I have been misjudged and misunderstood, because cowardly persons have lied and villified me, and have accused me of motives and acts of which I was innocent.
I am well hated now by one person in particular, who blames me for things another is guilty of. A word from me would clear myself, but it would bring gloom and despair to that person and would not make me any more cognizant of my innocence.
[Sidenote: Time, the Arbiter.]
Time somehow will bring out the truth; the cowardly, guilty individual who basks in the favor of the one who is angry at me will surely pay for his wrong. This I know, and I am satisfied with the ultimate result.
My former friend, who is angry at me, would simply switch the anger current to the guilty one if I told the facts; the guilty person couldn"t stand that anger like I can. My act would break up a home and bring misery. The satisfaction I would receive would not equal the sorrow my act would cause to others.
I am far removed from the location where these people live, and I can stand the anger of the one who puts the blame on me by accepting the lies of another as truth.
I have the doc.u.ments in black and white, yet I don"t use them because I have poise and the consciousness of knowing I am right, and those who are dear to me know it, too.
I"ve tried both plans, the plan of anger and the plan of poise, and I like poise better.
I believe I hear more birds, I believe I get more pleasure out of life and living than the man who gets angry and loves revenge.
Anyway, I think so, and "as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he."
39.
Sleeping, like breathing and digesting, is controlled by the subconscious brain centers. Natural sleep requires no positive mental impulse; it"s just relaxing, and nature takes care of the process.
[Sidenote: Can"t Sleep.]
That is natural sleep, but when you start your dry cell battery, the brain, and commence to worry and fear, you are going to stay awake. Then the conscious mind dominates the subconscious mind, and you banish the very comforter you seek to woo.
Business men who work under high tension all day on business matters, and high tension all evening in threshing over again the business of the day, are almost sure to suffer from insomnia.
The continuance of this habit of thinking of business day and night brings on the insomnia habit and that, in turn, gives rise to the delusion that you are fighting for your natural sleep. This produces worry, the demon that kills and maims.
To have an occasional wakeful night is natural; it is an evidence of intelligence: the mental dullard never has wakeful nights.
Unless the fear of sleeplessness becomes a full grown phobia, no anxiety need be felt. The fear of insomnia, the over-anxiety to go to sleep, is to be more dreaded than insomnia itself.
[Sidenote: To Get Results.]
To get refreshing sleep you must put yourself in a state of actual physical tiredness. Take exercise. Walk in one direction until the first symptoms of becoming tired appear, then walk home. Take a hot bath, then sponge with cold or cool water. Put a cold cloth at the head, and rub the backbone with cold water.
Open your windows wide, then relax. Don"t worry; you are going to sleep.
Lie on your back, open your eyes wide, look up as if you were trying to see your eyebrows, hold your eyes open this way ten to twenty seconds, then close them slowly. Repeat this several times.
Sleep will have descended on you before you realize it.
Or occupy your mind with auto-suggestions like this: "I am going to sleep--sound, heavy, restful, peaceful sleep. My eyelids are getting heavy--heavy. I am going to close them and go to sleep."
Don"t try to count imaginary sheep jumping over fence rails. Don"t count numbers. It is a bad habit.
If these suggestions do not help you the first night, say: "All right, my brain was too active; to-morrow I will let down a bit."
Next night eat one or two dry crackers; chew them slowly, masticate them thoroughly until you can swallow easily.
This little food will draw the blood pressure from the brain and help you to go to sleep.
Drive out business and worry thoughts. Think faith and courage thoughts.
40.
To live down the past and erase the errors, live the present boldly.
Do not chastise or condemn yourself for mistakes you have made. You are not alone; everyone has made missteps--has hurt others or wronged himself.
[Sidenote: Making Mistakes.]
Everyone has had reverses and met trouble and misfortune. It"s the plan of things. It is by undergoing trials like these that we gain in experience and wisdom. We are enabled to correct our future acts by utilizing the lessons which our mistakes have taught us.
Yesterday is dead; forget it. Face about. Live to-day; be busy, be active, be intent on doing right and accomplishing things worth while.
The world"s memory is short. A misdeed, an error, a wrongful act on your part may set busy tongues wagging to-day, and you may suffer from calumny and criticism. Of course, your errors will be magnified and your wrongs enlarged beyond the truth; that"s the penalty you pay for your transgressions.
Lies are always added to truth in telling of one"s misdeeds. Be brave.
Weather the storm; it will soon blow over. To-morrow the world will forget.
You"ve suffered in your own conscience; that"s all the debt you can pay on the old score.
[Sidenote: Worrying Won"t Help.]
Now, then, get busy with the glorious opportunity that today presents.
Don"t make the same mistake again. There are no eyes in the back of your head; look forward. Don"t worry by envying the other fellow and comparing his good deeds with your mistakes; you only see his good. He has had troubles and made mistakes, too, but you and the world have forgotten them.
If every man"s sins were printed on his forehead, the crowds that pa.s.s by would all wear their hats over their eyes.
I"m trying to comfort you, and slap you on the back, and tell you that you are just human, and all humans make false steps.
The patriarchs in the Bible made mistakes, but they got in the fold.
History has perpetuated their names. Their lives, on the whole, were worth while. It"s the sum total of acts that count.