Never again
Because of that kiss, this week in the evenings Mo Ka did not really fall asleep. This type of feeling is like a young girl feeling lovesick for having tasted love for the first time. At night he would suddenly fall asleep to then open his eyes, he would immediately recall that night, then smile using strength to grab the pillow and fall asleep again. Chen Ge’s appearance made Mo Ka’s world by surprise. [1]
[1] an idiom; no time to deal with it/ caught unprepared.
Everyday he found for himself countless reasons to not like Chen Ge, however even more reasons to like Chen Ge for no reason gushed over from every direction despite how Mo Ka blocks it, still mercilessly be submerged.
He collapsed into the living room sofa, staring at Chen Ge’s phone number on the phone screen, repeatedly consider. This is a contradiction and excruciating people thing. If he calls him right, he’ll disturb Chen Ge and make him hate him; but if don’t call right, the feeling of this empty atmosphere will make people mad.
“Hao Shuai, what are you doing?” Mo Ka asked Hao Shuai who was staying positive in the room.
Of course Hao Shuai would not say he is watching DIY p.o.r.n[2], he made great efforts to stabilise the steady mood: “Not doing anything, if you have something can we talk about it later.”
[2] it lit says 毛片 DIY
“Why can’t we talk now?”
Hao shuai’s hand was busy now, being asked by Mo Ka, he had to stop again: “I have something.” After speaking he continued, after all the trouble came the feeling.
“How do you feel about Chen Ge this person?” Mo Ka completely ignored Hao Shuai’s words.
Hao Shuai was trembling with rage, he intended to ignore Mo Ka.
“I’m asking you.”
Being interrupted several times, Hao Shuai was finally not in the mood, he turned off intense action movie, vigorously opened the bedroom door: “Sometimes I cannot wait to strangle you to seek peace.”
“You eat dynamite, ah you.”
“Yeah, no place to vent, what did you just ask me?”
“I said how is Chen Ge this person?”
Hao Shuai put on an act touching his chin: “You can directly see how this person is with the naked eye, various aspects are outstanding, character is tender, simply charming to perfect.”
Mo Ka quietly listened, Chen Ge isn’t tender towards him, he has no reason to love him right.
“So, you falling for him is excusable, it only shows that your thoughts on women is not strong enough, like me, unshakeable.” Hao Shuai fill this s.e.x bomb’s discourse, making Mo Ka’s mind explode blank. b.u.t.t stood up from the sofa, made supreme efforts to deny: “Who likes him, don’t casually open your mouth talking nonsense. I was just bored so I casually asked you about Chen Ge, I like him? I just ate two meals with him, I like him? I just went out with him once, I like him? I just looked at him more than a few glances, I like him? I, I just want to be nice to him a little, like him? What terrible logic, I need to go to cla.s.s.” These words, Mo Ka said for Hao Shuai to listen, also for himself to listen to.
In the afternoon second cla.s.s, Mo Ka finished using the toilet, he accidentally glanced at the railing, saw Chen Ge and Su Rui together. Mo Ka just saw the side of Chen Ge’s face, and that tenderness that will forever and always do not belong to him. He looked at Su Rui’s beautiful face again, a clump of inferiority from deep and darkest place in the heart crawled out, making him stubbornly bound. Isn’t it just one kiss? Been caused to be confused and disorientated is only himself alone, like a fool, but he himself is a man, and can he be Chen Ge’s sweetheart, also at least need excellence to be sufficient to match him.
What am I? Just a ordinary person, a person whom you will not look at more than once, nothing much. A ordinary person must live their own ordinary life well, if stand in a place I don’t belong, it will be a joke. Even if I like Chen Ge so what, who will believe Chen Ge’s likes me, even I won’t believe it. Furthermore I don’t like Chen Ge, I’m just lonely. Mo Ka thought this, glanced in that direction again, silently returning to the cla.s.sroom.
[T/N we will believe you Mo Ka~]
A person mood can be from top to bottom around someone else, Mo Ka is considered thoroughly experienced to this point. What is the teacher speaking about on stage, Mo Ka was obviously listening seriously, but he didn’t remember it.
“Recently, that freshman Su Rui is really hateful, often see her and Chen Ge together.”
“I seen it several times, unless she is a step ahead.”
“Someone saw them together last week in Christmas Eve.”
“Hateful, will not give my Chen Ge to anyone.”
“Who told her to be pretty, like Chen Ge, having a not pretty figure is bad, can he look at and find it pleasing, you just consider it as bad luck.”
“It really can not resigned to ah, I also want to be together with Chen Ge.”
“Stop spring dreaming.”
The girl who called out Chen Ge that day should be Su Rui, if he didn’t take Wu Qu Yang’s thing to shamelessly make him go play, maybe he and Su Rui will have already had a romantic Christmas. Like this it may be a.s.sumed that, it was himself who always insisted on stating by his side.
Mo Ka’s face laid on the table, arching his body, so sad. Is it not just him and a girl together, why would it be so uncomfortable. Mo Ka’s heart resemble a cramp the same as pulling the whole five organs to twitch endlessly.
For a long time, Mo Ka bitterly laughed all of a sudden. Admit it, this painful feeling is precisely liking him right.
It really is ironic, only recognise this feeling until he sees him together with other girls.
Standing at the basketball court Mo Ka was rather restless, very tired. After this section of physical education cla.s.s he can go home, MonKa only wants to go back to sleep. At this time a basketball flew over straight into his face, the basketball landed. Mo Ka’s nose bleed flowed down a little, girl’s turned around sneering and boy’s chattered.
“Are you kidding me, in the end are you playing or not.”
“Really, always felt that he is a strange person, did you not just see, standing there like a fool waiting for the basketball to hit him.”
“Is it not just being hit by a basketball, come on. Look at his expression, won’t need to call him an ambulance right, so funny.”
[T/N I’m ready to jump into the novel to cut these b.i.t.c.hes.]
Mo Ka rather embarra.s.sed apologised: “Sor, sorry.”
The teacher came over: “Its alright, you don’t need to attend this cla.s.s, quickly go to the infirmity.”
Mo Ka nodded, he left clutching his bleeding nose. He didn’t go to the infamy, he didn’t want to go anywhere, only wanted to go home to sleep, it won’t hurt when sleeping. But G.o.d seemed to think that he was not unlucky enough, he went to the school gate and just b.u.mped into Su Rui and Chen Ge. Mo Ka only hope that Chen Ge didn’t see him now, but hope is just hope nothing more,
“Hey, what’s with your face.” Chen Ge looked at Mo Ka who covered his nose with his hand.
Mo Ka didn’t speak, focused on going, was caught by Chen Ge, reached out wanting to move away Mo Ka’s hand: “Let me see!”
[T/N hubby is concerned about wifey, prepared to beat those b.i.t.c.hes haha]
Mo Ka pushed Chen Ge away: “Leave me alone.”
Chen Ge like this saw Mo Ka’s face, blood still flowing down from his nose nose, Chen Ge’s heart was tight: “Who did it?”
“Why do you care so much about me for, no one likes me anyways. You also don’t need to use fake filled concern for me. I, Mo Ka don’t need your pity.” Mo Ka ran without turning back, running straight ahead, ran until stomach hurt also not wanting to stop. Wasn’t even willing to get the elevator, directly climb the stairs, the 19th floor is a endless distance. At last tired and unable to climb again, Mo Ka found a stair to sit down on.
“Who allowed you run away like this?” Chen Ge’s voice followed and a breath.
Mo Ka was rather surprised Chen Ge could even follow: “You, why did you follow.”
Chen Ge didn’t pay attention to Mo Ka, he caught his hand dragging him upstairs. Mo Ka wanted to shake it off but could not shake it off: “Told you to not care about me.”
“If I don’t care for you, who will.”
[T/N literally died.]
“I don’t need you to care, let me merge and perish.”
“Don’t give Lao Zi this sort of drivel, do you hear.” Chen Ge’s voice was rather miffed. [3]
[3] annoyed
This is the first time Mo Ka saw Chen Ge this fierce. Mo Ka didn’t dare speak, despite being dragged into the bathroom by Chen Ge, cleaning away the blood on his face.
“Put your head up, it will be better in a while,”
“Ok.”
Mo Ka looked up standing in the living room, looking at the ceiling, slowly calming down, contemplating about everything once again. Felt that he wasn’t anything, obviously Chen Ge from start to finish did not do anything wrong, he just doesn’t like him that’s all, he added all his mood onto him, also got angry at him. It was obviously himself who was unable to posses fantasies with him.
“You running here, will Su Rui mind.” Mo Ka cautiously probed.
“Why does it concern her.”
“I. Yep.” Mo Ka stammered not knowing whether he should ask or not.
“Say it have something to say.”
“I heard, you and Su Rui seem to be together.”
“You believe it?”
“Whether I believe or not it doesn’t matter, it’s none of my business anyways.” Mo Ka put on a indifferent att.i.tude.
“Since it doesn’t matter, I do not need to tell you.” Chen Ge’s speech brought a little unhappiness.
Mo Ka laughed, laughed very ugly: “True, your private matters, of course you don’t need to tell me, ha ya. You think I’d really want to hear, then you thought wrong, I’m just standing at a friend’s position to ask nothing more.”
“Sometimes I really don’t know what you are thinking.” After a while a.s.sumed this injured his depression, a while later a nothing had happened look, made Chen Ge at wits end.
“Yeah. What am I thinking!” Mo Ka muttered, then seriously looked at Chen Ge, speech without using his brain blurting: “Maybe I’m thinking, I want to become your most preferred person.”
[T/N Mo Ka is this your confession?]
Seeing Chen Ge expressionless face, Mo Ka hurriedly supplemented a sentence: “I’m joking with you, you’ve been tricked.”
“Told you to put your head up.”
“I know, don’t need to be so loud. I’m not dead.”
Mo Ka looked up again, looking at the ceiling, never speak out those humiliating words again, never expose my fragile feelings in front of you again.
“Does it still hurt?”
Mo Ka shook his head: “The pain has been felt until it doesn’t hurt already.”