Gunning.
And one"s happiness once found is worth fighting for?
Mrs. Parbury.
[Firmly.] Worth fighting very hard for!
Gunning.
[Drily.] Of course. [Aside.] Poor Burleigh!
[Lights cigarette.
Mrs. Parbury.
You, I suppose, have never met a woman who could make you happy?
Gunning.
I have never met a woman whom I was sure of being able to make happy.
Mrs. Parbury.
[Slightly embarra.s.sed.] Oh!
Gunning.
And, anyway, the state of marriage has always appeared to me to be a state of warfare.
Mrs. Parbury.
Mr. Gunning, you little know-- Gunning.
I admit the case of you and Clement to be an exceptional one. I"m talking of ordinary cases-the average marriage; there you will find, according to my observation, an endless war-a war of self-interests, a war of opposing emotions, a war of irreconcilable nervous organisations-- Mrs. Parbury.
Oh, Mr. Gunning!
Gunning.
Viewed from the hill-tops rather a pitiful sort of war, in which can be won neither the full joys of love nor the complete glories of battle.
Mrs. Parbury.
Oh, Mr. Gunning!
Gunning.
I remain single, Mrs. Parbury, quite without happiness-except in the reflection that I am neither an oppressor exercising a daily tyranny, nor a slave rightly struggling to be free.
Mrs. Parbury.
Of course I don"t in the least agree with you. [The telephone bell rings.] [Rising.] There"s some one on the telephone-forgive me. [Goes to telephone box and puts the communicator to her ear.] Are you there?-yes-who are you?-the article-yes-no, you can"t have it to-day-no, it hasn"t a million to one chance of being finished. [To Gunning, with a smile.] That"s Clement"s slang, not mine. [Again into telephone.] What?
Enter Parbury and Miss Woodward, R.
I say it hasn"t a million to one chance of being finished.
Parbury.
What? Who is it?
Mrs. Parbury.
It"s the Sat.u.r.day Sentinel.
Parbury.
But, my dear, the article is finished. [Rushes to telephone.] [Miss Woodward and Gunning are laughing secretly. Mrs. Parbury stands C., rather confused.] [At telephone.] Hullo! Hullo! Are you there? [Rings violently.] Hullo-oh! is that you, Jackson? . . . what"s the matter? [Rather a long pause. He smiles while listening.] No, no, not at all, my dear chap. What was said was, It"s a million to one you"ll have the copy in half-an-hour"-eh?-yes, those were the very words . . . no, quite a mistake, you don"t listen properly. A messenger has just gone off in a cab with it. What? Yes. [Laughs.] All right! Good-bye!
Mrs. Parbury.
[Seeing Miss Woodward laughing.] I really don"t know what there is to laugh at, Miss Woodward.
Miss Woodward.
I was only smiling at the messenger in the cab.
[Folds MS. and puts it in envelope.
Parbury.
Yes, send some one at once, please, Miss Woodward.
[Exit Miss Woodward, R.V.E.
Mrs. Parbury.
It wasn"t my fault, dear. You know you did use those words.
Parbury.
My fault entirely. [Aside to Gunning.] Have you told her?
Gunning.
What?
Parbury.
About the yachting?
Gunning.
Why, of course not. That"s your affair, my dear fellow.
Parbury.
[His hand on Gunning"s shoulder.] Mabel, dear, we"re going yachting for a few days. I think I want a little change.
Mrs. Parbury.
[Coming towards them, brightly.] Oh, what a good idea! When do we go? [Parbury and Gunning look at each other.] Are you coming, Mr. Gunning?
[Parbury presses Gunning forward. Gunning looks round at Parbury reproachfully. Parbury goes up stage.
Gunning.
[Embarra.s.sed.] Well, it"s my yacht, Mrs. Parbury, but she"s very small-only a little tub of a thing; and- [Looks at his watch.] By Jove! I"ll never be able to dress and get back for dinner if I don"t hurry. [Gets his hat and gloves, L. Goes up quickly.] I need only say au revoir; don"t trouble, Clement, I"ll find my way out-au revoir!
[Exit Gunning, L.
[Mrs. Parbury, who is puzzled, sits on sofa.
Parbury.
[Calling after Gunning.] Dinner at eight, remember.
Gunning.
[Outside.] All right!
Parbury.
[Shuts the door.] Capital fellow, George Gunning!
[Comes to back of sofa.
Mrs. Parbury.
What does he mean by a little tub of a thing? Surely we"re not-- Parbury.
No, dear, certainly not. You"re quite right. I wouldn"t think of letting you run any risks.
Mrs. Parbury.
Then we"re not going?
Parbury.
No, dear; that is to say, Gunning and I are going.
Mrs. Parbury.
[Rising, aghast.] Without me?
Parbury.
Only for a few days, of course.
[Laughing feebly.
Mrs. Parbury.
You are not serious?
Parbury.
Quite!
[His laugh becomes feebler.
Mrs. Parbury.
But-but you never go away without me!
Parbury.
I haven"t hitherto, but-- Mrs. Parbury.
Well?
[Appears about to cry.
Parbury.
I"ve been working very hard, you know, lately. I feel I want a change.
Mrs. Parbury.
[Tearfully.] It doesn"t occur to you that I might want a change.
Parbury.
Well, have one, dear. Aunt Martha would be delighted to have you at Oaklands.
Mrs. Parbury.
I don"t want to go to Aunt Martha. How would you like to go to Aunt Martha?