Some days, I needed the reminder.
Laura Anne Gilman is the author of the "Cosa Nostradamus" urban fantasy novels (most recently Hard Magic), as well as the mainstream fantasy Weight of Stone: Book 2 of The Vineart War. She lives in New York City, where she also runs d.y.m.k. productions, an editorial consulting company. Her website may be found at www.lauraannegilman.net Danny Hendrickson is a former NYPD officer, currently working as a private investigator in New York City. He likes to keep his half-faun genetics under his hat, so to speak.
The Demon You Know... A Demon-Hunting Soccer Mom Story.
by Julie Kenner.
Kate.
My name is Kate Connor, and I"m a suburban mom with a husband, a teenager, and a toddler. I"m also a demon hunter. And no, I don"t mean that metaphorically. I really do hunt demons from h.e.l.l, although I thankfully don"t have to go to h.e.l.l to do that. Instead, the demons come to me, and more often than I"d like, actually.
Demons, you might know, walk among us all the time. The air is, literally, filled with demonic essence living in the ether, a little fact that, frankly, can creep you out if you think about it too long. What"s even creepier is that a demon"s essence can also inhabit the body of a human. Sometimes the demon possesses the human, in which case you have a whole spinning-head, Linda Blair thing going on. That"s not my area; for that, you call a priest.
More often (because what demon wants to walk around looking like the thing in The Exorcist?), a demon will move into a body at the moment of death, just as the human"s soul is leaving. You"ve heard of those situations where someone is thought to be dead - a fall, a drowning - but then the victim is "miraculously" brought back to life. Most of the time, that"s no miracle. It"s a demon. And one who brings with it strength beyond which the human had in life, and a body that"s pretty dang hard to kill. You want to off a demon, you have to stab it in the eye. Not as easy as it sounds, trust me on that, but pretty much any jab that punctures the sclera and reaches the vitreous humor will do. I"ve used knives, ice picks, barrettes and even Happy Meal toys.
Manage to inflict that injury, and the demonic essence is sucked right back out into the ether.
Of course, demons can"t pop into any old body. The souls of the faithful fight, and the window of opportunity pa.s.ses pretty quickly. So it"s not as if the world is overrun with demons walking around in human sh.e.l.ls. But there are enough to keep me busy, and my fellow demon hunters, too. I work for Forza Scura, a super-secret arm of the Vatican, although I have to confess I haven"t kept the secret quite as hush-hush as I should. My husband knows. My fourteen-year-old daughter Allie knows. My best friend Laura knows.
And it"s quite possible my toddler knows, too, but he isn"t saying.
Not that I"m completely incapable of keeping a secret. I haven"t told the postman or the guy who runs the 7-11 on the corner. And although I know my martial arts instructor is curious about why a thirty-something mother of two can best him on the mat, so far I haven"t succ.u.mbed to a whim and told him. Why? Because I am, more or less, capable of controlling my whims. Because I don"t fly off the handle and do stupid things simply because my friends (or husband, or kids) want me to.
Responsibility.
Now there"s a buzzword. And *prudence". And *common sense."
All qualities that a demon hunter needs to possess. Especially prudence. And clear, level-headed thinking. The ability to act fast in a crisis and not jump into a situation without first doing at least a basic a.s.sessment. All those are tools in a Hunter"s toolbox, and as much as certain fourteen-year-olds might wish it were so, that particular skill set isn"t acquired overnight. Which is why my particular fourteen-year-old, despite making serious strides on the knife-throwing and a.s.s-kicking side of the equation, isn"t yet going on regular patrols with her designated trainer. Namely, me.
A fact that has definitely raised the Teenage Sulk and Whine Meter in our house to Def Con One. And which, in a lovely bit of circular logic, completely justifies my refusal. Because if she was being clear-headed and prudent, she"d know that I was right - and there would be no whining, no angst, no moping about. Of course, when I tried that bit of logic on her, I was immediately a.s.saulted with her standard reply of Mother, in a tone meant to express all sorts of unpleasant things, none of which it"s prudent to say outright to your mom.
So maybe she"s learned a little prudence after all...
I hoped so. Because right then she was in a situation that required the utmost common sense and prudence. And, possibly, a few a.s.s-kicking skills, too.
Right then, my daughter Allie was on a date, or what I considered a date, although Allie swore it was nothing more than a group of friends going to the movies.
The entire lot had piled into my minivan earlier, and I"d driven them to the mall, the plan being to meet some other friends for dinner and a movie before the girls headed off to a sleepover, where another mom would get to deal with a gaggle of hormonally charged girls. The boys, presumably, would go home frustrated.
I remembered the way Jeremy"s fingers had grazed Allie"s back as they"d walked toward the mall entrance, the way Allie had smiled up at him, her lips soft and shiny from liberal applications of lip gloss (probably to make up for the fact that I"d refused to allow any other make-up).
She could call it a friendly movie outing all she wanted to, but I knew it was a date. My childhood might have been atypical, what with growing up in the Forza dorms and spending my Friday nights chasing preternatural vermin through the catacombs of Rome, but I was still a girl, and I"d been around the block more than once.
There are a lot of things that make moms nervous. The first time you leave your baby with a sitter. The first day of kindergarten. And, of course, the first time your daughter battles a demon right in her own backyard.
All those pale in comparison to an unchaperoned date, even one that technically isn"t a date.
I took a sip of coffee and sighed. For the first time in ages I had the house to myself. My daughter was on a date. My husband had taken our toddler to see his parents. But I couldn"t even enjoy the solitude.
Instead, all I could think as I sat in my kitchen, trying hard not to think at all, was that I hoped those talks about prudence and responsibility had gotten through my daughter"s thick skull.
Allie "This is stupid," I shouted, trying to be heard over the music that filled the room and the ba.s.s beat that shook the floor. I held tight to the punch that Jeremy had brought me before sliding back into the throng of Coronado High students that filled the huge mansion"s foyer. "We"re going to get into so much trouble!"
"It"s just a party, Al," Mindy said, leaning close so she didn"t have to yell as loud. "It"s not like we"re doing anything bad." She said "bad" in the kind of voice that suggested backseats and kissing and the kind of stuff I"d never done before. And, honestly, didn"t want to do yet, even though I could talk a good game in the girls" locker room. It wasn"t like I was a prude or anything, but I wasn"t sure I wanted that kind of hormonal rush yet. Besides, I didn"t have the best of luck with boys. The first time I went out with a guy, he turned out to be a demon. The second time he was only a minion, but from my perspective, that was just as bad. Maybe worse. So pardon me if in my almost fifteen years of wisdom, I"m now thinking that maybe I should have my knife-fighting skills honed before I get in the backseat with a boy.
Not that I can explain any of that to Mindy. She doesn"t know my mom"s secret. And she sure doesn"t know that I"m training to be a demon hunter, too.
I took a sip of my punch and almost spit it out. Whatever it had been spiked with tasted nasty. Not that the taste was slowing Mindy down.
"My mom would ground me for a year if she knew I was here, and you know your mom would, too."
She lifted a shoulder. "So?"
I love Mindy, don"t get me wrong, but she"s been kind of a pain lately. Her parents are getting divorced, so Mom says I"m supposed to be patient with her. But I wasn"t entirely sure that meant that I was supposed to let her drag me to forbidden parties.
"You"re not going to have fun if you don"t relax a little," Mindy said. "Honestly, Allie. It"s not like we"re picking up guys on the beach or hitchhiking on the Coast Highway. It"s a party. And everybody we know is here."
I took another sip of my drink, felt my head do a spinning thing, and saw Jeremy smiling at me from across the room. I wasn"t sure I entirely agreed with Mindy"s a.s.sessment, but I had to admit that at the moment the perks were pretty good. Party. Friends. A boy who liked me. And, yeah, I know I had the whole justification thing going about so not needing a boyfriend, and so not wanting to deal with the stress of kisses and bodies and all that hormonal stuff, but at the same time, it"s not like I could just flip a switch and not be fourteen anymore. I was a hormonal mess. I knew it, because not only did my mom spend half her life saying so, but also because I got the only A on our health quiz this semester. Trust me. All fourteen year olds are hormonal messes.
Jeremy made a beeline for me, his smile just shy enough to make my stomach do flip-flops. "Did you miss me?" he said. Like Mindy, he had to lean in close, and his breath tickled my ear. I caught Mindy"s eye as Carson drew her away toward the makeshift dance floor. She wasn"t saying anything, but was making embarra.s.sing "go for it" expressions - embarra.s.sing enough to make me think that already she"d hit the punch bowl once too often.
Right as I was thinking that I needed to cut my best friend off, she stumbled over her own feet, a sure sign she was trashed. Instinctively, I took a step forward, but stopped right away, because someone caught her - and he wasn"t Carson. Instead, he was an absolutely dreamy guy who couldn"t have been more than sixteen years old. The kind of guy you see in magazines advertising deodorant soap, the idea being that if you don"t stink, you can land a guy like that.
"Marlin Wheatley," Jeremy said, leaning close.
I didn"t turn around. How could I, since that would mean I had to stop staring?
"No way is he in his twenties," I whispered, remembering what I"d been told about our host. "He"s got to still be in high school."
Jeremy moved slightly, and I imagined he was shrugging. "Dunno. Guess he"s just one of those guys."
I guessed so. One of those gorgeous, model-perfect, Greek- G.o.d-on-a-mountaintop kind of guys with a fabulous mansion overlooking the ocean, who throws awesome parties with cutting-edge music and tables and tables topped with amazing food and mindblowing drinks. Yeah. One of those guys.
Now, that guy was holding Mindy tight while she regained her balance. But he wasn"t looking at her. Instead, he was looking right at me. There was something so familiar about his eyes. If I wanted to, I really thought I could float away in them.
Except part of me didn"t want to. Part of me thought that would be a very bad idea. There was something about him ... something deep in his eyes...
"Allie!"
I started, the movement breaking eye contact. I"d been thinking something ... worrying about something, and I glanced back at Mindy, but she was upright and holding hands with Carson and everything seemed hunky-dory.
I turned to Jeremy, confused.
"Hey," he said. "Are you okay?"
"I..."
"You got this look. All worried and ... I don"t know." His brow furrowed. "You don"t want to leave, do you?"
That knocked me back to reality. "I thought about it," I admitted. "My mom wouldn"t exactly approve."
As far as Mom knew, the plan had been a movie followed by a sleepover at Parker"s house. (Parker is a girl, so that"s not as risque as it sounds.) The boys, of course, were not invited to that part of the evening.
"Forget this c.r.a.p," Carson had said once we were safe inside the mall. "Tonight"s Marlin Wheatley"s party."
"Who?" I"d asked, and they"d all looked at me like I was from Mars. Turns out, Wheatley"s some rich twenty-something computer bazillionaire who"d moved to the area a few months ago and has been talking up this party for ages.
"Why?"
Jeremy and Parker had looked at each other and shrugged. "Don"t know. Guess he wants to make sure people come."
"But why throw it in the first place?"
"He"s a college drop-out geek. This is probably his way of meeting girls. Who cares, anyway? It"s a party."
I probably could have said something, but I didn"t, and after about thirty minutes, we pulled up in front of the biggest house I"d ever seen. I had no idea where we were, other than that we were on one of the cliffs overlooking the Pacific in a mega-ritzy neighborhood I"d never seen before. Walking to the front door, I could smell the ocean, and the lights of the house seemed magical against the black night sky.
At that one moment, I had absolutely no hesitation about blowing off the movie and sneaking off to a party.
Inside, when I"d smelled the alcohol in the punch and saw the guy I share a lab table with in biology barf into a potted plant, the second thoughts set in.
Still, there was nothing inherently bad about a barfing lab partner, right? Just because he drank too much didn"t mean I would. And I couldn"t deny the biggest, most glaring fact of all - I really liked the way Jeremy was looking at me. If I was a widdle girl who made a phone call to her mommy, would he ever look at me that way again?
"Earth to Allie," he said. "Come on. Don"t do that to me. Tell me you don"t want to leave."
"No," I said, not realizing until that moment that I was certain. "I don"t want to leave."
He pressed his hands over his heart and pretended to swoon. "Saved," he said. "I was expecting a mortal blow."
I laughed, and thought that felt pretty darn nice.
Mom might not think I was ready to make decisions in the field, but we weren"t talking demons here. This was a party. And just because she was a demon hunter didn"t mean she could go in and hijack all of my decisions from me. I was fourteen years old! I was supposed to be going to parties with friends. I"m pretty sure that"s in the rule book somewhere.
"I"m staying," I said again, just because I liked the way it sounded. Then I smiled up at Jeremy. "In fact, I think I want more punch."
"You"re Allie, right?"
I dropped the dipper back into the bowl, splattering the pink liquid onto my shirt, as I looked up to find Marlin smiling at me from the kitchen doorway.
"Sorry," he said silkily. "I didn"t mean to startle you."
"No, you..." I trailed off because, hey, he had startled me. What was the point of denying it?
He nodded toward the bowl. "You like the punch."
"Yes," I lied. Actually, I"d come into the kitchen hoping to find something in the refrigerator to drink instead. I"d lucked out, too. The punch was apparently a mixture of pink lemonade, Sprite, and some unidentifiable alcohol of the wow-is-that-strong variety. I didn"t like it. And so I"d filled my cup to the brim with plain old pink lemonade, and then had gone to the punch bowl to do a color comparison.
Yes, I know I should simply be able to say, "No, I don"t like the punch," or, "Gee, the alcohol in the punch is making my head swim." Instead, I was going to silently lie by carrying around a big cup of my own version of punch. Cowardly, maybe, but it would keep me sober. I might be defying Mom by staying at the party, but getting drunk on top of that? If she found out, I"d be grounded until my wedding night. Which I wouldn"t have, because she"d never let me near a guy again.
A slow grin spread across Marlin"s face, and those odd eyes twinkled as he peered at the clear plastic tumbler filled with pink lemonade that I now held - a tumbler that was about the size of four of the cups that were piled high in the foyer next to the punch bowl. "I think I have a bigger gla.s.s if you"d like."
I lifted my chin and hoped I looked like a high school student defending her right to drink spiked punch. "No thanks. I"ve already had a lot. This is just about perfect."
He moved closer, although his voice seemed to stay very far away. His hand touched my back, and I had the oddest sensation that his fingers were going right through me. I tried to stifle a shiver but didn"t quite manage.
"Problem?" he asked, his voice slick and oily, his breath so minty I had to a.s.sume he wasn"t drinking the punch.
"Cold punch," I said. "Brain freeze."
"Ah." He put pressure on my back, and like a dutiful puppy, I moved forward. "I was looking for you. Mindy and Carson and Jeremy joined me in the study along with a few more of your friends. Will you join us? It"s less boisterous than the foyer and ballroom, but easier to talk."
"Sure," I said. In some part of my mind, I recognized that he spoke strangely, his words overly formal or something. But I couldn"t really think about it. I tried a bit, but the thoughts wouldn"t stick, and by the time we reached the study, I"d forgotten all about it.
The room was oak-paneled and fancy, like something out of an old movie, and I looked around, taking in the paintings in gilt frames, the ornate furniture on which my friends and a bunch of other kids were sitting, and the ma.s.sive wooden desk.
I saw Carson and Jeremy on a sofa, just sitting and talking. Mindy was on an overstuffed loveseat nursing another cup of punch. She looked up at me, her eyes gla.s.sy and her smile crooked, and I started toward her, determined to cut her off.
I"d taken one step when it happened - the room changed. The formal-looking study disappeared in a snap and suddenly I was in a room filled with nothing but red and black. Blood, I realized, and it coated the walls, the scent of it filling my nose and making me want to gag.
Something squished under my feet, and I looked down to find myself tromping on maggots, their fat little bodies bursting beneath my shoes.
And right in front of me, the big wooden desk was now a giant stone slab, like the kind ancient tribes used to make sacrifices to the G.o.ds.
Oh G.o.d, oh G.o.d, oh G.o.d...
I closed my eyes and tried to breathe normally, and when I opened them again - slowly and tentatively - the room was completely back in order.
What the heck?
I glanced at the lemonade in my hand. Maybe I should have cut myself off sooner.
On the couch, Mindy was peering at me, her forehead crinkled. I must have looked freaked, because she pushed herself up and started toward me. She, at least looked normal. At least that"s what I thought at first. Then I saw the weird tentacle things that were wrapped around her ankles and wrists. She, however, didn"t seem aware of them at all. And I sure as heck didn"t understand why I was seeing them.
I blinked again, and the tentacles disappeared, but the blood was back. Then the tentacles were, and I stood there hyperventilating as I realized that the long, gray squid-like arms were attached to all the kids, and that they extended back to Marlin, who"d taken a seat behind the blood-soaked sacrificial stone. I mean the desk. The slab. The desk.
I had no idea why I was seeing two versions of the same room, one very decidedly coming at me straight from the Horror Channel. But I did know with absolute certainty that Marlin was a demon. I mean, that was the only explanation, right? And his minty-fresh breath was a big, minty clue. Too minty. I should have realized; hadn"t mom trained me to notice breath? And didn"t demons have the nastiest breath imaginable? The kind of breath that they would mask with liberal doses of mouthwash and tons and tons of minty candies.
Oh, s.h.i.t.
The room was changing with every glance, as if I was looking at one of those holographic bubblegum cards that change slightly depending on the angle.
"Allie?" Mindy asked. "Are you okay?"