But Mysie did not answer just then, and they both turned and pa.s.sed into the grove, walking separately, as if afraid of each other"s touch, and something repellent keeping them apart.
They sat down, carefully avoiding the place where they had sat on that other fateful occasion, nearly a month before, and a long silence elapsed before words were again spoken.
"Now, Mysie," said Peter at last breaking the silence, and bracing himself to hear unpleasant news, "I want to know what is wrong. What is the matter?" and he feared to hear her tell her trouble.
But again only tears--tears and sobs, terrible in their intensity as if the frail little body would break completely under the strain of her grief.
"Mysie," he said, and his voice had a note of tender anxiety in it, "what is it, dear? Tell me."
"You shouldn"t need to ask," she replied between her sobs. "You shouldn"t need to ask when you should ken."
Again a long silence, and Peter felt he had got a heavy blow. A sickening feeling of shame smote his heart at the knowledge hinted at--a knowledge he had feared to learn.
"Is it--is it--am I the cause of it, Mysie? Is--is it--?" and his voice was hoa.r.s.e and dry and pained.
She nodded, and Peter knew beyond all doubt that he was the cause of the misery.
Again a long silence fell between them, in which both seemed to live an eternity of silence and pain. Then clearing his throat, Peter spoke.
"Mysie," he said, "there is only one thing to be done then," and there was decision in his voice and a desire which meant that he was going to rise to a height to which neither he nor Mysie ever expected he would rise. "We must get married."
She looked at him, with eyes still wet, but searching his face keenly.
"Ay. It"s a" richt sayin" that now, efter the thing"s done," she said bitterly.
"But it is the only thing, Mysie, that can be done," he replied quickly.
"I can"t think of anything else."
"You should hae thought aboot that afore. It"s nae use now," she said bluntly.
"Why, Mysie," he asked in surprise. "Why is it no use? Wouldn"t you like to marry me?"
"No," she replied firmly. "I would not! Do you think I have no thought o" mysel"? If nothing had happened, you would never hae thought aboot me for your wife. But now that you"ve done something you canna get oot o"
you"d like to mak" me believe you want to help me bear the disgrace, while a" the time you don"t want to. But it"s no" my disgrace," and there was heat creeping into her voice. "It is yours, an" you should hae thocht aboot a" that afore," and her voice was very angry as she finished.
"You are wrong, Mysie," he replied mollifyingly. "I love, you and I told you that before it happened, and I also hinted that I wanted to marry you."
"Ay, but that was just at the time. Maybe if nothing had happened, an" I had never been in your company again, you"d soon hae forgotten."
"No, Mysie, you are wrong. I love you, and I"ve brought you to this, for which I am sorry, so we must be married," he said decisively.
"Why?" she asked, and her eyes met his honestly and fairly.
"Because it is the right thing to do," he replied quietly.
"Is that a"?" she asked.
"Is it not enough? What else is there to do?" Mysie was silent, and after a while Peter went on;--"It is a duty, dear, but I am going to face it, and shoulder the responsibility. It is the right thing to do, and it must be done."
"Ay, an" you are gaun to dae it, just as a bairn tak"s medicine; because you are forced. I asked if that was a", and it seems to be. But what if I don"t have onything mair to dae with you?"
"You would not do that, Mysie," he said hurriedly, and incredulously. It had never entered his mind that she would refuse to marry him, and he looked upon his offer as a great service which he was doing her. "Why, what could you do otherwise?" he asked looking blankly at her.
"I could work as I hae always done," she said sharply. "You surely think you are a catch. Man, efter what has happened I feel that I wudna care than I never saw you again. You hae little o" rale manliness in you. You thocht it was gran" to carry on wi" a workin" la.s.sie, maybe," and there was bitter scorn in her voice, "an" now when you hae landed yourself into a mess you are grinning like a bear with the branks an" wantin" to dae what is richt as you call it," and Mysie was now really in a temper.
"Mysie, you must not speak like that," he broke in, in earnest tones.
"You know I love you, and loving you as I do, I want to shield you as much--"
"Ay, but you want to shield yourself first," she said.
"No, dear, it is only of you I am thinking. I love you very much and want to do what is right. Even although this had not happened, I was going to ask you to be my wife. Will you marry me, Mysie?"
"What"ll your folks say?" she asked bluntly. "You ken that I"m no" the wife you would have gotten nor the yin your folk would like you to get,"
she said, searching his face with a keen look. "I"m no" born in your cla.s.s. I"m ignorant an" have not the fine manners your wife should have, an" I doot neither your faither nor your mither wad consent to such a thing."
"But I won"t ask them," he replied. "I am a man for myself, and do not see why they should be asked to approve my actions in this."
"Ay, that"s a" richt; but what aboot your ain feelings in the matter?
Am I the la.s.s you wad hae ta"en, Peter, if this hadna happened?" and there was a world of hungry appeal in her voice as she finished. It was as if she wanted to be a.s.sured that it was for herself alone that he really wanted to marry her.
"Why should you not?" he enquired.
"That"s no" the question," she said, noting the evasion. "You ken as weel as I dae that it wad be an ill match for you. You"ve been brought up differently. You"ve had eddication, an" an easy life. You"ve been trained faur differently, an" you canna say that you"d no" tire o" me. I have not as muckle learning as wad make me spell my ain name, an" I could never fill the position o" your wife with the folk I"d have to mix with."
"That"s all right, Mysie," he said, ready to counter her argument. "You have not been educated, that is true, but it is only a question of having you trained. If one woman can be educated and trained so can another. This is what I propose to do: I go back to Edinburgh in a fortnight to finish my last year. My father has put the colliery into a company, and he has a large part of the management on his shoulders. He expects when I come home next year to gradually retire. I shall be the controlling power then, and he will slip out of the business and end his days in leisure."
"Ay, but you are thinking a" the time aboot the disgrace," she said.
"Your whole thought is about your position, an" you hae never a real thought aboot me." She was somewhat mollified; but there was still a hard note in her voice, and not a little distrust too. "Are you sure you are no" proposin" this just because o" the trouble? I don"t want peety!
I am pairtly to blame too," this with a softer note creeping into her voice, and making it more resigned. "If it"s no" oot o" peety for me, I could bear it better. But I"ll no" hae peety. I can look after mysel"
an" face the whole thing, even though I ken it"ll break my mither"s heart."
"I know what it is for you, Mysie," he said. "I am trying to look at the whole thing from your point of view. That"s why I have planned to give you some sort of a training, and make it as easy for you as possible. It is for your position I am worrying and when I come into my father"s place I will be able to put all things right for you, and make you really happy."
"But you have not faced the main bit yet," she said as he ceased speaking. "Where do I come in? You hae got this to face now, an" it"ll no" wait a" that time."
"Yes, I know," he replied, "I"m just coming to that. At first it won"t perhaps look too nice to you, but remember, Mysie, I want to face the matter honestly and you"ll have to help me. Very well," he went on. "As I said, I go back to Edinburgh in three weeks at most--I"ll try and go in a fortnight, and you must go with me--not traveling together. We must keep all our affairs to ourselves, and not even your parents or mine must know. When I go away you"ll come the day after. You can travel over the moor to Greyrigg station, take the 4:30 train from there and I can meet you at Edinburgh. I"ll get a house next week when I go to arrange for my term. I shall tell no one. You can live in the house I get and I can continue perhaps in lodgings, and I shall come and visit you as often as I can."
He stopped for a little and then resumed:--"I shall buy books for you and come and teach you the things you"ll need to learn, or I can get someone to do it, if you"d like that better. Then when you are thoroughly trained, I can bring you home to Rundell House and all will be well."
"An" what aboot--what aboot--" she paused, averting her face. "Are you no" forgettin" that it"ll tak" a lang time for me to learn a" I"ll need; for I"m gey ill to learn."
"No, Mysie," he replied rea.s.suringly. "When you arrive in Edinburgh, we can go next day to be married before the Sheriff. It"s all right, Mysie dear," he a.s.sured her as he saw the questioning look in her eyes. "Don"t think I"m trying to trap you. I want to make what amends I can for what has happened. You"ll be my wife just as surely as if the minister married us. If you are not content with that we can easily get married with a minister after we decide to come back here."
"But wad that be a true marriage?" she asked, scarcely able to credit what he told her. "Wad I get marriage lines?"
"Oh, yes. It would be legal, and you"d get marriage lines. Now what do you say?"
"I dinna like the thocht o" no" tellin" my mither. Will I hae to gang away, an" no" tell her?"