Transition And Restart

"I don"t care any longer . "

Noriko never planned on doing this . A year earlier she wouldn"t have dared, but a lot had happened during that year .

"I"m sorry Kuri . " She was pretty certain she"d be rejected, but Kuri still had supported her when she broke down after Nao"s a betrayal . A betrayal that it turned out never happened .

She felt Urufu"s hands cover her own, and even though it felt like him caressing her, his fingers soon started to disentangle hers . From how rigid his body went Noriko understood he tried to break free, so before he did that she pressed herself harder against his chest . Or given the difference in height, his stomach .

Nao was even taller than Urufu, so Noriko was already used to such a ludicrous difference .

"Noriko, I understand you"re in shock, but this isn"t the time . "

"Idiot!" She allowed herself to be pried free from Urufu .

Nao was an idiot as well . If he noticed conflicting feelings in her he should have talked it out with her . Instead he invented a ploy where she"d hate him, and to a degree she did . Even though it turned out only being lies, in the end he still hurt her . Even though he"d only acted on his own fears, he still trampled all over her feelings .

Advertis.e.m.e.ntWell, he"d reached his goal, if he had one to begin with . Whatever love she felt for him vanished, buried under the result of his actions .

Right now, however, Noriko had another problem to deal with .

"Urufu, I"m shocked, but not for the reason you think . " She let go of him and sat down on her chair . "Sit!" she said and nodded at his .

He did as told, and hesitantly he picked up his fork .

"Please tell me," he said .

Noriko sighed and drew breath . This required gathering some courage .

"What he did was unforgivable," she said . Somewhere inside her she knew she still dodged the real issue at hand .

"But it was all lies!" Urufu put down his fork and met her eyes .

"I can"t pretend any longer . Urufu"s insensitive, but he"s not blind . " She reached out with her hand and took his fingers .

Urufu flinched, but he didn"t retract his hand .

"I"m in shock they never went away," Noriko said . That was deliberately cryptic .

"What went away?"
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"Didn"t go away," Noriko corrected him . She allowed herself to caress his fingers . He"d move his hand soon enough . "My feelings for you . I didn"t know, but I think Nao did . "

This time Urufu did move his hand .

"I…" He coughed silently . "You . . . "

"I know . You love Kuri, and I"m just a kid . Urufu, you promised . Don"t treat me like a child . Your loving Kuri is one thing . I have to respect that, but I at least want to be treated like a rival . "

For the first time Urufu smiled honestly . There was an embarra.s.sed sheen in his eyes, and Noriko noticed him fidgeting a little .

"Like a rival, you said . You"ll have to talk with Christina about that . " Urufu gave her a twisted smile . "Weren"t you in love with Nao?"

Noriko nodded . When did everything become so complicated? "But I think I never fell out of love with you . " She said it . She looked down at her plate . There wasn"t anything more she could do . Urufu would reject her feelings, and she"d feel sad and a little lonely . Still, it wasn"t as if she lost anything . He had rejected her once already .

"You flatter me . I"m not worth that effort . "

"How dense can you be?" Noriko looked up and met his eyes . "You don"t get to decide that . You have no right to my feelings . They"re mine and mine only . " "At least until you share them," she thought . A bitter little thought .

Urufu cut himself a piece of beef, pushed a little potato and sauce on it with his knife and ate . After he swallowed he looked at her . "I apologise . I"m no less honoured that your affection lies with me than I was last summer, but I"m poor rebound material . "

The smile that came to her lips was listless . Noriko could feel how it barely managed to reach her eyes . "I can"t do anything about how I feel . "

"You know I still love Christina . I probably always will . "

"That"s an opening, you know . " Noriko"s mind filled with giddy surprise that he didn"t reject her outright . "You might not even understand it yourself, but that"s an opening . " "I know . I"ll never force you to abandon those feelings . You share a background and age after all" "I have a chance! As long as I don"t push him into a corner . "

Urufu took another bite, and Noriko joined him in the dinner they shared . He was a surprisingly good cook, and his choice for today"s meal was excellent for a conversation . The food cooling did little to detract from its taste .

They ate in silence for a while, and Noriko stole glances at him from time to time .

"You"re handsome, but you"re not stunning like bro, or beautiful like Nao . So why did I fall in love with you to begin with?"

"I"m flattered about how you feel," Urufu suddenly said . "You promised not to make me stop loving Christina, so I won"t try to stop your infatu… feelings," he said .

Noriko stared at him . "Infatuation? For a year, even though I got to know you and accept your relationship with Kuri? Even if I spent half a year with Nao? Infatuation?"

She watched Urufu bite his lower lip .

"I apologise . I won"t demean what you feel . Please forgive me . "

Noriko didn"t answer . Memories of Urufu"s conflicted feelings about his lost wife rose in her . In the end those probably were what destroyed what he had with Kuri, and Noriko didn"t plan to go down that route .

Just as she was about to respond her phone rang, and Noriko rose, walked to Urufu"s small desk and picked it up .