One look from Draven told me this had all been planned and he knew if no one could see us I would give it my all back. He had been right and that is what he wanted Justin to see. Mission accomplished! I was fuming inside but knew I couldn"t show it in front of Justin. I was now sick to death of this game the two of them had me playing and for the first time since I"d met Draven I didn"t want to look at him!
Instead of saying goodbye again I just grabbed Justin"s hand and dragged him to the front entrance leaving Draven at the bar. I didn"t miss the evil wink and mouthed words "Good luck" that were directed at Justin as I pulled him past.
Once I was nearer the door, however angry I was, I still couldn"t help the little look over my shoulder to see if he was still staring at us. The answer was no. He was nowhere to be seen, he had just disappeared because there is no way he could have made it back through the crowd in that time. How did he get away like that with every eye in the room locked on his every move, I wondered?
Outside the cold air helped to clear my clouded mind but my anger stuck to me despite the weather. It had started to snow while we had been in the club and was quickly covering the ground with an icy blanket which would turn deadly soon enough. I had made the right choice leaving now as I didn"t yet have snow chains on big blue.
I didn"t look at Justin once as we snaked our way through the parked cars to get to my truck. Then Justin startled me making me turn round to his raucous laughter.
"What are you laughing at?" I asked not bothering to hide my hacked off tone.
"Just wondering if you make everyone who meets you this crazy?" That question hit me harder than I cared to admit, considering my past. After staring at him for longer than intended, I turned before he could see my eyes well up.
"Oh no Keira...I didn"t mean it like that!" He ran over to me just as I took my next step. He gently put his hands on my shoulders to turn me round to face him.
"Look at me!" He whispered and when I didn"t, he placed the back of his hand under my chin.
"I"m sorry. I didn"t mean to be an insensitive jerk."
"And back in there?" I nodded to the doors which we had just exited but he didn"t look back.
"What I meant...what I mean is..."
"Justin, don"t!" I stopped him knowing what was coming next. I didn"t want to do this now, h.e.l.l I didn"t want to do this ever! The last conversation we had like this was a lifetime ago. I wasn"t even the same person anymore. Back then, of course, I had been in his shoes. He had been the one with the girlfriend and he had been the one telling me it could never happen. Well those words still rang true.
It could never happen.
"Why not, because you have some weird, possessive boyfriend who can buy you back?"
"Now that hurt!" I said and pulled out of his hold.
"I didn"t mean it the way you took it." He snapped back, making his hair coil round one shoulder. I stood hands on hips waiting.
"I meant it with concern. I"m worried about you. That guy in there isn"t right, I don"t know what it is but I can"t shake the feeling that he"s...he"s..."
"He"s what?"
"Dangerous!" He spoke the word like he could somehow be over heard. I knew the truth and sure, sometimes it frightened me, but was it worse not knowing? What if that night had never happened and I just kept going through life working at the club, being obsessed with Draven, never to find out the truth...Would I be scared?
I didn"t know what to say to him. Anything I said would end up being a lie, so I said the only thing that I knew would end this conversation... I spoke the truth.
"Justin, I love him." I looked like I had broken him. He started to shake his head but once he saw the truth in my eyes he stopped this motion. He let his shoulders drop and simply said, "Ok."
"Come on, let"s go home and raid the cupboards." I said light heartedly pulling him back into the now. I automatically opened his side first before climbing into the driver"s seat. Big blue was cold and I had to give her a minute to start.
"All that money and he can"t buy you a nice, reliable ca?r" I hit him playful on the arm, just glad that he was getting back to his usual c.o.c.ky self.
"I love this car and shut up before it hears you, or we will never get home."
"That"s fine with me but I warn you, I get cold quickly, so you"ll have to use your body heat to keep that from happening." He received another playful punch, which he caught. He held his hand over my wrist and I flinched at him being so close to my scars. He looked down and then smiled at my gloves before letting go.
"I never told anyone, you know." His confession shocked me but I couldn"t respond.
"When it happened I wanted to come and see you so badly but I knew I couldn"t. You didn"t need that. You didn"t need me to get involved. But I want you to know that I would have been there for you." He looked down at his tanned hands that were fiddling nervously with his belt end, it made me want to comfort him but I couldn"t move.
"I broke it off with Jessica that year because she didn"t understand why I wouldn"t tell her. She overheard my parents on the phone to Frank asking how you were and after that she wanted to know all the details. The stupid cow acted like it was gossip! After that I couldn"t look at her. I don"t know why I"m telling you this now but I guess it"s easier to express past regrets to the person you regret them with."
"Regrets?" I whispered out in a frosty breath.
"I always regretted saying no to you that night. I replayed it over and over on the plane ride home, knowing I had made the wrong choice. Draven had been right when he had said not to let oceans get in the way...A real man never would. I arrogantly thought that by coming back here you would be waiting with open arms to have me as your boyfriend. G.o.d how conceited am I!" At this I moved to cover my hand with his. He was warmer than I was and the cold touch of my fingers made him look up at me.
"I knew I never trusted that Jessica!" I said making him laugh. I felt instantly better at the sound. Guilt was tearing into me but I couldn"t do anything about it. Anything I said would have been a lie to make him feel better, which I couldn"t bring myself to do, knowing full well it would do more harm than good.
The rest of the way home he remained quiet and I didn"t want to be the one to break into his thoughts first just so I could make myself feel better. I now wanted to take full responsibility for the way tonight had gone but I knew deep down the reason I felt this guilt was down to him bringing up my past. I couldn"t help the choices he had made and where he now stood because of them but that didn"t mean I wasn"t sympathetic to them either. If anything, my mind was in more turmoil now than it had been in the club. Back then I only had Draven"s actions to worry about, now it was my own actions that were the problem. What could I do to make everyone happy? I didn"t want to be the cause of anyone"s pain, let alone continue causing it.
Thankfully autopilot had gotten us this far and it was only when we started to b.u.mp along the dirt gravel road that I realised we were home. I glanced towards Justin from the corner of my eye to find him still fixated on the side window. I cut the engine and sat for a minute before turning to say something.
"Justin, look I..." I stopped mid-sentence and my eyes fixated on what Justin had been looking at all this time. As soon as my brain registered what I was seeing my vision started to go foggy. Tears welled up until they became too heavy and overflowed down my cold cheeks.
"Who would do this?" Justin"s voice cut through the nightmare, pulling me out of a frozen lake I was drowning in. I couldn"t speak. I just kept repeating the words that were crudely plastered on my side window over and over.
I FOUND YOU.
YOU CAN"T HIDE FROM ME I"M COMING TO GET YOU SEE YOU SOON MY KEIRA X.
It looked like it had been written on with red paint for effect. I still hadn"t answered Justin. Instead I just got out of the car and started to walk away. I couldn"t handle it anymore. I had hit my limit and found my breaking point.
I didn"t know where I was going but I soon found myself running. I just needed to get away from it all...Demons...Angels and especially Stalkers! The price I was paying for Draven was turning into something far too deep for me to handle. I wanted to run to him and tell him everything, but every time the thought entered my head it was as though something else was pushing it back out again. Excuses that weren"t my own kept clouding my resolution.
I got as far as the forest wall when Justin caught up with me, forcing me to stop and turn to look at him. Under the moonlight he bared a startling resemblance to an Angel, with his long dreads looking like roped gold and eyes pure of heart. He held me still but when I didn"t respond to his words, he gave me a little shake.
"Keira! Listen to me!" The panic in his voice mirrored the panic in my mind that felt like it would soon burst from me. I didn"t know what to do! I couldn"t tell him the truth...how could I? Who could I tell...Sophia...Vincent? NO! They would tell Draven and for these reasons my thoughts quickly shifted without result. What was wrong with me, why couldn"t I just tell him?
"Who did that? Was it him?" Justin looked furious now but I was in shock. Did he know about Lucius?
"Who?" I asked in a shaky voice that crept up a notch.
"Who? That crazy a.r.s.e boyfriend of yours that"s who! It"s because he"s jealous of us, isn"t it? He"s trying to frighten you, can"t you see?" I was stunned. He thought Draven would do this...was he nuts!
"NO, OF COURSE NOT! " I yelled at him for just thinking it, let alone confessing it.
"He"s brainwashed you."
"Justin please, you don"t know him. He would never do this." I was pleading with him to believe me but I knew his prejudice towards Draven wouldn"t let himself trust in what I was saying.
"Then who did?"
"I don"t know...maybe some sicko who knows about my past and gets his kicks scaring young girls." It was a long shot but it was all I had to go with. I didn"t really want to bring up my past for the second time tonight but I was running out of options.
"And that"s what you believe it is, because if you do then we should call the cops." Oh no, this was bad. What was I supposed to do now, call them and say what?...Umm I think the Vampire King called Lucius is trying to kidnap me to get back at a Demon/ Angel half breed sent from heaven and h.e.l.l...Oh and it just so happens he"s my boyfriend!... Mmm I don"t think so somehow.
"Look Justin, you will just have to trust me here. I don"t want to involve the police or anyone else for that matter. If it gets worse then I will do something about it but for now please, just be my friend." At this he finally subsided his anger and I could just make out his eyes soften at my request. He still hadn"t released me from his hold and after moments of praying for his trust in me, he finally gave me his answer.
"Come here." He said before pulling me in for an embrace. He wrapped his arms securely round me and I let my head rest on his shoulder. I was tired of fighting and being brave. I just wanted to feel another human emotion that was as weak and fragile as I was. I loved Draven with every breath in my body but right now...at this moment, I just needed to feel equal. So I shamefully allowed myself to be held and buried the immense guilt that was mounting up, deep and far away from this moment. I moved my arms and rested them on the lower part of his back while his were doing the same.
Then I couldn"t help myself. I couldn"t stop the tears from flowing once the first drop left my tired eyes. Soon I was sobbing. I was gasping for breath as I cried my heart out all on Justin"s shirt. He moved one hand to the back of my head and stroked my hair giving me the much needed comfort that I craved.
"Ssshh, you"re alright. I"ve got you." It was these words that brought me back. He didn"t have me, Draven did. I pulled back but Justin automatically tightened his grip around my waist. I didn"t want to make it look obvious that I felt uncomfortable. I didn"t want to hurt his feelings but on the other hand I didn"t want him getting the wrong idea.
But it was too late. He raised his hand to wipe my salty cheeks dry but in doing so he brushed my lips with his thumb. I held my breath thinking of ways to stop this from happening. Sentences were spilling out of my mind but only one word made it pa.s.sed my lips.
"Please..." He took my plea for something else and moved his face closer to mine before I could stop what came next. The lips that met my own were soft but urgent. I tried to pull away but his softness soon turned to hard pressure on my mouth. He held my neck with one hand and his other hand gripped at the material of my top, near my side. He was surprisingly strong but my will was stronger. At the moment that he tried to force my mouth open I pushed all my weight forward like I was doing a rugby tackle but it was only enough to move him enough to free my lips.
"NO!" I shouted making him frown in the dark and this quickly gave him a new edge as the bad boy act didn"t seem too much like an act anymore. He tried again taking on a new rough approach but at this I saw red and pulled my arm back as far as it would go, before clenching my fingers into a fist and letting it fly.
"ARGGGHHH!" I knew I"d hit my mark even before I heard Justin wallow in pain. It had felt like my knuckles had crumbled like cookie crumbs. They started to throb instantly but my anger was still keeping my adrenaline levels up for the real hurt to sink in fully.
"What did you do that for?" He was angry but no way as near as angry as I was.
"Are you an idiot? I said NO, which guess what, in the world of crossing lines you just crossed a big one!" He was still nursing his jaw and a spilt lip that I had amazingly given him, when he decided to play the fool.
"I knew you wanted me to, you"re just scared of being caught, but I am not afraid of your rich, pompous a.r.s.e boyfriend...Not by a long shot!"
"Then you"re a bigger fool that I took you for! You think I"m angry, just thank yourself b.l.o.o.d.y lucky you only ended up with a spilt lip because I can guarantee you, if Draven had been here, you would have earned yourself a lot more than a bruised ego!" I raised my arms up in the air and turned my back on him walking away to think. I couldn"t bear to think of what Draven would have done, but I know one thing, I don"t think all the will in the world would have stopped him from committing murder.
Justin just shook his head like he was looking for the right words to say and I knew the argument was far from over. Or was it?
"I...I..." Justin spluttered out the words like he had them stuck in the back of his throat.
"What?" I said with my hands on my hips, but then it didn"t take me long to realise something was wrong...very wrong.
"I...I...I"m going be sick!" He said before bending over double and dropping to the floor.
"Justin!" I shouted before rushing back to his side.
It was as if his limbs had turned to mush but it didn"t stop him from shaking. He was red hot to touch and I tried to sooth his back while he vomited into the undergrowth. His back would arch every time his body wanted to bring some more up but his stomach was quickly emptied, leaving him with nothing but bile to excrete. Finally he stopped long enough to look at me but it was like he couldn"t find me there in his sight. That"s when I noticed the black clouds that had covered his entire eyes. He put his hands out, like searching for something in the dark, but there was enough light from the porch lamp and moon to see clearly.
"Keira...Keira where are you?" That"s when my heart froze.
He was now blind.
Chapter 32.
Heavy in My Arms I was trying not to panic but every time I looked down and saw the picture of Justin shaking and grasping out at a world he could no longer see, then it was hard not to start screaming. I wanted to call out for help but what good would that do? This wasn"t something doctors could help with and I was too ashamed to call for Frank. Justin had been my responsibility and I had let my PIG HEADED boyfriend do this to him! And speaking of Demons, where was Ragnar all of a sudden? He hadn"t left my side once since being "a.s.signed" to me but now he was nowhere to be seen.
That"s when other worries entered my head and the memory of the blood red words started to burn back from my subconscious. What if we were both in greater danger? What if Draven hadn"t done this to Justin? That is when I knew I had to move. I had to get us both inside as quickly as I could.
I grabbed Justin under his arm and tried to pull him up but it was like dragging a sack of manikins around.
"Come on Justin, we have to get inside." He groaned but my words must have taken some effect because he started to support himself to a degree. I hooked his arm around my neck to hold most of his weight but my legs must have started to buckle because it gave him the extra strength to hold himself upright. I held onto his waist band for extra grip, which couldn"t have been very comfortable for him but considering the circ.u.mstances, I think that having a wedgie was the least of his problems.
We staggered over to the steps when the porch light started to flicker.
"Justin, come on...we have to move faster, we"re nearly there!" I couldn"t keep the urgency out of my voice and he knew it. He started to mount the steps two at a time and I fumbled around my pocket for the keys...s.h.i.t the KEYS! I had left them in the truck!
"Justin you will have to wait here, I need to get the keys." I let him go and it was only then when I realised how much of my body weight he had been relying on, as he sacked it to the floor with a loud, creaking thud.
He looked exhausted and I wished that I could somehow have transported some of my overdrive adrenaline into him.
I ran as fast as my legs could take me but just before I reached for the handle I stopped. My mind flooded with different scenarios. Could someone be watching me...waiting for a moment like this? I looked round nervously and found myself praying to see my giant guardian watching over me but instead my eyes met an eerie darkness, layered with a heavy haze of fog. I swallowed hard and opened the door which made me jump at the new sound. I was that on edge that my muscles ached from being tensed for so long.
My keys dangled still in the ignition and I kept telling myself not to look at my nightmare written on the opposite window but in the end I failed. The words were still there creating the need for my stomach to heave but somehow they looked different, like they were melting into new words. They followed an invisible path on the freezing gla.s.s and came to a stop when the very last drop formed the end of Draven"s name.
TELL DRAVEN.
I stared at my window, holding my breath in waiting. I don"t know how I knew but I was certain this wasn"t the end of the message. I wanted to prompt it on somehow, like I wasn"t just connecting to an inanimate object, but more like it had been possessed.
"Tell Draven what?" My voice shook like my body was reacting from the freezing weather but I felt no cold. That"s when it felt like the heavens were the ones to answer me. With a flash of light the clouds opened and released their floods to the earth, drenching every inch of my clothing in seconds. I looked away from the window and up to the pouring sky, in hopes of some sort of sign. However, it was when I looked back at the window that I found my answer.
EVERYTHING!.
The rain had wiped most of the window clean but left bits that made up this word. Then I screamed as the window burst into a thousand pieces. It was like a firework going off and my car filled with tiny deadly shards. Thankfully I was smart enough to cover my face but one little piece must have slipped through because I felt a stinging to one side of my cheek. I could feel the warm blood trickle down my bitter cold skin and when I touched it there, I found a small shard imbedded. I pulled it out and rubbed the blood away with my sleeve.
I felt like time was standing still, like it does in the dream world. I was seeing things that weren"t real. The rain from the sky was falling in slow motion, slow enough for me to catch individual droplets like falling tears. I had an image of Heaven crying and I was the only one that knew what was happening.
I don"t know how long I stood there, motionless in my own living dreams but when the next thunder erupted it brought me around enough to move. I grabbed the keys and looked at what remained of the window one last time. And one last time was all it took.
There, in the darkness, standing out like a beacon of h.e.l.l were two red, glowing eyes staring back from the woods, watching this whole scene play out like a cat and mouse. I was the mouse. And being so, I ran as fast as any sane mouse would have done. I held onto the keys like a lifeline and flung myself at the door with heavy impact.
By the sound of my freaked state Justin was encouraged to move as well and in the end all I had to do was drag him in the right direction and pull him through the door. I slammed the door shut, not caring about who I would wakeup but more concerned as to who I would be keeping out! I leant on the inside of the door and let my body slip down to the tiled floor. I joined Justin"s side and let my head rest on his shoulder. He too was panting and my head moved up and down with his anxiety.
"What was it? Why is this happening?" He whispered like the thing outside would still be there to hear us.
"I don"t know why but I will find out." What else could I say? Tell him that this could be the doings of Demons, rogue Angels, Vampires or even my boyfriend, the Supernatural King. What were next, Pixies, Elves and Goblins?! I didn"t know if I could cope with anything else, I think at this point if I met Santa I would have run screaming to the hills!
I needed to focus, but all my mind wanted to do was panic. I wanted to curl up into a little ball and cry but something deep within me told me not to bother. I was strong enough for all of this. Like I was born to tame the horrors in my life and conquer them. So with this in mind, I stood up and pulled Justin up with me.
He didn"t ask questions but he just complied and let me drag him up the stairs. He rested his arm around my shoulders and leaned in as much weight as I could stand as we took each step at a time. Every now and again we had to stop to both catch our breaths but by the time we got to his room I had to lean him fully against the door frame to get it open. It took me by surprise as it flung back and hit the wall, making the hinges rattle with the force. I was taken off balance and fell forward.
Justin knew we were outside his room and with one last burst of energy pushed both of us into his room, making us land on his bed. Now here I was lying under him, with both our chests rising in rhythm together. I shifted under his weight making him speak.
"Keira, wait!" His voice was urgent, but both soft and sour.