She laughed uneasily.
"No, Monte; because you were just yourself yesterday."
He wondered about that. He wondered, if he placed before her all the facts, including the hours after he left her, if she would have said that. Here was his second opportunity to tell her what he had planned.
If he did not intend to go on, he should speak now. To-morrow it would be too late. By noon it would be too late. By the time they finished their breakfast, it would be too late.
He met her eyes. They were steady as planets. They were honest and clear and clean and confident. They trusted him, and he knew it. He took a deep breath and leaned forward. Impulsively she leaned across the table and placed her hand upon his.
"Dear old Monte," she breathed.
It was too late--now! He saw her in a sort of mist of dancing golden motes. He felt the steady throb of her pulse.
She withdrew her hand as quickly as she had given it. It was as if she did not dare allow it to remain there. It was that which made him smile with a certain confidence of his own.
"What we"d better do," he said, "is to get out of Paris. I"m afraid the pace here is too hot for us."
"To etois?" she asked.
"That"s as good a place as any. Could you start this afternoon?"
"If you wish."
"The idea is to move on as soon as you begin to think," he explained, with his old-time lightness. "Of course, the best way is to walk. If you can"t walk--why, the next best thing--"
He paused a moment to consider a new idea. It was odd that it had never occurred to him before.
"I have it!" he continued. "We"ll go to etois by motor. It"s a beautiful drive down there. I made the trip alone three years ago in a car I owned. We"ll take our time, putting up at the little villages along the way. We"ll let the sun soak into us. We"ll get away from people. It"s people who make you worry. I have a notion it will be good for us both. This Hamilton episode has left us a bit morbid.
What we need is something to bring us back to normal."
"I"d love it," she fell in eagerly. "We"ll just play gypsy."
"Right. Now, what you want to do is to throw into a dress-suitcase a few things, and we"ll ship the trunks by rail to Nice. All you need is a toothbrush, a change of socks, and--"
"There"s Marie," she interrupted.
"Can"t we ship her by rail too?"
"No, Monte," she answered, with a decided shake of her head.
"But, hang it all, people don"t go a-gypsying with French maids!"
"Why not?" she demanded.
She asked the question quite honestly. He had forgotten Marie utterly until this moment, and she seemed to join the party like an intruder.
Always she would be upon the back seat.
"Wouldn"t you feel freer without her?" he asked.
"I should n"t feel at all proper," she declared.
"Then we might just as well not have been married."
"Only," she laughed, "if we had n"t taken that precaution it would n"t have been proper for me to go, even with Marie."
"I"m glad we"ve accomplished something, anyhow," he answered good-naturedly.
"We"ve accomplished a great deal," she a.s.sured him. "Yesterday morning I could n"t--at this time--have done even the proper things and felt proper. Oh, you don"t know how people look at you, and how that look makes you feel, even when you know better. I could n"t have sat here at breakfast with you and felt comfortable. Now we can sit here and plan a wonderful trip like this. It"s all because you"re just Monte."
"And you just you!"
"Only I don"t count for anything. It makes me feel even more selfish than I am."
"Don"t count?" he exclaimed. "Why--"
He stifled the words that sprang to his lips. It was only because she thought she did not count that she was able to feel comfortable. Once let her know that she counted as at that moment she did count to him, and even what little happiness he was able to bring her would vanish.
He would be to her then merely one of the others--even as he was to himself.
He rose abruptly.
"I must see about getting a machine," he said. "I want to start this afternoon if possible."
"I"ll be ready," she agreed.
As they went out to the office, the clerk stepped up to him.
"I have secured the reservation, monsieur," he announced.
"Please cancel it," replied Monte.
"Reservation?" inquired Marjory.
"On the Calais express--for a friend of mine who has decided not to go," he answered.
CHAPTER XII
A WEDDING JOURNEY
Monte made an extravagant purchase: a new high-powered touring car capacious enough for a whole family--his idea being, that the roomier the car, the less Marie would show up in it. On the other hand, if he cared to consider her in that way, Marie would be there as much for his protection as Marjory"s. The task that lay ahead of him this next week was well defined; it was to get back to normal. He had diagnosed his disease--now he must cure it. It would have been much easier to have done this by himself, but this was impossible. He must learn to gaze steadily into her eyes, while gazing into them; he must learn to look indifferently upon her lips, with her within arm"s reach of him. Here was a man"s job.
He was not even to have the machine to occupy his attention; for there was no time to secure a license, and so he must take with him a chauffeur. He was fortunate in being able to secure one on the spot--Louis Santerre, a good-looking lad with the best of recommendations. He ordered him to be at the hotel at three.
Thus, in less than an hour from the time he entered the salesroom, Monte had bought and paid for his car, hired his man, given orders for certain accessories, and left, with Monsieur Mansart bowing him out and heartily wishing that all his customers were of this type.
There were, however, several little things that Monte still wished to purchase--an automobile coat and cap, for one thing; also some rugs.
These he found in a near-by store. It was as he was leaving that the clerk--who, it seems, must have had an eye--noticed the shiny new gold ring upon Monte"s left hand.