"Yes, sir, Africa, sir."
Leighton paused for a moment before he said:
"Nelton, you can"t go to Africa, not as a serving-man. You wouldn"t be useful and you wouldn"t be comfortable. Africa"s a queer place, the cradle of slavery and the land of the free. A place," he continued, half to himself, "where masters become men. They are freed from their servants by the law that says white shall not serve white while the black looks on lest he be amazed that the G.o.ds should wait upon each other."
He turned back to Nelton and added with a smile that was kindly:
"What would you do in a land where just to be white spells kingship--a kingship held by the power to stand up to your thirty miles a day, to bear hunger and thirst without whimpering, to stand steady in danger, and to shoot straight and keep clean always? It"s a land where all the whites sit down to the same table, but it isn"t every white that can get to the table. You mustn"t think I"m picking on you, Nelton. The man that"s going with me is always hard up, but I heard him refuse an offer of Lord Dubbley"s of all expenses and a thousand pounds down to take him on a trip."
"Lord Dubbley!" repeated Nelton, impressed. "Is there anything w"at a lord can"t "ave?"
"Yes," said Leighton. "There are still tables you can"t sit down at for just money or name, but they are getting further and further away."
"Mr. Lewis Leighton and servant" attracted considerable attention on the _Laurentia_, but let it be said to Lewis"s credit, or, rather, to the credit of his abstraction, that he did not notice it. Never before had Lewis had so much to think about. His parting with his father ought to have been more than a formality. Why had it been a mere incident--an incident scarcely salient among the happenings of a busy day? As he looked back, Lewis began to see that it was not yesterday or the day before that he had parted from his father. When was it, then? Suddenly it came upon him that their real farewell had been said in that still, deserted lane overlooking his father"s land of dreams.
The realization depressed him. He did not know why. He did not know that the physical partings in this world are as nothing compared with those divisions of the spirit that come to us unawares, that are never seen in antic.i.p.ation, but are known all too poignantly when, missing from beside us some long familiar soul, we look back and see the parting of the ways.
Then there was another matter that had come to puzzle his inexperience.
He knew nothing of his father"s theory that there is no erotic affection that can stand a separation of six months in conjunction with six thousand miles. To youth erotic affection is nonexistent; all emotional impulse is love. Along this road the race would have come to utter marital disaster long ago were it not for the fact that youth takes in a new impulse with every breath.
In certain aspects Lewis had the maturity of his age. People who looked at him saw a man, not a boy. But there was a shy and hidden side of him that was very young indeed. He was one of those men in whom youth is inherent, a legion that cling long to dreams and are ever ready to stand and fall by some chosen illusion. Reason can not rob them of G.o.d, nor women rob them of woman.
To Lewis"s youth had come a new impulse so entangled with contact with H lne, with Leighton, and with Natalie that he could not quite define it. He only knew that it had pushed Folly back in his vision--so far back that his mind could not fasten upon and hold her in the place to which he had given her a right. The realization troubled him. He worried over it, but comforted himself with the thought that once his eyes could feast again upon her living self, she would blot out, as before, all else in life.
He should have arrived in London on Sat.u.r.day night, but a heavy fog held the steamer to the open sea over night, and it was only late on Sunday morning that he disembarked at Plymouth. Well on in the afternoon he reached town and rushed to the flat for a wash and a change before seeking Folly.
Eager to taste the pleasures of surprising the lady of his choice, he had sent her no word of his coming, and as a consequence he found her apartment empty--empty for him, for Folly was not in. Marie opened the door, and after a few gasping words of welcome told him that Folly had just gone out, that she was driving in the park; but wouldn"t he come in and wait?
At first he said "Yes," but his impatience did not let him even cross the threshold. It drove him out to the park with the a.s.surance that it was better to hunt for a needle in a haystack than to sit down and wait for the needle to crawl out to him. For a while he stood at a point of vantage and watched the long procession of private motor-cars and carriages, but he watched in vain. Depressed, he started to walk, and his mood carried him away from the throng.
He was walking head down when a lonely carriage standing by the curb drew his eye. At first he thought desire had deceived his senses. The equipage looked very like Folly"s smart little victoria, but it was empty, and the man on the box was a stranger. Lewis approached him doubtfully. "Is this Miss Delaires"s carriage?" he asked.
The man looked him over before he answered:
"Yes, sir."
"Where is Miss Delaires?" asked Lewis, his face brightening.
"Doin" "er mile," replied the coachman.
Lewis waved his hand toward a path to the right questioningly. The man nodded. Feeling suddenly young again, Lewis hurried along the path with a long and eager stride. He had not gone far when he saw a dainty figure, grotesquely accompanied by a ragam.u.f.fin, coming toward him. He did not have to ask himself twice if the dainty figure was Folly"s. If he had been blind, the singing of the blood in his veins would have spelled her name.
He stepped behind a screening bush and waited to spring out at her. His eyes fastened curiously upon the ragam.u.f.fin. He could see that he was speaking to Folly, and that she was paying no regard to him. Presently Lewis could hear what he was saying:
"Aw, naow, lydy, give us a penny, won"t cher?"
"I won"t," replied Folly, sharply. "I said I wouldn"t, and I won"t. I"ll give you up to the first officer we come to, though, if you don"t clear."
"Ah, ga-am!" said the youth, whose head scarcely reached to Folly"s waist. "Course you won"t give me no penny. _You_ ain"t no lydy."
Folly stopped in her tracks. Her face went suddenly livid with rage.
"No lydy!" she cried in the most directly expressive of all idioms. "If I wasn"t a _perfect_ lydy, I"d slap your blankety blank little blank."
At each word of the virile repartee of c.o.c.kneydom coming so incongruously from those soft lips, Lewis"s heart went down and down in big, jolting b.u.mps. Scarcely aware of what he was doing, he stepped out into the path. Folly looked up and saw him. The look of amazement in his face, eyes staring and mouth open and gulping, struck and held her for a second before she realized who it was that stood before her.
For just the fraction of a moment longer she was frightened and puzzled by Lewis"s dumfounded mien; then her mind harked back for the clue and got it. No one had to tell her that the game was up so far as Lewis was concerned. She knew it. Her face suddenly crinkled up with mirth. With a peal of laughter, she dodged him and ran improperly for her very proper little turnout. He did not follow except with his eyes.
"Larfin" at _us_, governor," jibed the diminutive c.o.c.kney, putting a rail between himself and Lewis. "The "uzzy! The minute I lays my heye on that marm, I says, "Blime yer, _you_ ain"t no lydy"! I say, governor, give us a penny."
Lewis turned away and took a few steps gropingly, head down, as though he walked in a trance. Presently he stopped and came back, feeling with finger and thumb in his waistcoat pocket. He drew out a gold coin, looked at it gravely, and flipped it across the rail at the ragam.u.f.fin.
Then he turned and walked off with a rapid stride.
The little c.o.c.kney s.n.a.t.c.hed at the coin, and popped it into his mouth.
Too overwhelmed to speak his grat.i.tude, he stood on his head until Lewis was out of sight. It was the first time in his life that he had handled, much less possessed, a "thick un."
CHAPTER LI
The expert surgeon, operating for blindness on the membranes of the eye, is denied the bulwark of an anesthetic. Such a one will tell you that the moment of success is the moment most pregnant with disaster. To the patient who has known only the fraction of life that lies in darkness, the sudden coming of light is a miracle beyond mere resurrection from the dead. But he is warned he must avoid any spasm of joy. Should he cry out and start at the coming of the dawn, in that moment he bids farewell forever to the light of day.
Something of this shock of sudden sight had come to Lewis, but it came to him with no spasm of joy. A man who has been drugged does not awake to joy, but to pain. Liberation and suffering too often walk hand in hand. Lewis had felt no bondage; consequently his freedom was as terrible as it was sudden. It plunged him into depths of depression he had never before sounded.
From the park he went mechanically to the flat, and sat for hours by the window looking out upon the dead Sunday gray of London. Darkness came, and with it Nelton and lights. Nelton remarked that there was nothing to eat in the house.
"I know," said Lewis, and sat on, too abject to dress and go out for dinner. In his depression his thoughts turned naturally to his father.
He thought of joining him, and searched time-tables and sailings, only to find that he could not catch up with the expedition. Besides, as he looked back on their last days in America, he doubted whether his father would have welcomed his coming.
The next few days were terrible indeed, for Lady Derl, as he had feared, was out of town. He wrote to her, begging her to let him know where she was and when she would come to London. For three days he waited for an answer, and then the emptiness of the whole world, the despair of isolation, drove him to his studio and to work.
He had had an impulse to write to Natalie, even to go to her; but there was a fineness in his nature that stopped him, a shame born of the realization of his blindness and of the pity in which H lne and Leighton and perhaps even Natalie must have held him.
Suddenly the full import of H lne"s intimate sacrifice in the disrobing of the palpitating sorrow of her life and of his father"s immolation of his land of dreams struck him. They had done these things to make him see, and he had remained blind. They had struck the golden chords of the paean of mighty love, and he had clung, smiling and unhearing, to his penny whistle.
For the first time, and with Folly farther away than ever before, he saw her as she was. Once he had thought that she and youth were inseparable, that Folly _was_ youth. Now, in the power of sudden vision, he saw as his father had seen all along, that Folly was as old as woman, that she had never been young.
These things did not come to Lewis in a single day, but in long hours of work spread over many weeks. He was laboring at a frieze, a commission that had come to him through Le Brux, and upon which he had done considerable work before going to America. What he had done had not been altogether pleasing to his father. Lewis had felt it, though Leighton had said little beyond d.a.m.ning it to success.
Now Lewis saw the beginning he had made through his father"s eyes. He saw the facile riot and exaggerations of youth, and contrasted their quick appeal to a hurried age with the modesty of the art that hides behind the vision and reveals itself not to an age or to ages, but in the long, slow measure of life everlasting. He undid all but the skeleton of what he had done, and on the bare frame built the progression of repressed beauty which was to escape the glancing eye only to find a long abiding-place in the hearts of those who worship seldom, but worship long.
At last he got word from H lne. Has letter had followed her to the Continent and from there to Egypt. She wrote that she was tired of travel, and was coming home. In a postscript she mentioned a glimpse of Leighton at Port Said. Lewis was impatient to see her. He had begun to know his liberation.
The revelation that had come to him in the park was not destined to stand alone. Between such women as Folly and their victims exists an almost invariable camaraderie that forbids the spoiling of sport. The inculcation of this questionable loyalty is considered by some the last attribute of the finished adventuress, and by others it is said to be due to the fact that such women draw and are drawn by men whose major rule is to "play fair." Both conclusions are erroneous, as any victim can testify.
The news that Lewis no longer followed in Folly"s train permeated his world with a rapidity that has no parallel outside of London except in the mental telegraphy of aboriginal Africa. Men soon began to talk to him, to tell him things. He turned upon the first with an indignant question, "Why didn"t you tell me this before?" and the informer stared at him and smiled until Lewis found the answer for himself and flushed.
Ten thousand pointing fingers cannot show the sunrise to the blind.