"I would like to reveal many unknown details about the past which will give you a clear understanding of the person Neil is and was."Ah Hai had come here with the sole purpose of talking to Mi Rae.When his sister in lw had told him about Neil getting in a relations.h.i.+p,he had felt a gamut of emotions from hapiness,shocked to finally nervousness.Long ago he had done something that had truly hurt his brother.He knew Neil never blamed him for it.Maybe if Neil had,his guilt would have lessened and he would have been able to receive his punishment..But still he was determined to reveal his wrongdoings to Neil"s girlfriend so that she would understand his brother better.
After his announcement of his intention to tell her about the past there was silence in the car.Mi Rae was curious but at the same time felt it would inappropriate of her to pry into Neil"s past like that.Thinking this through,she finally said,"Ah Hai,I thank you for your kind intenions.But if there is anything from the past that I should know then it must be Neil who must tell me.Even in the past I took Alicia"s help because I was desperate to be closer to him.But if it is something that Neil would rather not tell me then I would like to respect that."
Ah Hai smiled at than and thought to himself,"Elder sister in law was right.She was a good match for his second brother.Add in the pact that though she was curious,she srill refused made him respect her even more..Ah Hai parked the car and saying nothing just came to the pa.s.sanger seat to escort her inside.Once they were settled inside the VIP room,Mi Rae thought to thank Ah Hai for saving her as well but before she could say that Ah Hai continued,"I thank you for thinking of my brother"s feelings even though you were curious.I have come here today to reveal a past that connects us somehow and it is not that he wouldn"t want you to know but more because he would like to protect me.You know that is how he is.But you are the one who has his heart and thus you are the one who can soothe his wounds...the ones I have given him.."
Mi Rae was stunned at this.."the ones I have given him.."This line echoed in her head a fewtimes and she was at a loss of words.Her brows furrowed as she remembered that Alicia had mentioned something about Ah Hai being sick at that time and Neil had been busy taking care of his brother which had led Ning Ning to feel more ignored than ususal.Bt was there more to the story?She didn"t think but maybe there was..
Ah Haistared at Mi Rae intensely and could guess what she was thinking so without waiting for her to reach a decision or not,he said,"I was around 15 years when I made the biggest mistake of my life.Drugs.I was an easy target for the peddlers.Rich boy,no parents.Big brothers struggling to keep up their work.Ryu,Neil and Matt never let me feel as if I was a burden to them but I was.NEil had to manage his studies,work wih Ryu and then come home to care for me.Ryu had to handle all those people against him in the business as well as come home to prepare meals for his younger brothers.Matt had to give up his friends and stay at home to baby sit.They never let me feel as if I was a burden but I did.With hindsight I understand that everything they did was also what gave them happiness and was not just a duty or a ch.o.r.e..but at 15 years when you are ready to stand against everyone..I hated myself.I hated my parents for abandoning me to the care of 3 boys.And I hated my brothers for caring for me without protest and loving me unconditionally.I wanted to escape the guilt of holding back my brothers and I wanted them to be free of me.So even as I understood the effect the drugs would have on me,I started to take them.And slowly I started to enjoy them.They made me forget that I was a burden.Forget that I had no parents.They also made me forget that my brothers loved me."
"I was very careful not to let my brothers know of this new hobby.I pretended to go out with friends and sometimes I pretended to study late into the night.And as if the fates wanted me to suffer,it was a chaotic time for my brothers.Somebody was trying to take over the business and Ryu got busier there,Neil and Ning Ning were having problems and Matt was struggling with his creativity.Inthis chaos,they could not pay attention to their younger brother who was going astray.Ning Ning was once a good friend to me.We had drifted apart when she broke up with Neil but we became friends again when they reconciled.And that was my biggest weakness.In order to hurt myself I did not realize that I was going to inflict the biggest hurt on my brother..."