My body? Leo examined himself. It was his regular, familiar body, known to him intimately; it was his, not Eldritchs.
I willed you to emerge here exactly as you are in our universe, Eldritch said. You see, thats the point that appealed to Hepburn-Gilbert, who of course is a Buddhist. You can reincarnate in any form you wish, or thats wished for you, as in this situation.
So thats why the UN bit, Leo said. It explained a great deal.
With Chew-Z one can pa.s.s from life to life, be a bug, a physics teacher, a hawk, a protozoon, a slime mold, a streetwalker in Paris in 1904, a Even, Leo said, a gluck. Which one of us is the gluck, there?
I told you; I made it out of a portion of myself. You could shape something. Go aheadproject a fraction of your essence; itll take material form on its own. What you supply is the logos. Remember that?
I remember, Leo said. He concentrated, and presently there formed not far off an unwieldy ma.s.s of wires and bars and gridlike extensions.
What the h.e.l.l is that? Eldritch demanded.
A gluck trap.
Eldritch put his head back and laughed. Very good. But please dont build a Palmer Eldritch trap; I still have things I want to say. He and Leo watched the gluck suspiciously approach the trap, sniffing. It entered and the trap banged shut. The gluck was caught, and now the trap dispatched it; one quick sizzle, a small plume of smoke, and the gluck had vanished.
In the air before Leo a small section shimmered; out of it emerged a black book, which he accepted, thumbed through, then, satisfied, put down on his lap.
Whats that? Eldritch asked.
A King James Bible. I thought it might help protect me.
Not here, Eldritch said. This is my domain. He gestured at the bible and it vanished. You could have your own, though, and fill it with bibles. As can everyone. As soon as our operations are underway. Were going to have layouts, of course, but that comes later with our Terran activities. And anyhow thats a formality, a ritual to ease the transition. Can-D and Chew-Z will be marketed on the same basis, in open compet.i.tion; well claim nothing for Chew-Z that you dont claim for your product. We dont want to scare people away; religion has become a touchy subject. It will only be after a few tries that they realize the two different aspects: the lack of a time lapse and the other, perhaps the more vital. That it isnt fantasy, that they enter a genuine new universe.
Many persons feel that about Can-D, Leo pointed out. They hold it as an article of faith that theyre actually on Earth.
Fanatics, Eldritch said with disgust. Obviously its illusion because there is no Perky Pat and no Walt Ess.e.x and anyhow the structure of their fantasy environment is limited to the artifacts actually installed in their layout; they cant operate the automatic dishwasher in the kitchen unless a min of one was installed in advance. And a person who doesnt partic.i.p.ate can watch and see that the two dolls dont go anywhere; no one is in them. It can be demonstrated But youre going to have trouble convincing those people, Leo said. Theyll stay loyal to Can-D. Theres no real dissatisfaction with Perky Pat; why should they give up Ill tell you, Eldritch said. Because however wonderful being Perky Pat and Walt is for a while, eventually theyre forced to return to their hovels. Do you know how that feels, Leo? Try it sometime; wake up in a hovel on Ganymede after youve been freed for twenty, thirty minutes. Its an experience youll never forget.
Hmm.
And theres something elseand you know what it is, too. When the little period of escape is over and the colonist returns hes not fit to resume a normal, daily life. Hes demoralized. But if instead of Can-D hes chewed He broke off. Leo was not listening; he was involved in constructing another artifact in the air before him.
A short flight of stairs appeared, leading into a luminous hoop. The far end of the flight of stairs could not be seen.
Where does that go? Eldritch demanded, an irritated expression on his face.
New York City, Leo said. Itll take me back to P. P. Layouts. He rose and walked to the flight of stairs. I have a feeling, Eldritch, that somethings wrong , some aspect of this Chew-Z product. And we wont discover what it is until too late. He began climbing the stairs and then he remembered the girl, Monica; he wondered if she was all right, here in Palmer Eldritchs world. What about the child? He stopped his climb. Below him, but seemingly far off, he could make out Eldritch, still seated with his stick on the gra.s.s. The glucks didnt get her, did they?
Eldritch said, I was the little girl. Thats what Im trying to explain to you; thats why I say it means genuine reincarnation, triumph over death.
Blinking, Leo said, Then the reason she was familiar He ceased, and looked again.
On the gra.s.s Eldritch was gone. The child Monica, with her suitcase full of Dr. Smile, sat there instead. So it was evident, now.
He was tellingshe, they were tellingthe truth.
Slowly, Leo walked back down the stairs and out onto the gra.s.s once more.
The child, Monica, said, Im glad youre not leaving, Mr. Bulero. Its nice to have someone smart and evolved like you to talk to. She patted the suitcase resting on the gra.s.s beside her. I went back and got him; he was terrified of the glucks. I see you found something that would handle them. She nodded toward his gluck trap, which now empty, awaited another victim. Very ingenious of you. I hadnt thought of it; I just got the h.e.l.l out of there. A diencephalic panic-reaction.
To her Leo said hesitantly, Youre Palmer, are you? I mean, down underneath? Actually?
Take the medieval doctrine of substance versus accidents, the child said pleasantly. My accidents are those of this child, but my substance, as with the wine and the wafer in transubstantiation Okay, Leo said. Youre Eldritch; I believe you. But I still dont like this place. Those glucks Dont blame them on Chew-Z, the child said. Blame them on me; theyre a product of my mind, not of the lichen. Does every new universe constructed have to be nice? I like glucks in mine; they appeal to something in me.
Suppose I want to construct my own universe, Leo said. Maybe theres something evil in me, too, some aspect of my personality I dont know about. That would cause me to produce a thing even more ugly than what youve brought into being. At least with the Perky Pat layouts one was limited to what one had provided in advance, as Eldritch himself had pointed out. Andthere was a certain safety in this.
Whatever it was could be abolished, the child said indifferently. If you found you didnt like it. And if you did like it She shrugged. Keep it, then. Why not? Whos hurt? Youre alone in your Instantly she broke off, clapping her hand to her mouth.
Alone, Leo said. You mean each person goes to a different subjective world? Its not like the layouts, then, because everyone in the group who takes Can-D goes to the layout, the men to Walt, the women into Perky Pat. But that means youre not here. Or, he thought, Im not here. But in that case The child watched him intently, trying to gauge his reaction.
We havent taken Chew-Z, Leo said quietly. This is all a hypnogogic, absolutely artificially induced pseudoenvironment. Were not anywhere except where we started from; were still at your demesne on Luna. Chew-Z doesnt create any new universe and you know it. Theres no bona fide reincarnation with it. This is all just one big snow-job.
The child was silent. But she had not taken her eyes from him; her eyes burned, cold and bright, unwinking.
Leo said, Come on, Palmer; what does Chew-Z really do?
I told you. The childs voice was harsh.
This is not even as real as Perky Pat, as the use of our own drug. And even that is open to the question as regards the validity of the experience, its authenticity versus it as purely hypnogogic or hallucinatory. So obviously there wont be any discussion about this; its patently the latter.
No, the child said. And you better believe me, because if you dont you wont get out of this world alive.
You cant die in a hallucination, Leo said. Any more than you can be born again. Im going back to P. P. Layouts. Once more he started toward the stairs.
Go ahead and climb, the child said from behind him. See if I care. Wait and see where it gets you.
Leo climbed the stairs, and pa.s.sed through the luminous hoop.
Blinding, ferociously hot sunlight descended on him; he scuttled from the open street to a nearby doorway for shelter.
A jet cab, from the towering high buildings, swooped down, spying him. A ride, sir? Better get indoors; its almost noon.
Gasping, almost unable to breathe, Leo said, Yes, thanks. Take me to P. P. Layouts. He unsteadily got into the cab, and fell back at once against the seat, panting in the coolness provided by its ant.i.thermal shield.
The cab took off. Presently it was descending at the enclosed field of his companys central building.
As soon as he reached his outer office he said to Miss Gleason, Get hold of Mayerson. Find out why he didnt do anything to rescue me.
Rescue you? Miss Gleason said, in consternation. What was the matter, Mr. Bulero? She followed him to the inner office. Where were you and in what way Just get Mayerson. He seated himself at his familiar desk, relieved to be back here. The h.e.l.l with Palmer Eldritch, he said to himself, and reached into the desk drawer for his favorite English briar pipe and half-pound can of Sail tobacco, a Dutch cavendish mix.
He was busy lighting his pipe when the door opened and Barney Mayerson appeared, looking sheepish and worn.
Well? Leo said. He puffed energetically on his pipe.
Barney said, I He turned to Miss Fugate, who had come in alter him; gesturing, he turned again to Leo and said, Anyhow youre back.
Of course Im back. I built myself a stairway to here. Arent you going to answer as to why you didnt do anything? I guess not. But as you say, you werent needed. Ive now got an idea of what this new Chew-Z substance is like. Its definitely inferior to Can-D. I have no qualms in saying that emphatically. You can tell without doubt that its merely a hallucinogenic experience youre undergoing. Now lets get down to business. Eldritch has sold Chew-Z to the UN by claiming that it induces genuine reincarnation, which ratifies the religious convictions of more than half the governing members of the General a.s.sembly, plus that Indian skunk Hepburn-Gilbert himself. Its a fraud, because Chew-Z doesnt do that. But the worst aspect of Chew-Z is the solipsistic quality. With Can-D you undergo a valid interpersonal experience, in that the others in your hovel are He paused irritably. What is it, Miss Fugate? What are you staring at?
Roni Fugate murmured, Im sorry, Mr. Bulero, but theres a creature under your desk.
Bending, Leo peered under the desk.
A thing had squeezed itself between the base of the desk and the floor; its eyes regarded him greenly, unwinking.
Get out of there, Leo said. To Barney he said, Get a yardstick or a broom, something to prod it with.
Barney left the office.
Danm it, Miss Fugate, Leo said, smoking rapidly on his pipe, I hate to think what that is under there. And what it signifies. Because it might signify that Eldritch within the little girl Monicahad been right when she said See if I care. Wait and see where it gets you .
The thing from beneath the desk scuttled out, and made for the door. It squeezed under the door and was gone.
It was even worse than the glucks. He got one good look at it.
Leo said, Well, thats that. Im sorry, Miss Fugate, but you might as well return to your office; theres no point in our discussing what actions to take toward the imminent appearance of Chew-Z on the market. Because Im not talking to anyone; Im sitting here blabbing away to myself. He felt depressed. Eldritch had him and also the validity, or at least the seeming validity, of the Chew-Z experience had been demonstrated; he himself had confused it with the real. Only the malign bug created by Palmer Eldritchdeliberatelyhad given it away.
Otherwise, he realized, I might have gone on forever.
Spent a century, as Eldritch said, in this ersatz universe.
Jeez, he thought. Im licked. Miss Fugate, he said, please dont just stand there; go back to your office. He got up, went to the water cooler, and poured himself a paper cup of mineral water. Drinking unreal water for an unreal body, he said to himself. In front of an unreal employee. Miss Fugate, he said, are you really Mr. Mayersons mistress?
Yes, Mr. Bulero, Miss Fugate said, nodding. As I told you.
And you wont be mine. He shook his head. Because Im too old and too evolved. You knowor rather you dont knowthat I have at least a limited power in this universe. I could make over my body, make myself young. Or , he thought, make you old. How would you like that? he wondered. He dank the water, and tossed the cup in the waste chute; not looking at Miss Fugate he said to himself, Youre my age, Miss Fugate. In fact older. Lets see; youre about ninety-two, now. In this world, anyhow; youve aged, here time has rolled forward for you because you turned me down and I dont like being turned down. In fact, he said to himself, youre over one hundred years old, withered, juiceless, without teeth and eyes. A thing.
Behind him he heard a dry, rasping sound, an intake of breath. And a wavering, shrill voice, like the cry of a frightened bird. Oh, Mr. Bulero Ive changed my mind, Leo thought. Youre the way you were; I take it back, okay? He turned, and saw Roni Fugate or at least something standing there where she had last stood. A spider web, gray fungoid strands wrapped one around another to form a brittle column that swayed he saw the head, sunken at the cheeks, with eyes like dead spots of soft, inert white slime that leaked out gummy, slow-moving tears, eyes that tried to appeal but could not because they could not make out where he was.
Youre back the way you were, Leo said harshly, and shut his own eyes. Tell me when its over.
Footsteps. A mans. Barney, re-entering the office. Jesus, Barney said, and halted.
Eyes shut, Leo said, Isnt she back the way she was yet?
She?Wheres Roni? Whats this?
Leo opened his eyes.
It was not Roni Fugate who stood there, not even an ancient manifestation of her; it was a puddle, but not of water. The puddle was alive and in it bits of sharp, jagged gray splinters swam.
The thick, oozing material of the puddle flowed gradually outward, then shuddered, and retracted into itself; in the center the fragments of hard gray matter swam together, and cohered into a roughly shaped ball with tangled, matted strands of hair floating at its crown. Vague eyesockets, empty, formed; it was becoming a skull, but of some life-formation to come: his unconscious desire for her to experience evolution in its horrific aspect had conjured this monstrosity into being.
The jaw clacked, opening and shutting as if jerked by wicked, deeply imbedded wires; drifting here and there in the fluid of the puddle it croaked, But you see, Mr. Bulero, she didnt live that long. You forgot that. It was, remotely but absolutely, the voicenot of Roni Fugate but Monica, as if drumming at the far-distant end of a waxed string. You made her past one hundred but she only is going to live to be seventy. So shes been dead thirty years, except you made her alive; that was what you intended. And even worse The toothless jaw waggled and the uninhabited pockets for eyes gaped. She evolved not while alive, but there in the ground. The skull ceased piping, then by stages disintegrated; its parts once more floated away and the semblance of organization again dissipated.
After a time Barney said, Get us out of here, Leo.
Leo said, Hey, Palmer. His voice was uncontrolled, babylike with fear. Hey, you know what? I give up; I really do.
The carpet of the office beneath his feet rotted, became mushy, and then sprouted, grew, alive, into green fibers; he saw that it was becoming gra.s.s. And then the walls and the ceiling caved in, collapsed into fine dust; the particles rained noiselessly down like ashes. And the blue, cool sky appeared, untouched, above.
Seated on the gra.s.s, with the stick in her lap and the suitcase containing Dr. Smile beside her, Monica said, Did you want Mr. Mayerson to remain? I didnt think so. I let him go with the rest that you made. Okay? She smiled up at Leo.
Okay, he agreed chokingly. Looking around him he saw now only the plain of green; even the dust which had composed P. P. Layouts, the building and its core of people, had vanished, except for a dim layer that remained on his hands, on his coat; he brushed it off, reflexively.
Monica said, From dust thou art come, oh man; to dust shalt Okay! he said loudly. I get it; you dont have to hammer me over the noggin with it. So it was irreal; so what? I mean, you made your G.o.dd.a.m.n point, Eldritch; you can do anything here you want, and Im nothing, Im just a phantom. He felt hatred toward Palmer Eldritch and he thought, If I ever get out of here, if I can escape from you, you b.a.s.t.a.r.d Now, now, the girl said, her eyes dancing. You are not going to use language like that; you really arent, because I wont let you. I wont even say what Ill do if you continue, but you know me, Mr. Bulero. Right?
Leo said, Right. He walked off a few steps, got out his handkerchief, and mopped the perspiration from his upper lip and neck, the hollow beneath his adams apple where it was so hard, in the mornings, to shave. G.o.d , he thought, help me. Will You? And if You do, if You can reach into this world, Ill do anything, whatever You want; Im not afraid now, Im sick. This is going to kill my body, even if its just an ectoplasmic, phantom-type body .
Hunched over, he was sick; he vomited onto the gra.s.s. For a long timeit seemed a long timethat kept up and then he was better; he was able to turn, and walk slowly back toward the seated child with her suitcase.
Terms, the child said flatly. Were going to work out an exact business relationship between my company and yours. We need your superb network of ad satellites and your transportation system of late-model interplan ships and your G.o.d-knows-how-extensive plantations on Venus; we want everything, Bulero. Were going to grow the lichen where you now grow Can-D, ship it in the same ships, reach the colonists with the same well-trained, experienced pushers you use, advertise through pros like Allen and Charlotte Faine. Can-D and Chew-Z wont be competing because therell just be the one product, Chew-Z; youre about to announce your retirement. Understand me, Leo?
Sure, Leo said. I hear.
Will you do it?
Okay, Leo said. And pounced on the child.
His hands closed about her windpipe; he squeezed. She stared into his face, rigidly, her mouth pursed, saying nothing, not even trying to struggle, to claw him or get away. He continued squeezing, for a time so long that it seemed as if his hands had grown fast to her, become fixed in place forever, like gnarled roots of some ancient, diseased, but still-living plant.
When he let go she was dead. Her body settled forward, then twisted and fell to one side, to come to rest supine on the gra.s.s. No blood. No sign even of a struggle, except that her throat was a dark, mottled, blackish red.
He stood up, thinking, Well, did I do it? If h.e.s.h.e or it, whatever it isdies here, does that take care of it?
But the simulated world remained. He had expected it to dwindle away as herEldritchslife dwindled away.
Puzzled, he stood without moving an inch, sniffing the air, listening to a far-off wind. Nothing had changed except that the girl had died. Why? What ailed the basis on which he had acted? Incredibly, it was wrong.
Bending, he snapped on Dr. Smile. Explain it to me, he said.
Obligingly, Dr. Smile tinnily declared, He is dead here, Mr. Bulero. But at the demesne on Luna Okay, Leo said roughly. Well, tell me how to get out of this place. How do I get back to Luna, to He gestured. You know what I mean. Actuality.
At this moment, Dr. Smile explained, Palmer Eldritch, although considerably upset and angered, is intravenously providing you with a substance which counters the injectable Chew-Z previously administered; you will return shortly. It added, That is, shortly, even instantly, in terms of the time-flow in that world. As to this It chuckled. It could seem longer.
Howlonger?
Oh, years, Dr. Smile said. But quite possibly less. Days? Months? Time sense is subjective, so lets see how it feels to you; do you not agree?
Seating himself wearily by the body of the child, Leo sighed, put his head down, chin against his chest, and prepared to wait.
Ill keep you company, Dr. Smile said, if I can. But Im afraid without Mr. Eldritchs animating presence Its voice, Leo realized, had become feeble, as well as slowed down. Nothing can sustain this world, it intoned weakly, but Mr. Elditch. So I am afraid Its voice faded out entirely.
There was only silence. Even the distant wind had ceased.
How long? Leo asked himself. And then he wondered if he could, as before, make something.
Gesturing in the manner of an inspired symphony conductor, his hands writhing, he tried to create before him in the air a jet cab.