Chapter 111 Cloud Nine: An Ephemeral Longing
The Feng household was radiant with festivity and joy, firecrackers crackling loudly at the front gates. It was the event the entire household had been waiting for ever since the start of the year: the birth of Second Lady"s son. A huge grin lit up the Chamberlain"s face as soon as he saw his new-born son, placed gently in his arms by the midwife that helped with the delivery. Rocking the baby lovingly, he turned to the First Lady.
“Does he look like me?”
“Very much; his features look as if they"re carved from the same mould as yours.” The First Lady smiled gently. “I"ll go check on the Second Lady.”
“I"ll come with you.” The Chamberlain handed the baby to the midwife.
Feng Luodi watched from afar as her parents entered the delivery room. Scarlet whispered into her ear. “The First Lady isn"t completely well enough yet; the physician had specifically reminded her not to enter the delivery room when he came the other day.”
Feng Luodi looked away from the room. “Jet, go in there and tell my mother that I"m coughing blood and asking for her.”
“Yes, young miss.” Jet always obeyed Feng Luodi"s orders to the word without any hesitation.
Scarlet helped Feng Luodi back to her own courtyard. “Would it be bad for you to ask for the First Lady to come out of the delivery room? The Master might berate you for it afterwards, young miss.”
“Father will be too happy to take note of it.” Feng Luodi said flatly. It"ll be much better for Mother to spend time with me, instead of having to watch Father and the Second Lady spend time together with their newborn son. Feng Luodi had not left the household ever since her incident that day, not wanting to hear any of those rumours spreading about her, only being able to avoid thinking about him like that
Scarlet nodded, glancing at Feng Luodi"s hands. “Your hands are almost healed, young miss. I"ll finally get to hear you playing the zither again in the courtyard! I"ve been missing your music sorely.”
“If you miss it enough, you"ll get used to it.” Feng Luodi was expressionless. It"s just a matter of time as to when you"ll never be able to hear me play again.
“Are you alright, young miss? You"ve been saying weird things lately.” Scarlet looked worriedly at Feng Luodi. Young miss has always been a quiet, delicate kind of pretty, the kind of beauty that becomes obvious only after looking at her for a while and that one can never get sick of. Not only that, her warm and genuine personality should be very attractive as well! But why is it that she hasn"t had any suitors ever since the Duke of Anping had proclaimed his love for her when she was kidnapped by the 7th Prince?
“Don"t be silly, Scarlet. What can happen to me? I"m spending all my days with you guys.” Feng Luodi glanced at Scarlet, melancholy deep in the recesses of her eyes. I"ll have to work on changing their lowly status as a handmaiden of the household soon; I don"t want them to be bound to stay when I"m no longer here.
Scarlet continued idly. “It"s the first time you"ve been sick for so long ever since you fell into the water last Spring, young miss. Those two from Huaiyang were really too much! But then again, they got what they"d deserved indeed: one is stripped of his n.o.bility, and the other is sent to the Ailao Kingdom for an arranged marriage. In some ways, you"ve gotten your revenge.”
Feng Luodi smiled and teased Scarlet cheekily. “Do you know why the Emperor had wedded the 5th Princess to the Ailao Kingdom?”
Scarlet c.o.c.ked her head, deep in thought. “I remember Young Miss Qi saying that the Ailao Kingdom is as good as an unfavourable subject to the Emperor, seeing as how they"ve only surrendered to us early this year. The marriage is a punishment to the 5th Princess, having someone of her birth wedded to a prince from an unfavourable subordinate kingdom, one that can be easily stripped of their status if the Emperor wishes to do so.”
Feng Luodi headed straight to her room to pretend that she was unwell, Scarlet close behind her. “That"s Jianqiu"s opinion on the matter; I"m asking for yours.”
“Mine? Well, I think much simpler than Young Miss Qi, that"s for sure. Master Jiang had mentioned that many of the paternal clan of the princess had gotten into some trouble, some even stripped of their rank and n.o.bility. If that"s the case, shouldn"t that implicate the Fifth Princess as well? But now that she"s sent all the way to the Ailao Kingdom to be the wife of a prince, or possibly, the wife of a future king, her circ.u.mstances are much better than what might have happened if she"d remained in Chang"an. I"m sure the Emperor dotes on her a lot.”
Feng Luodi smiled, but did not comment on Scarlet"s opinion. I"m sure Scarlet heard that from someone else…Fei, perhaps.
The newborn boy was named Feng Fuyou, hoping that he"ll be blessed and prosperous for all his life. He was a chubby and cheery kid, his bright eyes staring at the world in curiosity all the time, giving a huge toothless grin to all that he met. Needless to say, young Feng Fuyou quickly garnered the adoration of the entire household.
It was an important day again for the Feng household – the Full-month Celebration for young Feng Fuyou. As the Second Lady was still weak from childbirth, the taxing duties of organising the celebration naturally fell onto the shoulders of the First Lady. Hoping to relieve some of her mother"s burden, Feng Luodi quickly volunteered to help, leading the handmaidens and attendants of the household in a bustle.
Vastly different from the previous celebration, or so to say, Feng Luodi"s Full-month Celebration, this celebration was much busier than it would have been. Where it was merely a gathering of Chamberlain Feng"s few friends and a feast for the entire household in the past, gifts had started streaming in from all over Chang"an since a few days before the celebration this year, many by people whom the Chamberlain barely knew. When it came to the day of the celebration itself, throngs of guests turned out at the household. It was to a point where the head steward was frantic trying to source for more plates and food for the banquet, to accommodate the influx of guests.
“Fu Bo.” Feng Luodi looked at the head steward, whose face was etched in worry. “I"ve gotten Fei and some of the attendants to move the plants in the garden into the antechamber so that we can make s.p.a.ce for the tables. If we spread the banquet from the antechamber all the way to the garden, lining it up with the potted plants, we should have enough s.p.a.ce to seat all of our guests.”
“Thank G.o.d you thought of that, young miss.” Fu Bo looked down embarra.s.sedly. He"d never had to handle such a big banquet before and was at a lost.
“I"ve invited chefs from Manchun Tang to cook for us and they"ve brought some tables and chairs as well. Will you be able to sort those out?”
“Of course, of course.” Fu Bo nodded repeatedly, but looked at Feng Luodi in confusion. “Wouldn"t the chefs from Manchun Tang cost a lot? Master had specifically ordered for us to keep it small.”
“I don"t think we can keep it small anymore today, Fu Bo.” Feng Luodi frowned at the stream of distinguished guests. “The fees for the banquet would be footed by Autumnal Ombre; I"m sure Father will not object to that.”
Fu Bo nodded along. Seems like our young miss can do much more than playing the zither; she"s handling this much better than I am. “I understand, young miss. Please rest when you get the chance; you"ve barely recovered from your incident.”
“Don"t worry about that.” Feng Luodi waved him along. Slowly, the proceedings of the banquet felt into shape and no longer needed her to oversee everything. Heaving a sigh of relief, she slowly headed back to her courtyard. As she walked past a group of officials, she couldn"t help but overhear their conversation.
“Did you see the Duke of Anping? He really came! I guess the rumours are real; Chamberlain Feng is such a lucky man.”
“I told you, didn"t I? The young miss of the Feng household has been close to the Duke of Anping for a while now. Who knows? They might"ve even been privately engaged to each other! Most of us here are here in hopes of seeing the Duke; we"ll be in luck if he recognises the potential in any of us!”
“If only I had a daughter that could catch the Duke in her hands just like that of the Chamberlain. That d.a.m.ned son of me only knows to cause problems for me.”
“Ha! You"re too late!”
Feng Luodi dug her nails into her palms. I knew it. Dressed in plain clothes, none of the officials recognised her as she made her way back to her courtyard. Filled with rage, she stepped into her courtyard only to see an elegantly dressed Situ standing beneath the tree beside the table, inspecting the Guqin Cloud Nine curiously.
Situ heard the approaching footsteps and looked up, the girl who he"d tried so hard to stay away from for the past two months. A mocking smile hung from her lips.
“Well well, why everyone is saying that I am going to marry you? I don"t remember agreeing to something like that.” Feng Luodi balled her hands into fists and walked closer, stopping five yards away from Situ.
“I"m the only one you can marry.” All the speeches and words he"d prepared evaporated and that was the only sentence that left his mouth.
“Are you forcing me into a marriage?” Feng Luodi did not mask her anger any longer. “That is not the Duke of Anping that I know.”
“Then tell me what you want. What do I have to do for you to agree to it?” Situ"s eyes scorched her when it met her eyes.
Feng Luodi smiled and shook her head. “I thought I"ve made it clear already. Your Highness, I will not marry you. Please do not do these things again; I am but a lowly woman, not worthy of your attention.”
Situ stepped closer to her, looking down upon the girl before him. “How cruel, Luodi. Do you even have a heart?”
“Of course I do. But it is cold and hard, and nothing can change that.”
“Luodi.” Situ called out, his deep voice echoing in the empty courtyard. Their eyes met.
Feng Luodi looked away. “Please conduct yourself with dignity, your Highness. There are many outside waiting to see you; please do not let me keep you here any longer.”
“Do you have to do this?” Situ kept his gaze pinned upon her.
“What else can I do?” Feng Luodi still refused to look at him. “Please, your Highness.”
“If you wish.” Situ took a last, long look at her and turned to leave, his footsteps sending echoes through the courtyard.
Only when he was gone did she allow her tears to fall. Feng Luodi slowly walked towards the stone table, setting her hands to the cold strings of the Guqin.
A song of time
Blossoms dancing in the sky
Never to be again
I am but a wisp of smoke
I long for the love of a century
But it"s all I can do
Picking withered flowers from the earth
If I can never see you again
In this life or the next
Let this be
An ephemeral longing
For an impossible eternity