"Yes; it was bad enough to make any one look sad, wasn"t it? But it was curious all the same----"
"I didn"t mean the badness."
"Nor did I. It was odd. There was atmosphere in spite of everything."
"I thought you were too occupied to notice the performance," Tom hinted.
Tony laughed good-naturedly. "I was a bit taken up, I admit," he said.
"But there was something curious all the same. I kept seeing you and our hostess on the stage----"
"In Egypt!"
"In a way, yes." He hesitated.
"Odd," said his cousin briefly.
"Very. It seemed--there was some one else who ought to have been there as well as you two. Only he never came on."
Tom made no comment. Was this thought-transference, he wondered?
The natural sympathy between them furnished the requisite conditions certainly.
"He never came on," continued Tony, "and I had the queer feeling that he was being kept off on purpose, that he was busy with something else, but that the moment he came on the play would get good and interesting--real.
Something would happen. And it was then I noticed Madame Jaretzka----"
"And me, too, I suppose," Tom put in, half amused, half serious.
There was an excited yet uneasy feeling in him.
"Chiefly her, I think. And she looked so sad,--it struck me suddenly.
D"you know, Tom," he went on more earnestly, "it was really quite curious.
I got the feeling that we three were watching that play together from above it somewhere, looking down on it--sort of from a height above----"
"Above," exclaimed his cousin. There was surprise in him--surprise at himself. That faint uneasiness increased. He realised that to confide in Tony was impossible. But why?
"H"m," Tony went on in a reflective way as if half to himself. "I may have seen it before and forgotten it." Then he looked up at his cousin.
"And what"s more--that we three, as we watched it, knew the same thing together--knew that we were waiting for another chap to come on, and that when he came the silly piece would turn suddenly interesting, dramatic in a true sense, only tragedy instead of comedy. Did _you_, Tom?" he asked abruptly, s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g up his eyes and looking quite serious a moment.
Tom had no answer ready, but his cousin left no time for answering.
"And the fact is," he continued, lowering his voice, "I had the feeling the other chap we were waiting for was _him_."
Tom was too interested to smile at the grammar. "You mean--her husband?"
he said quietly. He did not like the turn the talk had taken; it pleased him to talk of her, but he disliked to bring the absent husband in.
There was trouble in him as he listened.
"Possibly it was," he added a trifle stiffly. Then, ashamed of his feeling towards his imaginative cousin, he changed his manner quickly.
He went up and stood behind him by the open window. "Tony, old boy, we"re together somehow in this thing," he began impulsively; "I"m sure of it."
Then the words stuck. "If ever I want your help----"
"Rather, Tom," said the other with enthusiasm, yet puzzled, turning with an earnest expression in his frank blue eyes. In another moment, like two boys swearing eternal friendship, they would have shaken hands. Tom again felt the impulse to make the confidences that desire for sympathy prompted, and again realised that it was difficult, yet that he would accomplish it. Indeed, he was on the point of doing so, relieving his mind of the childhood story, the acc.u.mulated details of Wave and Whiff and Sound and Eyes, the singular Montreux meeting, the strange medley of joy and uneasiness as well, all in fact without reserve--when a voice from the lawn came floating into the room and broke the spell. It lifted him sharply to another plane. He felt glad suddenly that he had not spoken-- afterwards, he felt very glad. It was not right in regard to her, he realised.
"You"re never ready, you boys," their hostess was saying, "and Miss Monnigan declares that men always wait to be fetched. The lunch-baskets are all in, and the motor"s waiting."
"We didn"t want to be in the way," cried Tony gaily, ever ready with an answer first. "We"re both so big and clumsy. But we"ll make the fire in the woods and do the work that requires mere strength without skill all right." He leaped out of the window to join them, while Tom went by the door to fetch his cap and overcoat. Turning an instant he saw the three figures on the lawn standing in the sunlight, Madame Jaretzka with a loose, rough motor-coat over her white dress, a rose at her throat and the long blue veil he loved wound round her hair and face. He saw her eyes look up at Tony and heard her chiding him. "You"ve been talking mischief in there together," she was saying laughingly, giving him a searching glance in play, though the tone had meaning in it. "We were talking of you," swore Tony, "and you," he added, turning by way of polite after-thought to the girl. And one of his big hands he laid for a moment upon Madame Jaretzka"s arm.
Tom turned sharply and hurried on into the hall. The first thought in his mind was how tender and gentle Madame Jaretzka looked standing in the sunshine, her eyes turned up at Tony. His second thought was vaguer: he felt glad that Tony admired and liked her so. The third was vaguer still: Tony didn"t really care for the girl a bit and was only amusing himself with her, but Madame Jaretzka would protect her and see that no harm came of it. She could protect the whole world. That was her genius.
In a moment these three thoughts flashed through him, but while the last two vanished as quickly as they came, the first lingered like sunlight in him. It remained and grew and filled his heart, and all that day it kept close by him--her love, her comfort, her mothering compa.s.sion.
And Tom felt glad for some reason that his confidences to Tony after all had been interrupted and prevented. They remained thus interrupted and prevented until the end, even when the "other" came upon the scene, and above all while that "other" stayed. It all seemed curiously inevitable.
CHAPTER XII
The last few weeks of September they were much alone together, for Mrs.
Haughstone had gone back to her husband"s tiny house at Kew, Molly to the Dresden school, and Tony somewhere into s.p.a.ce--northern Russia, he said, to watch the birds beginning to leave.
Meanwhile, with deepening of friendship, and experiences whose ordinariness was raised into significance because this woman shared them with him, Tom saw the summer fade in England and usher in the longer evenings. Light and heat waned from the sighing year; winds, charged with the memory of roses, took the paling skies; the swallows whispered together of the southern tour. New stars swam into their autumnal places, and the Milky Way came majestically to its own. He watched the curve of it on moonless nights, pouring its grand river across the heavens. And in the heart of its soft brilliance he saw Cygnus, cruciform and shining, immersed in the white foam of the arching wave.
He noticed these things now, as once long ago in early boyhood, because a time of separation was at hand. His yearning now was akin to his yearning then--it left a chasm in his soul that beauty alone could help to fill.
At fifteen he was thirty-five, as now at thirty-five he was fifteen again.
Lettice was not, indeed, at a Finishing School across the Channel, but she was shortly going to Warsaw to spend October with her husband, and in November she was to sail for Egypt from Trieste. Tom was to follow in December, so a separation of three months was close at hand. "But a necessary separation," she said one evening as they motored home beneath the stars, "is always bearable and strengthening; we shall both be occupied with things that must--I mean, things we ought to do. It"s the needless separations that are hard to bear." He replied that it would be wonderful meeting again and pretending they were strangers. He tried to share her mood, her point of view with honesty. "Yes," she answered, "only that wouldn"t be quite true, because you and I can never be separated--really. The curve of the earth may hide us from each other"s sight like that,"--and she pointed to the sinking moon--"but we feel the pull just the same."
They leaned back among the cushions, sharing the mysterious beauty of the night-sky in their hearts. They lowered their voices as though the hush upon the world demanded it. The little things they said seemed suddenly to possess a significance they could not account for quite and yet admitted.
He told her that the Milky Way was at its best these coming months, and that Cygnus would be always visible on clear nights. "We"ll look at that and remember," he said half playfully. "The astronomers say the Milky Way is the very ground-plan of the Universe. So we all come out of it.
And you"re Cygnus." She called him sentimental, and he admitted that perhaps he was. "I don"t like this separation," he said bluntly. In his mind he was thinking that the Milky Way had his wave in it, and that its wondrous arch, like his life and hers, rose out of the "sea" below the world. In that sea no separation was possible.
"But it"s not that that makes you suddenly poetic, Tom. It"s something else."
"Is it?" he answered. A whisper of pain went past him across the night.
He felt something coming; he was convinced she felt it too. But he could not name it.
"The Milky Way is a stream as well as a wave. You say it rises in the autumn----?" She leaned nearer to him a little.
"But it"s seen at its best a little later--in the winter, I believe."
"We shall be in Egypt then," she mentioned. He could have sworn she would say those very words.
"Egypt," he repeated slowly. "Yes--in Egypt."
And a little shiver came over him, so slight, so quickly gone again, that he hoped it was imperceptible. Yet she had noticed it.
"Why, Tom, don"t you like the idea?"