter ended."
We were all crowded into the sanctuary, there being as yet no village hall in which the council can meet. I could see Drew peeking in through the half-opened window, and the women"s voices murmured outside. Some of the younger men had had a hard time restraining their laughter during Griffith"s speech. Now they stared at my father, amazed that he would ask so small a victory price when it was clear that Cold Run"s new baron was spineless.
I was standing next to my father and could hear Fenton murmuring in his ear, urging a peace oath, regardless of Griffith"s answer. My father ignored him; he was staring with dark eyes at Griffith, whose spine appeared quite firm to me, and whose dagger-hand was twitching in a manner I did not like. I was glad that Griffith had vowed a truce oath and would not draw the blade at his side.
When he spoke, though, it was in the same mild voice as before. "Hamar"s murderer has already received his punishment from our priest. If you wish his blood in payment for your son"s death, I stand in his stead."
This time there was no laughter, only a collective intake of breath. Faintly through the window, I could hear Drew whispering the news to the other children, and soon after a gasp arose from the women outside. Felix was staring at Griffith as though he had gone mad.
My father is too well-bred to show his contempt for weaklings, but I thought his face shimmered with a smile for a moment before it grew grave again. He said, in a voice raised so that the women outside could hear, "My son, dying from the fire, demanded vengeance upon his killer. The G.o.ds were witness to that cry, and I would be lacking in my duty to the G.o.ds if I allowed their vengeance to go unfulfilled. I will accept no subst.i.tute for the murderer"s blood."
Fenton began to say something, then stopped, having caught sight of Griffith"s face. I wondered, then, whether Griffith himself was Hamar"s murderer, for he looked at that moment like the sort of man who would willingly burn flesh. He said, slowly and precisely, "Then let the G.o.ds judge between us. They alone know which of us deserves their vengeance." And he turned and walked out of the sanctuary, with Felix trailing behind, looking as proud as a mountain cat when her cub makes its first kill.
So tonight the men are whetting their blades in preparation for the next hunt. Lange, who is always gentle with Drew, lectured his son sternly when Drew touched Lange"s blade.
Fenton and my father have been locked together in the sanctuary all day. I heard my father shouting.
The twenty-first day of September in the 940th year a.g.l.
Everyone was relieved yesterday when my father emerged from the sanctuary with his mind unchanged. I heard some boys saying today that Fenton has forgotten to worship the G.o.d of vengeance; by the time I was through with them, I was sure that I had proved I was no coward. When I told Fenton afterwards how I had defended him, though, he said that a fist is no better than a blade. I felt ashamed of myself and begged his pardon for breaking my promise to him.
He smiled then and said, "Men are called to different paths in life, and your father is wrong in thinking that I am training you to be a priest. I hold no doubt that, in future years, you will unsheathe your blade and defend others who are in need, and that the G.o.ds will honor your bloodshed as much as they honor my bladelessness. I want to be sure, though, that when you shed blood, you are following the G.o.ds" will, not your own."
This came so close to our previous conversation about the law that I"m sorry to say that I asked leave to skip our lesson that day. I left Fenton alone in the sanctuary, polishing the curved blade he uses during his daily sacrifices.
I remembered then that Fenton has shed more blood than any other man in our village, and I grew angry at my father for not remembering this. But when I arrived at my parents" sleeping hut, I had no opportunity to speak with my father, for my mother was weeping and my father was shouting.
I quickly climbed the ladder to the loft where Mira sleeps, before my parents could notice me, and then I listened to their conversation. "Thank the G.o.ds that Emlyn lives in the south," my mother was saying between sobs. "If he still lived in Cold Run, I"ve no doubt that you would have killed your nephew with your own blade if you had the opportunity."
"Emlyn is no kinsman of ours!" shouted my father. "Nor has he been since the feud began. Blood feuds break ties of kinship a you know that, for I would never have married you if I thought that you understood otherwise."
My mother drew breath to answer, but my father bellowed over her words, "You are a woman of Mountside a have you forgotten that? Or do you hold your birth-blood more dear than the blood I gave to you when we exchanged our marriage vows?"
"Never," my mother choked out. I could see her through the cracks in the floorboard, and I saw that her face-cloth was moist with tears. "I am yours always; the G.o.ds are witness to that. Why must this feud continue, though? Griffith has offered an honorable peace-"
"Honorable?" cried my father. "Honorable to allow the death of our first-born son to remain unavenged? Those are words I might hear from any weak-minded woman in the village. Those are words I might hear from our priest, who will never know what it is like to lose a son. May the G.o.ds watch over me, those are even words I might hear from my heir, who has turned into something halfway between a priest and a woman. Those are not words I expected to hear from the woman I picked to be my wife."
I heard no more; I picked up a cushion from Mira"s bed and buried my head under it, afraid of hearing more about myself, and even more afraid of believing what my father said of me.
I went to see Fenton later, but Drew said he had gone out onto the mountain, and he had not returned when it was time for me to go to bed.
The twenty-second day of September in the 940th year a.g.l.
Today was the worst day since the feud began. No one died a we are still observing the period of mourning a but my father and I fought.
I have no need to record what he said about me; it is burned into my spirit. I will record here, though, what I said in the end, as a sort of penance, for it is painful to recall my shamelessness. I said, "You are just like the men Fenton talked about, who are evil in their hearts, and who pretend that the G.o.ds want what they want."
My father said nothing after that, which frightened me more than if he had shouted. He has commanded me to stay in this hut until dinnertime, when he will allow me to join the villagers around the fire we are building to match the fire built in Cold Run tonight for Roderick"s body.
I almost wish that I had taken part in the feud after all. Perhaps I would be dead by now and would not feel this pain at what I have done.
The men had built the funeral pyre by the time Fenton arrived tonight, and the women were throwing onto it the mourning cloths that were meant to represent Roderick"s body. As I saw Fenton"s face, pale over the bright flames, I had a sudden image of Fenton himself burning in the fire, dying the death of the G.o.d-cursed, but I quickly thrust this thought away. The G.o.ds love Fenton; of that I can be sure.
He was very quiet tonight, saying the words in honor of Roderick"s life. His gaze strayed a couple of times to my father, who kept a seemly silence throughout the rite. As soon as Fenton was finished, though, my father roared for wine, and soon all of us were sitting around the fire, warming ourselves as the first touch of autumn coolness travelled over the mountains from Emor.
I had hoped to be able to spend time talking to Fenton, but he was busy offering comfort to Chloris, who used this mock funeral pyre as an opportunity to reopen her grief for her dead husband. When he had succeeded in persuading Chloris to put aside her open grief, he began to walk toward my father, but he stopped as my father shouted for silence.
Licked by the light of the flames, my father stood with cup in hand, looking round at the people about him, like a father regarding his beloved children. His gaze rested finally on me, sitting between Mira and Drew. Then he raised his hand and said, "Eleven years ago last spring, we welcomed a new kinsman into our midst."
I knew immediately what my father was going to say next, and I looked over at Fenton. His lips were parted with surprise at this honor, and I saw a blush start across his cheeks. Then he ducked his head and went over to help one of my aunts collect the empty wine flasks.
"Eleven years ago," my father continued, "we met a stranger, an Emorian who had chosen to leave his old life and to brave danger in order to enter this land. He was called to Koretia by a voice, he told me, and he soon came to believe that the voice he had heard was that of his G.o.d. Wishing to serve his G.o.d with the same loyalty with which he had served his previous master, he took on the robes of priesthood and dedicated his manhood to the seven G.o.ds and G.o.ddesses of Koretia. Since that time he has borne no blade, except when serving as the G.o.d"s representative at the sacrifice."
All around me, I could see people nodding. Even those who were angry at Fenton for wishing an early peace with Cold Run knew that he had acted as he did out of love of the G.o.ds. Fenton himself, still busily collecting flasks, looked as flushed as a boy in love.
"Because he had shown himself to be a G.o.d-lover, I asked Fenton to share blood with me," my father said. "Because he had shown himself to be a G.o.d-lover, I entrusted to his care my younger son, who has now become my heir. It is because of Fenton that my son is what he is today."
He turned and handed his flask to Lange, who had been nodding with the others; then he unsheathed his dagger. A small sigh drifted through the crowd like mist.
I was as impressed as the rest. I had expected my father only to offer a toast to Fenton, as a sign that this disagreement was superficial in comparison to their blood-bond and their love for each other. Now I realized that my father was going to go further and renew his blood vow of friendship with Fenton.
Fenton had raised his head. I saw his lips part again, and then he quietly took a step forward, awaiting the moment when my father would hand the blade to him. My father raised the underside of his arm so that all could see the thin slit of whiteness upon his wrist. He pointed to it with the tip of his dagger, and then carefully, precisely, he cut his wrist cross-wise from the original mark.
No one spoke. All eyes were now on Fenton, who looked like a corpse that had been drained of blood. My father, it was clear, had not told him what he planned.
"As the Jackal is my witness," said my father in a cool and level voice, "I hereby abjure my vow of friendship with Fenton son of Paulin. No longer is his blood mine; no longer will I protect him from harm. He has broken his vow of friendship to me by teaching my son G.o.dless ways and has brought danger to him through those teachings."
Now a murmur ran through the crowd, like wind running over gra.s.s. Everyone"s gaze turned toward me, including my father"s. For a moment more, as my spirit screamed from fear of what he would say next, my father looked upon me. Then he said quietly, "Fenton remains blood-bound to my son; I will not say anything that would cause harm to my son"s blood brother. For this reason, I will not repeat the teachings I have heard Fenton speak. Nor will I ask him to leave this village; he remains kin to us through my son. I have sent a letter to the King, though, asking him to send a new priest to us. When that priest arrives, Fenton may leave or stay, as he wishes. If he stays, I will not ask him to take part in the blood feud, for his vow to the G.o.ds forbids that. No longer, though, will he represent us before the G.o.ds. I believe that, if he were to remain as our priest, our village would be in danger of the G.o.ds" anger. That is all I wish to say." And wiping his blade clean on his sleeve, he sheathed his dagger and turned to Lange for his flask.
I looked over toward Fenton, but he was gone already, and when I ran to the sanctuary, the doors were locked.
CHAPTER FOUR.
The twenty-third day of September in the 940th year a.g.l.
I have been to the sanctuary five times today, but each time I have found the doors locked, and I dare not knock on the doors, for I have heard Fenton"s voice murmuring prayers. I have been to see my father as well, and he listened to all that I had to say, but in the end he said nothing more than that, having been tutored by Fenton, I could not be expected to understand how Fenton had turned his face from the G.o.ds. The best I could do for Fenton, my father said, was to pray that the G.o.ds would show mercy toward him.
He also said that the greatest blame lay with himself, for allowing me to be tutored by an Emorian, but when he said that I left the hut, fearing that my anger would overcome me. How can my father not see that Fenton is a man loved by the G.o.ds, full of mercy and peace and goodness? It does not matter that Fenton was born in Emor. Even the blindest man ought to see that Fenton"s a man of honor despite that.
But I have already brought about too much trouble by failing to show respect to my father. I am praying to the Jackal to solve the problems I have caused, for Fenton has always taught me that the G.o.ds can turn good to evil, and that the Jackal in particular can transform evil through his fire.
The twenty-fourth day of September in the 940th year a.g.l.
n.o.body has been killed yet. Mountside"s men are very much on edge. My father says it is likely that the hunter will avenge Roderick"s death in an especially terrible manner, so everyone is taking care to stay close to the village.
I was unable to visit the sanctuary until this afternoon. My father wanted me to help him pick the location for our new hall and to discuss the plans for building it. I tried to keep my mind on all that he was telling me, but after a while he began looking at me out of the edge of his eye, and eventually he said in a sharp voice that he could do better work without me. So I went running to the sanctuary.
The doors were open. I slowed to a walk and entered cautiously, but the sanctuary was empty and was dark from the shadows of the tapestries on the walls. The smoke-hole in the high ceiling beckoned in a beam of light that fell straight onto the altar, as it always does at noonday. When I was little, I thought that Fenton slept on the altar, since the sanctuary has no sleeping loft. Only when I grew older did I realize that he kept a pallet in the storeroom. Everything in the sanctuary is intended for the G.o.ds: the wood and pitch for the sacrifice, the everlasting flame from which Fenton lights the sacrificial fire, and the priest"s blade.
I used to spend hours looking at Fenton"s dagger when I was young. Unlike most priests" blades, its hilt is made of gold and is dotted with polished bloodstones; its blade, curving like the Jackal"s claws, is finely tempered and is kept honed as sharp as a thigh-dagger. Fenton told me once that his blade was made by a craftsman in the south, who created it for the High Priest, but since the High Priest has not yet shown his face, the craftsman loaned the dagger to Fenton. I love to watch Fenton practice bringing the sparkling blade down upon the sacrifice. He says that it is better for him to practice the swift death-stroke when the altar is bare than to miss the heart of the sacrificial beast and cause it more pain.
Today, when I arrived, the altar was bare, but the room smelled of burnt meat, so I surmised that Fenton had finished his noonday sacrifice and had gone to take the remaining goat-meat to our village butcher, to be distributed to the poorer members of the village as an offering to the G.o.ds. I looked for something in the sanctuary that I could tidy, but all was in place except for a piece of paper and a pen and an open inkwell. I walked over to stop up the inkwell before the ink should turn dry, and as I did so, I caught sight of my name on the paper.
It was a letter of some sort, though Fenton had not yet addressed it; it told of everything that has happened recently, from Hamar"s death until the events of two nights ago. Fenton ended the letter by saying, "From all that I have written, you will understand why I believe that my duties will soon be ending here and that, when we meet again, it will be in the manner which we once discussed. That this prospect does not grieve me is due mainly to Adrian: I feel that I have received richer rewards during my four years here with him than most men receive in a lifetime. Therefore, I leave now with the G.o.d"s peace in my heart and need only record here my very great love for you, in antic.i.p.ation of our reunion."
I read the last paragraph several times, my heart beating harder each time, until I looked up and found Fenton standing next to me.
For a moment, I failed to recognize him; all I saw was the sober-colored lesser free-man"s tunic. It has been many years since I last saw Fenton without his priests" robe. Then I noticed that the man before me had no blade at this belt. I swallowed the hardness in my throat, saying, "I"m sorry. I shouldn"t have been reading your correspondence."
"It doesn"t matter," he replied with half a smile. "I never write anything that might be dangerous for others to read."
I tried to puzzle this out, as he reached over to place the pen and ink back where they belonged, on the table where he keeps the holy instruments that are used only in the G.o.ds" service. Finally, finding no better way to speak my thoughts, I blurted out, "You"re leaving!"
"Only if the G.o.ds will it," he said. His long hair, which is usually tucked into his hood, veiled his face as he leaned forward. "If the G.o.ds permit it, I"ll stay."
I wanted to tell him that my father would never send him from the village, but my voice faltered as I watched Fenton gently place the pen and ink next to the silver blade. Fenton was a priest, and he had vowed to serve the G.o.ds; if he could not serve them here, he would have to go elsewhere. "I"ll come with you," I said at last.
Fenton raised his eyebrows as he turned round. "Leaving your father with no son to be his heir?"
I could make no answer to that; I knew that Fenton would think less of me if I failed in my duty to my father and my village. In the end, I asked, "Who were you writing to?"
Fenton glanced over at the doorway. People were pa.s.sing by, and I could hear my father"s voice nearby, giving instructions to our village carpenter. Without need for instruction, I went over to Fenton, and he and I left the sanctuary together, walking past the village boundaries toward the top of the mountain.
I went slowly, for Fenton"s sake; he did not grow up on a mountain, as I did, and it takes him time to scramble over the rocks. When we had reached the edge of the cliff, where the mountainside breaks free of forest, and scrub tickles the legs of pa.s.sersby, Fenton said, "I was writing to your cousin Emlyn."
I looked at Fenton with surprise. I knew, of course, that Fenton was the one who took Emlyn to the priests" house in hopes that the priests there could cure Emlyn"s long-standing mind-illness; I also knew that he had tutored Emlyn when they lived together at the priests" house. But Fenton had scarcely spoken of Emlyn since that time, except when my mother asked questions about him. Since Emlyn"s mother was my mother"s sister, my mother has a special fondness for my cousin.
"I didn"t know that you"d kept in contact," I said.
Fenton nodded, though his concentration was focussed on climbing over a jutting ledge. I paused to help him over the hard part. "Emlyn and I have written to each other since I left the south," Fenton said. "He sends his letters to the priest at Blackpa.s.s, and I pick them up there whenever I visit."
I thought about this as we made our way up the rocky path to the top of the mountain. Fenton"s exercise in subterfuge was perfectly sensible, of course. My father would not like the idea of any of us sending friendly letters to a native of Cold Run a not while our villages were feuding. I could not help but feel hurt, though, that Fenton had never revealed the secret of his correspondence to me. After all, our blood was now mixed, and our spirits had been mixed long before that.
As though guessing my thoughts, Fenton added, "Emlyn preferred that I not mention our correspondence to anyone. He embroiled himself in some trouble during his time at the priests" house a he never got along well with most of the priests there. Therefore, he has trying to live a quiet life now, hoping that people will forget his past so that he may freely make his mark on the future when the time comes."
"What sort of work does he do?" I asked as I scrambled my way up to the mountaintop, and then waited with restrained impatience as Fenton followed behind.
"He is a jeweller," replied Fenton, and smiled at my look.
A more unlikely profession for my cousin I could not have imagined. What little I remember of him is of an active boy, forever darting around our village when he came to visit a often in a secretive manner, since he and Griffith were fond of playing pranks on their elders. When he was not helping Griffith set up water-traps for men or locking indignant women in their chambers, Emlyn was most often busy ducking through the woods next to Mountside, playing Jackal and Prey. He was the best Jackal I ever knew, though he said that I was the best prey. Certainly I was the only boy who had any success in keeping hidden when he went hunting for us.
If I had thought about it, I would have imagined Emlyn as a soldier or a dagger-thrower or at the very least a fisherman. The idea of Emlyn being content to spend his life sitting on a bench, poring over bits of gold and emerald, was sorely disappointing.
"He"s not an ordinary jeweller," Fenton said loyally; he always seeks to see the best, even in men who have wasted their lives. "He sells his own work rather than depend on traders to do so a that allows him to travel a great deal. And his way of looking at precious metal and stones ... He sees into the heart of them. I remember standing in the work chamber of the priests" house when Emlyn was a boy, watching him craft a neck-chain for a n.o.blewoman. He told me a as though he were my tutor rather than I his a that the Koretian people are joined together by their love of the G.o.ds, like the links of a precious chain."
I puzzled over this image as we walked across the scrubby gra.s.s that shivered continuously from the wind from the black border mountains. "Joined together in what way?" I asked finally.
"I mused on that thought for many a day afterwards," Fenton responded. "I finally came to realize that what binds all of us together is our belief that we must make sacrifice to the G.o.ds. If I truly love the G.o.ds and their law, I will know when the right moment comes to offer up my sacrifice. That is true of all of us who love the G.o.ds."
I raised my eyes from our path and felt a shiver shudder over me as though I were gra.s.s, for as chance would take it, at that moment we were pa.s.sing the spot of my earliest memory.
Although I was only five at the time, I could still remember that day: hearing Emlyn give one of his lilting cries, like a wild animal, and then arriving at the mountaintop to see my cousin standing over the body of a dead man. At the time, being young and filled with stories of the G.o.ds, I had imagined that the Jackal would appear at any moment to carry the man away to the Land Beyond. I was therefore eager to help Emlyn start the funeral fire so that I could meet the G.o.d.
To my disappointment, the man had been alive, though close to death.
"You offered up your sacrifice to your G.o.d long ago," I said as we turned our paths toward the mountain range north of us. "You came to Koretia when your G.o.d called you, though you nearly died on the journey."
"The G.o.d was guiding me during that journey, else I would never have survived," said Fenton as we reached the edge of the mountaintop and sat down where I had rested on the day I mourned Hamar. "Few border-breachers make it past the patrol alive."
"You did, though," I said, feeling pride swell within me as I looked over at Fenton. Even in a lesser free-man"s tunic, he is no ordinary man, I decided. Fenton"s face contains something I have seen in few other men; my father once told me that Fenton has a look of patience that was won through endurance to hard pain. Fenton"s eyes, too, are beyond the ordinary a not dreamy, as one would expect in a pious priest, nor practical, as Felix"s eyes are. Fenton"s eyes are cautious and calculating, but not in a mean sense a rather, when Fenton looks at you, it is as though he sees everything in you, down to the blackest evil residing within you. And yet I have never heard him say a harsh word against anyone, not even the Emorian slave-master that he fled from.
"I had a.s.sistance," said Fenton, his left-hand fingers rubbing the slave-brand on his right arm as he stared out at the black peaks before us. "Do you remember that I mentioned my master"s son?"
"Yes, he helped you to escape." I was bubbling with pleasure that Fenton would discuss his life in Emor; he so rarely does. "He and an older boy he"d met in the Emorian borderland. The older boy gave you food for your journey, and your master"s son persuaded you to leave Emor."
"He did more than that for me," said Fenton, his gaze continuing to embrace the still peaks. "My master"s son and the older boy became acquainted because they both wanted to join the border mountain patrol a in fact, they had spent that day in the mountains, listening to the patrol guards whistle their signals."
"Whistle them?" I stiffened with excitement. This was a part of the story that Fenton had never told me.
Fenton nodded. The wind was blowing his hair into his face like a mask, but he was paying it no heed. "The patrol guards aren"t like any other soldiers. I remember how startled I was when I first caught sight of them, for I expected them to be in armor, like ordinary soldiers. I suppose, though, that the weight of leather, small as it is, is considered too high a price to pay for the loss of speed. Speed is all-important to the patrol a it is how they manage, against all odds, to catch breachers who are making their way through or near the pa.s.s in the mountains. Speed is important, and secrecy. If it hadn"t been for my master"s son, I wouldn"t have known that the guards were near me, until they had me surrounded. But my master"s son, who had spent the day watching and listening to the patrol as the guards went about their business, revealed to me one of the secrets of the patrol"s success.
"Rather than shout messages to one another a spoken messages that would be heard by the hunted a the guards instead whistle messages to one another. My master"s son, clever boy that he was, had managed to guess the meaning of a few of the whistles. Just a few; I believe that the patrol may have two dozen or more whistle-codes. But the few that he taught me were the most important ones, and with their help I was able to detect the changing movements of the guards and flee accordingly."
I had stayed quiet all this time, but now I pelted Fenton with the questions, like a Daxion archer sending forth his arrows. To my surprise, Fenton answered all my excited queries. Within the hour I had learned all of the whistle-codes Fenton had been taught, as well as facts about the patrol that Fenton had never before told me. I will have to record them here when I have greater leisure, but the one I remember most a because Fenton looked so grave when he said it a is that, if I ever crossed the border into Emor, I must never, ever draw my blade in the presence of a patrol guard. I am not sure why this is so. Perhaps it has to do with Emorian customs I have not yet learned.
As the afternoon shadows began to enfold us, I was still practicing the whistles a for Fenton, always the tutor, had insisted that if I were to learn them, I must learn them well. Fenton had his arm around me, which made me feel like a boy again, but so great was my contentment that I snuggled my head under his chin. I still am not as tall as Fenton, so it was easy to do that. I could hear Fenton"s heartbeat, as steady as well-balanced blade-steel, and the vibration of his voice as he said, "I"ve never wanted to reveal the patrol"s secrets to others. I breached the border through sore need but would not want others to follow in my footsteps. Yet it occurred to me today that the day may come when you will wish to visit Emor. I thought I should give you what information I could in antic.i.p.ation of that day."
"I wouldn"t need to breach the border, though," I murmured; I was beginning to grow sleepy in the heat of the sun. "My father would give me a letter of pa.s.sage... . You could come with me," it occurred to me to add. "You could visit your native land and show me places where you"d lived. The patrol wouldn"t recognize you in your robe. Where is your priests" robe, by the way?"
"Your mother fetched it away this morning to mend it, before I awoke," said Fenton; I could hear the smile in his voice. "I think it was her way of apologizing."
I was silent for a long moment, listening to the regular pace of Fenton"s heart. Then I said, "Fenton, I tried to talk with my father-"
"It doesn"t matter." Fenton"s voice was quiet. "If this brings good that I cannot yet see, then I am glad. If it brings evil, then I am sure that the G.o.ds can transform that evil to good... . We were talking of sacrifice before."
This was such a sudden change of topic that it took me a moment to retrace our conversation. I could feel Fenton"s hand tighten on my arm, as though he were thinking hard about what to say next. "Yes," I said with a yawn. "Sacrifice. You gave your sacrifice a long time ago."
For a moment more, Fenton"s hand remained tight on my arm. Then it loosened, as though a decision had been made. "Not my sacrifice only," he said. "The dearest desire of my master"s son had been to join the patrol, yet he broke Emorian law in revealing to me the patrol"s secrets so that I could breach the border. He was too honest a boy to lie about his crime to others, so in aiding me, he lost his chance to join the border mountain patrol. I"ve never forgotten the sacrifice he made for me."