h.e.l.lo? Is that how Eva started hers?Well, whatever. The world"s gonna end anyway so who cares if someone"s gonna read these random pieces of paper that I"m probably gonna throw away
Oh wait, that was a run-on, that composition book said you shouldn"t do that because it makes your sentences harder to understand. Pft, it probably doesn"t matter.
Anyway, I write this... I dunno, entry to scribble down my thoughts before I lose them. Just like I always do.
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So, I"ve been thinking about something lately.
Cole is weird.
Like super weird. Sometimes I wonder what"s going on through his head. The doc.u.mentaries I"ve watched about him only showed his achievements and stuff. Now that I think about it, why were there so many of them?
Ah, oops. I"m sidetracking.
But the reason I think so is that there are times where he stares long into the pages of a book, lost in thought. He does the same sometimes to Eva and me.
Another thing is that he told me that he can"t really feel positive emotions much but whenever he eats food, his face easily brightens. To be honest, his expressions at the time are so cute that I have to force myself not to pinch my cheeks.
But maybe he meant that he couldn"t feel positive emotions towards people.
After all, they"re a slimy, greedy, l.u.s.tful, and hateful bunch. Well, of course, that includes me. And Cole. And Val. And Lala And Eva.
Don"t you dare say that she"s just a child! Everyone grows up to have some sort of ugly part of them. But I don"t think that"s necessarily bad. After all, it"s part of what makes someone human.
Anyway, that brings me to my final point of him being weird.
He isn"t avoiding the battlefield.
When he got a mission to go to the〈Huaxia Zone〉, he didn"t refuse it. Even when he probably knew the possibility of him having to fight again.
When he had told me and Eva about who he was, I was ready to live the calm and peaceful life of a family maid. He had already told that emissary from〈S.T.E.L.L.A〉about his plans to do so. But he ended up accepting the job offer anyway.
To be honest, I was worried about him.
I thought that it was possible that he might have developed PTSD. I knew that the possibility was nowhere near zero. So, when I saw him fight the few times on our journey, I had to admit.
He looked like he was right at home.
Even when they were just random bandits, he hadn"t hesitated to cut them down. But his face wasn"t bothered in the least, it showed that he was all too used to doing stuff like that.
...
It made me think about what all the doc.u.mentaries said about his achievements. The first time he went to battle was when he was 14. And that was also the age his mother died. I wondered what thoughts he might have had back then.
Was he grief-stricken and merely went to forget all of that? To throw it all away? Or did he not care a single bit about her?
I even wondered how he got permission to enter the battlefield at such a young age.
So, to make sure he doesn"t completely turn cold. I accepted his sudden proposal. To make him fall in love with me. My only problem is that he"s part ice cube and most of my plans of romancing him were made for tsundere or innocent types.
Well, I"ll find a way.
Ah, before I forget, I should get him a pet.
Animal therapy might be good. I don"t know if he really has any problems or not, but just in case.